I was recently thinking about the impact that AI made on Skyrim modding and it came to my mind, why not go further?
We are now in an era when everything is developing so rapidly and it affects Skyrim modding a lot. I'm amazed that it's possible to type a dialogue line to a window and an NPC will respond with their own voice (still slow and uncanny but it's possible). There have also been many groundbreaking mods published, like OAR, DBVO, light limit fix is being worked on...
I'd like to take your time and imagine, what mods are not yet possible (maybe?) to make, but would be super fun?
For me, the best thing would be to engage other senses to the game, besides the sight and hearing. Imagine smelling a forest or an air after a storm, or tasting a sweetroll. That would require a full headset, but maybe something like that will be made in the future? And imagine the mod titles, "Smells of Skyrim", "Gourmet's taste" etc, that would be something.
AI generated responses would be super fun too, if the AI model was trained to behave like a specific NPC, not like a general language model.
What do you think? Share your ideas, maybe someone will use them in the future :)

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In a bustling mining town:

Jax had been enjoying himself. The war stories and barely believable tales of antics of the Humans he'd served with he told in the coffee parlors were popular among the intoxicated of both sexes, though the admiration and further libations from the men were far less captivating than the rapt attention a very pretty woman with a lithe figure and strong tail gave him. Comely indeed, and she would come to listen to him. Though it seemed to onlookers that he had captivated her, it was her dark pools of eyes that he had dove into, and found them deep and inescapable. She kept those eyes trained on him so long as he spoke, and so he spoke, seeing in those depths possibilities.
Indeed, Jax had begun to expect that if he were to ask Rae to accompany him to the upcoming autumn festival, she might not reject the notion. Even with troubling rumors about somebody attacking a neighboring nation, and the sudden vanishing of the Star Sailors from Star Council space were far from his mind, and the minds of the other coffee patrons parlor patrons. It was in this ease and comfort that he and many other Numiindan residents found their lives shattered by horror.
It began with the burning streaks of the wrecked Space Defense Force, more law enforcement than military, fell from the sky. He was just in the middle of a story about the time his buddy Erin had gotten stuck in his own armor when he stopped and said, "Does anybody else smell smoke?"
There was a general testing of the air by the group of variably intoxicated patrons, followed by a fruitless checking of datapads for the news. "Network's down," somebody in the small crowd said.
"Well, we'll just go outside and take a look," Jax said, and Rae subtly clasped his hand. Outside, the pair squeezed each other's hands so hard they hurt. The sky was streaked with gashes of billowing black smoke of destroyed ships and fighters, and what destroyed them was descending while raining hot plasma down on anything that looked vaguely like it might be fortified.
"The Ancestors preserve us," Rae whispered.
"I'm not going to wait on them," Jax said, "we need to get under cover now, and not just the lounge!"
Someone in the crowd said, "The mines! There are some pretty big chambers down there, and it's like, miles of rock to burn through."
"Good plan," Vex said, "If they're doing areal lances like that they don't care about collateral damage, everyone, split up in groups of three or four, and get as many people as you can to get to the mines."
"What if they follow us down?" Rae asked.
"We'll flood the mines. Hopefully they can't swim."
An hour later, a press of over a hundred panicked elderly and children were running along behind Jax. The majority of the parents and other adults had elected to buy time. Jax had to focus on his mission, save the civvies, get them under cover, to keep from bolting off to join them. "As long as the pups are alive," he muttered.
The sounds of shouting and plasma lance discharges spurred him and Rae on, and though he was obliged to lead the way, she insisted on bringing up the rear. She insisted that none of the injured were left behind. Then, they saw it, salvation. The gates to the mines, and behind them, the shaft plunging down beneath the rock. There were miners with plasma cutters and force axes at the gates, and Jax knew better than to relax. Even as the miners swung the gates open and escorted their panicked charges to the shaft elevator.
"We're getting ready to flood the main shaft, and everything but the vents to the largest chamber," one of the miners said, "get everyone up against the back wall, and pray the Ancestors remember us."
Jax just nodded and gripped his crowbar as he scanned the road they had run down saying, "I'm going to need fighters. We have to hold out until the Republic gets here."
"The Republic? You think they'll come?"
"Of course," Jax said with steel in his voice, "of course."
The next day, Jax held a meeting with the others he was thinking of as the leaders, or maybe other fighters, to tell them what he thought and hear what they thought in return. They had swam to an air pocket in one of the flooded tunnels and held their conversation in the dim light of a portable glow lantern to keep the civvies from panicking at what might be said. There Jax and Rae floated with Kai, a miner and the one who had suggested sheltering in the tunnels, Mei, an engineer in from the big city to help design an upgraded refining facility, and Ash, a man reluctant to divulge his past.
"So, we have about eight hundred civvies, none of whom are in fighting shape, no weapons, no food, and a highly defensible position," Jax opened, "I believe our first priority should be arming ourselves so we can raid the surface for food."
"The first aid kits are barely adequate. They're made to deal with maybe a localized plasma burn from a cutter malfunction, or to put temporary splints on a broken limb. Not lance wounds and to stabilize breaks for healing," Rae murmured softly.
"I did a little scouting," Kai said, "Just popping up in the vent covers, they didn't see me. I saw my house. What's left of it. Anyway, I know how to get to where there are some weapons we could get if we're quick. If we're quiet."
"The flooding did significant damage to the mines," Mei muttered. "I haven't seen any signs that it's getting worse, but the quakes will probably keep on. We will have to reassure the civilians. If they bombard the town from orbit though…"
"There's not much we can do about that," Jax said firmly, "so let's focus on what we can manage. Weapons, food, medicine."
"Blankets," Ash said, "The people are cold, scared. Blankets will help with morale. Survivors. There might be survivors."
"Weapons, food, weapons, blankets, and survivors. Okay, that's a start. Who wants to tell them?"
"Will the Republic really come?" Ash asked.
"They will come," Rex said firmly.
"I can tell them," Rae said as she reached out to clasp hands with Rex. He let her squeeze his hand once, and they dove down into the water to swim back to the main chamber.
The people were understandably stressed at the news that their only protectors would soon leave them alone, but they were reassured when Rae explained that they planned on raiding the surface for supplies and planned to be gone for a few hours at most.
Later, Ash was skulking around a police station, or at least the charred remnants of one, while Jax tried to see him doing so from inside the vent cover. He had been a little aprehensive of the man's claims that he could scout the building unnoticed, but the proof of the meat was inside the shell, so he took a chance. It paid off.
"All clear," Ash whispered from outside Jax's field of view.
"You made your point," Jax said, "good work."
"It's… it's not good in there."
Jax opened up the vent cover, and dropped to all fours to creep his way to the shattered building, and his companions did so behind him.
They squeezed through a gap in the rubble and slowly shifted the rubble until they had tunneled their way to the basement stairs, which they descended immediately. They tried to ignore the singed and shattered corpses of the police officers as they crawled past or over them. They failed at this. They had marginally more success in ignoring Rae's vomit at the grizzly task.
In the basement they found chemprop weapons, magacs, plasma casters, and long distance tasers in rifle and pistol configurations, as well as some light flak armor and personal shields. "Don't bother with the casters or tasers," Jax ordered as he wrapped his hands around the familiar shape of a rifle stock, "Terrans use these for a reason." The others deferrred to his experience, and Rae went to check the other basement rooms for medical supplies.
When she cried out, Rex and the others rushed into the adjoining room, but found no danger there. Only the chief of police, a magac pistol lay at his feet, and the wall to his left was painted in a sanguine splatter. "Nim," she almost moaned in grief.
"You knew him?" Ash asked.
"My uncle."
The others murmured their apologies, none of them strangers to such loss in the past day, and Ash pulled a discarded coat over the man taken by despair. "We have to make sure the people don't decide that this is a good idea," he softly murmured.
"Okay, see what else we can find for supplies here. Kai, can we get to a clinic from the tunnels?"
"Three of them."
"We'll hit the nearest one first, then we swim out to the bay and see if we can get anything from the fishery."
Then, they once again committed to the grizzly task of crawling through the rubble.
The clinic was miraculously intact, only a little exterior fire damage from the fighting, but it was also guarded. The invaders hadn't expected anyone to actually attack with weapons, as thus far most resistance had been fierce but only armed with improvised weapons. The two guards were relieved of their duties by magnetically accelerated iron chunks that left golf ball sized exit wounds in their backs before they even knew they were under attack. Inside, there was not only a treasure trove of medical supplies, which Rae directed them to take only the most versatile or in most dire need, but there were also prisoners in one of the exam rooms. They had injuries that indicated that they were painful but not lethal. Jax was furious.
The fishery offered enough food for the next few days, and their triumphant return kindled hope in the sheltering civilians that they might just hold out.

In low orbit over Numinda:

Acolyte-Lord Gukea-Sarvon surveyed his glorious conquest. Glad he was to have received orders to seek out resource rich planets, for instead of wasting his talents spilling unworthy blood to sate the thirst of Axzuur, he had instead found a race worthy of toiling for his glory. They could never be true warriors, Five days, and he had obtained control over the system and planet. Truly, the pathetic resisance offered by their so-called fleet had dismayed him, but the reports of the ferocity with which the males and some of the females on the orb below fight against his warriors armed only with what is to hand, and sometimes merely tooth and claw, excited him greatly.
It would be pleasing to elevate the lion's share of Axxaakk serfs to more worthy work, to more… worthy services. This new acquisition would even free up many serfs to become warriors, even, which would mean more sacrifices to Axzuur, which would mean greater favor. Although, there were still pockets of resistance across the planet. Even though his forces controlled the communication infrastructure for the planetary and superluminal networks, these pockets seemed to somehow act in concert to keep vital positions outside the Axxaakk's rightful reach.
It would seem that a mere scout group was insufficient, so he was being reinforced by, Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn, who had been reassigned to a subjugation group including a battleship, three frigates, and their escorts. This should provide sufficient warriors and equipment to properly subjigate the planet, freeing Acolyte-Lord Gukea-Sarvon up for the much more pleasant task of crushing the next planet's defenses. Just two days of further drudgery until Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn arrived to take on the unenviable task of crushing the indipendent spirits of the new serfs. At least he had a few specimens for his own research in the best methods to do so to occupy his time.
Two days later, Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn had sent his counterpart sprawling off of his own dais with a metalic backhand slap, "WHY ARE YOUR ESCORTS NOT INTERDICTING HYPERSPACE EXITS AROUND THIS POSITION?"
Acolyte-Lord Gukea-Sarvon staggered to his feet in a fury, "BECAUSE MY SCOUT FLOTILLA WIPED AWAY ALL RESISTANCE IN LESS THAN A DAY!"
"Observe," Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn said coldly as he slammed a data crystal into an input, and the display screen lit up with the scene of a Terran fleet engaging an extraction fleet, and far from being swept away, they were fighting the extraction fleet to a slow defeat.
"Is that a stone temple?" Acolyte-Lord Gukea-Sarvon blurted out.
"It is."
"Why?"
"To show they can," Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn said with disgust.
Acolyte-Lord Gukea-Sarvon's eyes went wide as he asked, "How did that curiser take hits from behind."
"The Terrans apparently use kinetic weaponry, they fired the munitions in a slingshot trajectory while another ship forced it to maneuver into the line of travel."
"The calculations involved…"
"It is my belief that this is not even the main fighting force of the Terran military, for observe further," Acolyte-Lord Narrex-Quinn twisted the crystal to display a split video of several systems on the screen. "These look like merchant vessels with guns strapped to them, and Priest-Lord Tiglach-Pilexer agrees that is likely the case. These fleets are likely auxiliaries sent out to probe our strength while the Terrans gather their true forces."
"Thank you for relaying this, I shall indeed run hyperspace interdiction at the next world."
"Your orders have changed. We are to extract what we can, and carry it off to the Dominion. The expeditionary fleet is insufficient."
Acolyte-Lord Gukea-Sarvon resisted the urge to spit upon the floor. "I too have information. These… these mammal-worms are worthy of at the very least toiling underneath the Axxaakk. Though their forces are defeated, the people fight on, just as the serfs did before they were broken and rebuilt to Axzuur's glory, may the stars tremble at his step."
"They are mammals, hold hostage their young, as we do for an unruly serf."
"This is a good plan, brother."
"We must not allow the Terrans to surprise us as they did Acolyte-Lord Xamxi-Avav."
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Hello everyone! I've been dreaming about going on an epic road trip from Colombia to the USA, but I really don't want to fly. I've heard about the Panama Canal, but I'm not quite sure how it works or if it's even possible to cross it with a car. Can anyone shed some light on this? Is it possible to drive from Colombia to the USA using the Panama Canal or any other means besides flying? Thanks in advance for your help!

Hello friends, So today I (19)f have come to a realization. I could easily make my father’s (42)m life a living hell if I could try. So a little back story. I am the eldest of my fathers 3 daughters. So when I was younger my father was terrible he physically abused me for years until one night he Sexually Assaulted me. At 11 years old my whole life was turned in a living hell, I was scared and the physical abuse never stopped until at 15 my father dropped me off at school screaming at me that I was worthless and if I couldn’t act right to not come back. and that is what I did. He continued with verbal abuse over text and call, telling me how worthless I was and how I am treating him terribly. Fast forward a few years at this point my parents had been well divorced for years. Although, we were still going through a custody battle with my sisters. To make a long story short, this court was in a town with maybe 200 people this being said things were kind of janky here. So the case is being held the bring a lawyer to talk to me about my parents and what has happened at this point I hadn’t told anyone I had been SA’d by my father. He asked me a few questions and didn’t write any of my answers down. the court hearing went on and I had confessed to my mother what my father had done years ago, due to the stress of the situation and the build ups of ptsd I had been having at the time. We went through a therapist and even spoke to a social worker about how I was SA’d all for this to be thrown in the thrash and told since my father was intoxicated and it was so long ago they couldn’t do anything. All the pain relived for nothing. I know this is all over the place but stay with me. Fast forward to our last hearing the court did not let me speak, the court did not hear any of my mother family but did hear my fathers. The court ruled that my father could keep my sisters and gave my mother supervised visits because my younger sister and father’s family that my mom manipulated me in to lying about the abuse I endured all of my childhood. While my younger sisters had also endured his abuse and his family had seen it. I haven’t seen my sisters in 2 years. I haven’t spoke to them either I have no clue what has happened to them. This being said, Nothing can be legally solved now every thing has been “resolved” via court. I want to take revenge, I have a throw away account I felt exposing him through could work. But I need legal an down right evil revenge on the man who took everything light in my life away who has made me a trainwreck. I have worked on my self mentally to finally feel relief from what happened and I have healed but I feel deep down I can’t full heal until he feels sadness like did, anger like i did. Thank you reddit friends in advance!

Hello. I have encountered a few difficulties while trying to automate my Sonos music experience through HomeKit. For instance, when creating a scene for Sonos to play a specific station from a music provider, it will only let me use Apple Music. It won’t allow me to select Sonos Music or Pandora or other services as a streamer. That being said, so far I am OK with the Apple Music selections. My difficult issue is trying to automate a scene that switches my Sonos to TV mode. I was able to create a scene within my Brilliant light switches that can change from Sonos music to the Sonos TV input but HomeKit cannot control that Brilliant scene. So I finally resorted to using a smart plug which is used as a proxy and Yonomi can then change my Sonos input to TV mode when the smart plug is turned on. I tried this with IFTTT and their service would not work. I had to jump through a lot of hoops to get to this point. Did I miss an easier path?

These updates were originally posted on the official Sapiens Discord server.

May 18th, 2023

OK so the update is out, which is a good feeling, it's always nice when months of work finally makes it out the door!
From here, I will be fixing bugs and making minor improvements for a few weeks probably. I had a good playtest session last night and made some quite decent AI improvements, but it's too risky to send it out on the main branch just yet, so that will come next week after some more testing.
After I'm happy that the release is good and all the loose ends are tidied up, it will be time to start working on the next major update. I'm actually planning to introduce multiplayer in 0.5, so that's really exciting, I can't wait to get started.

May 21st, 2023

The update is going really well! Thank you everyone for the feedback and kind words, as well as the bug reports too.
Today I'm working on the most-reported issues, which are mostly around AI and the compost bins, as well as a few crashes. I've already fixed quite a few of them over the weekend, so either today or tomorrow I'll be sending an update out to the unstable branch, to be released later in the week.
Overall though there aren't too many urgent issues to sort out, which is fantastic, and I'll be able to get back to working on new stuff again very soon.

May 23rd, 2023

I've been up later than normal coding today, as I've been quite excited about some of these AI changes, they're really coming along nicely.
There's now a way better prioritization system under the hood, so it makes sense to give you the prioritize button for any order, any time. And now when you use that, the plans actually really do get prioritized 😅

May 24th, 2023

Good morning, today I'm continuing to test and work on the AI and new priority system. I had a good play test session last night again and it's feeling so much better, especially when there are a lot of orders queued up.
It's quite a major change. That new prioritize button and the built-in weighting means that you have a lot more control now, so even if the AI doesn't get it quite right (which will always happen, performance limitations mean it's never going to be a perfect best-fit system), you have the tools right there to sort it out when you need to, and no longer need to limit the quantity of orders you give in order to maintain a good level of control. It really is a game changer.
So today I'm focusing on hunting. I'm testing all sorts of scenarios, and fixing up issues. Right now I'm making sure they don't abandon spears, and also won't pick up a spear that missed, to then carry all the way back to storage, while someone else comes all the way back to continue the hunt.
It's looking like I should be able to get this work wrapped up soon, for a release some time next week.

May 25th, 2023

I got the hunting working really well yesterday, so I'll be testing that myself over the next few days, and fixing issues before sending it out to the unstable branch next week.
However just as I was finishing off the hunting yesterday, I hit the graphical glitch and crash that a few people have been experiencing in 0.4. I think maybe it was because I updated my Nvidia driver recently, as I hadn't seen it before, but it's showing up quite reliably now which is great, because it means I can fix it.
I'd really rather be working on AI, but sometimes this is how it goes, you stumble on a bug and have to drop everything to make the most of the opportunity to fix it. The worst is when half way through fixing that bug you stumble on another bug... and so on until your head explodes... but let's hope that doesn't happen.

May 28th, 2023

Yay! I just fixed that crash. It took about 3 hours to track down. TLDR version is that fallen spears sometimes deleted their flax twine bit of the model from the GPU, but then tried to render with it, and I didn't have the information in the right place to be able to diagnose it easily.
Long version for anyone interested: What I could see was that if I loaded this particular save and flew in a particular direction, I would get GPU memory corruption with stretched out glitchy geometry and then often a crash at some point. By turning on Vulkan validation checking, I found that I was trying to render using a vertex buffer that had been deleted.
The tricky thing was finding out what buffer it was. I had no information, only a memory address for the buffer. So I had to go through every location in the code where I was allocating a buffer, and assign it a name to be able to identify it. Once I had done that, when it crashed, I could see it was a sub model for a moving object, but still wasn't sure the exact circumstances.
Eventually, by adding more and more details to the info that was being tracked, and then logging at various points in the creation of these buffers, I figured out that it was when a dynamic (flying or moving) spear was converted from a high detail model into a lower detail model, as you moved around. And with further investigation, it turned out that the twine model in a spear was being replaced out for a model with no render data whatsoever, it's just an empty model file, as you don't need to see that little blob of twine in the distance.
As a result there was a combination of 2 sub models that needed to be updated, along with one that needed to be removed. I was missing a single line of code to tell the renderer that it had been removed in that unique case. So I added the line, and now it's fine 🙂
So anyway, that's great. That's the most frequent crash by a long way, and it'll be fixed in 0.4.2, and I can go back to finishing off the AI testing.

May 31st, 2023

Good morning. Last night's playtesting went really well, the AI is starting to feel like a well oiled machine, I just wish I had spent this time a year or so ago!
I'm still finding the odd new bug, like I had to fix an issue where a sapien was sitting in the dark getting sad, but not moving to the light as I had broken something recently. But the issues are getting few and far between and overall it's a massive improvement. So after I've tidied up a few loose ends, it'll be ready to send out to the unstable branch later this morning, and after a few bug fixes it should be out for everyone late next week.
Here are the full release notes: AI/fixes:

• You can now prioritize any order at any time. Prioritized orders will tend to be completed before any other order.
• You can then deprioritize orders again to restore them to the default prioritization level
• Different plan types are now prioritized differently, so idle sapiens are much more likely to choose a recruit or hunt order than a store order.
• The outputs of prioritized orders retain the prioritization, so if you prioritize a gather order on an apple tree, then the store orders for the apples will also be prioritized
• If you manually assign sapiens to an order, they will drop everything and are much more likely to continue to work on that order.
• Sapiens are now a lot more likely to continue a single task to completion. Hunting in particular is much improved.
• If an item has a store order, it can now still be picked up and used for any other task, even if another sapien was heading to pick it up to store it.
• Taking a required tool to an order site now requires the order's role, instead of the general labor role. This improves efficiency as that sapien can then complete the order, and it stops tools getting stuck lying around waiting for the right sapien.
• Telling a sapien to stop, or manually assigning a sapien to an order now causes them to drop what they were carrying
• Fixes issues where spears wouldn't get store orders while hunting
• Fixes issues where spears and other loose objects could become invisible
• Order markers are now hidden when choosing a sapien to assign to an order
• Many bug fixes for AI issues relating to choosing orders
• AI performance optimizations
• Fixes crashes and graphical glitches

Balancing:

• More visitor tribes in the early stages of the game
• Visiting sapiens tend to stay longer
• Crucibles now degrade when used
• Reduced quantity of manure produced, as it was excessive and degraded performance
• Reduced quantity of sapien vocals when time is fast forwarded

I'm in my 50's. I went out on a date the other night and the kind, beautiful lady knocked me off my feet. Everything was so smooth-flowing with natural conversation, shared interests, the same outlook on life, and even flirting with light touching on the shoulders and thighs. I was the assertive one but she fell right into place and reciprocated. We closed the restaurant down and sat in my car for a bit where it turned to kissing and more petting. Her kiss seemed uncertain or non-committal for lack of a better way to say it. I chalked it up to the fact that maybe she's just not that great of a kisser (my last girlfriend of 4 years was an amazing kisser). We both had eaten a mint so I don't think it was bad breath. Well, she had to work the next day so we parted ways.
I texted her later in the evening to tell her that I really enjoyed her company and would love to see her again if she's up to it. Her response was, "It was nice to meet you. It seems as though we clicked - lots in common. You were not too handsy and you were respectful of boundaries for sure! I learned that I'm not ready to be with anyone yet. It scared me after our date .... that I liked someone - I want to be on my own longer."
My read was that she was just letting me down softly to try and not hurt my feelings and that this was an excuse. But then I remembered that she told me she was deeply in love with someone a year ago and they separated for a bit. While separated, the guy died. So, she really could be having a hard time with just now starting to date again.
My question: Should I just take her response at face value or should I read it as a "no" and move on? I really like her and it felt reciprocated throughout our amazing date. I don't want to be 'that creepy guy' and not leave her alone. I sent her one text a couple of days later (at the advice of a friend) that simply said, "Just checking in on you. 🌷 I hope you're having a good week!" in which she replied, "I'm doing well (my name). Thank you for checking on me." - Ladies, what's your take on this? Should I completely let go or check back at some point in the future?
Will you please mention your age when you reply? Thx!

( This isn't a symptom or related to any disorder. What i'm talking about is a harmless response the brain has. I am only pointing out curious behaviour that it sometimes has and it's repeated response.)
I've noticed this in alot of people and in myself and i am very curios as to what the brain is even trying to do (or what it is failing to do)
Whenever i see or hear something very creepy or unnerving my eyes water. I'm not scared in the traditional sense, i'm not even really that scared.
It's usually about paranormal stuff or just things that can't be explained. For example this doesn't happen to me when i'm watching a horror movie or playing a game (then i'm just tense and if i get jumpscared i scream).
It's a weird feeling, can't explain it, people who have had this will definetly know what i'm talking about . It's on par with a light version of dread.
It isn't weeping or stress crying. Crying out of anger, stress, pain, sadness, joy or anything else is completely diffrent. It's almost like your eyes are just cleaning themselves.
As a concrete example, i was listening to something while i worked and a story about the first chinese astronaut and how he kept hearing knocking on his spaceship came up. He didn't see anybody and it wasn't some tech failing. He just heard knocking on the metal of his spaceship. That triggered the response and a few drops filled my eyes.
Another quite creepy one was when i was little i had sleep paralysis and saw a weird futuristic bug monster from Scooby Doo. In full realistic detail and my god was that thing terrifying. I didn't even know what sleep paralysis was so it was a mistery for a long time. I know that's a scary monster but not so scary as to make my eyes water years later.
I don't believe in the supernatural at all and the only responses i've seen are that im an "empath" and that i can sense spirits. Unless the soul of a 2D cartoon came to haunt me then i think I'm safe.
They usually can go away if i expose myself to that a few times. I have no problem looking at that monster now obviously but until recently that wasn't the case.
My theory is that it's just the body's response to being very frightened, not just scared but more complexly frightened by something, like a credible idea or some past event. Kind of like how instead of fainting some people just lose power in their fist. The danger isn't in front of me so there's no need for andrenaline or for blood to be pumped faster so it just makes me teary eyed for some reason. It's just weird that it only comes up when convincing supernatural stuff is shown.
Another explanation from someone else was that it might be a form of synesthesia. "a neurological phenomenon in which stimulation of one sensory or cognitive pathway leads to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway."
I would really like to hear your thoughts.

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Ja’vail woke up with a yawn, her eyes squinting in the evening light. Her room was positioned in the castle on the west side, to ensure that Tor’s sun would wake her up for her duties. It was a purpose that it served with perfection, despite the fact that she really would have liked to sleep for a few more minutes.
However, her duty could not be delayed. It was her power that served as the linchpin to Tor’s spell, and she would fulfill her duty to ensure her Diarchy’s, and her world’s, future. With a grunt of exertion, Queen Ja’vail rose from her bed, stretched out her wings, and moved to the balcony before picking up her robe. As soon as she was somewhat decent, the Queen of the Night then opened her wings, looked to the skies, and began channeling her power into the spellform that had been weaved between the planet and its moon, renewing the bonds that connected them, and ensuring the delicate balance between her magic and her husband’s would not come undone.
She performed this ritual twice a day, every day, to ensure the spell’s continued existence. In the past few months she had performed it well before Tor had performed his own renewal, and had had to go remind the foolish drake to not only perform his duties, but to hurry up and get his tail to bed. Without her efforts, and her constant reminder to the king, the entire thing would come undone, ensuring their planet’s rapid descent into division once again.
Without the two dakri turning the planet, the two sides would either become too hot or too cold to sustain life, with the twilight between them ruled by monsters birthed from the nightmares of the oppressed.
It was with some surprise, then, that as she poured her soul into this undertaking, she could feel the thrum of her husband’s power clear in her mind, letting her know that Tor had already renewed his half of the spell for the night.
He really did need that sleep, she thought, giving a self-satisfied nod towards the setting sun before turning back towards her private chamber. She still had much to prepare for her night; even with the most pressing matter out of the way, she still expected a full schedule. Her court wasn’t especially busy, as the dakri found the night to be the best time to sleep and prepare for the next day.
That was besides the point, though, as her duties rarely involved overseeing the day-to-day rule. Rather, her task was to patrol the ǣther, hunt the nightmares that plagued her people, and to do her best to heal the source of those nightmares.
This was especially important now that she had cleared the Forest of Yith and had located the source of that particularly violent nest. It was best to keep those nightmares from returning, and for this cause she was going to attempt to enter the survivor’s dreams again. She doubted she would have as much success this time as she had last time, simply because almost drowning had weakened the creature’s defenses significantly. However, she had faith that she would at least be able to soothe the visitor’s dreams, and possibly gain a little more information on how he thought.
At the very least, she’d settle for a name. She couldn’t just keep calling it ‘the creature’ or ‘the survivor,’ as those ‘names’ grew heavy on the tongue, and wore down her patience. A name would also help the visit she had planned go a lot smoother, and would hopefully help them as they tried to convince him to come to the castle with them.
Once Ja’vail was dressed, she left the comforts of her room and made her way to her husband’s study. As she expected, he was still there, his desk still quite messy, a combination of his daily paperwork and the reports of the crashed alien spaceship forming the majority of the clutter.
Much to Ja’vail’s surprise, however, Tor wasn’t at his desk. Instead, the drake was standing at his window, looking out over the countryside and the eerie sunset before him, a reminder of the twilight that his people had escaped. In his hand he held a memory crystal, its red glow plainly visible in the slowly darkening room.
“Tor, are you alright?” the queen asked as she approached her husband.
Tor turned to look at her, surprise on his face. “Oh, I am well enough, I suppose…” he said, clearly still lost in thought. The king then looked down at the memory crystal in his hand, his brows furrowing in displeasure. “I have just received some… unsettling news. I was actually waiting for your arrival before deciding on anything.”
Ja’vail took a few more steps, her eyes locked on her husband's diminutive form. “What happened?”
Tor looked at her, then back at the stone. “It isn't easy to say this, but… we may have to kill the visitor.”
Ja’vail felt like her stomach had turned to ice. “Kill? Tor, what madness are you spouting? What crime could he have possibly committed while I was asleep to earn him a death sentence?”
Tor looked at his wife, pain in his eyes. “Nothing, dear. He’s completely innocent. That is beside the point, however.”
“Then tell me, what madness has overtaken you that you would murder an innocent?” Ja’vail demanded, her tone brooking no argument. “Or what monster are you, to have taken the place of my Tor? I must say, you have the likeness down, but your impression of his mannerisms leave much to be desired.”
Tor let out a mirthless laugh at that. “No monster or madness, my dark princess. Just a visit from an old friend…” he sighed again, before turning and holding out the crystal for Ja’vail to take. “Lady Siv paid both me and the survivor a visit today. She left me this, as well as a decision to make.”
Ja’vail looked at the crystal, before staring back at her husband, a dubious expression on her face. "And she told you to kill him? I do not remember her being so heartless.”
“And you would remember correctly. She was nearly in tears when I met her, though she did well in hiding them,” Tor said, before approaching his wife. He gently took her hand, and placed the crystal in her palm. “When she saw the visitor, she also looked into his future. This is what she saw. Please, do not force me to bear this knowledge alone.”
Ja’vail’s expression softened ever so slightly before she glanced down at the stone in her hand. “I will look, but I do not promise anything.”
Tor’s crest rose, but he did not say anything else. Instead he turned back to the window, waiting patiently for his wife to see what he had seen.
The memory took Ja’vail less than a second to go through, but she felt like she had been gone for a lifetime when the world came back into focus. She stared at the rock in horror, before throwing it to the ground. It did not shatter, it being made of quartz, but it still felt satisfying after the horrors she had witnessed.
“I was not pleased, either,” Tor said, not even bothering to turn and look. “Even if the visitor was guilty of some crime, I would spare him for what he could teach our people. As it stands, he is lost and alone, hoping for a friend. And I have to kill this lonely soul.”
“But… but we can’t do this! You’re better than this… we’re better than this!” Ja’vail said, nearly in tears. “Would we really sacrifice an innocent for the security of our own realm? Would you… would you…”
“Would I what?” Tor asked, turning to his wife, fire in his eyes. “Would I judge the worth of souls? Would I weigh a single life against the good of my people? Of his people? Would I become my father?”
Ja’vail looked away, her eyes closed as she folded her arms. “I’m… I’m sorry…”
“Don’t be,” Tor said, turning back to the window. “You have no need to apologize. I cannot measure the worth of anyone’s soul, nor would I try. However, this visitor’s life is not worth the lives of every person on this planet. When you include the lives of his own world, as well as the unnamed snake people… well… the choice is quite obvious.”
Ja’vail looked down at the floor, her eyes filling with tears as she thought everything over. “Would it have been better, then, had I not saved his life? Should I have let him drown?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper.
“Maybe. Maybe not. All I know is that the spirits have told us that the lives of others are better off if his is forfeit,” Tor said, his voice filled with bitterness. “I have not even seen this visitor in the flesh, and I do not know anything about him at all. What is he like? Does he have a family? What does he enjoy?” Tor asked, looking to his wife hopefully.
Ja’vail shook her head, not daring to bring her eyes up to meet her husband’s, as she didn’t think she could contain herself if she did. “I cannot say. I was only in his mind for a brief time, and I do not understand much of what I saw,” she said, her form gently shaking, as if a chill wind had entered the room.
Tor looked back at the window, his eyes closed as he thought on this. “Essentially, we are deciding the fate of not only an innocent, but a complete stranger.” Tor took in a deep breath, then slowly let it out. “And try as I might, I cannot measure his worth as greater, or even equal, to the lives of my people’s. If it comes to it, he will be slain, and his body destroyed, just as the spirits have told us to do.”
Ja’vail began crying in earnest, her shoulders slumping with the weight of guilt. This caused Tor to turn to her, lifting her beak gently with one hand until she looked him in the eye. “So… let’s ensure that it never comes to that.”
Ja’vail looked up at Tor, hope in her eyes. “But, Tor, we can’t-”
“Shhhh…” Tor said, encircling his wife in his arms. He was shorter than her, but she still felt comforted, simply because it was him. “I’m not going to murder someone simply because of the damage his life might cause. Siv’s vision wasn’t that his continued existence spelled our doom, but that we must do everything in our power to ensure he doesn’t leave.” He pulled away from her a little, looking up into her hopeful eyes. “His death will be treated as a last resort, nothing more. For now, let us see how much worth his life is. What can he teach us? What is his people like? I, for one, do not want to squander this opportunity that the spirits have gifted us, simply for fear of an unknown future.”
Ja’vail’s crest rose as she dried her tears with the feathers on the back of her arm. “Yes… I completely agree…”
The two of them spent quite a bit of time like that, lost in each other’s arms as the sun slowly set on the horizon. Even after the world was shrouded in night, they were still there, lost in the comfort that each other provided.
* * *
Kel’vara’s beak glowed as she wove her magic, pulling the water from the bucket in front of her. It coalesced into a ball hovering inches above her hand, the swishing, splashing sounds of the liquid a soothing counterpoint to the frustration she was feeling.
She liked working with liquids when she was feeling upset. It had always come easy to her, the seemingly chaotic way it flowed and ebbed was a balm on her nerves, instead of a frustrating mess that most other practitioners found the state of matter to be.
She slowly flexed her fingers and extended her wings, the movements giving a tactile presence to the shapes she was forming in her imagination. Slowly, as if watching ice melt in reverse, the ball of water stretched and flowed, extending here, twirling there, molding and shaping to her will to become whatever she wanted.
In this instance, the water took the shape of a dragon, its long, strong legs striding through the air as it looked around, its inquisitive, intelligent eyes searching for prey, or barring that, a dakri to play with. Its long tail wagged behind it as it seemed to spot something, before it shot off like an arrow, dashing towards whatever had garnered its attention.
The small, watery, facsimile of a dragon didn’t get very far across the room before the door opened, breaking Kel’vara’s concentration and causing her happy little pet to lose its cohesion. In an instant, the once watery, spiky, two legged reptile was nothing more than a mess on the once clean floor.
Kel’vara looked up in annoyance, her gaze falling upon an irritatingly unapologetic Valros as he entered the room. “Haven't you ever heard of knocking?” Kel’vara demanded as she used her magic to scoop up the water and return it to the bucket.
Valros was unimpressed. “Kel’vara, you can’t just stay here sulking, we still have work to do.”
“I’m not sulking! I’m just practicing my more precise spell work,” Kel’vara said, turning up her beak as her crest lay flat against the back of her head.
Valros, however, did not look convinced in the slightest. “Kel’vara, The Lady is her own person. You can hardly expect her to stay around and answer every single question you have.”
“I never said that she wasn’t.”
Valros let out a frustrated sigh. “Well, if you’re sure, then I really think we need to go over the plan for tomorrow,” Valros said, trying to get Kel’vara back on track. “I don’t think we’ll need many knights, the thing’s pretty docile, all things considered. Have you given much thought in how we’re going to actually communicate with it?”
Kel’vara thought about this for a while, her beak glowing softly as she played a little with the water in her bucket, causing the surface of the liquid to ripple in odd ways. “Ja’vail said that she was able to communicate pretty well with it while it was dreaming. The only problem with that is that it was dreaming. I don’t know how dreams work with its species, but for dakri at least, anything that happens to our subconscious from outside forces is quickly forgotten. Bad dreams, flights of fancy, nothing to be taken seriously, or remembered.”
“I’ve been talking with the Captain of the Dreamguards about that too. He told me that we can’t rely upon that for communication, since we’re just as likely to get a straight answer as one about how the creature loves to eat its own pillow and ride a dragon made of Twirly Whirlys,” Valros said, stretching his wings a little and grunting with discomfort. The knight quickly brought his arm close to his chest, searching the broad wing until he found the feather that had been giving him trouble, and quickly put it back into its proper place.
Kel’vara found herself staring a little as the knight preened himself, before she turned away, her feathers fluffing a little in embarrassment. “Yes, and… ah, and in addition, the creature won’t be as weak as when we fished it from the river. It has an ǣon level spirit, after all, regardless of any actual ability it may or may not possess. We’ll be lucky to be able to intrude on its dreams at all.”
If Valros noticed her discomfort, he didn’t show it. Instead, he stood up and made his way to the window. “I remember the Sunrise Tribe had something to communicate, but it was mainly used to control their apprentices during ǣon training. It was supposed to be able to cross language barriers, but I don’t think we want to be dredging up the old ways…”
Kel’vara shuddered a little. “Those ways were barbaric.”
Valros nodded at her, but did not say anything as he stared out the window. “I suppose the only choice we have is to slowly teach the thing how to speak.”
“That’s not as easy as it sounds, though,” Kel’vara said, shaking her head. Valros looked at her, one of his brows raised, prompting her to continue. “When I treated his wounds, I ran a number of tests on him. He’s showing the symptoms of someone who has been transmuted into another shape entirely, except that he has no binding spellform keeping him in that shape.”
Valros looked confused at this. “You’ll have to forgive me, M'lady, but my knowledge of magic is somewhat limited to a handful of combat spells. You’ll have to use less formal terms with me.”
Kel’vara rolled her eyes a little, then used her magic to pull the water from the bucket again. With a thought, she caused the water to take on the shape of a dragon again. “With magic, it is possible to force something to assume another shape or state. Such as turning a dragon into a pig.” With a little exertion, the water took on the desired shape. “I’ll not bore you with the details, but things… well, they remember what they were. Always. If the spell is not properly maintained, the spellform will eventually fall apart, and the thing will revert. This is because things want to return to their old state. They’ll continue chipping away at the spellform, increasing the difficulty of keeping things in their altered state, until it grows beyond the mage’s ability to control. It’s why you cannot turn copper into gold and have it stay that way, or why you cannot turn dirt into food without accidentally poisoning someone.”
“Or purposefully poisoning someone,” Valros pointed out. “I remember history class at least. That happened quite a number of times during the Clan Wars.”
“It was a popular method of assassination, yes, but the old ruling class quickly caught on, and began screening their food before eating.” Kel’vara furrowed her eyes as she twisted the water to appear like the creature. “Whatever the bug-like aliens did to the creature, it didn’t involve magic. ‘The creature’s shape isn’t his own,’ if you remember what the queen told us. It’s entirely possible that it’s lost the ability to speak, even in its own language.”
Valros thought about this for a time. “Well, can’t we turn it back? Reverse the changes, and return it to its original shape?”
Kel’vara thought about this for a little bit, but shook her head. “It’s… possible, but there are so many unknowns. I was even afraid of using regeneration magic on him when I healed him. I had to resort to sealing spells to repair the damage.”
Valros looked confused. “I’m not sure I follow. I thought you healed it up pretty good.”
“I didn’t heal it at all. All I did was fuse its skin together, and do some very basic repair based on that strategy, to keep it from bleeding internally or externally. It’s why I still applied bandages, in case those wounds reopened; I couldn’t risk regenerating it,” Kel’vara explained, her voice both pained and exasperated.
Valros still didn’t understand what the fuss was about, though. “Why not? What’s the big deal if you use a little regeneration? And what does this have to do with changing it back?”
“Everything!” Kel’vara said, standing up in anger as she rubbed both hands through her crest. In response, the water in her grip twisted and flowed into strange shapes, a clear reflection of the tormented state of the battlemage’s mind. “This is an entirely unknown scenario, with an entirely unknown species! The spell to do this doesn’t even exist! All we have are spells to change something into something else, not to return something to its original shape. The way we would do this if this were a magical affliction would be to simply collapse the spellform, but this isn’t magic! If I were to try to change it back, any number of things could go wrong, the least being the creature dies a quick, painful death as it turns completely inside out! The closest I can come up with is the regeneration spell, which would force accelerated cell mitosis using the target’s remembered form, not its changed form. If I did use regeneration, it is entirely possible that the creature might revert…”
“...But?” Valros asked, knowing that there was a but in there somewhere.
“But the creature’s body might start attacking itself, killing itself from the inside out! The two different sets of genetic material might merge, making it into something even more monstrous than it is now! Any number of things could go wrong!” Kel’vara shouted, the water next to her turning into some kind of lumbering beast, whose basic shape only vaguely resembled the creature in the forest.
Valros held up his hands in a placating gesture. “Okay, okay, I get it. It’s probably a bad idea… but what do we do, then?”
Kel’vara collapsed into her chair, the water that she had been shaping falling into the bucket at the same time. “I don’t know… I really don’t know…”
Valros rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, there’s always pictures and trying to teach it to read…”
“That would take even longer than just teaching it to talk,” Kel’vara said dismissively. “Especially since it probably can’t-”
Before Kel’vara finished, a voice chimed in, interrupting her thought process. It seemed to be coming from the lieutenant’s belt pouch, and based on the tone of the speaker’s voice, whatever it was was urgent. “Sir Valros! Are you there?”
Valros quickly pulled out his whispering stone and gave it a squeeze, worry building in his heart. “What’s wrong, Calis?”
He almost wished he hadn’t asked, because what Calis said next turned his insides to ice. “Sir, I’m relaying a message. Viar and his drakes need backup, and they need it now. It’s those bug aliens the queen told us about. They’re here.”
First Previous
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Dun dun dun!!
Remember: if you can't wait, and want to find out what happens now, you can always just buy the books...
Amazon:
What I've Become
Nightmare of the Past
Google:
What I've Become
Nightmare of the Past

TW/disclaimer: Before I get into anything, this will discuss dysphoria and some of my own ways that I try to control it that I think that might be useful. That being said, I am transmasc and not all of these will work for everyone, and they may not work all the time.
Hoodies: What would we do without hoodies? For me, an ideal hoodie or sweatshirt to combat top dysphoria is one that's in the biggest size I can find and is soft and comfortable. They are especially good for relaxing after binding in public for a while. Sweatpants can also be good for bottom dysphoria.
Pillows: When I sleep at night, I always hug a pillow to my chest to help with top dysphoria making me too uncomfortable to sleep. It's also good if you are just chilling on your couch and dysphoria hits. I feel very dysphoric, I take it up to a new level and wrap myself in a cozy blanket.
Gender affirming scents: It may not seem like a big deal, but once I changed to soap, deodorant and cologne that aligned with my gender identity I haven't looked back. I'm a pretty sensory person, amd using those make getting ready for the day more bearable.
Loofahs, sponges, and the lightswitch: I find using a sponge or loofah in the shower is somewhat helpful, as that way I don't have to touch my bear skin. Showering with the lights off is also helpful, but please use a small light source like a nightlight or a bit light coming through the door from another room so you can avoid accidentally hurting yourself.
Voice training: Classic voice training is hella expensive, but there are Youtube tutorials available that you can use for free. Implementing some of these voice techniques can make speaking a bit more bearable.
Packing and tucking are also good ways to handle bottom dysphoria as well.
I hope you all have a good day and have a safe journey. Thank you for reading my dumb little tips

Posts in the series

• First: Here
• Second: Here
• Third: Here
• Fourth: Here (Unplanned)
• Fifth: Here
• Sixth: Here
• Seventh: Here
• Eighth: This

Brief recap

In the previous post, we continued our analysis with a second round of eliminations of more religions that cannot reasonably be from a judging and fair God. At this point, only the Abrahamic religions remain to be analyzed, which we will do below.
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The reason I wanted to analyze the Abrahamic religions together last is because they have many similarities. For one, they reference the same God and agree on many details: similar people, similar places, similar events and for the most part, even originated in the same region. In addition, two of them are the biggest religions in the world today, far ahead of all other religions in terms of adoption, nearly accounting for half of the people on the planet! The fact that they are spread out in time and that they reference each other, can at least in theory, represent a pattern of recurring communication. It's also possible that they're just copying from each others. Let's see!
The timeline of appearance of the Abrahamic religions from old to new is as follows:
Judaism

• Year of inception: 3500 years ago, approximately
• Location of inception: Middle East (Modern day Palestine)
• Messenger: Moses
• Referenced prophets: Adam, Noah, Abraham...

Christianity

• Year of inception: 2000 years ago, approximately
• Location of inception: Middle East (Modern day Palestine)
• Messenger: Jesus
• Referenced prophets: Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses & other prophets.

Islam

• Year of inception: 1400 years ago, approximately
• Location of inception: Middle East (Modern day Saudi Arabia)
• Messenger: Muhammad
• Referenced prophets: Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses, Jesus & other prophets.

Druze

• Year of inception: 1000 years ago, approximately
• Location of inception: Middle East (Egypt)
• Messenger: Hamza Ibn Ali Ibn Ahmad
• Referenced prophets: Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses, Jesus, Muhammad & other prophets.

Mormonism

• Year of inception: 200 years ago, approximately
• Location of inception: New York, United States of America
• Messenger: Joseph Smith
• Referenced prophets: Moses & Jesus. Does NOT reference Muhammad (Islam) nor Hamza (Druze)

Baha’i Faith

• Year of inception: 200 years ago, approximately
• Location of inception: Middle East (Modern day Iran)
• Messenger: Baháʼu'lláh
• Referenced prophets: Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha...

Can the Abrahamic religions be instances of communication from their common God? It’s possible, however some issues surface:

• Issue 1: The Druze faith stands out with its secretive nature as it is intentionally restricted. This not only opposes the intention of communication, but also contrasts with the other Abrahamic religions that are all open.
• Issue 2: Mormonism and Baha’i Faith both start nearly 200 years ago in different places while not being compatible with each other. They cannot be both instances of communication. One of them isn’t, or both aren’t.
• Issue 3: Mormonism doesn’t accept Islam nor Druze, while Baha’i Faith accepts all major religions, even Buddhism, which is incompatible with Judaism, Christianity and Islam.

Let’s keep the issues above in mind and apply the same criteria to the Abrahamic religions in the same way we did to all of the others. We will analyze them in the chronological order of their appearance.

Judaism

Let's analyze the message of Judaism.

• Criterion 1 (Living religion): PASS
• Criterion 2 (Warning of judgement): PASS. Judaism warns of judgment day and explains the conditions for success and failure. This makes it unsafe to dismiss! It's the first religion to pass this criteria.
• Criterion 3 (Universality): FAIL. While anyone can technically convert to Judaism, it seems like it was specifically destined for Hebrew people, who later became the Israelites. Many prophets after Moses were specific to the Israelites it seems. The beliefs themselves are universal, in that they don’t have anything in particular that caters to a specific group. Still, it seems restricted to the ethnic Jewish group.
• Criterion 4 (Past reference): PASS. Judaism references previous prophets of monotheism who were supposedly sent by the same God. Prophets like Noah and Abraham. This means that before Judaism came along, there were previous instances of communication, which is necessary for a judging and fair God.
• Criterion 5 (Alignment with reality): PASS. The idea that a God created everything and is testing humanity here on Earth is plausible and does align with the reality we are living. Almost all humans share a common life track: birth, weakness with need of care, strength and autonomy, weakness with need of care again, then death. Moreover, all humans have a certain level of free will. While no absolute free will of action exists, the free will to think and accept or reject ideas is guaranteed. This makes the judgment of such free will possible.

Now let's analyze Moses, the founder of Judaism.

• Criterion 1 (Impeccable social reputation): PASS. He was a leader to his people, the Hebrews. He saved them from the oppression they were living in under the Egyptians (1). He was known for his sense of justice and courage (2). Many of his stories are told in the Bible as well as in the Qur’an.
• Criterion 2 (Non-involvement rule): PASS. Moses is the first to pass this criterion. Every single founder of religion who was mentioned previously, was publicly involved with either an existing religion that served as a launch pad or had a profession or interest that prepared the terrain for their claim. Moses was raised by the Egyptians, but never adopted their religion, nor was he involved in any other religion that he publicly taught or engaged in. He also wasn’t known to have any profession where he produced thought or knowledge.
• Criterion 3 (Sudden self-produced life direction change): PASS. Moses killed an Egyptian who was mistreating one of his people. According to Britannica, Moses voluntarily killed the Egyptian after making sure that no one was looking (3). However, according to the Qur’an, Moses killed the Egyptian by accident after hitting him, and was instantly regretful asking God for forgiveness (4). Regardless of which version of the story is true, Moses fled because he feared for his life. Now here’s the sudden life direction change, he came back after a while by his own volition claiming to be sent by some God who was unknown to the Egyptians, then confronted the Pharaoh himself!!! No sane man would do such a thing! And not just that, he survived everything and won in the end!!!
• Criterion 4 (Complete devotion): PASS. Moses came back to a place where he feared for his life, put forward the exceptional claim that he was sent by a God he wasn't involved with when he left, confronted the ruler, and succeeded against incredible odds!
• Criterion 5 (Wide reach of message): PASS. The message of Moses had and still has a big influence on this very day! There probably aren’t many people in the world today who don’t know who Moses is, regardless of their beliefs. He is one of the most important prophets in many major religions. His legacy is still a part of the Bible as the Old Testament.

If there is a judging and fair God, Moses is highly likely to be one of his messengers. He passes all the criteria while explicitly making the claim of being sent by a God. If he was a fraud, he would have had an existing history of it, and he wouldn’t have dared to come back to a place where he killed someone and feared for his life, then challenge its ruler and win! If he was a deluded self-appointed leader to his people, that delusion would have been his demise. He would have been killed, as other religious founders have. Instead, he and his people, although an oppressed minority without any military power, were able to escape their oppressors and defeat them! This is impossible without some powerful external assistance.
One can reasonably claim that the story of Moses is just a myth that is made to look impressive. That would be fair, except it had more impact than what a myth can fathom. That being said, even if we accept that it’s all a myth, or at least a heavily augmented truth, it is still told by other Abrahamic prophets who happen to have had similar or more impact than Moses did. This makes his story as valid as theirs can be. So, let’s continue our analysis.
Sources:
(1) From Britannica: Moses... Hebrew prophet, teacher, and leader who, in the 13th century bce... delivered his people from Egyptian slavery...
(2) From Britannica: ...When he found an Egyptian taskmaster beating a Hebrew, probably to death, he could control his sense of justice no longer...
(3) From Britannica: ...After checking to make sure that no one was in sight, he killed the tough Egyptian overlord...
(4) From the Qur’an (translation): ˹One day˺ he entered the city unnoticed by its people. There he found two men fighting: one of his own people, and the other of his enemies. The man from his people called to him for help against his foe. So Moses punched him, causing his death. Moses cried, “This is from Satan’s handiwork. He is certainly a sworn, misleading enemy.” He pleaded, “My Lord! I have definitely wronged my soul, so forgive me.” So He forgave him, ˹for˺ He is indeed the All-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

Christianity

Let's analyze the message of Christianity.

• Criterion 1 (Living religion): PASS
• Criterion 2 (Warning of judgement): PASS. It does warn of an upcoming judgment and details the conditions of success and failure. This makes it unsafe to dismiss.
• Criterion 3 (Universality): PASS. It is definitely universal. Anyone can be a Christian, and it’s easy to find Christians from different countries, different ethnicities speaking different languages. It doesn’t get as universal as this!
• Criterion 4 (Past reference): PASS. It references previous religions and prophets, like Noah, Abraham, Moses, and many others. All of them being sent by the same God.
• Criterion 5 (Alignment with reality): FAIL. Some concepts in Christianity don’t align with reality well. Christians view Jesus as the son of God, but also as a part of God. God being three different entities, but still one: God the father, the holy spirit and the son. A concept called the trinity. Christians believe that God sacrificed his son in order to absolve humans from their sins. This doesn’t quite make sense for many reasons:

1: If God sacrificed his son in order to absolve us of our sins, judgment wouldn’t make sense. Also, why does a God have a son? Mortals have children to continue the species and to provide for them when they grow weak. A God doesn’t need a son...

1. If God sacrificed his son, also a part of himself, it should have been the final act of life here on Earth. Instead, he let Muhammad come after and be so successful in reversing this idea, all while claiming to be sent by him!!! And what about the people who died a long time ago and never knew about this important sacrifice?
   
2. The idea that God is all-powerful, all-knowing and all-loving doesn’t stand for a judging God. It simply isn’t possible for him to have these 3 attributes at the same time. If he is all-knowing, then he knows that many humans will fail his judgment and be severely punished. Consequently, if he is also all-powerful, being all-loving would have him not resort to judgment and not punish anyone. Since he insists on judgment with a heaven and hell, then he isn’t all-loving. Muhammad also happens to correct this idea.
   
3. The conditions of success and failure in the upcoming judgment are not particularly fair. It’s not about what actions one does during their life, rather, it’s about accepting Jesus as savior. One can be the most ruthless killer, then just accept Jesus as savior in order to be absolved of all wrongdoing. Also, what about all the people who lived and died before Jesus was even born? They didn’t know Jesus; how can they accept him as savior? Haven’t they spent their lives following other rules? Isn’t that unfair to them?
   

Now let's analyze Jesus, the founder of Christianity.

• Criterion 1 (Impeccable social reputation): PASS. Jesus had a notoriously flawless social reputation and was known for his noble morals.
• Criterion 2 (Non-involvement rule): PASS. He was raised Jewish, however he wasn’t particularly involved in any public religious activity, nor did he engage in any activity that produced thought or knowledge. He was a carpenter by trade (1), until his mission started. After which, and this is critical, he was immediately at odds with the existing Jewish teachings to the point of being in danger!
• Criterion 3 (Sudden self-produced life direction change): PASS. He was known to be a carpenter, then he suddenly turned into an itinerant preacher at odds with the established teachings (2). If he had been publicly learning or teaching Judaism before his claim, he would have failed this criterion, as almost all others have. However, it’s not the case, and the transformation is self-produced and puzzling! How does a carpenter who isn’t involved with religious matters nor any knowledge or thought producing profession, suddenly become an itinerant preacher with enough difference to the established faith to become a threat and a target?
• Criterion 4 (Complete devotion): PASS. He died for his mission (the Christian version is in contrast with the Islamic version here). There is no better test of devotion. He also was at odds with the established Jewish religion, which made him a target. Most of the founders of religion that we have seen, never entered in conflict with the existing religions at the beginning, rather, they built upon them and benefited from their involvement with them.
• Criterion 5 (Wide reach of message): PASS. Christianity is the biggest religion today! Nearly 25% of humans are Christians, and the rest know or have heard of Jesus. Now this, is communication!!!

Similar to Moses, if there is a judging and fair God, Jesus is highly likely to be one of his messengers. His feat is even more impressive than that of Moses. His mission and success in correcting and complementing the existing Jewish faith against incredible odds, adds more credibility to his claim. Jesus changed the world and continues to do so today!
Sources:
(1) From Britannica: ...Joseph is said to have been a carpenter (Matthew 13:55)—that is, a craftsman who worked with his hands—and, according to Mark 6:3, Jesus also became a carpenter...
(2) From Britannica: ...As a young adult, he went to be baptized by the prophet John the Baptist and shortly thereafter became an itinerant preacher and healer (Mark 1:2–28). In his mid-30s Jesus had a short public career, lasting perhaps less than one year, during which he attracted considerable attention...

Islam

Let's analyze the message of Islam.

• Criterion 1 (Living religion): PASS
• Criterion 2 (Warning of judgement): PASS. Islam clearly warns of an upcoming judgment and details the conditions of success and failure. Consequently, it’s not safe to dismiss.
• Criterion 3 (Universality): PASS. Islam is universal. Anyone can be a Muslim, and it’s quite easy to find two Muslims who are from different countries, ethnicities and don’t share the same language. The yearly pilgrimage where millions of Muslims gather is proof to how diverse Muslims can be.
• Criterion 4 (Past reference): PASS. Islam references many past prophets (25 in total), including but not limited to: Adam, Noah, Abraham, Ishmael, Isaac, David, Jacob, Jonas, Moses, Jesus... It clearly states that God has been communicating since the beginning out of fairness, so that people wouldn’t find any excuse when judgment comes!
• Criterion 5 (Alignment with reality): PASS. Islam insists on monotheism, and clearly reverses the trinity concept that has gotten into Christianity, as well as the idea that God is all-loving, on top of being all-knowing and all-powerful.

It aligns with reality well by describing reality as a test of free will. Life is neither the suffering Buddhism makes it out to be (which it isn’t), nor is it the joyous life Tenrikyo claims it should be (which again, isn’t). Every single human is continuously tested through good and bad. When it is something bad, it is their patience and acceptance that is tested. When it is something good, it is their capacity of being thankful and generous that is tested. Everyone’s life is a mix of good and bad. Exceptions exist and are accounted for.
Islam states that God has been sending prophets since the beginning in order to remind people that judgment is coming. It states that people who didn’t get the message will be tested again. Those who got the message of the prophet of their time, accepted it and followed its guidelines, shall pass the judgment. Those who rejected the message after receiving it clearly shall fail.
Now let's analyze Muhammad, the founder of Islam.

• Criterion 1 (Impeccable social reputation): PASS. Prior to his claim, Muhammad was highly regarded by his community and known for his trustworthiness (1).
• Criterion 2 (Non-involvement rule): PASS. Again here, Muhammad was not involved in the pagan polytheist religion of his community, even though it was popular, nor was he involved in any other religion. He was a successful merchant (2) and notoriously illiterate (3). He didn’t have any profession or interest that produced thought or knowledge.
• Criterion 3 (Sudden self-produced life direction change): PASS. Muhammad’s life changed drastically after he supposedly received revelation. The first contact shocked him greatly (4). After telling his wife what happened, she took him to her cousin who was knowledgeable about the Jewish faith. He told Muhammad that what happened to him was similar to Moses, and that a day will come when his community chases him away.
• Criterion 4 (Complete devotion): PASS. Muhammad suffered a lot for his claim and was under constant threat of death (5). He used to request to be guarded at night, however upon receiving revelation that God will protect him from people, he sent the guards away from that moment on (6). He was never harmed even while having many enemies who wanted to kill him.
• Criterion 5 (Wide reach of message): PASS. Muhammad, an illiterate person living in a remote desert, without any special means or skills, was able to spread his message everywhere, and he predicted it from the start (7). He created a civilization that would change the world in just 23 years. Like Christianity, Islam is found almost everywhere, and almost everyone has heard of him and his religion. It’s not by chance that the most popular male first name in the world today is “Muhammad” (8).

If a judging and fair God exists, Muhammad is highly likely to be one of his messengers. He was leading a normal and regular life in a polytheistic society for 40 years, then suddenly started preaching monotheism, suffering for it and even going to war for it.
Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: ...Due to his upright character he acquired the nickname "al-Amin" (Arabic: الامين), meaning "faithful, trustworthy" and "al-Sadiq" meaning "truthful" and was sought out as an impartial arbitrator. His reputation attracted a proposal in 595 from Khadijah, a successful businesswoman. Muhammad consented to the marriage, which by all accounts was a happy one...
(2) From Wikipedia: ... It is known that he became a merchant and "was involved in trade between the Indian Ocean and the Mediterranean Sea...
(3) From Wikipedia: ... Because he could not read and write himself...
(4) From Wikipedia: ...Muhammad was deeply distressed upon receiving his first revelations. After returning home, Muhammad was consoled and reassured by Khadijah and her Christian [sic] cousin, Waraqah ibn Nawfal. He also feared that others would dismiss his claims as being possessed...
(5) From Wikipedia: ...Regardless, several attempts were made at Muhammad's life...
(6) From Qur’an. Aisha said: "The Prophet was being guarded until this verse وَاللَّهُ يَعْصِمُكَ مِنَ النَّاسِ (Allah will protect you from mankind) was revealed." She added; "The Prophet raised his head from the room and said; «يَا أَيُّهَا النَّاسُ انْصَرِفُوا فَقَدْ عَصَمَنِي اللهُ عَزَّ وَجَل» (O people! Go away, for Allah will protect me)"
(7) From Sunnah: Miqdad reported that he heard God’s messenger say, “There will not remain on the face of the earth a mud-brick house or a camel’s hair tent which God will not cause the confession of Islam to enter bringing both mighty honour and abject abasement. God will either honour the occupants and put them among its adherents, or will humiliate them and they will be subject to it.” Miqdad said, “God will then receive complete obedience.”
(8) https://www.thebump.com/b/muhammad-baby-name

Druze

Let’s analyze the Druze faith!

• Criterion 1 (Living religion): FAIL. It’s not an extinct religion, but it is intentionally restricted and doesn’t accept conversions to it. How can this be a communication from a judging and fair God if the people being judged cannot have access to the material they need to succeed? If it stated that only a specific audience was targeted, that might have worked, but it doesn't say that, at least not when it started.
• Criterion 2 (Warning of judgement): PASS. Since Druze references other Abrahamic religions, I’m giving it a pass here, even though it’s not clear what the Druze actually believe.
• Criterion 3 (Universality): FAIL. It’s far from being universal. It doesn’t want to be, and it’s not.
• Criterion 4 (Past reference): PASS. It does reference other religions, even though it’s not clear in what capacity. Are the previous religions considered as previous instances of communication? Or does it complete its worldview with their knowledge? I’ll give it a pass.
• Criterion 5 (Alignment with reality): FAIL. Its closed nature makes it impossible for it to align with reality.

Now let's analyze Hamza Ibn Ali, the founder of Druze.

• Criterion 1 (Impeccable social reputation): FAIL. The Druze faith was named after Al-Darzi, who might have been either a disciple or a teacher of Hamza. A rivalry appeared between the two. Al-Darzi disputed the role of Hamza as the leader of the movement. They were both acquiring followers and engaged in regular brawls (1). So in summary, God supposedly sent Hamza as a messenger preaching that the current ruler was the embodiment of said God (If God is the embodiment of the ruler, why need Hamza at all?!!), then another man entered in competition with this messenger, who was also tolerated by the ruler, and even ended up giving his name to the movement, all the while the followers of each man fought each other. Then after said ruler was killed, the movement disappeared from its place of inception, but survived elsewhere and became a restricted religion. This doesn’t show anyone involved in a good light, especially not Hamza.
• Criterion 2 (Non-involvement rule): FAIL. There isn’t enough information about Hamza Ibn Ali before he entered Egypt in 1017. However, he fails the non-involvement rule, as he was appointed as a preacher in his own mosque before he started claiming that the reigning caliph was the embodiment of God (2). Rather convenient since that granted him support and favors (3).
• Criterion 3 (Sudden self-produced life direction change): FAIL. He supposedly received revelation, however that didn’t seem to cause any change in his life whatsoever. Receiving an unexpected contact from some God is supposed to cause a noticeable drastic change in one’s life, unless such revelation was expected or planned. Suffice it to say that he was already a preacher before supposedly receiving revelation.
• Criterion 4 (Complete devotion): PASS. Hamza definitely feared for his life but continued with his claim. He went into hiding, which seems a little bit cowardly for a prophet. In contrast, Moses came back to a place where he feared for his life, because he believed there was a God protecting him. The same happened with Muhammad who confidently sent guards away after revelation. However, since Hamza continued with his claim, considering this as a pass seems fair.
• Criterion 5 (Wide reach of message): FAIL. Hamza Ibn Ali failed to spread his message even though he initially set out to (4). If one is to say that the message couldn’t spread because of persecution, well, the same persecution occurred for Judaism, Christianity and Islam, and yet, these messages spread everywhere despite everything.

It’s extremely unlikely that the Druze faith is a communication from a judging and fair God. Its founder fails a combination of some important criteria.
Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: ...Indeed, in his epistles, Hamza is critical of his colleague, both for al-Darzi's disputing Hamza's role as the leader of their movement, as well as for his followers' over-zealous, extremist and provocative actions, which revealed the movement's ideas prematurely and placed it under danger of attack... During this time, the followers of the rival leaders engaged in regular brawls in the streets of Cairo, cursing one another as infidels.
(2) From Britannica: ...Almost nothing is known of his life before he entered Egypt in 1017. He became a spokesman for the religious convictions of the Fāṭimid caliph al-Ḥākim (the Fāṭimids were the ruling dynasty in Egypt), who was already accorded the position of imām, a divinely appointed and authoritative spokesman for Islam...
(3) From Wikipedia: ...According to the medieval chroniclers, he too enjoyed signs of favour from al-Hakim: when he complained to the Caliph that his life was in danger, he was given weapons, which he demonstratively hung on every entrance to the Raydan Mosque...
(4) From Britannica: ...Considerable resistance to these doctrines appeared when they were first preached in 1017, and Ḥamzah went into hiding until 1019, when al-Ḥākim was able to move vigorously to support the new religious movement... Ḥamzah claimed to be representing not just another sect but rather an independent religion, one that superseded traditional Islam. Al-Ḥākim disappeared in mysterious circumstances in 1021, and, much persecuted, the Druze cult all but ceased to exist in Egypt...

Mormonism

Let’s analyze Mormonism:

• Criterion 1 (Living religion): PASS.
• Criterion 2 (Warning of judgement): PASS. Mormonism is built on top of Christianity and Judaism, to which it delegates a vast chunk of knowledge. Consequently, I’ll give it a pass here.
• Criterion 3 (Universality): FAIL. It is far from being universal. If it was God’s way to bring Christianity to its rightful state, the least we can say is that it didn’t happen. Most of Mormons are still in Utah (U.S state), where they went after Smith was killed.
• Criterion 4 (Past reference): PASS. Mormonism references both Christianity and Judaism. This makes it pass this criterion, however, the fact that it doesn’t reference Islam is problematic for its worldview.
• Criterion 5 (Alignment with reality): FAIL. Being based on Christianity, Mormonism inherits some of the same issues. It corrects some, but also introduces some of its own. For example, Mormonism states that there are three separate divine entities, God the father, Jesus Christ and the holy spirit. They’re not three in one, as Christianity says. This doesn’t solve the issue of sacrificing one divine entity for the sins of humans while still judging them. It only adds complexity. Are these Gods equal? What if they don’t agree on something? This also goes against Judaism, which Mormonism references, and with Judaism comes the whole legacy of monotheism! Mormonism corrects the idea that salvation only depends on accepting Jesus as savior. It adds the fact that deeds play a role, which is fair.

Now let's analyze Joseph Smith, the founder of Mormonism.

• Criterion 1 (Impeccable social reputation): FAIL. Smith’s reputation was less than stellar (1). His treasure hunting profession isn’t exactly the most honest of professions. Also, eloping to marry his wife, attempting to marry already married women, escaping justice, dying in a shoot-out with the mob...
• Criterion 2 (Non-involvement rule): FAIL. He fails the non-involvement rule on many accounts. He was heavily involved with public religious activity and even magic, in a place and time where religious revivalism thrived (2).
• Criterion 3 (Sudden self-produced life direction change): FAIL. Supposedly receiving revelation in 1823 via the angel he called Moroni, didn’t surprise him, nor seemed to have much effect on his life direction. He continued treasure seeking using questionable methods and leading the same life.
• Criterion 4 (Complete devotion): PASS. Smith was extremely devoted to his cause. He never gave up until the end!
• Criterion 5 (Wide reach of message): FAIL. If Mormonism was God’s way to bring back Christianity to its rightful state, then the mission simply failed. It seems like Christianity enjoys far more universality than Mormonism. In this regard, Smith failed his mission, as most of the followers of the religion are still based where their ancestors ended up after the death of Smith.

Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: ...Meanwhile, the Smith family faced financial hardship... Family members supplemented their meager farm income by hiring out for odd jobs and working as treasure seekers, a type of magical supernaturalism common during the period. Smith was said to have an ability to locate lost items by looking into a seer stone, which he also used in treasure hunting, including, beginning in 1825, several unsuccessful attempts to find buried treasure sponsored by Josiah Stowell, a wealthy farmer in Chenango County, New York. In 1826, Smith was brought before a Chenango County court for "glass-looking", or pretending to find lost treasure; Stowell's relatives accused Smith of tricking Stowell and faking an ability to perceive hidden treasure... Although Smith had abandoned treasure hunting, his former associates believed he had double crossed them and had taken the golden plates for himself, property they believed should be jointly shared. After they ransacked places where they believed the plates might be hidden, Smith decided to leave Palmyra
(2) From Wikipedia: The region was a hotbed of religious enthusiasm during the Second Great Awakening. Between 1817 and 1825, there were several camp meetings and revivals in the Palmyra area… Smith said that he became interested in religion by age 12… With other family members, Smith also engaged in religious folk magic, which was a relatively common practice in that time and place…

Baha'i Faith

• Criterion 1 (Living religion): PASS.
• Criterion 2 (Warning of judgement): UNKNOWN. Baha’i Faith claims to be a unification of all the major religions. The issue is that some of the religions it references speak of judgment, like Judaism, Christianity and Islam, while others don’t, like Buddhism and Hinduism. While Baha’i Faith speaks of a day of judgment, it doesn’t seem to view it in the same way. It speaks of deeds being judged, but not according to each religion’s standards, rather, according to Baha’i Faith’s standards, which I have failed to find after multiple searches. If the conditions of success and failure aren’t clear, the God of Baha’i Faith cannot possibly be fair. I’ll mark this as unknown, but it’s actually closer to a failure.
• Criterion 3 (Universality): FAIL. In theory, Baha’i Faith should be universal, as it calls for the unification of all the major religions. It attempts to please everyone, but even while doing so, its numbers remain low, and is mostly unknown.
• Criterion 4 (Past reference): FAIL. Baha’i Faith references all major religions, but not as past instances of communication. It essentially claims that there is only one religion, and that the major religions were manifestations of God, but don’t necessarily represent said unique religion correctly. It references all major religions only to change their core beliefs in order to achieve unification. Said another way, this One God, has left people to be duped by false religions since the start, and only thanks to Baháʼu'lláh in the 1800s, did he think to show the truth to people. What about those who died long before Baháʼu'lláh was even born, and who followed Buddhism for example without ever believing a God existed?
• Criterion 5 (Alignment with reality): FAIL. This is a big failure. Baha’i Faith doesn’t make much sense, to the point of being revolting, to me at least! It attempts to be everything to everyone. Its founder claims to be Christ returned for Christians, the second coming of Jesus for Sunni Muslims, the Imam Husayn for Shi’a Muslims, the reincarnation of Krishna for Hindus, and the fifth Buddha for Buddhists. Never mind what each one of these symbols means in the context of its own religion, it just takes the concept and runs with it. It disregards most of what is associated with these symbols, it only needs its acknowledged existence. Let’s not forget that most of these religions do not agree with each other! It attempts to reconcile worldviews that are incompatible with each other. It picks and chooses what it wants from each major religion and disregards the rest.

Now let's analyze Baháʼu'lláh, the founder of Baha'i Faith.

• Criterion 1 (Impeccable social reputation): PASS. Coming from a wealthy family, he was known to give considerable amounts of time and money to charity.
• Criterion 2 (Non-involvement rule): FAIL. The founder of Baha’i Faith, Baháʼu'lláh, as well as the founder of Bábism, Siyyid Ali Muhammad, known as the Báb, and who laid the foundation for Baha’i Faith, both fail the non-involvement rule. They were both heavily involved in public religious matters before and at the time of their claims (1) (2). We are not talking about regular religious people going about their day, then making an exceptional claim out of nowhere, no! It’s practically the same scenario every time: a person is deeply involved with religious matters, or actively pursuing a profession or an interest, which leads them either by opportunity or by delusion to their claim. It’s the same here!
• Criterion 3 (Sudden self-produced life direction change): FAIL. Baháʼu'lláh had already set the course of his life and was already deeply involved in religious matters before he supposedly received his first divine revelation, which was in prison. From then on, not much had changed.
• Criterion 4 (Complete devotion): PASS. He stood by his claim and spent most of his life in prison. It’s important to note though that he wasn’t initially imprisoned because of his claim. Rather, it was because of his involvement with Bábism.
• Criterion 5 (Wide reach of message): FAIL. If Baháʼu'lláh was sent by the one and only God in order to unify all major religions, such unification hasn’t happened successfully.

It's highly unlikely that Baha'i Faith is a communication from a judging and fair God.
Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: Some of his earlier writings suggest that he did not enjoy the business and instead applied himself to the study of religious literature… He was constantly absorbed in his own thoughts, and was preoccupied with repetition of his prayers and verses… In 1841 the Báb went on pilgrimage to Iraq, and for seven months stayed mostly in and around Karbala. There he attended lectures of Kazim Rashti and became his follower… As of his death in December 1843, Kazim Rashti counseled his followers to leave their homes to seek the Mahdi, who, according to his prophecies, would soon appear. One of these followers, Mullá Husayn, after keeping vigil for 40 days in a mosque, traveled to Shiraz, where he met the Báb…
(2) From Wikipedia: Soon after declaring his spiritual mission to Mullá Husayn, the Báb sent him to Tehran to deliver a special tablet to one whom God would guide him to. After learning about Baháʼu'lláh through an acquaintance, Mullá Husayn felt compelled to arrange for Baháʼu'lláh to receive the tablet—this news brought great joy to the Báb when Mullá Husayn wrote to him about it…

Summary

After analyzing all the religions, the ones that are highly likely to be communications from a judging and fair God if one exists, are Judaism, Christianity and Islam. They are the only religions that satisfy most of the criteria. In fact, their founders are the ONLY ones who satisfy all the criteria, specifically the criterion of non-involvement prior to their claim of a contact with a God. All the other founders were involved in one way or another, making their claim a possible result of either fraud or delusion.
It is important to note though: we haven't proven that a judging and fair God exists, and we haven't proven that these religions are actually communications from him, not at all. All we did was to reasonably prove that if a judging and fair God exists, then Judaism, Christianity and Islam are highly likely to be communications from him.
In the next post, we will continue our research and see how we can reasonably prove that a judging and fair God exists.
Until next time!

Long story short.
Me and my ex started of casually seeing each other. We could openly speak to each other comfortably. We dated once and remained friends after. Then got into a situationship ( I didn't know about this and was considering it as dating).
Then a conversation happened - he wanted consistency from my side ( because I was going on dates with other guys in the period when me and my ex had broken up and were just friends). So, I promised him I'd stop dating and focus on us - and I did with my whole heart. Wanted the best for him and he was a bit taken aback by how emotionaly invested and intimate I was with him. I never ever considered another guy when I was with my ex.
Fast forward, 2 months and he breaks-up with me. On the day after breakup I was almost begging him to meet me and that I could fly to his city for just sitting and talking. He refused in haste. In the following months I realised he was texting a girl he met on a dating app and that he was going out on a date with her - the very evening that I was requesting him to meet me. I never knew this and felt quite cheated.
I fought with him and cried - I felt very cheated . And he said we were not technically dating - neither of us labelled it anything and he didn't want to label it as dating. But we did everything 2 people would do while dating - the intimacy and sex and talking and travelling together and cooking and music and what not. So I can only call whatever we did the second time round as a situationship- because we didn't label it( I didn't want to push him by asking what are we, because he was also not sure what to label and we had known each other for only 6 months)
1.5 years have gone by - I kept in touch with him very sporadically. Then cut of contact for 2 months. He moved countries and made career moves that I had supported him to make back when we were together. We had platonic conversation and I said I was happy he was in a solid relationship with his current girlfriend ( the girl he was seeing just before breaking up with me)- he blurted out , in a confession almost, that his girlfriend cheated on him 2 months before he moved countries. I was shell -shocked. They are currently going to therapy and fixing things - he seems to try to make it work.
I don't know if I want to be with him again but I do cry when I think about the times back when we were together. I feel like I lost something crucial - I have realised my value systems are a bit ..wonky(?). I was talking to my best friend and she told me frankly that I was more sorted as a person before and during my relationship with my ex - but then of late I seem very confused and sometimes hung up on him ( unexpected after 1.5 years). I do feel a lot lost, what did I do wrong and how can I get back on track so I can find love again.
I have started going on dates. But everything seems sooo "not like before. Not like how it started with my ex when we initially met and dated". I for one did not see my ex happening at all - it just happened so seamlessly and fast.
There's no light-heartedness or levity to the whole dating process currently. I'm kinda becoming apathetic to the whole finding love thing - and I don't want to be that. I want to marry someday and have kids with a man who'll be my rock and I his. I want to feel that deep connection again, and it's just not happening - it's stressing me out. I cry sometimes imagining a situation if my ex comes back - would I take him back? If he ever does that is.
After having gone on several dates now, I am almost convinced that I have to accept the dreadfull situation of never finding someone I'll have the kind of connection that I had with my ex. The safety, warmth and childish fun and endless conversation that did not seem forced, travelling , support etc etc.
For context - I'm based in India. I grew up a bit sheltered and was a late bloomer of sorts. So my ex was my first serious shot at a relationship for me. I sometimes wonder if it was the good sex that got me close to him but no, I just valued being able to completely be myself around him and liked being in his arms.
And now, I can't even fathom having that closeness with any new guy. Hell, some of my dates , I physically just flinched or couldn't get close to, or did not like their smell or something or the other. How will I ever find someone, dear lord!!

Any and all feedback would be appreciated.
PROLOGUE:
“When the world was lit aflame by this meat grinder of a conflict I looked to you for understanding, I, in my obligation, was sent to cleanse the flames, As to fill my hollowness with the great steam clouds, You answered back, You, in your obligation, were sent to further expand the flames, As to fill your hollowness with the ash, And yet, Neither of us still feel complete, You are wrecked, remnants, And I, have cause unfathomable damage in my efforts, ‘O murdeur ‘o mine, How different are you and I?”
The last paragraph in the novel, ‘Orange fields’ recovered by clean up crews in the Eastern African front during the Sol-War, each page had to be scanned meticulously so as to recognize the chemical weaponry stained pages. The side of which the author was on is still unknown, and yet, many would like to keep it that way.
2153, a year so distant yet so predictable, corporate power rising, spineless governments, weak and unarmed civilians and hot zones becoming more and more normal and recurring; with those same governments bowing to the corporations that demand to squeeze all the profit out of those same hot zones with those same cannon fodder civilians.
“We would like to personally thank you for your service here today, your bravery and sacrifice will not go unheard, this is your chance to take back one of the world's crowning achievements, the democratic republic of congo’s ‘zenith’ medical facility; as New MPLA forces have decided to overthrow the current government, this will be the first of many ops to be enacted that will take back this beautiful land.” This ‘heart warming’ speech, presented by a vanilla UN representative was echoed throughout the interior of the troop transport airship, each soldier situated on their standardised metal seat looking down in a melancholy manner at the damp flooring. Jason Kazamai followed along, except he wasn’t acknowledging the speech whatsoever, it was all background noise, alongside the background smell of muddy and sweaty soldiers who had been picked up from a previous battle. Seeing their disgruntled look and, some, torn off limbs set a heavy precedent that these New MPLA don’t mess around; and this being atop Jason’s already, rash and most certainly unwise decision to enlist made his muscles tense to a rubber band being stretched to its fullest level of fragility. He let his rifle, the default UN service rifle, flow down onto the floor, letting its sling, which was now a, almost, car seat belt type system integrated into their ballistic vest, weigh his chest down, making that usual metaphorical feeling, real.
The speech went on for a little while longer, before cutting to a noticeably lower quality news broadcast likely filmed in some warehouse some UN employee had spare. The presenter took a few short seconds staring at the camera before he noticed it was on. “In news today, New MPLA forces have decided to show their tolerance to those who go against their new communist ideology, they have sent out videos of them maiming and executing civilians who had taken part in the Kinshasa protest. And although all governments in the UN haven’t responded, internally they have all decided to band together ‘peace forging’ groups to settle down the New MPLA; yet due to its illegality their presence haven’t been allowed to pass through news and social media filters.” Jason toyed with a little string coming off of his dryland camo shirt.
“Our last story of today covers the recent Gunblade situation regarding the UN peace forging groups, as tensions rise with the Gunblade UECs and their confrontation over not being given the contract to send their own troops into the DRC; with Vale himself in a meeting apparently cursing at a UN representative and leaving the hall. More updates will be given as they arise.” The troop transport ship made a hefty metal slamming noise, causing a few soldiers to slide down their rows of seats. “The hell was that?” A soldier shouted. Rapid pinging noises sprinkled along the outside of the walls of the ship, like metallic rain. The instant the crew in the cockpit realised the situation the ship went into a lockdown, with all doors sealing tight and the ships internals becoming padded and secured; and for extra measure all lights had turned to a red to coincide with the alarm that was going off. Jason was struck up by the seering sound of the alarm and had his back pressed fully against the back of his seat. In an act of comfort he grabbed the barrel of his rifle, trying his hardest to regulate his breathing. The sounds had stopped for a short while. The undying echo of silence filling the void as everyone awaited the sound of whether they’d be able to return home
“NO!” To coincide with the sound of a blistering missile attack, a gaping hole erupted in the side of the troop transport ship, three soldiers were instantly sucked out of the ship and into the desolate drylands. With the still blaring sound of the alarms the pilot spoke over the comms and to the nearest UN FOB in DRC, “This is NOVA-BRAGA 12 we are being attacked by UFOS I repeat this is NOVA-BRAGA 12 we are being attacked by UFOS, if there are any UN allies in the area please respond, I beg!”
Jason dug his fingernails into the small leather armrest in the seat so as to not be taken into the afterlife by the scorching hole just opposite himself. The troop transport ship wrestled to find the attacker, sending out recon virus to infiltrate the attackers vehicles and spraying in all kinds of directions their small guns. But it was all futile.
The pilot talked to the still remaining troops within the ship, “I repeat to all still living soldiers to f-follow procedures and, uh, to hold on to whatever you can, we are going to try and land in the nearest forest!” The pilot started to try and diverge most power into the barely functioning thrusters for the ship. All within started to struggle to breathe as all the air filters and cyclers were failing at a rapid pace. Jason grasped his own mouth with intense force as sickening chemicals from the burrowed servers below the floor of the ship started to leak upwards. Many soldiers did not do the same, some didn’t realise it was even there and some thought of it as some saving gas designed to help them in some way; but once they inhaled it in a matter of seconds their lungs were scorched and their throats turned into tunnels of visceral pain. The gas ever so gently passed by Jason, and he started to slip down his seat so as to not get even touched by it.
“Almost there-” The pilot sent out a blistering cry as he was turned to nothing but charred remains as another, even more powerful missile was sent out at the ship. The ship spun right as it started to fall without power towards the ground. Jason held on tightly to the metal, trying so hard to dig his fingers into the packed steel. All other soldiers were trying the same, except all screaming, crying and the likes, whilst Jason stayed silent, there was nothing else his mind could think of to do. He let out a whimper and spoke, “Please.” Before bracing for impact against the drylands.
He awoke to the sight of a head split in two, brain matter spilled along the muddy terrain and skull splinters sticking out from the ground; Jason stared at the body for a few minutes, not sure whether that corpse was himself and he was looking at himself as a ghost. He looked down, he was lodged a few inches deep into the mud, he shuffled himself around to release himself. He gasped for air as a searing pain erupted from both of his legs as he tried to move around, yet still he continued to move around, surveying the area for an escape. The ship had been torn into many large pieces which kept most of the bodies of the soldiers within making it look like they had been placed into a blender and now great fires started outside cooking them from within. A mountain of bodies laid atop one-another in the centre of the ship wreckage. A faint siren was still ongoing just in the blurry distance. Jason grabbed a nearby shard of metal and pulled himself out of the mud, he further gasped for air searching for small pockets of uncontaminated air. He lay for a few minutes, trying to gather his thoughts again. It had all happened too quickly.
He dragged himself across the terrain, passing by chunks of flesh and bone; he was in too much distress to absorb the horrors before himself. He paused in his tracks as he heard distant shots, a shadow of a standing soldier aiming a rifle at a body displayed itself off of one of the ship fragments, he fired three rounds into the likely already dead body. Jason could ever-so slightly hear muffled comms chatter, with the fire and clouded thoughts in his mind making it more difficult to do so.
The soldier finished off verifying the bodies, “No sign of the Heir.” “Keep looking, those calculations were on point he should be breathing at the very least.” The soldier reloaded his rifle, a heavily modified D4M assault rifle. A shining star of Gunblade with its on-the-fly part removal system. The soldier then, with around two others following him, passed by the shard of the ship in which his shadow was just displayed. At this point Jason had retreated backwards to where he originally was laying at, he was aiming to go beyond the ship fragment situated behind this location and then… Escape?
A few more shots were fired as the soldiers encroached to Jason’s position, they were now tired of waiting around and only took a quarter-of-a-second before dumping a few shots into a body. Jason saw just a small metre before him a pistol, and in a stark flash of feeling heroic, Jason went for the weapon; thinking to himself how he was going to be able to take down these heavily armed and skilled soldiers with a simple 9mm. As he got closer and closer to the pistol, the stench of corpses and the sound of gunfire came closer and closer. Jason hurried as fast as he could do so with his injuries to the weapon.
As he thrust forward his hand to grab the pistol, it was kicked aside by one of the soldiers, who, as soon as he aimed the rifle at Jasons dome, put down the weapon and in a hurry bent down to grab him by the throat; the soldier was dressed in all black with a sort of mage-looking cloak that went down to his shins. Although Jason didn’t intake this first, as his helm was far more of a prolific sight. A Gunblade info helm. Advanced helmets, with swanky breathing ports located just where the mouth is going up to the nose, and audio devices placed in the ears and in all of the other space being heavy ballistic glass, with going down the middle to the breather being a ingrained black parting line. The soldier held Jason up with a firm grip like Jason was a child, he stared at him for a while before speaking, “Heir secure.” The voice was digitized and muffled, yet still translatable. The soldier had scanned Jason’s head structure and other small details.
After the soldier had confirmed Jasons capturing, the op leader spoke back, “Good, good, extraction is out in two minutes, excellent work today, three birds with one stone, or missile really…” The other soldiers started speaking to the op leader, trying to get a promotion by playing nice to him. “What are the birds then?” “Well, of course we got our target, but then we also got a good cover story for why we should be sent into the DRC, the UN having their 'skilled troops' massacred by B-tier terrorists isn't the greatest show of strength, and they'll be looking for a way to put this story into the ground, which of course will be us."

Hey guys, so I've been developing a non-photorealistic shader node group to use in Eevee shaders the last few days, and it's been mostly going good, but I've hit a roadblock with a particular effect I want to achieve.
So in the past to make this type of shader node group, I would do single-point lighting calculations myself inside the node group with some vector math, but I want to move past that since it means making several shaders for combinations of light colour & light direction, not to mention being limited to a single light source. For this shader node group, I wanted to finally figure out how to capture the influence of the lighting surrounding the surface to which a shader is applied and use that lighting information for the shader instead of the calculations I was doing entirely independent of the lighting in a scene the shader was used in.
The closest I could find to achieving this was the 'Shader to RGB' node, which for those unfamiliar, takes the result of a shader and approximates it back to RGB to map onto the screen as closely as possible with some minor exceptions given the challenges of developing such a node. This was fine enough for me as I could plug, for example, a 'Diffuse BSDF' node into this 'Shader to RGB' node and capture the influence of lighting surrounding my surface that way, using the 'Value' of the 'RGB' result of putting the shader through the 'Shader to RGB' node as a best-effort approximation of which areas of the surface are likely currently shrouded in shadow or otherwise.
In the context of the non-photorealistic shader I'm developing here, part of what I wanted to do was add anywhere from 0 to 0.5 to the 'Hue' of each pixel in the result of the 'Shader to RGB' node correlated to the inverse of the 0 to 1 value of the 'Value' of each pixel in the result of the 'Shader to RGB' node. That way, for example, pixels with a '0' for their 'Value' (i.e. pitch black) would have their hue shifted by '0.5', making them the opposite hue from what they used to be.
This worked out just fine for all pixels with values anywhere from 1 to an infinitely small amount above 0. However, a quirk I came to realize of the 'Diffuse BSDF' shader and all other built-in shaders (perhaps something even lower-level like the Eevee rendering engine) is that if a pixel has a 'Value' of '0', then the 'Hue' and 'Saturation' become naturally assumed as '0' also because a pixel with a 'Value' of '0' will look no different when altering that pixel's 'Hue' and/or 'Saturation' values. If you don't quite understand my issue, see the below video for a demonstration and give it another read:
https://files.catbox.moe/klfyl5.mp4
​
So, given all that context, here's my question (or rather, questions,) to you all:

1. Is there a way I can force the built-in shaders to not default all 'HSV' values to '0' when the 'V' part of that collection is '0'?
2. Failing that: Is there a better, more direct way I could be collecting the influence of the lighting surrounding the surface to which a shader is applied?

Now, to clear up the last posting requirement for this subreddit: I've tried Googling all this many times in the past since I enjoy making shaders that don't conform to what is realistically expected of them, but I can't find any solutions to my 2nd question in particular which is what lead me to the whole 'Shader to RGB' thing in the first place and then of course lead to the discovery that prompted my 1st question.
I'm on Blender 3.3 if it is of any interest, so if anyone out there can lend a hand I'd much appreciate it. Thank you!

The 3 basic parameters of hashtag #Valzubiriagenda:

1. We artists and everyone else can write and self-publish art- and artist-related books: memoirs, biographies, art books and art catalogs. Books are forever. Pamphlets and brochures are not books.
2. We announce a schedule of increasing prices of our art pieces, which includes quantities (scarcity numbers) per price point and overall (the total quantity of art pieces we might ever make). This helps art traders, art investors and art collectors speculate or even stop speculating and instead join a community of investors working together to hopefully skyrocket to the higher announced prices in a shorter span of time.
3. We can use the NFT world, because NFTs provide the tracking (who owns what) and trading.

We can also not be involved with NFTs. Stores and individuals can help sell art using online presence and our catalogs in the stores. If this trends, or once this trends, even expensive art can be sold by neighboring businesses, without exclusivity. Commission systems do not have to be standardized. Art investors can produce their own catalogs to leave at the cafés. Even the cafés can produce their own catalogs.
Valzubiriagenda NFTs
NFTs only came about a few years ago. But I had been working on this since the 1990s. I wrote a book, Valzubiriagenda, along with fellow artist Silverio Perez, and released it in 2018 (Amazon and elsewhere), tackling everything related to #1 & #2. We'll come up with #3 in a later book/ memoi marketing book.
Any artist, including tangible artists can release 10,000 NFTs if the artist chooses to do so. For tangible artists, the NFT first becomes an Art Commission Contract for sight unseen, yet-to-be made art. Once the art is made, the NFT becomes proof of ownership that the actual, tangible art is theirs.
Warehousing our tangible art
Another related idea is that the tangible art may be warehoused by the artist so that the NFT traders continue to trade. This means that even 10-ton 10-foot tall sculptures can be owned and traded by anyone without worrying about shipping, reshipping, scratches, smudges, parts breaking off, etc. The newness of the pieces remain because they are stored by the artist, source, gallery, etc. The art piece gets shipped to the art collector, the ultimate owner.
An artist who makes ceramic coffee mugs - smaller art pieces, can release 10,000 NFTs with a schedule of increasing prices so that NFT traders can trade immediately. The 10,000 coffee mugs can get damaged, so as they are made, they continue to be stored by the artist, until the time when art collectors decide to have the art pieces shipped to them.
Why only now?
I decided to write as many book-length memoirs as I can before I came out to promote this.
I'm an artist and an author. Both need time to "master." I would not even fully use "master" on myself, because there's always something new, even to my own art, my own writing and publishing.

I am now claiming that I'm the visual artist who has produced the most artist memoirs in the world. I have 5 on Amazon. I count Valzubiriagenda as both a marketing book and a memoir-of-sorts, because it has a lot of my own life lessons on writing and publishing. I would not care to contest my claim of having the most memoirs. I will release 5 more over the next 3 years.

BARTER! Get help to write, photograph art and publish your books!
Anyone can hire 11 ghostwriters for 11 memoirs. If you can make art, but you cannot write, then barter your forever art with those who can help you produce forever books.
I don't feel the pressure of writing and publishing because I feel my focus should be on art students and art experts who would study my art and my books 100 years from now. Don't expect relatives and friends to read your books.
I call myself the Dollman
For my NFTs, I am proposing to make dioramas - my original, costumed, bejeweled porcelain dolls in backdrops that will also have precious metals and gemstones. This way I can incorporate precious metals and gemstones in my work, to make sure that people perceive my art as expensive, just in case I myself don't become "famous" - there's no need to get world famous. We are artists and all we need to do is to satisfy the art niche.
Use your laptop now!
I will encourage you to start writing your book-length memoir. Write, Edit and then Self-publish it. Get help. Why wait a hundred years for someone to write about you when all you need is a laptop and a nearby coffee shop.
Don't start counting chickens before the eggs hatch. I have encountered a lot of would-be writers who immediately see themselves as bestselling. world famous assets to society. Two even wanted me to sign NDAs (Nondisclosure agreements), because they did not want me to steal their book ideas.
Here's a suggestion. I would not personally do it. From one manuscript can come 2 books: The Original Draft (unedited, with misspellings, considered to be an art piece, scanned pages(?) of your handwritten original effort), and The Final Edition (edited).
PROVENANCE!
Another way to enhance our investability, tradability and collectability is PROVENANCE - how art ownership proceeds through time. The way this can be done is also through publishing books. Everyone can write their memoirs, biographies, art books and art catalogs, including traders, investors and art collectors. In effect, we artists can continue to be included or mentioned in even more books, without any additional effort by us.
You as an investor, reseller, trader, art collector should be able to publish a catalog with 250 works by 250 different artists, but they need to agree to this right from the start - it's your money, you should require them to follow your version of the hashtag #valzubiriagenda parameters, which preferably should include permission for you to publish their art. Why would you track down 250 artists later?
No exclusive contracts
If you're a café, you can call for artists, and come up with a book with for example, 30 artists, with a chapter devoted to each artist's profile and images of the artist's art.
You can distribute your catalogs to businesses and individuals near and far and online.
The book Valzubiriagenda even cites that funeral homes and janitors closets can sell art, with or without exclusivity. Airline catalogs can include million dollar art pieces. Car manufacturers, showrooms and even car repair shops can sell art as well. Everyone should be able to do this, anywhere in the world, especially not just because of the pandemic, but right now, we are in really bad economies.
What's with the name #Valzubiriagenda
I was into conspiracy theories in 2018, and this term, "The Mandela Effect," was popular. I had read many times that an artist coined the term, but I had to research online, for her name, many times, before remembering it. I'm not good at remembering names. It took me a year and a half to finally tell you that Fiona Broome coined "The Mandela Effect."
I also thought I might have to research trademarks and copyrights just to come up with a generic name. So I decided on "Valzubiriagenda." I was not really sure at first, but I decided to use it as the title for my book (with co-authoartist Silverio Perez) so that there would be no turning back and I can move on.
Am I a FUTURIST?
Someone I recently met this May 2022 just called me a futurist.
In the 1990s, I proposed to a pension fund that they can raise billions of dollars, especially for emergencies, or as needed, or out of desperation, if the pension fund purchases a quantity of art from an artist who not only has a current, reasonable price, but an announced future price that the artist wants to reach.
That future price would obviously be higher than the current price. The art commission contract for multiple art pieces can be taken to the fund's financial lender for a loan. The higher future price can be used for financing purposes.
The pension fund's treasurer, a publicly elected official, said this idea might work, but we had to keep this a secret and discuss this some more, because other pension funds might copy and do this prematurely. This idea had to come from the two of us. The treasurer needed his votes and I needed credentials.
Added into the pot was my idea that I, as the artist, will also write one book-length artist memoir. This was and still is a strong factor, because the leadership and marketing books I had read then mentioned a strong tip. If you want to advance in your field, write a full-length book that is related to the field.
Unfortunately, the elected official, the treasurer of the pension fund, who was also a friend, passed away - he was old and had ailments. At that point in time, I cannot just approach another pension fund treasurer to share this idea with.
I realized I had to write a few memoirs. I needed to set an example for other artists, so I needed to write more than one memoir. Then I felt I should also make ready another book - the how-to of what I'm up to. I wrote Valzubiriagenda, which was a memoir of sorts. I knew how long it would take me to write a book, so I had to make sure I can also consider this book a memoir.
In 2008, I imagined that someone like Bernie Madoff, or a fund like Lehman Brothers, would be desperate enough to use this to save themselves and their companies. I was not ready. I had only written 1 manuscript for a memoir.
In 2012, I released Dollman the Musical, A Memoir of an Artist as a Dollmaker. Once again, I was not ready because writing it depressed me a little, and I knew I had to write more.
In 2014, I released 3 memoirs, and re-released Dollman the Musical. Besides releasing regular books, I released special editions of the 4 books, which had a "Special Secret Insert for Bankers," which explains my ideas of an announced schedule of exponentially increasing prices, to satisfy investors, and the publication of artist memoirs, to satisfy art collectors.
In 2014, I also issued out a press release. Google "Can Billion Dollar Artist Save Investors and World Economy Valentino Zubiri PRWeb August 19 2014" and you will see the press release.
What I did was stake a claim on my ideas. I did not promote my books and the press release. I just wanted them to stay online, like a sleeping giant or a dormant volcano. I even designed 3 of the book covers to look like indie books from the 1980s. I was planting the seeds, thinking they will eventually grow and bear fruit in the future.
In 2015, I was interviewed by Richard Syrett, about one of my memoirs, Hocus Pocus Lately. This book is my memoir with paranormal stories. I could have pursued promoting my paranormal stories, but I wanted to be known first as a visual artist and memoirist, so I allowed myself one interview related to Hocus Pocus Lately. Richard Syrett has(had?) his own syndicated radio show, The Conspiracy Show with Richard Syrett, about the paranormal. He also guest hosts on Coast to Coast AM, another internationally syndicated show about the paranormal.
In 2018, I released Valzubiriagenda (co-authored by artist Silverio Perez, a fellow artist). Finally, this book is "the how-to of what I'm to."
I'm going to end this with some strangeness. In 1986, a lady at a religious gathering went into a trance and left a good number of messages. Supposedly, anyone who got into a trance would have messages, but once the trance was over, the person would not remember what was said.
I was not part of the group, but the lady turned her head to face me. She "foretold" that whatever I would decide to do in the future, it will take time, but it will be the right thing. This is one of my stories in one of my memoirs, Hocus Pocus Lately.
The Tulipmania of 1634-37
I discovered that there was this incident of rare tulips becoming collectible during the Dutch Golden Age. There were tulips so rare and so well-desired that their prices equaled to that of a house. You can read more about this online (Wikipedia) or watch a few YouTube videos about it.
Here is the most useful idea that I gleaned from the Tulipmania. The tulip bulbs remained safe inside nurseries. The traders were carrying the deeds of ownership to the tulip bulbs.
Then NFTs came to the forefront
I started learning PHP, an HTML scripting language, and MySQL, the database that PHP can connect to in the background, in 1999, when there were only 3 books about PHP and MySQL at the bookstores.
By 2014, I was trying to figure out how to make the "ledger," or database that can be used to update ownership and who can be contacted. If we are trading art, then the art ownership should be updated.
Then NFTs came about. This can be used as our ledger. Everyone can immediately trade NFTs of future, yet-to-be made art pieces, especially because it takes time to make tangible art.
NFTs actually went a step ahead, by allowing digital art to be traded.
The only setback with NFTs, in my opinion, is that it still lacks a commission system for resellers and representatives.
For example, if a café wants to represent me, then they can promote me at their café and on their online pages. If I make one piece of art that will be exclusively represented by a gallery, then that commission will be different and more specific. As ownership is transferred, the subsequent owners should be able to reset the commission. We should also have the option of giving commissions to hundreds of representatives at one time with different percentages if need be.
The recent crypto crash
Lately, we have observed that NFTs and cryptocurrencies have been behaving like the stock market and other markets. They have been fluctuating.
I believe that it is time for a trend which discourages fluctuation of prices.
I have also seen YouTube videos where social influencers are encouraging us to be on the lookout for exponentially profitable ventures, because we have all seen this happen with the exponential increase of Bitcoin and Ethereum.
Let's see if #Valzubiriagenda trends
We can announce present and future art prices. The galleries won't do this (yet?) because they follow a more traditional approach to the business of art.
We have a choice of using incrementally or exponentially increasing prices. We still reserve the right to change things in the future, so everyone should know to follow the latest update.
If this trends, if you as an artist simply announces that you will write an artist memoir, or that you will include the future works in future art books, you might have more art traders, investors and collectors approaching you.
Get your pen, paper and calculator
Imagine yourself as an artist, where you are right now. Let's just say you still do not have a book about yourself and your art yet. Imagine now that you have a memoir out there. Don't you think it makes sense to charge more than what you are charging now? Writing and publishing books is just the beginning. I'm just standardizing this approach. The books also say to do other related projects. In my case, getting Dollman the Musical onstage is one idea. You will have other related projects, but the publication of memoirs, biographies, art books and art catalogs will help all of us.
You can also imagine that a law firm that has meeting rooms, with someone who wants to form a local #valzubiriagenda group, can have meetings. A local café can do the same. Local photographers for your art, writers, editors, book designers, proofreaders and others can join in.
I suggest have printed books to share. 15 copies of your memoir or art books will be better than an e-reader or laptop or your phone to show. These gadgets can be stolen, sabotaged, broken, have coffee spilled on them, etc. 15 printed books means simultaneously showing to 15 people. You can even give them away to potential resellers, investors, traders and collectors.
When it rains, it pours, as in the days of Noah
There's a saying, "When it rains, it pours." There is a negative interpretation and a positive interpretation.
Negative: When trouble comes, they cascade to even more.
Positive: When opportunity comes knocking, more follow suit. We can assume that if one gets our art because of #valzubiriagenda, more want to do it now, because of the rising prices, and FOMO - fear of missing out. What will they lose if they miss the boat?
As I have said earlier, if the #valzubiriagenda trends, if you announce a future memoir or art catalog, you might have an increase of investors, traders and art collectors who would want to check you out. You might encourage more sales. Just remember to write and publish that memoir and art catalog.
There's this saying, "As in the days of Noah." Imagine Noah, building his ark, with members of his own family, putting all his time and effort into it. Noah was a nice guy. I'm sure every once in a while a neighbor offered him coffee, or chai latte, or whatever refreshing drink they might have back then.
Here's the lesson to be learned. Just because they offered him some type of bubble tea drink, or coca cola, they still didn't make it to the ark. Rubbing shoulders with actors does not make you an actor. I have told my artist friends to write their memoirs. They told me that once they see me succeed, after all these many years of seeing my seemingly useless efforts, then they will write their memoirs and follow the road that I had paved for them.
Good luck to them, but if I were you, act now, get my art or make art. Support the 5-year old artist whose parent promised to release a comprehensive art catalog. If you get that 5-year old's art, and mine, I would be honored to be in the same art catalog that you will produce. I'm already successful at that point. You have gotten the mission just right.
I have already claimed to have written the most book-length artist memoirs in the world. Dethrone that claim. Barter. Use ghostwriters. Success to me means facing God one day and saying, I wrote my memoirs and left the world a legacy of books and art. I will not tell God, smiling and proudly, that I encouraged a run for my art by announcing a schedule of exponentially increasing prices that reached 9 figures. I'm sure God knows we had fun.

JOIN THIS GROUP

If you want to try out #valzubiriagenda, in any capacity, join this group. Let others know about this group as well.
If you are an artist, you can let everyone know here that you will produce your memoir, art catalogs, etc. It's okay if you don't know how to go about publishing yet, I will discuss this. Please be honorable enough to produce what you promise to produce.
If you want to meet fellow artists, investors, resellers, etc., join us here.
If you are a book writer, editor, proofreader; if you can photograph art pieces; if you are a book designer, etc., join us here. Let us know if you charge, barter for art, or both.
If you have your own tips and knowledge to share, join us here.
If you have underaged artists you are managing (parents, etc.) join us here.
Join this group if you want to sell works. Post your works. You web links. I'm sure I will.
You can announce meetings in your area. You might have meeting rooms, a café, restaurant, etc. where people can meet. In the future, you can have the regular show and tell, where books can be shown and shared.
​
Thanks for reading. Please let me know if I need to edit some parts. Please share and join this group. - Valentino Zubiri, Dollman, Artist, Memoirist
Underaged artists are welcome here, so please be mindful of your language. We cannot post your adult-oriented art pieces, but you can direct us to a separate page or community. There will be limits to your posts, and there will be adult-oriented art that we cannot allow to be posted.
Thanks for reading. Please let me know if I need to edit some parts. Please share and join this group. - Valentino Zubiri, Dollman, artist & memoirist

Hey EDC Exchange -
Thanks for checking out my post! Re-listing a few things with price drops and added a few new items for your perusal. I am the original owner on all items listed EXCEPT the RGT clip.
First, let’s look at that timestamp!
First, a VoxDesign “Dirty” Raccoon - 3/8” in brass. Purchased new from UrbanEDC in July of 2022. I have way too many of these “bottle openers” from VoxDesign, and this one has never been carried or used…it should go to someone who will appreciate it. Basically new condition. Includes original bag and card. Item was $165 new.
Video here.
Raccoon is SV: $140 $120 $100 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS. Final price drop on this before I just hang on to it.
Next up, a PNW Toast Co. Toast! This was purchased from UrbanEDC in June of 2021. This was an Urban EDC exclusive with a layer of Tiffany G10 sandwiched between Stabwood on one side and and Canvas Micarta on the other. Very cool little force multiplier, but I never ended up carrying it. Also purchased a brown Breadbox Slip (leather sheath) from Redeemed Creations that same month. Also never carried (although I did slip the toast in and out of it a few times, so it’s not “mint”). Toast includes original COA and paper bag wrapping. Item is like new. Toast was $189 new, sheath was $30.
Photos here.
Toast & Slip are SV: $200 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS.
Next, a Peak Eiger Ultra X in brass. Purchased directly from Peak in 2017, I’ve carried this a handful of times, but never really fell in love with the twisty style interface. This is the Hi-CRI version with narrow beam, includes the tail switch (momentary) and clip (which I think is a Preon clip, but I don’t actually remember…I did have to pick it up separately). Beam is lovely, light is in good shape. Runs off a 10440 Li-ion cell ONLY (not included). Light (without clip) was $85 new.
Photos here.
Peak is SV: $50 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS.
Next, a Ripp’s Garage Tech Polished Timascus clip for CRK. This came to me installed on a Large Inkosi I got on the Swap. I left it on, carried it twice, and decided it was just a touch too fancy for me. Removed the clip and it ended up in a drawer for a year or two, and was recently re-discovered. Clip is in good shape, although there are a couple very small spots on the left side of the clip that look like wear to me, I did my best to picture them. Otherwise, this is a great opportunity to set your CRK apart. These go for about $130 new, I believe.
Photos here.
RGT Clip is SV: $80 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS.
Next, an MXG Titanium Deep Carry clip for Spyderco knives. I got a couple clips from MXG trying to find a good match for my Swayback, this didn’t make the cut, but I liked the clip and kept thinking I’d find a home for it…never did. Time to move it on! It was very briefly installed on the Swayback, but never carried. It’s in essentially new condition. Originally $25.
Photo here.
MXG Clip is SV: $15 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS.
Then we’ve got a Tanner Goods Document Folio in black. I got this from a sample sale grab bag about 10 years ago and loved it, but wanted it in brown. So, promptly ordered the cognac version and put this one away. It’s doing nobody any good stashed away, so it’s time to let it go. It’s made from a single piece of 5.5 oz vegetable tanned Meridian English Bridle leather, with brass studs. Features a felted wool sleeve. Aside from the “S” stamp (see pictures) I can find nothing that differentiates this folio from the full-price one I purchased at the same time. The case measures 12” long by 9” wide. Tanner Goods doesn’t make these anymore, if you’re looking for an elegant way to transport your documents (or iPad), this is a damn fine way to do it. Originally sold for $200.
Photos here.
Folio is SV: $100 $60 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS.
Lastly, a Galway vertical snap wallet from Blackthorn Leather. I purchased this back in 2018 and carried it a half-dozen times. It’s a great wallet, I just prefer a “trucker wallet” style form factor. Construction is SOLID, the wallet feels bombproof. Wallet is in excellent condition. Item is constructed from hand-dyed, full-grain vegetable tanned leather and lined with plaid accent fabric. Measures 3.5” x 4.75” closed. The concho is a very well done reproduction Walking Liberty quarter (the coin collectors in your life will thank you). Item was $115 new.
Photos here.
Wallet is SV: $65 $50 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS. SOLD!!
FINALLY, the last item up for today is a Saddleback Leather - Large Satchel in Coffee Brown. Got this back in November of 2012 to replace a Large Briefcase that was too large. It was carried a bunch in an office environment, but was ultimately replaced by a Mountainback Large Satchel in 2016. The large satchel is no longer available (in fact, none of the bags I just mentioned are still available), so this is your chance to pick up this beautiful leather bag that is tired of living in my closet. I’m including an older Saddleback leather slip case. I’ve used it to carry iPhone/iPad chargers, but it can work for loads of different uses. Also including a set of two leather utility straps that Saddleback used to offer that I kept laced in the D-rings on the bottom of the bag (great for carrying a jacket or sweater).
Loads more information about the bag can be found via this review: https://bestleather.org/saddleback-leather-large-satchel-review-408/
Photos here.
Satchel was $350 new. SV is $240 via PayPal FF (no notes), shipped via USPS (I think, might need to go UPS). This is also available for local pick-up for $200 here in Southern California.
…and that’s all. Happy to entertain reasonable offers (or combine shipping), but I am definitely looking to sell (not trade). Thanks for looking and please feel free to reach out with any questions.

I can't keep quiet any longer. I have to tell the world the truth. I am being blackmailed. Recently a man/group threatened to severally harm me or kill me if I do not continue to give him more ideas to hurt people and the US government by using Mormonism as a coverup. I am refusing to do so, but he goes on threatening and I have no reason to believe he will give up except perhaps I bring this to light. I wish I had more evidence. I hate how the church breeds this kind of maliciousness. If I had known people of this degree of evil existed within the church I would have left a long time ago.
Their is a sub-cult of Mormons within the "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints" who planned and executed the Insurrection on the United States Capital by allying with other underground or terror groups such as The Proud Boys and manipulating all of them. To put it all as simply as possible, I was still a believing Mormon back in Jan 2019. However, a member confused me by shaking my hand in a strange way. He was new to the ward at the time and only just met him. Essentially he took me into an empty side room in the church and claimed the handshake was a secret he used in the military. However, he acted very odd about it and told me to not tell anyone. I didn't for many months. However, I had heard about secret handshakes in the temple and theorized that perhaps they are used as a secret non-verbal form of communication. Thus, I was convinced he had accidently used it on me. I can't explain all the details, but later I became convinced that the church was communicating with me non-verbally for some reason I did not know. So, I prayed to god and the answer was to find the bishop and tell him something (I will not say at this time what or why). However, our ward had been split into two and there were 2 bishops. I found the other wards bishop (because the other one wasn't available) after noon or so on one of the Sundays in Jan 2019 and shook his hand then we went into a side room. I don't recall everything we talked about. However, it turned out he had been released as bishop.
What followed was just unfathomable. First, when I told this released Bishop what I thought I was supposed to, I got called a liar. He gaslighted me to the point I apologized just to make him stop getting angry. Then we had this weird heart to heart thing talking about our lives. He told me he had been in the military and was about to move to Utah. He said he hated the US government for things he witnessed in Afghanistan. To change the subject I then told him I sometimes write books as a hobby and asked if he wanted to write a book. He initially said no, but later changed his mind as we continued to talk. But, as I started coming up with ideas for the book, he became angry again. I then allowed him to come up with ideas. He just seemed to have an easy trigger at getting angry. That was when he told me he had the crazy fantasy of doing an Insurrection. We started combining our ideas together. He somehow convinced me we were playing the bad guys in the story-as if we were roleplaying. So we made up a bunch of crazy ideas. He claimed he could make it all happen. I just took it as acting. The story involved a bunch of events before the second coming of Jesus Christ. MY original idea involved two men becoming Anti-Christ's and were going to cause all sorts of havoc across the earth. Things would get so bad because of a new war that Jesus would be the only one to stop it.
But, as things got worse and worse I became suspicious he MIGHT BE FOR REAL! What really triggered it all was he suddenly starting asking me what I wanted out of it all-as if we had been conspiring. When I said no, he became a little angry again(hope you see the trend). What followed next was this weird veiled set of threats. At the end he basically had threatened me to destroy my car (which he did) and send people after me to kill me if he was ever caught or if any of this didn't work- which is ambiguous in and of itself. This previous bishop has in fact been successful in completing all these events; many which I have not said. One of the ideas was to infect the FBI. I tried to call and meet with local authorities, called the FBI twice, sent an email to a political leader, and sent an email of info to the CIA. The only ones who responded were the local authorities and the FBI. But, it was the same each time. They wanted more evidence than I had. I'm tempted to post the evidence I do have but then I might get in trouble because of it. I'm trapped where I live because I am running out of money. I am somewhat depressed, but sort of coming out of it. In no particular order here is more info I can say without saying names or other identifying information:
The president of the LDS Church was manipulated by this group. He was told to try to get the marriage equality bill passed some time ago. That was MY idea; not his. The church was also told to come up with ways to preen the heard so to speak. This was also my idea. There are more things which I said that I can't recall at this time, but the most important one which the President of the LDS Church needs to know is that I spoke about how lesser authorities will sometimes plot against the upper leaders to kill them and take their spots or to use their connections to manipulate them. I do not know or fully understand this released Bishops next plans, but even though I have left the church now, The president of the Church's life might be in jeopardy and I am sure this previous Bishop will tug any strings he can to use his connections. The church has a mole that neither member nor non-member would approve of.
Christians and Jews are being manipulated. They are being lied to in an effort to control them, using them against each other, and other groups.
This mole group has also been involved in various other destructive tactics such as spreading misinformation and hatred to create various divides between groups such as white vs black, rich vs poor, straight vs LGBT, and so on. They hate the USA. This released Bishop is taking advantage of the church's connections with China as well. The president of the Church needs to find this guy and weed him out.
If I recall correctly, their next plan is to target the LGBT+ community with the goal of their extinction. I would suggest everyone in this group buy weapons and armor of every kind to defend themselves. This makes everything extremely complicated since so many religious people are against the LGBT and have been led to believe so many lies about them. I don't know how to solve any of this.
Worst of all I can't just get up and move. I am trapped where I am because of strange blackmail. I can't ever trust a Mormon again in my life.
Can anyone suggest who to talk to about this? Who can we trust anymore? Who can I give the evidence to so I can live in peace to some degree? The FBI isn't going to help. Why did I have to get caught up in something so beyond my nature? I need advice! I have been ignoring this for far too long because of real fear. I am going to post every day I can and everywhere I can until I see results. I have since left the LDS Church, but I am being harassed by them through other people who are not even Mormon. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm living in fear every day.

Hey guys, so I just bought a sync box HDMI, I installed it just like the app tells you however when I press the sync button lights dimm to zero percent. I already try to reset it from the app but still not working.

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Intro

To preface this review, I just need to say that this is going to be a very, long read. Going through it myself just for the fun of it takes around 30 minutes — it's almost 7k words of text, including lyrical references. So for the best experience, listen to the album beforehand to understand what the hell I was thinking when I wrote this review, play the album while reading, and set a good amount of time aside.
And yes, this is 9 months late 😭 I'm not sorry — when I find an album review online it's always around a paragraph per song or even shorter. It makes sense from a journalistic perspective, but I want to do this album justice, hence taking 7 months to write out all my thoughts.
This shit is comprehensive and definitely overanalyzed, especially in Talk that Talk and Trouble. Each song review will compose of my commentary going over the song, noting the details I noticed through months of listening, then a conclusion. Also, mild swearing warning, I like implementing a touch of "French" when I'm very emotional about something. Anyway, onto the review!
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Between 1&2 💞

Album Review
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TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT
TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED
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Talk that Talk 🎙

Lead producer: collapsedone
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One of the most perfect TWICE songs.
I think this is one of TWICE’s best-sounding title tracks. Warm modulated synths, a thrumming bass line, distant bells, shimmering synths — the purpose of this song is to be fun and my god is it excellent at it, like… Sana and Chaeyoung are saying knock-knock-knock and beep-beep-beep as if they’re some kind of car. So much fun.
Further along in the verse, Dahyun’s voice sounds so full and smooth with that layered harmony. Tzuyu coming with the Yes or Yes, Push & Pull, and 1 to 10 references — these are 5 years of song references. And Jeongyeon closes the pre-chorus accompanied by a rising synth to drop into chorus one. Jeongyeon slays pre-choruses.
The drums accelerate, the synths start blasting, and Jihyo opens to that party of a chorus with her godly vocals,
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Tell me what you want
Tell me what you need
A to Z da malhaebwa
But shijageun ireoke have
Talk that talk ttak han madi
Talk that talk L-O-V-E
deullyeojweo ooh
Now now now now now yeah~

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During Sana's Talk that Talk~ lines there’s this gentle ascending synth bell that rings with the descending melody and it sounds absolutely gorgeous. And the choreography during that part of the chorus is so so so so fun: the talking hands bit, spelling L-O-V-E, concluding with the deullyeojweo ooh! Oh my Jihyo the deullyeojweo ooh…
Have I mentioned this song is fun?
Speeding through verse 2; Chaeyoung’s part with the cat ears popping in the music video is adorable; Momo her stretching her arms out looks so damn cool; and Dahyun with her replay part sounds so lovely — although I think it sonically sounds a touch random, it makes sense thematically.
And now for this pre-chorus. Mina and Jihyo leading into it sound great BUT JEONGYEON… Now, she is my ult bias, and this pre-chorus sounds almost identical to the first one, but the way she holds that final note, enunciating and holding that now~ for one more beat before the chorus drops sounds so perfect — the song teeters on a cliff edge. Jeongyeon slays pre-choruses.
Dropping into the second chorus and man, Jihyo powered through that first chorus, but the way Nayeon delivers it just hits different. She has this indescribable “pop” voice (I promise this wasn't on purpose) that stands out and shouts this is THE chorus. I think this is especially apparent in how both lead their choruses where Jihyo starts at 120% power while Nayeon waits until [Tell me] WHAT YOU WANT to full-send it. She also highlights “malhaebwa” in a similar way later in the chorus.
Another deullyeojweo ooh! Nayeon travels to Narnia, and Mina the engineer strikes again in this heavenly, underwater-esque bridge,
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The simple words “I love you”
That’s all I wanna hear
Without hesitation, I’ll go up to you
I’ll make it simple
And just tell you I love you

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The word “love” is said for the first time in the song. There’s a funky keyboard instrument behind Chaeyoung’s part. Jihyo, Chaeyoung, and Nayeon take the initiative in their lyrics, professing their love before closing the bridge.
And now for the pièce-de-résistance: this final double chorus is exceptional — 40 seconds of crack-laced euphoria; Jihyo switches up the chorus and the choreo, Dahyun chimes in with her fluttery “Talk that Talk”, Momo comes out of nowhere with “oh yeah it sounds so good!” — you’re damn right it does, and this is where the song SOARS.
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han beon deo~ haejweo
geurae banggeum geu mal~

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Nayeon outright shouts “Tell me what you need” and then Jeongyeon sings the above lines in such an ethereal, warm way where the first line ascends while the second line descends, causing a lull in the song before the finale with Nayeon, finishing off the song with the final deullyeojweo ooh! What a party. What a song.
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THE GOOD

• The synths of all time
• The chimes during Talk-that-talk~
• Jeongyeon’s pre-chorus going into Nayeon’s chorus
• The entirety of that magical, final chorus and outro

Needs Work

• The opening hook (Tell me what you want) and accompanying choreography could be “catchier”

Core Memory

• Singing (and dancing) my heart out when this song played at a K-pop club

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Lyrics and theme-wise, if this were to have been TWICE’s last comeback, they’ve once again built upon the theme they've been doing since debut: a Bildungsroman, a coming-of-age story.
This song’s chorus is honest yet simple; it asks the listener, in this case, the other half of the relationship, to be more upfront and open with their love (never be scared of love), that before the relationship can continue and flourish there has to be a foundation and commitment of love between each other.
TWICE debuted with a song about making your crush go ooh ahh. Years later, they started pondering “What is love?” and imagining their crush responding with “yes” when asking them out — and now concluding with the phrase “Talk that talk, [talk that] L-O-V-E”, being upfront with the relationship, wishing their partner to also be happy, to commit to them, to feel the love that they want to impart on them. From gawking like ooh-ahh to talking out your shared love like adults — to having a true relationship between (one and) two.
And can I just say before finishing off Talk that Talk's review that this is such a fun and repeatable song with many little intricacies hidden in the nonet’s vocals and the production. This is the third draft I’m writing about Talk that Talk and its original word count pretty much quadrupled.
Harkening back to TWICE’s roots by combining mature thinking with youthful character, an incredible ending to look forward to, and just simply being a club-banger that’s easy to listen to, TTT is an easy 10/10.
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WATCH ME GO WATCH ME GO
RULE THE WORLD
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Queen of Hearts 👑

Lead producer: LDN Noise of SM
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If there was one B-side to promote in a live clip, this was a solid choice.
Helmed by LDN Noise going headlong into the Western boy-group rock-band aesthetic, Queen of Hearts is a boom-boom-clap song through and through. The drums are very prominent throughout the song, only giving room to riffs of electric guitar in the chorus to drive and continue the momentum of the music.
And speaking of the chorus, vocal line each got a chorus to flex and they did not fuck around,
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You ain’t ready for it
Watch me go~ watch me go~
Rule the world
Know you never doubted baby
I’mma go run the whole universe~

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Cymbals crashing, drums booming, and 3MIX belting all just so sound so good.
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Baby I was born to rule~~
Yeah I’m the queen, I’m the queen
And it’s all because of you~~
That I’m the Queen of Hearts

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These long, held-out notes performed by Jihyo and Nayeon are simply exquisite. Along with the shredding guitar, the drum set coming in full, and the interludes by Dahyun, Momo, and Chaeyoung, this is the part of the song that always, always, gives me goosebumps — it sounds so visceral, so energetic, so fun, so triumphant. Boom-boom-clap songs can be hit or miss with people, but there's no denying the payoff from the first part of the chorus to the second part is worth the wait.
The theme of the song so far has been kind of spread around the song. The chorus alludes to it with the line "And it’s all because of you." But Mina shows more sides of it in the second verse, especially with the phrase,
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And now that I’m surrounded by all my girls
We be shining bright like diamonds and pearls

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It sounds really lovely — in a very cheesy and affectionate kind of way, as it rightfully should — the song is about the girls and their fans. But the bridge is where the song indeed shows its colours
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Screaming out my name
See it in the stage lights
Feel so lucky just to have ya
Cause I know deep down I was meant for something bigger! Greater!
I know you’re seeing what I see
Yeah I’ll be everything you need
I know I’m gonna walk the walk
And talk the talk to be~ [the Queen of Hearts]

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This is a song CONCEIVED TO BE PERFORMED FOR THE FANS. It’s meant to be loud. It’s meant to be unapologetic. It’s meant to be sappy. And it’s all the more wonderful for it.
This is the TWICEiest shit ever.
Like Talk that Talk, Queen of Hearts also has a killer closer. The production already started to grow from the bridge, but now the guitarist finally went Super Saiyan and instead of supporting the drums, they both take the centrepiece in tandem.
Then finally, the closing moments of the song even manage to squeeze in some more sappiness.
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So thank you for the memories
You’re all the ones who made me~
So thank you for the memories
That I’m the Queen of Hearts

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I still can’t believe that this banger is a FAN SONG out of all things. Truly, the TWICEiest shit ever.
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THE GOOD

• Adorable fucking lyrics
• Unrelenting, roaring chorus
• English and vocal flex
• Addicting guitar riffs

Needs Work

• Chaeyoung rapping in English in their Korean songs somehow slaps harder than her English rapping in their English songs, nonetheless, in QoH, it fits with the sound of the song

Life Highlight

• Walking home from a K-pop festival with this song playing, felt like a Queen of Hearts

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I love these types of rock songs with how grunge and head-bang-able they are, there is just a certain nostalgic and cheesy quality to them that feels so cozy. I don’t love putting them on repeat, because in this case, I do believe there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. Perhaps more shredding, maybe a guitar solo to rock out to, or an accompaniment(!) of ad-libs from 3MIX to support Jihyo’s final chorus? A ONCE can dream of a truly bombastic rock song from TWICE. But then again that distracts from the core of what this song is: a fan song disguised as a rock song.
Queen of Hearts has so much sweetness in its lyrics and message that it's overflowing. The drums, guitar, and vocals can be as loud and intricate as they can, but the theme of this song is what makes it special from TWICE’s other rock songs — it’s a 9/10 for me.
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I WANNA WANNA WANNA
TAKE YOU TO THE BASICS
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Basics 🌈

Sole lyricist credit: Chaeyoung
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Quite possibly the jammiest (pun intended) song of the album.
A song written by the Strawberry Princess herself — an event similar in frequency to other artists' releases with her last song being 2020’s silky Handle It — Basics first starts with an understated and dreamy delivery. After the first stanza, however, a bouncy Miami bass line emerges, revealing the true nature of the song: this is a classic summer bop! Especially in the first rap,
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dareun aedeulgwaneun dalla
Ain’t beggin’ for love
nappeun geon anijana ige naraseo
eodiro twilji molla
Like rainbow bubble gum
geureoni nal kkwak butjabadweo

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Syllables are pronounced in a relaxed nature, bars often starting with an "ah" sound, flirty lines in English — this rap features a production full of pop with R&B flourishes and, in my opinion, this is Chaeyoung’s bag. Also, the line "rainbow bubblegum" is so adorable and so Chaeyoung.
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I wanna wanna wanna take it to the basics
da weonhae weonhae weonhae? seodureuji ma Baby
ppeonhae ppeonhae malhae mweohae da al tende
Ah yeah ah yeah ah yeah ah yeah

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That chorus is pure pop with a Miami bass backing; you better be bopping your head to the melody, if not booty poppin' to the bassline. Chaeyoung loves rhyming in the first half of the chorus to enhance its catchiness and it's damn incredible: the “wanna”, “weonhae”, and “ppeonhae” all create these imperfect rhymes that continue momentum without feeling repetitive.
After the very Boy With Luv-sounding “ah yeah ah yeah, ah yeah ah yeah” comes an 8-bar split half and half between Chaeyoung and Momo. Coming from the chorus, the production completely cuts out for the first 2 bars. This adds tension; the song yearns to have that bass beat thumping again and all we have in the audio space in those 2 bars is Chaeyoung spittin' and she delivered.
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taneun deut tteugeoun samak wie
yeppeuge pieonan jangmi gata
joshimseure naege dagaol ttae
nado moreuge jjilleobeoril tende

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Translating to:
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Above the hot, burning desert
It’s like a rose that bloomed beautifully
When you come to me slowly
I will prick you unconsciously

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The rap feels slick, effortless, and confident. Her diction remains sharp when enunciating each syllable but she doesn’t let the flow of her rap waver or build as her 4 bars go by, it’s just smooth consistency throughout. Even the lyrics possess an aura of laid-back collectedness that is just so her. The things Chaeyoung can do when given her pen.
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THE GOOD

• That sweet summer vibe of a chorus
• The “spaceship” post-chorus is killer
• Chaeyoung devoured this song
• Sure-footed, confident lyrics

Needs Work

• Perhaps an alteration of that ah yeah ah yeah line
• The way Jihyo did her pre-chorus line is good, but Mina’s is great

Core Memory

• After donating my hair, walking down the rainbow-coloured areas of downtown Toronto with this song playing was very… fitting

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This song is summer bliss distilled into 2:56. It’s dreamy, the raps are satisfying, and the ending is charming. I will say that although the second half of the song adds the stunning “spaceship” post-choruses and a floaty bridge with an incredible drumbeat drop into the final chorus, the raps of the song make it feel a bit front-loaded. And in an album stacked with awesome finishers, it feels more apparent.
With that said, it’s an 8/10 bop for me. This song is so easy to put on and it feels exactly what Chaeyoung would make if given the reins to produce a pop song all on her own. The lyrics are nonchalant but full of conviction, the wordplay is intricate, and the production playful but not too bombastic — it's just a nice vibe. Songs like Basics are the standard for good, simple, repeatable pop music and I’m happy that Chaeyoung got to test her pen in this genre.
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BABY WE’RE IN
TROUBLE TROUBLE
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Trouble 💃

Sole lyricist credit: Jihyo
Background vocals: Jihyo
Lead composer credit: Jihyo
Vocal director credit: Jihyo (an assumption given her contributions in First Time)
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One of the most enjoyable songs I’ve heard in a while.
There is an underlying tension within the first 4 bars of the song, Jihyo and Nayeon confidently open it to a nondescript array of synths and then the stanza ends, Momo announces “Let’s go”, the beat drops and it hits you: this is a club song.
Dahyun's relaxed delivery contrasted with Jeongyeon's staccato flow, the wobbly synth beat with sprinkle of house piano, Sana dramatically slowing down the song only for Tzuyu to build it back up until the chorus drops,
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• Nayeon opens it using a breathy tone, with vocal chops serving as harmonies
• The blooming of the house piano takes centre stage and the song ascends into euphoria
• A random drum roll capped off by a cymbal crash
• Jeongyeon’s pronunciation of the word “trouble” almost being a growl
• Chaeyoung slyly admitting “I like this trouble”
• The entirety of Tzuyu’s tro~oh~oh~ouble yeah~
• Sana using her deep voice for the na~na~na~na
• Jihyo leading the vocals during the synchronized T W I C E chant

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This chorus is perfect. Toronto’s residential market needs this song injected into its veins because god damn this song has SO much house in it. And then, ANOTHER KILLING PART: this rap fucking slaps.
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gamchweo bwatja geugeon Fake
ppajin hamjeongeun Sweet cake

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During the first 2 bars, Chaeyoung is keeping it calm because that trip of a chorus just ended and the song needs a breather, but I don't think anyone expected her to SNAP this hard afterwards:
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You cannot resist this
Cannot miss this, such a bliss
Ima put it down down
Oh yeah, better kiss kiss

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Below is the structure of her this portion of the rap, I’m not that well versed in this technical aspect of music theory but I digress, this is all in the span of around 5 seconds where it’s:
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Triplet-triplet
Quadruplet-triplet
Quadruplet-doublet
Doublet-quadruplet

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Now, 25/5 = 5 syllables per second isn’t groundbreaking, but goddamn it these 2 bars sound so nice — if there is one part in this album that I always repeat, it’s this. The addition of that first quadruplet for “cannot miss this” in the midst of the triplets sticks out and accelerates the flow of the rap while the following doublets and quadruplets destabilize and slow the rap down as the verse closes. And can I just point out:
THE MAIN VOCALIST WROTE, DIRECTED, AND COMPOSED THIS SONG ‼
Chaeyoung of course delivered the fuck out of her verse but THIS is what you get when you have a member not only write the words they’re saying but also the melody and flow with which they sing it, when that member knows the others so well that when they write a song they know how to make the group exceed. This is what you get when the artists you stan love doing artist shit.
And. AND. That's not all — with how much I mentioned I love a good outro to close a song, this outro slaps as well:
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Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trouble be-be
Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trouble bay-be
Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trouble bay-beh
Woo wee woo wee woo
I like this trou-ble

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Like, come on, Nayeon’s imitating a police siren for crying out loud. And this is all after her ad-libs in the final post-chorus; after the pianist going full tilt and playing that piano as if it was their last chance to ever play; after that final T W I C E chant by all the members come these blissful 20 seconds at the very end. What a song.
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THE GOOD

• The theme of relishing in an uncontrolled love
• Sana and Mina’s melody in the pre-chorus
• Chorus
• Rap
• Outro
• Wees and woos

Needs Work

• Mina’s line of “falling down, falling down, falling down low” in verse 2 feels a bit too abrupt of a change

Core Memory

• While writing Trouble's review I had this song on repeat for my whole subway commute and I must've been so distracting, just head-bopping and being so invested in enjoying a song

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Need I say more, easy 9/10. The only reason I place Talk that Talk above Trouble is because of what that song represents but besides that, this is one of the best “international” sounds they’ve put out. Actually, I haven’t listened to Eyes wide open in a while but this song is up there with one of the most sonically pleasing pieces of work they’ve done.
Clubbing TWICE has always been a thing since TT was birthed in 2016, and has been a staple of their discography since 2019’s Fancy You and Feel Special mini albums, but Trouble unapologetically dives into and fits the house genre so well you’d think that this is TWICE’s bread and butter sound.
Trouble is Jihyo’s magnum opus. What a song.
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BRAVE BRAVE BRAVE
FOR YOU
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Brave 💖

Main producer: Slow Rabbit of HYBE
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I first thought this was just a good song, then I read the lyrics.
Gentle guitar plucks, shimmering synths, a distant keyboard in the right ear, in the left a glockenspiel, the melodic oohs from the members — this song is PRETTY.
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The night that was unusually dark
Above this terrifying world, felt so lonely
The world has grown in the time of wandering
So hard to breathe

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Mina and Chaeyoung open the song with how they feel lonely and that it's hard to breathe and now suddenly the song feels bittersweet — I was not expecting the song to be this emotional. Brave describes a situation where the singer is in a darker place in life and it isn't until another person gives them hope by calling them 'brave' that they find the drive to keep going.
Once the chorus hits, the melodies pick up, more guitars get added — there’s even an electric guitar hidden in the mix somewhere, and the song drops the emotional front to reveal a mid-tempo pop song to dance to while crying in the club. The song as a whole still carries this melancholy feeling, but now with the added support of this chorus acting as a light amongst the gloom.
Continuing on in the second verse there's this gorgeous, well-placed break in the song that just lets it settle after that chorus. Only a seasoned producer would risk this much empty space in a song and Slow Rabbit went to fill those shoes.
Back to the chorus, I'll take this moment to once again commend Slow Rabbit with the mixing of the song, because 4MIX undoubtedly sounds good in the chorus, and the interludes from Dahyun, Chaeyoung, and Mina also sound really good, but the clear highlight of the choruses are these lines:
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Oh na na na neon nal naige hae [Momo, then Tzuyu, then Momo]
On and on and on
Brave brave brave for ya [Dahyun, then Chaeyoung, then Mina]
Oh na na na neon nal sum shwige hae [Sana, then Momo, then Sana]
On and on and on oh trust me babe

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Momo, Sana, and Tzuyu form this beautiful, surprisingly catchy, second half of the chorus accompanied by a guitar drop. It should not turn out this well with how conflicting the "na"s are with the guitar melody but it creates this gentle bopping ebb and flow that feels so lush and mellow.
Diving into the bridge reveals that the listener of the song is revealed not only capable of supporting the singer through direct words but also through their thoughts and dreams. As can be discerned, this can be a song interpreted to be about ONCEs, about how they push TWICE to be their best selves despite the breathless hardships they face. It's a very sweet and touching song.
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THE GOOD

• Special lyrics
• Pleasant sound to vibe out to
• That gentle break after the first chorus
• Jihyo’s high note at the end
• A Nayeon Jeongyeon joint high note ⁉️
• Just pretty vocals throughout

Needs Work

• Potentially hard to comprehend without translating the Korean lyrics

Core Memory

• Form of Therapy’s life motto revolves around the word “brave”. I don’t know where I got that from, but I remembered it right before watching his album reaction

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I’m actually spoiled with the TWICE members’ easy-to-understand songwriting that when a song like this pops up where it's not written by a member and the thematic bits are mostly in Korean, I tend to put it aside in favour of the other songs on the album. And, especially for a song focusing on a theme like this where the English phrases don’t do the Korean lyrics enough justice, it does place a bit of a barrier on the listening experience, dropping it down to a 7/10 from an 8/10.
With that anecdote out of the way, this song is just such a vibe, man. I know that sounds super hippy to say but Brave is so mellow and smooth that I can’t help but sway a little when that chorus hits. And then I remember what the lyrics say and I tear up a bit on the inside. This song is so pure, raw, and full of heart — we need more songs like these where they just reminisce about life while putting up an upbeat front. Don't mind me just crying while dancing the night away.
With that said, this isn't the first time this theme has been sung by TWICE either, they've long trodden this path of supportive, confiding, up-lifting songs with Young & Wild, Rainbow, Queen, Go Hard, Depend on You, even this album's Queen of Hearts, and, of course, Feel Special. Brave just adds another on top of an already stacked lineup, unique with its mellow somberness.
Also now feels like a good time to get into my rating system:

• 7/10s are songs are ones that are simply good throughout or great songs with apparent flaws
• 8/10s are great songs with standout characteristics
• 9/10s are borderline perfect songs where I sometimes can't comprehend how great they are
• And 10/10s are the best of an artist's discography, songs that encapsulate their ethos perfectly or expand upon them in a meaningful way

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I SEE THE LIES
ON THE TIP OF YOUR TONGUE
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Gone 💨

Sole lyricist credit: Dahyun
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Who the fuck pissed off Dubu this time??
It’s getting quite rare to see TWICE pull off brand new sounds because, with now 190 original songs under their belt, they’ve done so many genres and sub-genres varying from hyper pop, to bossa nova, to whatever 2020’s Go Hard is. So it’s surprising to see they’ve still got tricks up their sleeves and Gone is one of them.
The song starts with strings swinging back and forth and vocal chops dancing from ear to ear, teasing what’s yet to come. Jihyo enters the song with a whisper and the song sets its pace. A stagnant drum pad moves the song along and typical song progression would have Mina continue the build but — it doesn’t. The song simmers, adding a hint of high hat to the pot. And then, Sana and Tzuyu come on and surely the buildup must boil over right?
Silence, until…
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I see the LIES on the top of your tongue

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The strings emerge again on full blast, the simmer rolls to a boil, and the anger of the song is revealed,
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All the fate I had towards you
Fades like a fog, gone, gone
Your flipping mind of doing this and that
I’m tired of it, it’s meaningless
In the beginning, it was hard to believe
With that, hatred increases

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The singer is so scorned and burned from this relationship that they reminisce about all the effort they’ve put in since the beginning, but their “partner” is so unconcerned that they’ve just about had enough of the relationship altogether.
This has been Dahyun’s thing since 2020’s Bring It Back, 2021’s Cruel, 2022’s That’s all I’m saying, and even 2023's Don't Blame It On Me — emotionally charged breakup songs that make you feel as if she’s gone through a dozen bad relationships. Dispatch, do your job better, or don't.
Another highlight of the song is the post-chorus going into the bridge. This segment reiterates the structure from the first post-chorus — a barrage of drums supported by the rhythmic strumming of a bass guitar along with a consistent synth filling out the soundscape. But this time, it’s Dahyun and Chaeyoung on the rap:
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I can’t stand it anymore [Dahyun]
My patience, invisible
I can’t find it, it’s all gone
Even if I try to turn back, it’s too late [Chaeyoung]
There’s no use anymore
It has left, it’s long gone
You, with flipping mind, you are out [Momo]
I know that you know what I’m talking about [Dahyun]
Nothing you could say that could turn this around
I’m gone

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Continuing the disrespected theme of the song, Dahyun notes that she’s finally had enough with Chaeyoung adding that there’s no point salvaging what was once there for all of it is long gone. Momo and Dahyun round it off by telling the listener that there’s no point trying to reason with them or playing naive, they fucked up and there’s no coming back.
Can I just say, it's a bit of a shame that Chaeyoung’s rapping popped off in this album while Dahyun only has this one verse that she shares with Chaeyoung, but it just sounds so good how Dahyun eases in after the chorus with her light rapping tone transitioning into her singing. She even holds the “gone” in a little crescendo for some added pizzazz.
And, there’s no way I’m not going to talk about Momo’s vocals in this bridge. Damned if she only got 1 line to use it in, her lower register is incredible. She sounds so smooth singing in this tone. All of TWICE do in particular and there is nary a weak vocal performance in this album.
To close the song off, a wash of synths gets to have their shine in the spotlight, showered with Nayeon’s belting, signifying the dramatic and drawn-out conclusion of this partnership.
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THE GOOD

• They’ve still got their surprises
• Thundering chorus
• 2nd rap and bridge combo
• A bitter, crumbling relationship theme

Needs Work

• I’m not a huge fan of the mixing during the first post-chorus, where Momo's vocals were fighting with the production, which is disappointing because Momo is capable of an insane flow
• The post-chorus in general, specifically the first one, can be a bit tiring on repeat listens

Core Memory

• Actually, I think this song sounds like a mix between GOT7's Not By The Moon, BLACKPINK’s Love To Hate Me, and Dahyun’s Bring It Back. I don’t know where I got this thought came from, but it stuck

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Going back to that point about the first post-chorus as a whole; songs that have the production continue unchanged into the post-chorus/2nd verse are very hit or miss for me — see TWICE's Don't Call Me Again for an overbearing example. The post-chorus going into the bridge contrasts Dahyun’s light tone nicely with the hard-hitting production, continuing the energy until it slowly fades into silence at the end of the bridge.
Back to the song as a whole, as much as TWICE has been experimenting with their sound for the past 4 years now, I’m happy they’re still finding new ways to explore what they’re capable of. And for that alone, even though I’m not a big fan of songs like these where they rely on sounding “big”, Dahyun’s lyricism and the thrill I receive every time I indulge myself in this song when I listen to it for the first time in a while elevates it to an 8/10. Keep on breaking hearts, Dubu.
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INVINCIBLE
SUPERHEROES
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When We Were Kids 🧸

Sole lyricist credit: Dahyun
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Press play to reminisce, pull up lyrics to cry.
This song is so beautiful. I’m totally not writing this song review, crying on the bus reminiscing about my childhood, while just having turned 21. I don’t know if these are happy or sad tears but this song is so beautiful either way.
Warm synths, muted piano, a gentle high hat, the younger members starting off the song — this has to be up there for one of the softest TWICE songs ever. And as it should, it’s one of the TWICEiest songs ever. And then Nayeon comes in,
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Invincible superheroes, we wanted to be adults
To the higher, clearer world

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The chords start swelling, the high hat keeps pace, and the harmonies come in,
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Remember when we were kids
When we were kids, we didn’t know
If we could go back
I will love it even more
Remember when we were kids

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Jihyo takes up the second half of the chorus as it drops, trading the strings for an almost R&B synth production — if choir R&B takes off, this song started it. The song relishes in this cacophony of warm sounds until returning to its sparse and peaceful verses.
This time, the hints of piano are louder, little twinkling synths begin to shimmer, the drum buildup comes and Jeongyeon drives the song straight into the chorus. No time for the strings to build like in Nayeon’s — this song loves its chorus so much.
And I'll just take this time to appreciate the amount of Jeongyeon vocals in this album. Her voice is so clean, stable, and projected — but also more tender and soft compared to the more pronounced tones of Nayeon and Jihyo.
The bridge comes in, repeating the phrase:
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I wish that I could meet
Could meet the younger me

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Giving the song time to rest, before building back up to the last chorus — this time led by Jihyo, completing the 3MIX trifecta. And interestingly enough, Chaeyoung follows up in the second half of the chorus, rather than another member of the vocal line. She really did pop off in this album.
As the last chorus begins to close, the percussion at its strongest, the harmonies on blast, the background vocals cranked up to their Sunday best, is the song going to end? Of course not! This is an album full of banger endings as if the songs don’t want to end, and When We Were Kids being the album closer very much indulges in that feeling.
After a brief refrain, accented by Nayeon’s high note with a touch of vibrato, the song almost dives back into a fourth chorus. Nayeon and Jeongyeon harmonize — a rare and heavenly moment. And the song repeats the bridge, reiterating that they want to meet their younger selves, this time with the lush chorus production before closing with silence, a few piano notes, and Tzuyu singing the last line of the song:
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Oh, we were kids

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Reflection, acceptance, hope. What a song.
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THE GOOD

• Heavenly vocals throughout
• Relatable, heartfelt lyrics
• Euphoric chorus
• Great closer to the album

Needs Work

• Refrain after the last chorus, "Back when we were kids," could’ve been executed better

Core Memory

• For an album titled Between 1&2, I don’t think anything hits harder than finishing the song reviews, with this song in particular, during your 21st birthday

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I wrote the first part of this review in November 2022. Then university, life, and other things got in the way of my headspace for me to feel confident about wrapping all of this up. In a way, I felt like I just didn’t want this review to end because of the joy that writing gives me — I didn’t want the happiness to end. And then it hit me, after watching a YouTuber rank animated movies and them placing Spirited Away at the top and explaining 'why' reminded me of just how important growing up is, and by extension this song.
This theme is important for both the rookie TWICE members in 2015 and the teenagers who would follow their journey and grow up with them, facing life’s obstacles along the way. Hardships that used to only involve family, crushes, and social media, evolve into work, commitments and all the struggles that adult life brings. Being a kid and enjoying the simple things in life is one of the most sought-after moments we want to relive because we took growing up for granted. The only thing we can do now is look back on ourselves with fondness and rose-tinted lenses.
TWICE’s original marketing was to resonate with people through their senses and their hearts. That was during their debut, and I think it still holds up today. In my opinion, touching people through their emotions is what TWICE does best and makes them one of K-pop’s all-time greats. It was never about having the best numbers — it was always about being the best idols. And to think that this journey of maturation and growth would occur from 2015 all the way to this song, being a fitting nod to TWICE’s 7th anniversary, I don’t think anyone at the company nor the group would ever imagine that they would get this far. It’s these nine women or none — 9/10.
This song honestly deserves a 10/10 with how much I noticed other people reminiscing their childhoods after I heard this song, it is such a widely-relatable message, but I am determined to limit myself to one 10/10 song per album and if I were to pick between TTT and WWWK, I'd give it to the one's that's more repeatable — Talk that Talk just has this electric energy about it.
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Epilogue

And finally here is the end. If you made it in one sitting then I commend you, because I could not write this mess in one sitting. As alluded to, I started writing this album review sometime in October, after a series of edits the first draft was finished in March, and now here's the final draft in June.
I love this album. It got me through some important parts of my life, both good and bad, and it's just a wonderful listen throughout. Reliving this album again before finally completing the review has been an exciting journey. Brave hit me harder this time, after being overshadowed by the other gems of this album, and WWWK finally got me to tear up and not just be emotionally satisfied.
I feel like there's something for everyone on this album. From the exhilarating thrills of TTT to the anthemic euphoria of QoH, the clubbing dichotomy of Trouble and Brave to the blissful glee of Basics, and the sweet reminiscence of WWWK to the thundering anger that is Gone. Like Eyes wide open, I liken Between 1&2 to a pop music taste platter — there's such an eclectic mix of pop, music in this album that there's bound to be a song that someone will love, like, and dislike.
Is this album perfect? I don't think so, but it's close — it was certainly my 2022 AOTY. Was this review biased? Absolutely. I've been a fan since 2019 and with the themes in this album, I also feel like it was biased towards me as a ONCE. And how would I rank the album in TWICE's catalogue? It's honestly at the top, at least with EPs — I also felt that way towards Feel Special but then this album was birthed so I'm excited for TWICE's future.
Ready To Be was also a stunning album and Eyes wide open frankly also deserved the spotlight that Formula of Love received so I might hit those next but no promises; this album took long enough to bake.
As for the performances, I've only seen Twitter clips (no fancams to not spoil myself) and I am SO EXCITED to finally see them in July. QoH was as glorious as expected, Brave was a delightful surprise, and WWWK, while not being the concert closer everyone expected it to be, paired up nicely with Crazy Stupid Love. And of course the bombastic addition of the dance break to TTT. But, this is not a concert review, and this is where this album review ends.
Feel free to comment with any thoughts regarding the album, other TWICE albums, and any suggestions for my writing in general. Congrats again on making it this far!
God, I love this album.

Whats up guys, hope everyone's having a nice day! 22 Year old male here, I've been retaining for 82 days now and feel better than I've ever felt. However, I'm still dealing with a few health issues and I'm hoping that someone can shed some light on them.
First of all, I've been working on getting into remission from Hashimoto's thyroiditis for a few years now. (Under-active thyroid) I noticed that my injuries (neck clicking, concussions and general bone alignment problems) have been healing incredibly well since I started SR. I'd like to think that the same thing will happen with my thyroid, but the doc said that might be tough since a lot of damage has been done to it. Another thing I will mention is that I have a deviated septum. Aside from that I've also been working on overcoming low self-esteem/ confidence issues since I just got off xanax and alcohol 6 months ago- which I was abusing for a few years. I feel great throughout the day and don't experience any of the negative symptoms I used to have. However, I had a blood test done a couple weeks ago and my thyroid levels were incredibly high (not a good thing) and my testosterone levels came out incredibly low.
TSH= 75 (normal range is 0.450-4.500) (Thyroid stimulating hormone)
Testosterone= 249
The naturopath I've been seeing doesn't know what is causing the problem: the low testosterone, or the high thyroid- but he believes there is a link between the two. Potentially an issue caused by the pituitary gland...
He advised me to get back to taking a natural, desiccated thyroid supplement on a daily basis then re-test the numbers in a few months. I'm hesitating because I want my body to heal naturally and don't want to be dependent on pills for my whole life. I also don't want them to interfere with the natural healing process that my body is undergoing. I mentioned SR to the doc and he didn't know anything about it, said to keep doing it if I think it's helping. (It's a way of life for me now so I'm not gonna stop lol)
I've also been considering taking Gaia meds Libido pills which are supposed to help with low T and I've also thought about taking sea-moss capsules. My diet mainly consists of meat, eggs and fresh fruit. I just started getting back into working out after recovering from injuries for a few months. I also fast once a week to cleanse my system which seems to be working really well. I meditate everyday, but I have trouble with deep breathing because of my deviated septum- I do believe there could be a relationship between that and my thyroid/ Test levels- the doc said it's possible as well. I've been thinking that if my testosterone levels don't improve in a few months, that I should get on TRT- but I really do see that as a last resort.
My goal is to make a perfect recovery and never have to take medication again. I have faith in myself and God and know that I will heal in time- just looking for more opinions on the matter. Any advice is much appreciated! Thanks for taking the time to read this. Much love,
Ox