Father's day golf sayings
I'm worthless at work
2023.06.08 01:08 noideajustnoidea I'm worthless at work
To begin with, yes, I do have super low self-esteem. Generally, it's hard for me to learn. Following an online course is nearly impossible because I lose focus after appx. 5min and I don't have the self-discipline to continue. I''m stuck most of the time at work, but still afraid of asking questions... I get a bug to solve and I'm paralyzed to start. I feel stupid & anxious when I work with people (my colleagues have their shit together, they work fast, are responsive, and don't avoid messages like me). I try to escape the office and get home just to ask my bf to help me solve problems so that I can lie to myself and my colleagues that 'I achieved' something. Most of the day I don't know how, but I don't do anything at work, and then the sprint is poof magically gone and I haven't delivered anything. I'm a junior, got the job since I'm a woman with immigrant background and I work in a well known tech company. I feel like I occupy the spot that a skilled young person deserves and not a lazy person who can't achieve anything. When summer interns come to work, believe me, they know so much more than me. I really do not know how and why I got the job. I came straight from the university and they never checked my technical skills. In the meetings I can't process what people talk about, so I just nod but at the same time I'm anxious that I don't understand what they say. Then I get questions from other teammates about updates from the meeting and I black out. Morning meetings are a struggle as well, it's when we're supposed give an update about our current tasks and I never know what to say (or forget what I'm supposed to say even if I have some notes written down). I feel like a failure and it's nice that I can share it at least here.
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2023.06.08 01:07 SeaworthinessIcy4767 Ashlyn soon lol
2023.06.08 01:07 Colonelkok NDA enforceable?
I signed an NDA for a job. The NDA has 0 identifying information in the contract. Just says “company” and “employee”… literally the company name is NOWHERE on it. As well as the only signature being mine. I do not have a copy signed by the other party and it does not say the company name or anyone affiliated with them.
The first line is “this employment agreement (hereinafter the “agreement”) is made and entered into this day, x/x/2023, between blank, located at __blank___(hereinafter “COMPANY”), and _my name__ (hereinafter “EMPLOYEE”)(collectively the “parties”) with reference to the following facts.
So without actually identifying the name and location of the establishment in the contract, is it valid?
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2023.06.08 01:07 BigCardiologist2205 I am ready for the downvotes. Especially after a comment I made last week on someone’s post. I’ve always hated the term “daddy issues “ like it’s our fault. It’s time we stop using this and direct the hatred towards the horrible fathers.
2023.06.08 01:07 anonymous27690 I need advice on what to say to my father
For context I live on a decently large property and normally during the summers I do chores around it. I’m trying to get a job tho and my dad keeps saying a job is a privilege that I haven’t earned and he needs my help to maintain the property. I realize he’s full of shit and just want to keep control of me by stunting my finances but what do I even say to this. I need money to move out and I just finished my sophomore year i can’t wait much longer. My parents also keep trying to coax me into working for other JWs most likely because they don’t like the idea of me working for someone who won’t keep an eye on me to make sure I’m not doing anything “wrong”.
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2023.06.08 01:07 ApolloBollo Is My 3 Year Old “Normal”?
I’m not even sure where to start - but here goes :
2015 - husband and I start trying to get pregnant 2016 - first miscarriage at 11 weeks 2017 - Clomid 2018 - RE and egg retrieval 2018 - 2x miscarriage
2019 - Jan. Miscarriage
2019 - May 2x embryo transfer
May 2019 - PREGNANT! Jan 2020 - Ari is born!!
From day one, Ari has been a challenge. He is obscenely smart and very stubborn. He rarely does things without knowing why he is doing them. This also means if you don’t do what he wants, watch out. Dude will flip his absolute shit. He has started trying to spit at people when he is really fired up - everyone says to ignore him. Well, I’ve been doing that for over two months now with no change.
He has started preschool and goes M and F. We had our first parent-teacher meeting two days ago and it was amazing. The child he is in preschool is 180° from the boy he is at home. She said how unique and intelligent he was. How kind and polite and generous. He’s funny and engaged. And he can be all of those things at home, too, but they don’t see angry Ari the way we do. When he is home he gets so angry when he doesn’t get what he wants. He seems to hardly listen to any direction we give him and is fast to get upset.
My husband and I have very different ways we handle this. When Ari is feeling the feelings (which means he listens even less than usual), my husband can handle it for maybe 10 minutes. He will either say “I’m done. I can’t handle this” and leave, or he will yell loudly enough to scare the pants off Ari (which leads to him crying more). My way to “handle” it is I try not to ditch him when he is really stressed out. Tonight I sat in his room with him and taught him he can scream into a pillow, which he thought was amazing comedy. After about twenty minutes I got into his bed and he climbed in.
Honestly, I don’t think my husband or myself have this figured out. He is such a high energy kid and very challenging, but boy is he a lover. And so so kind and funny. His manners are amazing. I’m just so tired of feeling like a bad mom when he acts out around other people. Like, this is our everyday. He isn’t just having an off day. Couple this with IVF guilt (I can’t complain because I’m lucky enough to even have a child) and I’m a right mess.
Is this normal? Is it normal to fight over every single thing? Will he get better? Or does this just keep getting harder and harder? I thought two sucked but three is where it’s at. I need some help, y’all - playing in traffic isn’t a long term solution for me (it’s a joke. I would never hurt myself).
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2023.06.08 01:07 Useful-Elk9648 Lore?
Henry Emily in the character encyclopaedia has a picture of his family with two children, a boy and a girl… Gregory and Charlie!! Henry Emily could be the father of David and Charlie. If the mimic1 programme recognised the coding from the puppet, which is in the blob with its eyes unlit because the spirit isn’t actually present in the blob, (when the engineers were scanning in circuit boards from old animatronics) as his sister it could have internalised that coding and made Charlie part of the mimic1 programme putting her in charge of the megaplex and from there it could be possible she built the Gregory bot as a stand in for her brother that died to mimic1 maybe using the staff bots or animatronics and taught him how to code through the post it note room in order to carry out Henry’s instructions in the FNAF 4 secret room. If Henry Emily (Edwin) was on the board of directors as part of the creative department when the pizzaplex is being built under Mr. Burrows he could have easily snuck in the FNAF 4 secret room before being laid off. Also Henry Emily in the character encyclopaedia has two drastically different appearances in the family photo and the photos of him by himself which would go with the whole 40 years later thing. The only problem is that he was meant to die in FNAF 6??? He says he intended to stay behind and burn too, that he was nearby but we never saw that so he could have been lying? Or he could have put plans in motion to have the megaplex built over the FNAF 6 pizza place and mimic1 installed whilst on the board of directors and then been part of the FNAF 6 fire ending? Or Scott could have just retconned it?
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2023.06.08 01:07 myparentsareinsanee TIFU By Getting Drunk/Contact High and Confessing to the Guy I’m Hooking Up With
I, 16F, am on a bit of a rebellious streak. Last night I snuck out and went out with some friends to a party/sesh. There was about 15 of us at one point, most of whom I knew to varying degrees.
Most of the night itself was actually a lot of fun. Its towards the end of the night when things got messy.
I didn’t do any drugs, but I was definitely contact high, and I didn’t shy away from taking shots. I eventually got quite drunk, and this was my first time ever drinking, let alone being drunk.
Well, me and this guy (also 16) who I will call Harry have been hooking up for about 3 weeks. I met him through my best friend (which is a whole other story) and within a day he asked me if I would be down to hook up.
Outside of this, we just became very good friends. Harry is a genuinely good, sweet guy. He’s always checking in and has a clear interest in my day. It has made me feel pretty great, and I quickly fell head over heels.
However, I’m moving away in a few weeks. He has said a few times not to get too attached or fall for him due to me moving and him not wanting me to be sad. I said that there were no worries there because there was no way, and I wasn’t like that (and normally I’m not). Of course, by then it was too late, and I was very much into him.
He also wants to keep the whole thing a secret, and we actually didn’t talk to each other for the first hour or so, until the alcohol kicked in and I had the balls to actually talk to him. It was going ok until it wasn’t.
I can’t remember all of what I’d said, but I do remember bits and pieces: “Did you know, you’re like super fucking hot.” Which then led into, “I have the biggest crush on you, and it sucks because nothing can come of it.” Some blah blah blah. “Why don’t you like me?” He then said that we just didn’t have the time. I started rambling, but basically boiled down to, “It really sucks, but I’m ok just having sex with you.” I didn’t quite catch what he said, but he didn’t sound happy, and I think it was something like ‘you really shouldn’t be saying that.’
Mind you, we were the only ones in the house because everyone else was outside, so no one else heard it.
I got ‘upset’ and when my friend Gabrielle came inside to grab something, I hugged her and was very sadly saying, “I fucked it all up man. I just fucked it all up,” while Harry was practically right next to me.
When we were waiting for an uber, I sadly asked if he hated me. He said No, of course not. I said, “I really don’t want you to hate me…I’m sorry…I understand if you want to end things now.” He didn’t give much of a response.
Which then brings us to now. I messaged him this morning to again apologise, saying that I was sorry for saying the things I did and that it was wrong of me. I reiterated that I understood if he wanted to end things, and that I was again very sorry for fucking it up.
He’s seen it, but hasn’t responded, which I think is answer enough.
I’m quite upset over what happened and I’m kicking myself for fucking up something I enjoyed so much, and I’m scared to lose this friend, because he’s been so good for me up til this point, and I genuinely couldn’t imagine not talking to him every day.
I’m lost and confused and don’t want to lose him but I don’t know what to do. I’m going to give him space though, and let him decide where we go from here.
TLDR; I got way too drunk and confessed my feelings to the guy I've been hooking up with, and have probably ruined our friendship
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2023.06.08 01:06 plantasiaa I (32F) Broke Up With BF (34M) of 2 Years Over Anger Issues-Anyone else experience this?
Has anyone ever dated someone that seemed like a different person when they were angry?
I just broke up with my Bf of 2 years because his anger issues have made me uncertain about a future with him. We almost broke up once before over it. Ironically I told him I needed to talk to him about something but that I wanted to talk later (was at work) and then that afternoon he shouted and swore on the phone that I had ‘ruined his day’ out of worry and how inconsiderate that was. The irony was that I wanted to talk to him about his short temper, and how it was affecting me.
We had a long talk at that time and decided to move forward, him eventually (after days of rude and manipulative texting) fully admitting to having some issues and hearing me out about how it made me feel, promising to do better, etc.
He always seemed to be like a totally different person when mad, either at me or the world around us. His tone was just incredibly hurtful and nasty, and often he took digs at me and was spiteful and rude during ‘discussions’, no matter how gently and diplomatically I tried to approach things.
I began to ‘shut down’ when he got mad, simply because I was so stressed and didn’t want to make things worse-but also because it freaked me out and made me so stressed for our future. My therapist told me this was more of a ‘trauma response’ or ‘fawning’ than the silent treatment, because I just always felt like I was walking on eggshells.
He could be such a lovely and loving person when he was in a good mood, and a lot of the time he was, but when he was irritated he had sort of a cloud over him and made me feel so small and crappy, to be honest.
He would say things to me like it’s not a good time’ to talk or that I had ‘ruined the day’ by wanting to discuss something, so I felt like he just wanted me to forget his temper and impatience and always just move on, not make a ‘big deal’ and ‘talk about everything’.
One time this year he got mad and threw something down that damaged the trim in a bedroom, then when I shut down because that behavior freaked me out, he got mad at me and then proceeded to very loudly slam some doors, further scaring me. This was the day I moved in with him too, which sucks.
I decided to end it a few weeks ago when we got into our last ‘fight’. I had hurt his feelings by prioritizing a birthday party for my 92 year old grandpa over a weekend trip with his family, sort of shut down because I could see he was once again mad at me, then the next day when we ‘talked about it’ and I admitted I maybe handled that wrong, didn’t mean to make him feel like his family wasn’t important to me, etc.-it turned into him shouting and cursing (he said ‘oh no, you’re going to that f****** party now), me crying, and then me leaving the next morning in secret, breaking up with him over the phone a few days later and moving out with my family’s help shortly after.
He has yelled at me before, and sworn, in the heat of the moment maybe twice before, but in between there’s been dozens of incidents where he seems to get upset easily, and although he may not be yelling, his tone can be so incredibly hurtful. Sometimes it seems like he was a different person, or that he hated me-that’s how I would describe the tone.
Has anyone ever dated someone like this? I am struggling a bit walking away, but I am also confident that I don’t expect the worst treatment in my life coming from my partner. And that somehow he’s justified occasionally treating me in a way that he would NEVER do in front of anyone else, or that he would never get away with in any other area of his life.
Thank you for anything you feel that you can personally share with me, I appreciate it.
TLDR: I broke up with bf of two years over anger issues-seeming like a different person when angry, having the capability to shout and swear and come across as so hateful to me sometimes. Can anyone relate?
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2023.06.08 01:05 Nowwhat67 Overwhelmed!
Throwaway account for privacy...
For a while now, my elderly (90) father's wife (95) has been asking me to become more involved in my father's finances. Not easy, because he's always been a very private person. Slowly I have been getting more and more involved in helping sort things out. His health is declining rapidly - came up here yesterday (I live about 4 hours away) for his most recent heart cath. He is now more open to me helping with his finances. He has two rent houses and kept several credit cards to pay for supplies, etc., as needed. Today he agreed to allow me to help; I almost wish I hadn't asked. When I asked to see his credit cards, he had a stack of them, from an inch to an inch and a half thick, from a wide variety of lenders! There's no telling how many active credit card accounts he has, he is a very poor record keeper, some have balances, while he says others do not. There's no telling how much he has paid in interest and/or late fees.
I am taking over responsibility for one of his rent houses and he is getting out of the landlord business. We're hoping to sell it within a month or so. He rarely goes out, due to his health. He admits he probably only needs one credit card. My initial thought is to close every card except for one, but I don't want to do anything that really messes over his credit.
I have durable PoA. Any recommendations on how to go about systematically closing accounts and paying off balances? He admits he doesn't really care about his credit rating anymore at this point, but I don't want to inadvertently do damage when trying to help. We are in the U.S.
Thanks in advance!!!
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2023.06.08 01:05 Captain_Fidget Candlekeep Book of the Raven, help!
After DM'ing the two first Candlekeep stories and having a great time, I blindly committed to running The Book of the Raven as a one-shot, now I've sunk so much into trying to make the plot make sense that I'm gonna fix it, dammit. I'm a BRAND NEW DM, this is only the 5th session I've attempted to run, any advice helps. I decided to remove Shadowfell from the end and replace it with the lair of a night hag that corrupted Lady Brantifax, who killed her bedridden daughter to get a fresh start before moving back to the city. I changed the raven to be Sylphene's soul and made her very distinguishable. I'm struggling with a few loose ends, though. Act 1 I love Candlekeep, and I want the characters to begin there, with a clear starting objective. A white raven with blue eyes (Sylphene) drops off the book, and sits on a PC's shoulder the rest of the journey, she is adorable and I'm hoping they bond with her enough to solve her murder. They are hired by the Avowed to discover the origins and importance of the book and map. I'm not really sure why the Avowed would care very much about this book. Here's the issue with the book: I don't really know how to include the Vistani more into the story now that I've removed the portal from the story. I included a nice encounter at the end of Act 2 where the PCs have dinner with a Vistani caravan, and the matriarch hints that she is there to destroy evil relics for the wereravens and are meeting them at the top of Wyrm's Mark to perform a ritual and cast them into the volcano. She also gives some context about the raven that delivered the book that is now traveling with them. Maybe the hag is trying to open a portal and they are trying to stop her? Maybe they can come save the PCs if they insist on fighting the hag? Maybe I nix them altogether, but I have to replace the book with something else, hopefully more relevant. On their journey, they stop in Baldur's Gate at the Wide where they are either unwittingly sold the hag's heartstone (if they don't buy it, a Scarlet Sash snatches it from the vendor's hands). Foreshadowing for Act 3, the hag has secretly corrupted the wereraven, and wants to create a coven with her and Sylphene (she has reanimated Sylphene's body and wants to reunite her soul as the third member in the final act). They also encounter Lady Brantifax destitute and begging in Baldur's Gate, they get her physical description from a family portrait at the estate. Act 2 This is a lot of travel, opportunities for a chase and encounters. There's also opportunity to refine their objective, but I'm not sure how to do it. They finish the day camping with the Vistani, who give them some clues about the white raven being a restless soul. I'm thinking maybe having the hag approach them in their dreams that night to strike a bargain, but for what, idk. Act 3 As they start traveling, they meet the hag in-person, but she is in the form of a beautiful woman. If they have her heartstone, she will try to bargain for it, if not, she offers to give directions and gives them a coin to summon her whenever they're in trouble. If they end up trying to fight the wyrm or troll, she'll show up and offer to help. Now they owe her. A wolf appears and the spectre of Brorn shows up and chases it away. When they arrive at the manor, he is guarding it, but allows the PC's to pass after interacting with the Sylphene raven. In the Brantifax mansion, I'd like to make it clearer that they need to reunite items around the mansion with the graves. In a family portrait in the den, they see that Baron and Lady Brantifax are both blonde with blue eyes, Sylphene had albinism, but the youngest Heleuth had red curly hair and green eyes. The hag's coins are found inside the quarters of the gardener, who has red hair. Another coin is in Lady Brantifax' desk along with journal entries that mention a dirty old neighbor peddler woman that she once confided in. For the final reveal, I feel like it's shaky at best. I think I'm leaving the Scarlet Sash encounter and objective pretty much the same, aside from the revelation that one wereraven has been corrupted when the characters spot her holding a coin. Just saying their founder made a map to find the place seems like a really weak resolution to the main objective. Depending on who has the hag's heartstone, she will either have delivered it to the hag's secret lair, try to steal it from the PC's, either way revealing the main conspiracy (which I think is that the hag has made a coven to open a portal to Shadowfell???). Sylphene's grave is now a staircase down to the hag's lair, she has reanimated Sylphene's body and turned Baron Brantifax's into an undead dog minion. They need to negotiate with the hag, but if they don't care about Sylphene, then idk if it'll be worth it. I was thinking about introducing a risky game if they don't want to dialogue. I don't even know if they'll be willing to ascend into the lair, tbh, not sure how to handle that one. Final untangling of the plotlines here has also been challenging. Resolving the Candlekeep objective: There's still no concrete explanation for the Vistani book, its importance, or who drew the map. Resolving the murder mystery objective: If they explore the estate enough, there will be a lot of clues about the sequence of events that corrupted the Brantifax family. I need to think of a way to get them interested in reuniting the items to let the souls rest. If they don't care, then I think the final objective won't be as big of a deal. Resolving the BBEG objective: They can fight and kill the hag, negotiate a deal, or steal the heartstone back and ask the Vistani matriarch to destroy it. I'm not really sure what leverage the hag can have over the party to force a deal, though :/ I've invested so much into this already, it's ridiculous. Thanks for any help!
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2023.06.08 01:05 Exeggujobro I honestly don't get the amount of Koga Hate for the past couple of chapters
I understand that people want the lore and the interactions between the major plot characters, but Koga's reactions are honestly what I love about his character.
People are comparing him to Ohma and the others, but let's not forget:
- Ohma lived in The Inside for 18 years and literally fought daily and saw the most fucked up things known to man from a young age, and while he was aggressive and impulsive at the beginning of Ashura, he became way calmer and less insane by the end of it
- Himuro lived in The Inside until he was 15, and then he left and lived a chill life, becoming a bartender and then a fighter. And even he got pissed in the last chapter if anything he may have jumped Mukaku too if a few more seconds passed with Mukaku doing his crazy shit
- Retsudo's father was the owner of the Kengan Association for almost his whole life, so he most likely saw some shit, and he was also able to lead the Extermination Team at 21, so he's definitely been training for longer than most people.
Koga, meanwhile, was 20 when the series started and did not grow up in a fucked-up environment like the others. He didn't have to grow up as fast as the others, and he didn't have to deal with the cornucopia of fucked up shit that is The Inside, he was just an angry kid in a normal world for 20 years, with the only glimpse of anything like that being meeting Ohma when he was going through a Phase.
Along with that, one of the few genuine friends he had throughout his journey to become a Kengan Fighter, Ryuki, is missing, and he's only in The Inside for
Ryuki, everything else is secondary to him, including the ramblings of Mukaku, who to him is just Ryuki's insane grandpa. And while he has gone against the Worm at times, it was always to protect someone else or to settle something.
Also, being mad that he's attacking him at all because he's weak is idiotic when he has always punched above his weight, from Kokuro to Xia Ji to Jose, all the way back to before the story even started with Ohma. He's always had this desire to improve himself which, all the way back in Chapter 5 of Omega, was shown when he talked about how he was mad at his own weakness ever since he was a kid. He was impulsive and lashed out at anything or anyone that tried to change him, and while he has matured, he hasn't changed entirely and still wants to be stronger.
And lastly, people get mad at him for attacking Mukaku, but literally what else do you think he would do? Mukaku is literally saying that everything that happened with Ryuki, with all the times Ryuki has nearly died or gone insane, after all his suffering and trauma from Naidan and the Worm, all of it has all been because this old man has been raising him as the bait just so he can get another shot at The Connector. So how do you read all of Kengan Omega, see all this happen, and think that Koga is not gonna try to kick this dude's ass?
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2023.06.08 01:05 Otherwise-Host-2249 AITA for asking my husband to stay up and help with the baby?
A little background…. I am 7 weeks postpartum after an emergency c-section. There were some complications with both me and baby so we spent a week in the hospital after delivery making sure everyone was healthy enough to go home. My husband only had one week of paternity leave, almost all of which we spent in the hospital. So when we were discharged I was pretty much on my own in terms of caring for our little guy. ( Hubby works 4 12’s so he’s only home a few hours in the evening to help and he doesn’t help overnight since he operated heavy machinery) Let me also say that when he is home he’s super helpful and that is not taken for granted AT ALL.
Today he had a tooth extracted, it was something he pushed off over and over and so the extraction ended up being a little more work than they’d anticipated. When he comes home he tells me he thinks he’s gonna call it an early night and go to bed soon because his tooth hurt. The level of disbelief I felt can’t even be put into words. He had one tooth pulled and gets to throw in the towel on dad duties when I just had my whole abdomen sliced open and have been caring for a newborn 24 hours a day. I asked him to stay up and at least help get things together for the night (bottles washed and prepped, bath time, etc) and he said he doesn’t know if he can make it that long. Please also note I am very aware that his pain is valid and in a perfect world we’d all get a solid 8 hours but that’s not life with a newborn.
AITA for asking him to stay up and help?
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2023.06.08 01:05 Dramatic-Surprise251 10+ years of chronic health issues solved but still struggling mentally
I’m 27. When I was 13/14, I started having weird throat issues all the time. It felt like my throat had a lot of pressure in it, like a weird tension feeling, and the only thing that helped was when I ate/drank something or swallowed. This would help then it would come back a few minutes or so later. I had weird issues swallowing saliva too. I saw an ear nose & throat doctor about this and was told my issue was acid reflux. Doctor prescribed reflux medication and told me to sleep on an incline. I did those things for a while, but it didn’t help. Supposedly I was treating the issue and the doctor didn’t know why I wasn’t improving but told me to continue doing what I was doing to supposedly treat it. I saw some other doctors that weren’t sure either. I pretty much learned to just live like that but it was annoying and started to take over my life to the point that every day revolved around coping with my throat and dealing with the bad anxiety it was causing. I used to avoid things, had no life, had to make sure I always had something to drink to help my throat, and felt really stressed about the whole thing and how it was affecting me. On a side note, I also used to breathe mostly through my mouth as well. No one really knew, but I was really miserable all the time because of this stuff.
At 15, I started to feel like a brain fog on top of the throat issues. Something I’d never felt before. It was like my brain felt like mush all the time, no matter how much sleep I got. Like that feeling when you sleep really bad for a couple nights and feel like crap, except I was sleeping enough. Felt kind of spaced out constantly, couldn’t concentrate as well, I never wanted to do anything, felt apathetic, and just kind of crappy all the time. Wasn’t severe but was definitely impacting my day to day life. I went back to seeing doctors. Lots of doctors said there was nothing medically wrong with me and some even said that the brain fog (and maybe even the throat issues) were all psychological. I didn’t feel like that was it because my symptoms felt so real and physical but what did I know. I was prescribed antidepressants and doctors recommended I see a therapist for bad anxiety issues. I spent the next couple of years trying multiple medications, seeing therapists, and making other changes but nothing helped. I thought I was going crazy. In those few years that passed, I had slowly started to feel worse. By the time I graduated high school, the constant mental fog and tiredness were affecting me pretty bad. I felt stressed and anxious nonstop. I had almost no life during high school because of it and did just the bare minimum to get by. With lots of doctors telling me there was nothing physically wrong with me, I started to believe them about it being all mental. I thought it was something I was doing wrong personally. At this point I wasn’t even talking to my family about it as much since supposedly there was nothing wrong and it was all in my head. Especially when doctor after doctor were saying nothing was wrong and because my symptoms were mostly feeling tired all the time, what was I supposed to say? It felt like it was my personal fault for feeling the way I did. Everyone gave me the impression that my issues were because of me and I just needed to change my mindset and lifestyle and I’d feel better. Positive thinking, anxiety workbooks, deep breathing, more sleep, take antidepressants, therapy. I did every single thing doctors and therapists told me to do, but nothing helped. Doctors and therapists made me question my sanity every day. It was hell.
I was in no shape to go to college out of state, but I did. I ended up going because supposedly there was nothing wrong with me and I was trying desperately to believe it was all in my head like doctors and therapists and my family were saying. I just needed to change my way of thinking and lifestyle and that would cure the constant brain fog and tiredness and throat issues. So I pushed myself to go, hoping I’d sort it out. I spent the next 4 years slowly feeling worse, still seeing doctors but getting no legit answers. I'd go months and months at a time without seeing a doctor as I didn't know where to turn and had given up at times. I saw a doctor about sleep apnea but didn't seem to fit almost any of the symptoms. Stuff like waking up trying to get air, choking, stopping breathing, snoring, wasn't overweight, wasn't unhealthy, didn’t have a family history of it or other health issues. Still, I tried one of those moldable mouthpieces that’s supposed to help with sleep apnea but didn't see any benefit from it. So with all of this, I figured it’s probably not sleep apnea. I was so desperate, I was constantly trying all sorts of medications, supplements, and other weird things to try and help myself. I felt like I was losing my damn mind. My mental health was horrendous. Felt like crap 24/7. I literally felt stupid because my brain wasn’t working. Dealing with symptoms and figuring out what was wrong with me consumed my entire life. I would occasionally go to class after taking a big dose of stimulant drugs, but even those only did so much. No amount of caffeine pills, energy drinks did anything either. I was beyond that stuff helping. I experienced almost nothing enjoyable in those 4 years of college and had basically no life, really no friends, hobbies, nothing. Really the only experience I had during college was when I went on a study abroad trip but it was hell because I felt so awful the whole time. I had also joined a fraternity in the beginning of college but did almost nothing with them for the same reason. The mental tiredness had gotten so bad it felt like I was disconnected and living in a dream. Like I felt kind of drunk. I was so mentally and emotionally numb and exhausted I didn’t even feel human. Like I physically could not feel emotions and felt super spaced out. I was also still dealing with the throat issues. I’d get random dizziness, my vision got worse like being more sensitive to bright light and bad floaters in my eyes, almost no libido. I somehow managed to graduate college and finished feeling significantly worse than when I began. I was so miserable and had no one to talk to about what was going on. But I was at least glad that college was over, because it sucked horribly.
I spent the next year doing just the bare minimum to get by. About a year after college (2019), I had a sleep study done and results came back with moderate sleep apnea. For the first time I actually had an answer. Sleep doctor immediately prescribed a CPAP machine. Didn’t even bother to wonder why a young healthy person has sleep apnea to begin with, because it’s not normal. I spent the next 2ish years trying multiple machines, masks, changing all the settings, but only saw some improvement. Keeping the CPAP consistently on throughout the night was also a struggle in itself as it was super awkward and uncomfortable, even though I was desperately trying to make it work. When I was able to keep it on for 5+ hours a night I felt a bit better but it was really difficult to do so consistently. During this time I couldn’t really hold down a job, other than some really basic, short term jobs. And even those felt brutal. My relationships with everyone were affected pretty bad. I was a complete zombie because the tiredness was so overwhelming. It was as an amount of brain fog and exhaustion I didn’t know was humanly possible. I was making myself basically sick with stimulants that really weren't helping and even had a doctor at one point tell me that I should get genetic testing for depression or have my brain zapped with electric shocks. I luckily didn't go that route.
After two years of messing with machines, my sleep doctor then recommended I see a maxillofacial doctor to see what the underlying breathing issue was being caused by. The doctor recommended I get a custom mouthpiece made that shifts the lower jaw forward to help open the airway to prevent breathing issues while sleeping. The process of having it fitted and made took a couple months. I even took a “real” job during this same time because I had two different doctors telling me that this mouthpiece was likely to help me a lot. I felt like I couldn’t have gotten the mouthpiece fast enough. I ended up messing with the mouthpiece for months and had no benefit at all. Literally zero. The dentist who made the mouthpiece said that the mouthpiece wasn’t helping because I might just have “weak muscle tone” in my throat and that I should see someone called a myofunctional doctor to supposedly improve muscle tone in the throat and tongue. I looked into that and it seemed like total quack stuff so I didn’t do it and completely dropped that dentist that made my mouthpiece and suggested this. I then saw an ear nose and throat doctor and later did a sleep endoscopy with him where I was put to sleep and had my breathing monitored with a camera down my throat. The doctor said that my breathing issues were being caused by my throat and jaw and suggested that since the mouthpiece wasn’t helping, I could get surgery or have a device called Inspire surgically inserted into my chest and neck to artificially help breathing. I held off on that cause it sounded pretty extreme and thought there had to be something else. During this time I had to leave the job I should’ve never taken in the first place because I was so non-functional.
I pretty much gave up for months. I eventually scheduled an appointment with another ear nose & throat doctor (the same kind of doctor I saw when I was 13). I'd already seen many ear nose & throat doctors by this point but didn't know what else to do. Don’t remember how exactly it happened, but the connection was made that my issues were due to really abnormal nasal breathing. Something called nasal valve stenosis, where both sides of my nose were completely caving in and blocking most air, leading to crappy breathing, even when just breathing in lightly. This issue is worse during sleep and was causing my brain to “wake up” every time my nose had the obstruction. So I was struggling to breathe all night and I was slowly feeling worse as I was never getting good deep sleep. So the bad sleep every night just kept accumulating over the course of 10+ years. He also explained that my throat issues were a sign that my nose wasn’t functioning normally, which was causing airflow issues and a throat pressure feeling as a result. But weirdly the nasal issues weren’t being caused by my nose itself. There’s nothing actually wrong with my nose. It’s the middle part of the face that provides the base and support for the nose that is lacking the support needed to keep the nose open for normal breathing. Doctor said it’s really abnormal for nasal collapse to happen like this as a result of the face just not developing properly. It was just the way the middle of my face grew and changed over time, especially during puberty, that led to this. Doctor said it is called midface deficiency. It’s the area of the face just to the sides of the nose, below the eyes. Doctor said facial surgery is really what I needed but said nasal surgery could potentially help a bit and is less intense of a surgery, so I decided to go with that. Prior to the surgery the doctor had me wear a dilator in my nose at night to keep it open which helped incredibly. Everything finally made sense for the first time ever. I even recorded my sleep and sure enough I could hear myself struggling to breathe all night.
Last year (2022), I had nasal valve surgery. It took a long time to recover from surgery and I still have to wear something in my nose when I sleep to prevent it from pinching shut as the surgery only helped a bit. I will still have to look into facial surgery to address the underlying issue as my breathing is still not great during the day when I’m not wearing a dilator in my nose but at night I wear it and am good. Over time most of my issues have gone away. The slowly worsening constant exhaustion and brain fog and cognitive issues that started when I was a teenager. The severe anxiety and stress feelings I had since I was a kid. Throat issues gone. It was that obvious all along but untreated made my life constant torture to no end. Feeling horrible nonstop, slowly getting worse over the course of years, not knowing why, being told there was nothing wrong with me or that it was all psychological, trying all sorts of things with no benefit, and having my entire life be ruined was a mental hell I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I don’t feel like my teenage years and a good part of my 20s actually happened because I was in such poor health physically and mentally 24/7. I wish I had been able to see decent doctors earlier, but obviously that didn’t happen. I’m not even sure how I wasn’t able to make the connection myself. I think I was just so used to really bad breathing since I was young that I didn’t know it was abnormal and had no reason to think I had some weird issue. I still struggle with the mental effects of I think living like this for so long. The depression and frustration about it all. The why did I have to have this weird specific issue that destroyed my life, why couldn't doctors have helped me sooner like that very first ENT doctor I saw at 13 years old, why couldn't it have been any other identifiable health issue, etc. It's surreal to even think about how my life has been for so long. These issues consumed everything for more than 10 years so I guess it’s not that surprising that it still affects me mentally even after the fact. Thanks for reading and hopefully this can help someone out there.
Here's photos of my nose prior to surgery just breathing in slightly deeper than normal: https://imgur.com/aQWsJeX https://imgur.com/a/7NsNIWo https://imgur.com/a/qGXCBFw
submitted by Dramatic-Surprise251
to helpme [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:05 DanBrino Fable: switching from Cloud to Downloaded
I was playing the game fable using the cloud gaming, but because I have kids and constantly have to pause the game and step away for several minutes at a time, I thought it might be better to download the game and play it from there, Since I constantly find myself having to relaunch the game because I disconnected from the server.
The only problem is when I downloaded the game, my save did not come with it, and now it says that I am not connected to the xbox live servers, even though my console is connected (probably the game is looking for the 360 version).
Is there any way to get my save back? I don't have aa lot of time for gaming these days, and I was digging the game, but I can't go back and redo several hours of progress with a busy schedule.
Anyone know how I can get the salve data back?
submitted by DanBrino
to XboxGamePass [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:05 not_meganfox I went back home
After a year of moving away, I decided to go back home to visit my parents. My father and I haven’t been talking for a year but I felt really guilty about not visiting. I felt like if I didn’t at least try I’d regret it someday. So i eased into trying to be cordial with my father again and finally took the courage to go back home. I’m a flight attendant and i really wanted to relax and spend time with my parents so that when i would get back to work I’d feel at peace unlike my usual trips home where i stay at my bfs and spend the entire time partying and getting wasted. The week went by really quick. I had to catch up on bank work and updating documents mostly since I hadn’t been to my hometown in a year. My mother cooked me all my favourite food and also packed me tons of it to carry back with me. Everything was perfect. It was eventually time to leave and as the evening rolled in, all hell broke loose. I found myself having the ugliest fight with my dad. I was sobbing and so was my mother. The fight was almost identical to the last one that left us not talking for a year. It was about money. Or rather it was about how I should be “ashamed” of myself and that I’m a “disappointment” for not giving my parents any. The sad truth however is that my parents do not need money. They are more than comfortable. The person who needs that money is me. Now, my father retired years ago in his 40s apparently due to health reasons and we have been living off his savings and investments. Yes our standard of living changed when he left his job but we have always been comfortable. Since the one year that i got a new job that pays me decently all I’ve done was save. I think a zillion times before buying groceries so much so i keep putting things back on the shelf coz i convince myself i don’t need them. I don’t eat out or order take out. I don’t go out with friends. I literally walk around if i can instead of taking a cab and i live in a freakin desert. I have been saving because I’m so conscious of the fact that you never know what could go wrong and when this money could save a life quite literally. My father said things to me I won’t ever forget. He spoke about how much money he spent to feed me the week i spent home with them. I left that night. I didn’t eat another meal at my house that day. I went straight to the airport and sat there crying till i got a flight. I returned back home sadder and stressed than i would’ve imagined coming back from a weekend with my parents would be like. The details are too much to type here. But it breaks my heart to think that a parent can leave their child feeling like this. Idk why but posting it here just feels validating. Nobody would imagine what my father is really like because of how great people know him to be. I just feel like nobody would believe me. And that’s the loneliest feeling in the world.
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to daddyissuesclub [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:05 Tiowillie630 [WTS] Instant Pete's Pirate Life COLLECTION! 🏴☠️🏴☠️🏴☠️ PPK (knife), Ti V1 COIN, AND MINI COPPER COIN (ALL NEW)
Need funds for a down payment on a new car (my 2011 Subaru finally gave up the ghost 2 days ago).
All items were just received by me new from other sellers. Titile says it all. The V1 coin even comes in the PPL tissue paper.
$325 TYD PAYPAL F&F
Aaaaarrrgghh da pics and timey stamp! https://imgchest.com/p/m9yxr8gpyqn
submitted by Tiowillie630
to EDCexchange [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:05 hippygirlexi leiffa live rosin cart
| || |
WOW is all i have to say really, i have a high tolerance i use very frequently throughout the day so finding something that’s heavy hitting is hard, the first hit i actually didn’t think it pulled until i breathed out and had a big puff of smoke it was so smooth, definitely a sleepy cart it had me counting down the minutes until i could lay down LOL definitely recommend for people looking for heavy hitting indicas, over 1% ocimene too it tasted really nice, no fake flavors just sweet real dabs🙌🏻🙌🏻 first time trying anything from leiffa so i am impressed, definitely going to grab another submitted by hippygirlexi to PaMedicalMarijuana [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:04 Dull_Maximum_6289 Ex-wife called my best friend and took my boy away just before his 6th bday
D-day was Nov 21. Immediately filed for divorce and separation. I was officially a single father of 2 kids by July 22. Go thru my history if u wud like to get details. Here I am now....
I have been raising both my kids with my elderly parents. My mum is in decent health and shape and she stays at home looking after my kids. My dad plays his part in taking my daughter for swimming and son for his activities while I am at work. Kids have no complaints today. I am not dating yet but I have no complaints as life is better.
I went no contact immediately after d-day and any attempts by her to contact me were futile. In the past, she even asked my mum to ask me to call her for stupid reasons and sometime in December 22, she realised that I was not giving in. Now, 5- 6 months later, she took my boy just couple of days before his 6th bday. I then had to speak to my son to wish him on his bday thru my mums phone. I couldn't see my son on his bday. I hated the fact thst she was holding the phone while I spoke to my son. She does absolutely nothing for them. Now, she contacted my best friend and discussed things like my finances, company he is working for and some other things that make no sense. She was lying all the way to extract as much details as she could. For example, she made up a story rhat her credit score went down as I missed my mortgage payments. Not true. Infact, I had a call as recent as few months ago where the recovery agents were asking me to get her to pay for her cc.
Am I in trouble in the coming days, months or years? She is an absolute narcissist that I can confirm.
Edit: oops, forgot to mention. She is going to meet my friend soon is what she mentioned at the end of the call.
submitted by Dull_Maximum_6289
to survivinginfidelity [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:04 hotmessmama89 Former fiancé messaged 3 other girls and hid his intentions for months.
We already had enough issues before he cheated. I always stayed, because we had a kid together. I knew that wasn’t a good reason to stay permanently, but he’d always say he was willing to change, and I’d believe him.
In December, I caught him texting two other girls. There wasn’t any explicitly romantic or flirty lines crossed in the messages, but it was still inappropriate and went against our mutually agreed upon boundaries: no talking about relationship issues with opposite sex friends (unless maybe if they’re gay), and no lying about who you’ve been messaging. I never fully believed him when he said he didn’t have any intentions with these girls. In my mind, you don’t break boundaries that BOTH people in the relationship agreed to, unless there’s some sort of intention there, right? Right. I should have known I was right.
He treated me even worse after that. He totally checked out, used life stressors as an excuse for not working on himself or the relationship. I’d said I wanted counseling in December, but I wanted him to schedule it, to prove he cared. He didn’t even bother looking into it until I finally packed a bag one night after a big fight and drove 2 hours to my mom in MAY.
It’s only after he scheduled counseling that he admitted that he did have intentions to find out if he could be compatible with someone else when he messaged those girls, because he was unhappy and thinking about moving on. He kept me in the dark for 5 months, even though I was clear that it didn’t really matter if he didn’t technically cheat. Boundaries exist for a reason, and he broke the trust in our relationship when be broke those boundaries. My trust was already broken, yet he still insisted he didn’t cheat. How idiotic and self-serving. He completely emotionally neglected me during those 5 months when I didn’t know the truth.
I still felt like I didn’t know everything, so I did some digging. I dug for hours until I finally checked his Discord, and there it was. The first girl. He started talking to her in NOVEMBER. Their conversation was flirty, in such an immature way. He called her boo and fucking baby mama, while the actual mother of his child was in the other room. He confessed to her that he had a crush on her. There it was. The explicit line that he had crossed. What grown man even says he has a crush? He said he didn’t tell me about this girl because he’d fucking forgot about her since December. That’s so fucking stupid.
I needed space, so he’s been staying with his family most nights. We cohabitate sometimes. We’re affectionate and intimate. I don’t know if we should be, but I get lonely, and who else am I supposed to get those things from? I talked to other guys over text after we broke up, and it helped with some of the intrusive thoughts regarding the girls he messaged, but I lost interest in it pretty quickly. I didn’t think I was getting much out of it, other than some well-needed distraction and validation.
It’s been almost a month. We’re still doing counseling, but we’ve been broken up since. I’m still living in this house owned by his fucking family because I’m a SAHM, we can’t afford daycare, and I can’t get a job until we have someone to watch our kid. I told him I have no idea if I can forgive him, that he can’t expect me to commit to him right now, and he’s accepted that. He’s finally looking inward instead of just blaming his unhappiness on me. He’s changing, he’s finally changing. Is that supposed to make me feel good? It doesn’t.
I’ve got one foot out the door, and one foot in. I feel like I can’t forgive until I start healing, and I feel like I can’t heal until I no longer feel stuck in the position he put me in. I need a job and my own place in order to do that. I need my own life. I need to make friends again. I don’t know how to get any of that right now.
Cheating was the last thing I ever expected from him, because he always treated it as some special kind of evil. He didn’t physically cheat, so there’s that. So what? How do I know things wouldn’t have gone farther if he wasn’t caught?
I always maintained I could never forgive a cheater. I think the decision would be made for me if he had crossed physical lines. I don’t know how I could let him touch me again. He got caught so fast, how do I know he wouldn’t have engaged in a full-on emotional affair if given enough time? The fact that he could cheat on me, go on to treat me even worse, then have the audacity to say shit like, “I’ve done nothing but respect you,” or “I’ve tried everything and nothing I do is good enough,” when he knew he was keeping me in the dark. I feel gaslighted. I feel emotionally abused. Sure, he’s changing, but it all just makes me sick to remember.
I don’t know what the goal of this rant is. I don’t have anyone to talk to other than the counselor. I’m doing good, all things considered. The old me would have let this take me down, but I’m still standing. There’s just days like today where I feel really sad about all the disrespect and mistreatment I’ve endured, before, after and during the cheating. And then the sadness turns to anger because I DIDN’T FUCKING DESERVE ANY OF IT
submitted by hotmessmama89
to survivinginfidelity [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:04 Floralbutterfly One person out of a 5 person interview gave me bad feedback. How likely am I to still land this job?
I interviewed with a company where I really wanted to land a job at. There was a total of 5 interviews with different people. Each interview had a different topic, one was technical, one was cultural, etc..
I just received feedback from the HR recruiter saying that 4 out of the 5 people though I did well and was a good fit for the team, and these were the people that I would be working directly with. However one person who is on a different team gave me bad feedback.
The bad feedback was for the interview regarding relationships with stakeholders. They made a comment that they felt like I didn’t understand how their team worked with the team that I was applying for. I was honestly surprised as I was told this interview was in regards to relationships with stakeholders, not about their team. They also never asked me questions about their team, just generic questions regarding how I communicate and manage relationships.
I shared my opinion with the HR recruiter and even she said she and the others were shocked at that feedback.
I am so nervous because this is a job that really want and I’m now scared that this one interviewer has ruined my chances. The HR recruiter said they are still in the interview process and would get back to me in a few days.
How likely is it that I will not get an offer based on that one persons feedback of me?
submitted by Floralbutterfly
to recruitinghell [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 01:04 M-T-T-W-A Should i reach out to my ex-situationship
Hi, so i need your advice. I've talked to a guy for about 3 months everyday. He was in my class, our conversations were so fun and i felt a true connection to him. The problem was eventhough we saw eachother in class and texted the same time. He seemed to not dare to talk to me in real life. At first i thought he was just very shy because i asked him "why don't you talk to me at school". He didn't really gave an explanation so i brushed it off and made jokes about it. For example when he would text me he got to class, i would say yeah to bad you won't talk to me with laughing emoji's. It really bothered me because eventhough he didn't try to talk to me i tried, by making eye contact or engaging in his friendgroup (he asked me to befriend his friends). Because of that we had 2 real conversations and i loved it. I truly felt at ease with him and we laughed a lot. Because of that i thought he would now be over his shyness and would talk to me. He couldn't, I tried to make a lot of eye contact and be in his pressence. But he didn't seemed to pick up on that. I really didn't like it because it seems like he could talk to anybody (even other girl classmates) but not to me. I don't understand, does he like me or not? Surely he can't be that shy, we had face to face conversations and facetimed a few times.
It was really getting to my head and i had enough of it. So i texted him a serious text, which said " idk what we are doing because we are texting everyday but can't even speak face to face. Eventhough i tried to stand in your pressence you don't give me any look and seemed too busy talking to your friends not even saying hi (btw his friends always say hi) so you obviously don't want to talk so i will stop initiate a conversation" to which he responded "yow yow i'm at work i will read it after i'm done with work" so he finished work and said i will get back at it. Which he didn't, he just tried to talk about something else (a task from school, sending meme's...).
After that we didn't have consistent talks anymore but he would still text me everyday. We both knew we had to talk but he didn't. One day i truly didn't think he was going to text me (he was at a birthday party) but he did. He sent me a reel which said "sent this to the most beautiful girl you know, it will make her very happy". I really didn't understand it seemed like we were breaking this off but then he sent me this. I anwsered very excited and said thankyou this really means much to me. To which he just liked my message.
I felt like he really gives me mixed signals and i wanted it to stop. The perfect opportunity came because he reposted a girl on his story. (He always post his friends on his story, he even posted me one time) The girl had the same background in her photo as him the day before. To which i assumed he went on a date with her but i forgot he went to a birthday party (were all his friends went to and made the same pictures). Though i got heated and texted him "whoah you are so funny, the day before you were saying i'm the most beautiful girl, but you just posted a girl who you been with" his respone was "you are stupid that was a birthday party and everybody made the same photo's" I anwsered "no i got you, it's okey we are just 2 different people" he just ignored it. And we haven't talked since. I was mad and didn't want to see his stories or anything so i just deleted him from my following and unfollowed him. Then after a few hours I de-activeted my account. (I couldn't deal with it) He then talked to my friend and asked what was wrong because he thought i blocked him. My friend didn't say anything to me for 5 days and just answered him with idk. My shitty friend knew everything but didn't say a thing. Anyway I didn't blame her because eventhough he has my number he didn't reach out to me.
Now i really miss our conversations and tried to talk to other boys. But i have no connection to anyone of them.
Did I overreact and should I reach out to him? He said a few times that he really appreciated our conversations and felt at ease with me. (He did have a lot of things on his mind, his uncle died, exams, work and a lot of birthday parties...)
submitted by M-T-T-W-A
to Advice [link] [comments]