Demographics:

• Gender: Male
• Race/Ethnicity: Indian (Asian)
• Residence: Midwest
• Income Bracket: Upper Middle Class
• Type of School: Semi-Competitive Public
• Hooks (Recruited Athlete, URM, First-Gen, Geographic, Legacy, etc.): N/A

Intended Major(s): [Varies by School] Political Science, Environmental Studies, and/or South Asian Studies
Academics:

• GPA: 4.0 UW, 4.4 W
• Rank: 9/~500
• AP/Honors/Dual Enrollment: 11 APs (Including Sr. Year), 8 Honors, 2 DE
• Senior Year Courseload: AP Chemistry, AP Statistics, AP Spanish, AP Seminar, Intro to Psych DE, and Principles of Micro DE

Standardized Testing:

• SAT: N/A
• ACT: 34 (R: 29, W: 35, M: 36, S: 36), 36 Superscore (R: 35, W: 35, M: 36, S: 36)
• AP: AP World (4), APUSH (5), Calc AB (5), Calc BC (5), Lang (5), Bio (5), U.S. Gov (5)
• Other (ex. IELTS, TOEFL, etc.): N/A

Extracurriculars/Activities:

• President, Student Council (9-12)
• Senator and Party Chairman, Boys State (12)
• President, Asian American Nonprofit (9-12)
• Captain, Speech and Debate Team/Honor Society (9-12)
• Legislative Intern, State House of Representatives (11-12)
• Department Lead, Education Nonprofit (10-11)
• Senior Officer, Spanish Honors Society (11-12)
• Senior Board Member, School District Equity Board (11-12)
• Senior Staff Writer, School Publications (11-12)
• Fellow and Community Builder, Civic Engagement Nonprofit (10-11)

Awards/Honors:

• Coca-Cola Scholars Regional Finalist (Semifinalist on Application)
• U.S. Senate Youth State Finalist
• National Merit Commended Scholar
• AP Scholar with Distinction
• Speech and Debate State Finals Qualifier

Letters of Recommendation:
AP Lang Teacher (9/10): Really, really strong. I didn't read the exact letter for my college applications, but I did read a modified version for some scholarships; it provided a lot of insight into my personality and who I am as a person, rather than merely repeating my resume!
AP Gov Teacher (7/10): He really liked me, but I read the letter and it was a lot of repeating my resume. Some lines were really powerful about my work ethic and dedication, though!
Counselor (7/10): He was brand new this year, so we didn't know each other well; however, we were quickly able to form a solid relationship, and he is now one of my biggest supporters!
I also sent a recommendation from my AP Bio teacher (7/10) to MIT, Emory, and UMich, one from my principal (8.5/10) to UMich and Emory, and one from my art teacher (9/10) to Harvard, Duke, and MIT.
Essays:
Common App Personal Statement (8.5/10): Used a childhood game as a metaphor for my growth from perfectionism and embracing vulnerability. Revised extensively with my AP Lang teacher, who rarely gives compliments, but said that it was one of the best that she's read.
Supplementals (8-9.5/10): Writing comes a little bit more naturally to me, and I am proud of all of my supplements. I revised extensively with my AP Lang teacher as well, so I know that I submitted my best work to all of my schools. My Yale ones were by far my favorite!
I really do believe that my essays were the strongest part of my application and likely what differentiates me from many of my peers.
Interviews:
I received interviews from all of the schools that offered them except for Stanford and Vanderbilt. I think that I did all of them well (minus Harvard), and would probably rate them as Yale (7/10), Georgetown (9/10), MIT (9/10), Northwestern (8.5/10), UPenn (8/10), Harvard (6/10), and Duke (8.5/10).
Decisions (Indicate ED/EA/REA/SCEA/RD):
Acceptances:

• Miami University (EA): Honors College, Semifinalist for Presidential Scholarship (Full Ride)
• The Ohio State University (EA): Honors College, Morrill Scholar (Full Tuition), Eminence Fellow (Full Ride)
• University of Michigan (EA)
• Vanderbilt University (RD): Chancellor's Scholar (Full Tuition), MOSAIC Recruit
• Georgetown University (RD)
• University of Pennsylvania (RD)
• Stanford University (RD)

Waitlists:

• Northeastern University (RD)
• Northwestern University (RD)
• Emory University (RD)
• Duke University (RD)

Rejections:

• MIT (RD)
• Harvard University (RD)
• Yale University (SCEA; Defer to Reject)

Reflection:
My results are a testament to exactly how random this process is. I would never in a million years have predicted my results to turn out like this. I also think that I was under the false notion that if I put my best foot forward always that I would be getting into these top-tier schools, but that's simply not the case. Here are a few takeaways of mine from this process:

1. Revising too much is a problem too: I poured my heart and soul and hours into my Yale essays because that has been my dream school for nine years. To this day, even after being rejected, I am the proudest of that application because I feel like it is the best writing that I have ever produced. But I was still rejected. Meanwhile, I spent far less time polishing essays for Stanford, which I submitted two hours before the deadline, and was accepted. I think I almost overdid my essays, revising and polishing them to the point where they were beautiful pieces of writing that borderline sounded fake.
2. Interviews matter: Throughout this process, a lot of people have told me that I shouldn't worry if I do badly on an interview, and that as long as I wasn't showing red flags, I'd be ok. But I think that interviews are becoming increasingly important. Take a look at A2C: students these days are truly extracurricularly accomplished and producing beautiful essays and attaining excellent recommendations. How do you differentiate them? At schools like Harvard and Yale, where I had truly mediocre interviews, I was rejected. I'm not sure if that is a causal relationship, but take that as you see fit.

So about a few months ago when the college semester began I was pretty confident in myself and I asked a few girls out. I got rejected by all of them because they were taken. I was bummed a bit but eventually found a girl I thought things were going well with but after some time I got the feeling she was avoiding me. It made me overthink a lot wondering what I did wrong. I wasted so much time on her.
Around that time my schoolwork stress started picking up and I got some exam results back which despite me studying so fucking hard I didn’t do well. It was a massive blow to my confidence.
It doesn’t help at the same time while I was pursuing her another girl was showing interest in me but I just didn’t see it. I still feel like a complete idiot for it and I lost contact with her cuz she stopped showing up where I usually saw her. The couple of times I could’ve lit a spark with her I just fumbled and didn’t do anything.
So yeah I hate the fact I have been making like no progress for the past month or so. I don’t really have many people I can go to in my life for dating advice but I found this one guy online who seemed reasonable and he didn’t seem like a snake oil salesman as he had concrete proof that he was actually successful with girls.
He said the red pill shit is garbage and the way to get dates or sex is to just ask a lot of girls out as well as improve your appearance. I’ve done the appearance part but asking girls out feels like such a mentally hard task now. I can talk to girls just fine and have been recently but actually asking for their number I just can’t bring myself to do. I’m so afraid of looking creepy or weird, maybe it’s because I just want something casual? Maybe it could be cuz my sex drive is through the roof these days since I have been in recovery for porn addiction? I have no idea.
It’s like these days despite this claim having no basis in reality I am repulsive to women.
How do I get my confidence back? At some point I think maybe I don’t even need confidence I’ll just be like “meh it is what it is” and do it. I don’t mind being rejected I just want to feel like I’m making progress again.

I’ll start with what should be obvious. The only issue here is on housephone’s end. He’s ashamed about his homosexuality, end of story.
All you idiots are speaking on assumptions that you can’t prove and don’t know and are just as likely to be wrong. If you have receipts then post them. Nobody gives a shit about your conspiracy theories.
Everyone saying he should have deleted it have never run a business successfully and have no understanding of basic finances apparently….
Do you know what the talent, labor and staff cost him to film that episode? You don’t know where he’s at financially no matter what the appearance may be.
Adam called housephone before uploading and housephone still denied it because of his shame and pretended she was lying.
Adam still went out of his way to tell his editors to go ahead and clean it up ( this isn’t free moron, he came out of his pockets extra money for this )
The edit wasn’t perfectly clean and people put it together. Welcome to real life. Shit happens and that’s that. At this point he’s still operating under the assumption that it was BS because of what HOUSEPHONE told him.
Y’all acting like he’s supposed to read between the lines like housephone his girlfriend and shit is crazy. If I ask my partner something I expect he’s gonna shoot straight with me, period.
House phone is the biggest piece of shit next lush on this podcast by a mile. Don’t get me started and ain’t shit changed over on their new pod, ask blazy lol.

I was picking up my last delivery of the day and on my way there I get a message saying “please get me two big cups with ice water”. I asked the cashier if I could get those cups and she said she would have to charge me. I message the customer and tell him that they would have to charge me for two large cups as if they were drinks. He said “you can’t even get me two cups of water? It’s water. Water is always free.” I told him that’s what the cashier was telling me. On my way there he messaged again and said to leave the food on top of the red lawn mower. His order required a pin and so I asked him for it and he told me he doesn’t want to give me it. There were two lawn mowers and I put it on the one closest to the front door. He sends me a message again and says “that’s the wrong one. Come back and put it on the right one.” I put it on top of the other one and tell him to have a nice day. He then sends me the pin and says he doesn’t like that I’m asking him for a pin. I already knew he was giving me a bad rating so I didn’t entertain it further. I pressed delivered and sure enough when I got home there was the bad rating…smh

Hey all, I would love to make at least one genuine, long-term friend. I'm a huge nerd: I'm obsessed with Pokemon, I play some tcgs, have a PS4 (though don't play much), I love LotR and other fantasy stuff, I love Marvel/DC, binging TV shows, just chilling and tons of other things. I've tried responding to people's posts on here with no real luck. Most don't respond, the rest barely respond. I get that making friends online is tough. But if two people are genuine and have similar interests then something good can come of that! I don't care if your male or female. I'm not a perv just trying to be dirty or get off to some random chat. I do ask that your 18+ because I only want to chat with adults. I'm on the east coast USA but you can be from anywhere! Feel free to DM me, especially if you're in the same boat as me!

This is gonna be a long post but I wanna make this thread for those who have had just had a similar injury to mine and are feeling depressed, like there's no end in sight. I might delete this thread after a while, but we'll see. So I'm gonna try and make this easy and clean to read and break it up in sections.
TL:DR? It sucks now, but you will bounce back. 50% of that will be on you too because you cannot be complacent once you're allowed for partial or full weight bearing. You gotta put in the work to get better, but you will be back to normal. I promise you.
Break Day: Jan 2nd, I was biking on a trail I usually go to in my city with this awesome new Specialized Sirrus X3 I just got two months ago and was still breaking it in. I got to a small walk bridge that had a 70 degree left turn. I was going 18km/h which is my average speed. I overcalculated the turn by being too cocky and swayed my body to make the turn at my speed because I was feeling edgy that day. Thing is, the tires are not built for that on this type of bike. They're not MTB tires or wide enough to grip for those kinda turns.
So I began to lose control and fight or flight mode kicked in because there was a small river with rocks next to me on my right side that I didn't wanna fall into. Somehow in this fight or flight mode response, my feet locked on the pedals and somehow, that broke my fibula. I could feel this dull ache getting more painful by each second until I fell off on my left side. The pain felt like a nasty ache combined with pulling a muscle, a good 8.5/10 on the pain scale. I was in shock. I couldn't breathe once I fell. I never had this type of shortness of breath before. I had to get up immediately because I didn't know wtf just happened.
Getting up was that same pain, increased to a solid 10, but I got up fast and it went back to 8. Now, for my next challenge. This trail I was on? It wasn't close to any road. I couldn't get an ambulance there because there was no access for them to come there. I had to power through and walk. Either direction had a steep 90 degree incline up. I was not looking forward to that. I called my mom to come meet me by a checkpoint in the road near that trail so we can go to my car and then head to the ER. Walking absolutely hurt. I was trying so hard to fight the pain but had to stop every 5 minutes to relax. A guy on a bike then stopped and gave me this massive ProTip that I didn't think of doing in the moment because I was in shock. He said I should lower my saddle and peddle off the floor with my foot and leave my bad foot hanging in the air. That worked! Unfortunately, I couldn't do that when I got to that steep 90 degree hill climb. Thankfully this was all concrete so I had grip but it hurt like HELL climbing that. But there was no other way to do it. And keep in mind I'm a big guy too. 270lbs at 5,11. I probably made this injury worse walking on my broken ankle. But, you kinda have no choice in situations like this and you gotta make the best of it.
Anyway, we head to the ER. They x-ray me and tell me I'll possibly need surgery and that it'll take 4-6 weeks to heal the bone, but it is a fracture through and through. This is what a fibula fracture looks like. It's hard to see unless you zoom in and the doctor did say he's seen a lot worse than that, but it still sucked that I might need surgery. So he booked me to see an ortho specialist the very next day and got a temporary cast put on my leg. The one thing I noticed on the night I was sleeping after my ankle break was that I was peeing a lot. More than usual during the night. It was crazy. Maybe from the pain and shock wearing off? Anyway.
Jan 3rd: Time to see the specialist. He looked my foot and x-ray and confirmed I need surgery with a plate and screws. My world turned upside down when I heard that because the surgery was still sort of up in the air before this visit. I was hoping I could just heal in the cast because he did say he's seen a lot worse. That gave me some peace of mind. But it wasn't meant to be. Surgery it is! I got a call the same day to book me in for the 9th of Jan early in the morning. This is my first major surgery ever at the ripe young age of 33. I thought this would never happen to me, but here we are. I was so nervous because I watched a stupid movie called Awake where this guy has a major cardiac surgery and he becomes conscious while under general anesthesia and he can feel everything being done to him but can't move until it's over. That movie has legit created that fear in me since I watched it over a decade ago.
Jan 4th to 8th: I'm still processing the accident, find it hard to accept that I've ruined my life. If only I didn't go fast that day. Kept repeating that in my head, because this was on me. This ankle break was my fault and even now as I'm fully recovered I still can't forgive myself for being so careless. It's a lesson I will take to my grave with me. The lesson of taking things for granted. This stupid ankle break cost me my job that I was about to start on the 15th. It was a good gig too. Three weeks of work, one week off because it was in the film industry. It was a 9 month contract from Jan to September and would be renewed if the series got renewed. I loved it because the one week they give off would be great for me to get back on cycling, dating or doing more freelance work as a side hustle in addition to this job. But of course that job required me to be on my feet and that was impossible at the moment. Great. Fuck me, right?! It can't get any worse, right? Wrong. I also had to miss my best friends wedding the very next Sunday, a day before my surgery. I also had to cancel a date I had that was promising with someone I was talking to on Hinge. It's like blow for blow at this point. I'm just rolling with the punches.
This was a very rough week for me. The mental pain from being depressed, feeling useless and ruining my life is so much worse than the physical pain because physical pain is temporary but mental pain leaves the most amount of scars on your psyche that can last a lifetime. I was crying every night for hours on end thinking this is it. I've ruined my life. How am I gonna recover from this? The biggest worry for me was now I would have to eat through my savings until I could walk again for in-office work. And it's not like I didn't apply to work from home jobs, because I did just that for weeks on end with no luck. I was either overqualified or I didn't have the skills for it. Overqualified for a data entry job? Are you kidding me?!
So I spent this week just wallowing in my sorrow and googling for hours on end this type of injury, recovery time, surgery complications and browsing this very sub looking at success and recovery stories. This sub has really given me a peace of mind and has a really good supporting community. I love you guys. I wouldn't have been able to make it mentally without you. But I also owe everything to my mom who cared and supported me in this fucked up moment of my life. She got me through this and I wanna get a vacation birthday present when I find a job. It's the LEAST I could do.
Jan 9th: Surgery Day. I'm getting processed in the hospital and I'm nervous as all hell. I keep thinking of that stupid movie, even tell my mom I love you as I get wheeled away to the operating room in case something bad happens during mid-surgery. The other worry for me was aspiration. You know why tell you to not eat or drink anything, even water, for 12 hours prior to your surgery? Because you can get aspiration from having food and liquid in your stomach coming up and choking you. There's a very small chance of dying because of that and if you don't die, your lungs and esophagus get damaged from the doctors trying to save you from choking on your own vomit. So I had that running through my mind as I enter the operating room.
But it all went well. I woke up remembering nothing during the surgery because I was a medical coma from the anesthesia. The only thing I remember is the mask being put on and being told to think happy thoughts. It worked. And let me tell you, waking up felt so incredibly good. It's like I had the best sleep I've ever had in my entire life. It was so calming. Even breathing slow felt so damn good. I kept thinking I wanna be in this state 24/7. If this was an over the counter drug, I would be addicted to it instantly. They made me wait two more hours in the hospital to see that all my vitals are stable and then they released me and gave me a script for 50 Percocets.
Jan 10th to Mid March: Post surgery x-ray I'm part robot now! I'm part of the X-Men academy! It was time to stop feeling sorry for myself on this road to recovery and kept myself busy by working on passion projects from home and applying to remote jobs. I kept saying to myself, "it could have been worse" and that helped. The crutches I got took some time getting used to but luckily I have good upper body strength from working out at home and I returned to that. I even debated getting a knee scooter but two weeks into the crutches, I already got used to it. Plus it's not like I was going anywhere outside so I didn't need it! One thing that really helped me getting around the house was a computer chair on wheels. I used my good leg to peddle myself to the kitchen, washroom and back.
The first three days after surgery were the worst for physical pain. They gave me nerve blockers but they started wearing out around the same day of surgery, but at night time and I was reluctant to taking Percocet because it's an opioid and I was scared of being addicted to it. Plus, it also gives you constipation. In the end, I took them for 3 days because the pain won my will to resist the drugs. They were very helpful. I got good sleep and they kinda felt really awesome. It's hard to describe but it they kinda numb you. You don't feel dizzy, but sort of buzzed. It's similar to an alcohol high but different still. I took them for 3 days then switched to aspirin because my pain was going down by a lot after that. But I would say the post-surgery pain was way worse than the ankle break pain. A solid 9 or 10/10 in those first three days. I felt like my leg was on fire and even my bones were sensitive to any movement, it was so weird. But I powered through. And you will too. But just know, the pain always wins. Take the painkillers.
I was starting to get used to my predicament, but the most difficult part was the shower. Because I had to be non-weight-bearing for the next 3.5 weeks until I got my boot, the shower was a pain in the ass because I couldn't get my cast wet at all. So I bought this plastic set of bags from amazon and putting that on and off, plus getting a medical chair to sit in the shower, which was already a small space, was a massive pain in the ass. But you adapt. You get used to it. You find a routine and shortcuts in your misery and it works. I kept doing my upper body workouts and walking with my crutches so I could get some circulation going because the swelling was INSANE.
Now I'll admit that I didn't elevate my leg always like I should have so that's on me. I just can't sit in bed for hours, it drove me crazy in the first week doing that. I needed to move or be at my computer keeping my mind busy or I'd be depressed and crying again. Feeling useless is one of the worst feelings you can possibly imagine. I needed to stay busy. I thought playing videogames all day would help but that just made my depression worse. It doesn't help. Maybe if I was younger in my teens that would have been a godsend but when you're eating through your savings, your biggest worry is getting employment. So I kept gaming to a few hours at night and that helped.
Mid Feb: The cast is off and now I enter into my boot. Those classic aircast boots with the pumps on the side. I still had 3 weeks left of being non-weight bearing but the boot was a damn godsend! The cast was worse for me because it felt like a torture device. It got so hot in the cast and of course the itching. I was so desperate that I even bought a plastic scratching kit for casts that have reach. You're not supposed to do that but I couldn't help it. The cast is great because you can take it off during the day and keep it on during the night. I didn't inflate it all the time because that shit hurt like hell and made my swelling worse. So I just tightened the straps a little and only used the pumps when I had to go outside for something. I had the boot on in my sleep because doc was afraid I might toss and turn and snap my hardware. We don't want that! But I slept on my side with pillows and it worked out fine. At this point I was just counting down the days until I could walk again.
Early March: Follow up X-rays look great! My bone has healed well and I was cleared for full weight bearing and to start physio. I still had to be in my boot and walk with the support of crutches. That was a weird and interesting feeling but it felt so good to be able to walk again. I cried in joy. It felt like pins and needles at first. My mind was super reluctant to step on my feet even in the boot. It's crazy how your mind works, getting you accustomed to not using your foot and being scared to use it again when you absolutely can. But I tried it out. Slow and steady wins the race. That's what my physiotherapist said. He wasn't too happy that I didn't start physio earlier because I was talking to someone here on Reddit who had an ankle break in three places, way worse than my injury, yet started physio 4 weeks after their surgery.
But anyway, physio went great. After the first initial session, I took my boot off and started walking barefoot but with the support of the crutches. Definitely had pains in my foot I never thought I would get but that's because it was asleep for so long and your muscles atrophy. I kept walking around, doing leg stretches to get the blood flowing and got a little more religious about icing my ankle. That helped. My next PT session really helped me with a few stretches. By this point, I could walk without the crutches. It felt so freeing getting this freedom back. I listened to the physiotherapist and did those stretches at home and they really helped a ton with pain relief and getting my range of movement back in my ankle.
He told me to take it easy but I couldn't do that because I needed a job. I didn't overdo it because I didn't want to cause any more damage but I did extra workouts on top of the stretches he gave me and pushed myself. Now the pain was going all the way to my knee and back of my knee, all around really. My next physio session, he was more concerned with that than my ankle because I was making fantastic progress on my ankle. He said this knee pain was residual collateral damage from being stationary for so long. Makes sense really. So he told me to start using my stationary bike and also walking in the swimming pool, in addition to the stretches' and icing I was already doing. This helped A LOT. Because you're almost in Zero G weightlessness in the water, you can do a lot more. So I walked and swam some laps and day by day, I was recovering.
I pushed myself one day by walking outside for an hour. It hurt like hell in my knee, but I needed to get used to being back to normal-ish. After that walk, I wanted to face my fear and do stairs next. I have stairs in my building so I used that as practice and of course held on to the railings. I felt more pain going down the stairs than going up the stairs, but I did a few reps just so I could get a sense of what my leg can do and not do and see what works.
Next physio session, he recommended I get some trainers and showed me specific models from Asics to get for stability and support. Up to this point, I had some cheap Walmart running shoes, but soon as I got the proper shoes on, it was like night and day. He also said my progress was night and day.
March 31st: My last x-ray! My surgeon is extremely happy as am I. He said it looks fantastic and if the hardware bothers by my one year anniversary of the surgery, I can remove it. The recovery time will be helluva lot faster than when you get the hardware. I think I might do that and get it removed. I'm walking right now and I feel like I'm at 95% back to normal. The other 5% being that my ankle is not where it was pre-accident and I only get pain in a small corner of my knee now than what I had even two or three weeks ago. The swimming pool, stretches and stationary bike are super duper helpful for my recovery. I feel like I can even go cycling outdoors now, which I very much want to.
Crazy, right? You'd think I'd ditch the bike altogether but it's not the bike's fault. It's a tool. I used this tool carelessly. That will ALWAYS be on me. The reason I cycle is so I can lose weight and I hope I can do a century this year. That's my challenge for this year. Of course, I still get swelling in my ankle when I'm standing on my feet for a few hours but my doc said this would be normal for the next 6-8 months and even when the temperature changes, because of the type of metal in my hardware. Whatever, no big deal. I'll just ice it and be good to go again. The pain I get in my ankle now is exclusively from the hardware rubbing up against the skin. So if that continues after January 9th, 2024, I'm gonna get this hardware taken out but I am definitely keeping it and framing it as a memento of this dark period in my life and hopefully this taking things for granted lesson prevents me from breaking any other bones in the future.
Present day and final thoughts: I have one more PT session two Mondays from now and then my PT said I'll only need maybe one per month because he's very impressed with my recovery. Hell, I'm very surprised I recovered so well because reading the threads here, people go to PT twice a week but I only ever did it once per week. But my PT guy is extremely good. He goes above and beyond the one hour mark that you pay for and I remember from my first few sessions lasting almost 3 hours straight without charging for me it. He really gives a shit and I'm gonna give a shit too by offering him photography and video services, on the house, for anything he needs.
I'm still jobless at the moment, but I have three or four promising leads that I have yet to hear back from. This was another blow for me. Losing my job at the stat of all this. I remember during my recover I had a very promising job lead. They liked me and they were even OK with me being in the boot and on crutches. The job was in my city too which was a huge time and money saver. But they kept stringing me along telling me how much they like me out of the small pool of candidates of the final interview, only to ghost me in the end. That was another big blow to my mental health. I really thought I had it in the bag. Everything went well with all the interviews and even the HR lady at my final interview had an ankle break 10 years ago so I thought that for sure would get me job because we can relate to each other on that level. I suspect she wanted me there but the other lady who would be working on my team decided against it. Still sucks being ghosted though. For a corporate company, they could have at least told me it was a no. I even emailed them to follow up but they still ghosted me. Very unprofessional.
But there's no sense looking back, I'm only looking forward now. I'm applying like crazy on Indeed and Linkedin and hopefully these 4 leads go to something but I'm not gonna put in all the eggs in one basket because of my previous experience of being burned. I just hope I get something because this month will be the last month I can cover my bills. After that, my mom said she would help. I don't wanna get to that point. I hate that feeling of uselessness. I wanna pay for my own shit. I'm a grown ass man goddamnit!
But I owe her a big vacation, I couldn't get through this without her. I love her to death. Well, that's it. This is the end of the post. Thanks for bearing with me. If you read this all the way through, you're a trooper but I suspect you have nothing better to do because you're still in recovery so thanks for reading! I promise you, you WILL bounce back from wherever you are in your recovery. It is normal to be angry, to cry, to be depressed, to feel useless and lose all hope. Those feelings will come in waves and they will pass too once you accept your situation. Keep your mind busy. Do chores, work on a computer, do whatever you did before the accident to keep your mind busy and time will fly and you'll be back on your feet before you know it. Plus, this makes a really good party story to tell or one for your grandkids! Certainly makes a great dating story! Surgery scars are sexy!
And thanks to this kick ass sub for pulling me through my darkest days and giving me peace of mind and calming my worries. I have never seen a more supporting community than this one and I've been on and off on Reddit for a decade now. Seriously, you guys all fucking rock. I love you.

My relationship with my parents (43F) (43M) is far from ideal, as a 15-year-old. Although I've always been a good role model for my younger siblings (13F) (6F), things took a turn for the worse when I was in the third grade.
When I was younger, all of my classmates seemed to have their own phones, but I didn't. My parents believed that I was too young to handle the responsibility, and they worried that I would become addicted to the device. Although I understood their reasoning, I still felt left out whenever my friends would pull out their phones to play games or send messages during our free time.
I would often watch enviously as they laughed and played games together, wishing that I could join in on the fun. I tried to talk to my parents about how I was feeling, hoping that they would understand and buy me a phone, but they didn't seem to take my concerns seriously.
As time passed, my jealousy grew stronger and more difficult to control. I felt like an outsider whenever my friends would gather around their phones, and I began to resent my parents for not allowing me to have one. Despite my attempts to communicate my feelings to them, nothing changed, and I remained the only one in my group without a phone.
It also came to the point where I would steal money from them so that I could buy toys to show my classmates which I admit was wrong (I never stole from anybody apart from my parents and grandparents).
When I was in my first year of high school, I was given a phone. I was over the moon with excitement - it was my first ever phone and I felt like a grown-up. I loved being able to text my friends and scroll through social media whenever I wanted. Life was good, until my sister got a boyfriend.
Being the older sister, she confided in me about everything. She told me all about her new beau and how much she liked him. I knew our parents wouldn't approve of her having a boyfriend at her age, so I kept her secret safe and promised not to tell a soul. She had someone to rely on and I don’t. And become envious of her.
Then, something totally unexpected happened. The guy I had been crushing on for three whole years messaged me out of the blue. He asked me if I would be his girlfriend and, of course, I said yes! We had both liked each other for so long, it was a dream come true.
But things quickly turned sour. My parents found out about my new boyfriend and they were absolutely livid. They were furious that I had kept such a big secret from them, and they couldn't believe that I had started dating so young. Suddenly, my happy world felt like it was falling apart.
I had aunts, grandparents, and cousins who lived in the same neighborhood as us, so we always had people to turn to. My father had a younger sister who I also called my aunt. She was in her late twenties and hadn't been married yet, but that didn't bother us. What did bother my grandparents was when she got pregnant. They were furious with her because she wasn't married, and they blamed her live-in partner for everything.
As a ten-year-old, I didn't really understand what was going on, but I remember my grandparents being angry and my aunt being very upset. When she finally gave birth, her partner moved in with my grandparents and my other aunt. Since my parents were both working, my sister and I would go to their house after school. Her partner was always there to watch us, and he seemed nice enough at first.
But after a few weeks, he started doing things to me that made me uncomfortable. I didn't know how to tell anyone, and I was scared that my family would get in trouble if I did. So I kept it to myself for a while, but eventually, I couldn't take it anymore. I told my parents everything, and they wanted to sue him for what he did to me.
However, my father didn't want to go through with it because he was worried about what would happen to my aunt and her children if something happened to her partner. I was heartbroken when I found out that my aunt didn't believe me. She had always been my best friend since I was the first granddaughter of my grandparents, and we were very close despite the age gap between us. It was a difficult time for me, but I learned that sometimes, people don't believe you even when you tell the truth
Then online classes started, my parents bought me a computer to use for school. But I quickly found myself spending more time playing games and meeting people online. One person, in particular, caught my attention - an 18-year-old guy who was always there for me. We became close friends, but when my parents found out about him, they were furious. They hit me and told me to focus on my studies and having a boyfriend is only a bad influence. But they didn’t know that he was the one comforting me through hard times and always there to support me.
They always compared me to my cousin on my mother's side, who had high grades and was seen as the ideal child. I tried to explain that my cousin had different parenting, but my parents wouldn't listen. Instead, I became more rebellious, using the money I stole from them to buy cellphones and defy their rules.
My relationship with my father was strained, too. He never showed any affection towards me, and I felt like he favored my sisters. Even when I tried my best to get his attention, he never seemed to notice. When face-to-face classes resumed, I skipped school to be with my boyfriend and ended up getting suspended. (I had a sore throat that day, the school wouldn’t allow anyone with symptoms to attend since there was still COVID)
At school (I was in an all girls school), I found a friend group who would talk behind other people's backs. I felt guilty about it and eventually told one of the people they were talking about. I thought I had made a new friend, but later found out that they were also talking about me. Despite this, we eventually worked things out and became close.
However, my parents found out that I was still using cellphones and became physically abusive. They hit me, kicked me, and even tried to drown me in dirty water. I asked them to send me to a psychiatrist, but they refused and told me that I was just being difficult.
It’s a tough time in my life, but I had my boyfriend to rely on. He was always there for me and helped me through the tough times. Even now, he's still by my side, and I'm grateful for his support. But I still struggle with my relationship with my family and my own sense of self-worth. I didn’t know what to do with my life even now. I really don’t know what to do with this life..

A nice little surprise for you all on a day of less pleasant surprises!
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Daniel sat on his bed as he looked at the neural patch Hannah’rah had given him earlier, wondering if she had used hers yet. He shrugged, stuck the patch to the nape of his neck, and laid down in his bed, staring at the underside of the bunk above him as an overlay appeared in his eyes. He waited a moment until he saw two completely sets of images in his eyes, at which point he then closed them. There was a slight moment of disorientation as he continued to see the new world despite his eyes being closed, and then his brain corrected things based on his former experience, and it no longer felt strange. As he began to move his hands around, he began to feel the slightly strange feeling as the signals were intercepted to prevent his limbs from actually moving while his eyes were closed, and he then took a moment to look at his avatar.
His real body had been recreated with high accuracy, including most of the exterior details of his prosthetic arm. He began to think about the time it must have taken for her to recreate this, and he began to wonder if the reason for her fatigue in the morning wasn’t solely because of her snoring roommate.
He began to look around, taking in the recreation of a small village in the Western part of Angland, filled by Elves. The forest surrounded it, but there were small breaks for the roads and rivers. He’d only been here a couple of times, but-
“Boo!”
Daniel turned around to see Hannah’rah smiling at him, standing in a traditional loose fitting long Elven dress. She had her fiery hair let down, and it and her dress blew in the faint breeze that he could feel simulated on his skin. For a moment, he felt like they were back in Angland, walking through the forest and petting herds of deer while watching Dragons soar above them.
“Have I ever told you that I love you?” he asked, bringing her in for a hug.
“24 times now,” she smiled as she gestured for him to walk. “Anything you want to discuss, or should I start?”
“Go ahead.”
“Do you miss being home?”
“Which home? England, or Angland?”
“Angland.”
“... Yeah, I do. There’s just something about that place that draws me in.”
“Do you want to go back?”
“I mean, kinda, but that’s just homesickness really. I of course want to go back eventually, but we’ve just managed to start seeing the rest of what’s around us. Do you?”
“... I would have liked to do a bit more before we left,” Hannah’rah admitted, sitting down on the edge of a bridge that overlooked a stream.
“Hmm, woulda liked more free time with you in public and whatnot, rather than just as your travelling partner,” he told her, sitting next to her.
“Yeah, but my Dad-”
“Please, let’s not get worked up over him now.”
“Right, sorry. It’s just that It’s going to be difficult to be together….”
“Please don’t ask that question again. Not now.”
“Sorry…. With any luck, he will come to his senses and see things the same way my Mum does, but I’m not holding out on hope right now.”
“'Ain't a lot we can do from here.”
“No, I suppose not,” she sighed.
“As always, I’m here for you.”
“I know, it was just difficult during basic. We couldn't really see each other and talk it through, and now I just feel like I need to dump it all somewhere now that I can.”
“You can if you want to.”
“I don’t. You don’t deserve to be hit with my family issues, and I’m just going to get worked up over my Dad. I brought you here to talk, and here I am dumping my problems on you.”
“It’s fi-”
“It’s not fine,” she cut him off. “Ugh, I wanted to have a moment, and I’m just going to ruin it at this rate.”
.-.-.
"Lieutenant Commander, your request has been completed," Affinity's voice came from outside the simulation.
"Perfect, thank you," Daniel replied, opening his eyes for a moment so his real mouth worked, before closing them again.
.-.-.
"Don't worry about the moment. We sparred earlier to relieve some stress, but we got cut short, so why don't we try something else?" he suggested, opening a menu with his hand and adjusting the settings. "Naval Marine 2150?"
"Won't be the same without everyone else…."
"I know," he smiled, joining a voice chat.
"Wait, what!? Hannah'rah? Daniel? You're online!?" a voice came out of nowhere.
"Hey, Xailin. Hey, everyone. We ain't exactly got a tonne of time, nor can we really do this again later, nor should we be doing this now to be honest, but we've got a Comms Gate to Earth, so we can play tonight!"
"Sweet! We can break our losing streak! Come on in!" Xailin told them, sending them an invite a moment later to join the group of their old university friends.
"But, how did you get that approved?" Hannah'rah asked Daniel, muting them for a moment.
"Affinity worked her magic. The comms gate was just sitting there on the station, active and underutilised, so I managed to push a request through for therapy?"
"Therapy?"
"What? Wiping the enemy team is therapeutic, isn't it?" he asked, getting to his feet and offering her his hand. “Level 5 and above VIs have a therapist mode, and they can pull a few strings if they conclude it’s necessary.”
“There’s the Techboy I know,” she smiled as she accepted his hand, unmuting them and hitting join.
-----------------------------
Daniel dove for cover as his shield hit zero, managing to get behind a pillar before he took another hit from the pulse repeater the drone nearby was unloading on him. He plucked a magnetic grenade from his belt, armed it, and blindly tossed it roughly where the shots were coming from. He heated an explosion, followed by a second one when the drone impacted the ground. He then looked out of cover, confirming the drone's destruction, and then checked to see how the golden Dragon was getting on with the tank, realising that the torn up turret was already halfway down the street, and Xailin was just tearing it into chunks to, which quickly become cover destroying projectiles.
He looked up to see the enemy team's silver Dragon diving down on him, only for a missile to silently launch from the building Hannah'rah had gone into moments before. The missile impacted the enemy Dragon, and they were taken out of the fight, their body despawning before it hit the ground. Daniel used the momentary distraction to break from cover and cross the street, making it almost all the way before a machine gun lit him up, cracking his barely restored shield and bouncing a couple of rounds off of his armour before he reached his next piece of cover. There was a loud crack as Mark’rah took out the machine gunner with his 50mm rifle, and Daniel managed to push his momentary clearing to dive into the target building.
As he began to run up the stairs, he managed to make out a frantic scrabbling as his target prepared to run, which only confirmed which floor his target was on. He stopped and turned, facing directly towards the source of the noise, and began to charge, relying on his power armour to demolish the walls as he ran. He heard someone let out a small scream as he reached his destination, and brought his armoured fist down on his target, crushing the skull of the Dwarf and quickly forcing their body to despawn. He then quickly dropped down on one knee and picked up their uplink, inserting a datajack into the port. A few moments later, the holo display returned ‘Access Granted’, and he linked the enemy’s drones to his link, assuming full control over them. Most of the enemy team began to fall back and destroy their drones once they realised what had happened, knocking out around a quarter, but it wasn’t enough, and Daniel managed to wipe out almost all of the enemy team in seconds.
Daniel heard a noise nearby, and he quickly readied his SMG, only to see another power armour user running towards him through the hole he made. He raised his weapon and dumped the mag into them, breaking their shield but not penetrating their armour. He dropped his weapon and readied a grenade, but he was knocked to the ground before he could make use of it. The two of them began to roll around, fighting to lock the other down, but he was dismayed to find that his opponent was using premium power armour, and was therefore stronger and harder to shake off.
Cursing the poor game design, he decided to take the easy victory for his team, and primed one of the grenades still in his pouch. His opponent realised what was happening, and quickly pinned his arms down, allowing Daniel to headbutt him instead, but there was little effect on either of them. He then wove a leg between the enemies, and managed to make their footing slip when he straightened it. Pushing his advantage, he rolled them over and managed to get one hand free. He finished arming his last grenade, but his opponent managed to knock it from his hand before it went off.
Out of ideas, Daniel prepared to break away and head for a window where a drone could help, but before he could, an armoured fist slipped down past his head, and the tip of the large spike fixed to the attached arm touched the helmet of his opponent, causing it to deploy a sharp metal spear that pierced clean through their armour and skull. He looked up at the owner to see Hannah’rah, happy, but also slightly displeased.
“Yeah, I should have called for help,” he told her, knowing exactly what was coming.
“Knowing and doing are two different things. You do that on the job, and you won’t be able to know that you should have afterwards.”
“Thanks for the assist, though.”“You’re welcome, just please don’t try that grenade stunt IRL,” she pleaded.
“Don’t worry, I’m not planning on it,” he assured her as she helped him to his feet.
“Well, that’s the game,” she told him, looking at the victory screen in front of her.
“Back to the lobby we go,” he replied.
The area around them quickly faded and brought them into an armoury with Xailin and Mark’rah, and the avatars of Casillia, Kilakthen, Stalika, and Ttragtum respawned.
“That was amazing!” Kilakthen exclaimed. “Hannah’rah, that Dragon kill! And Daniel, actually holding out against that BS OP power armour! How did you manage that?”
“The skill supplement system doesn’t have shit on real experience. It’s not flexible enough to deal with someone fighting competently without the system. Throw an atypical move at them, and it doesn’t know what to do,” Daniel explained.
“And since when was the Silent Striker so effective, Hannah’rah?”
“When I was trained to actually use it, or the real weapon it’s based on anyway,” she replied.
“I suppose you’ve both had your hands on the real stuff, haven’t you? You both know how to use everything effectively,” Xailin commented.
“Not so much me. I mean, I’ve had CQC training, but not heavy weapons,” Daniel replied, bringing in Hannah’rah for a hug. “My little arm breaker here on the other hand….”
“Arm breaker?” Casillia asked. “Hannah’rah, did you break his arm while sparring or something?”
“Not his, and I didn’t break any arms, just dislocated the shoulders of a few people who really didn't know when to stop,” she told her.
“Hannah’rah…” Casillia trailed off.
“What? Don’t tell me there’s never been a situation when you just want to punch an asshole in the face to make them go away.”
“Well, of course, but-”
“Well, I was ordered to fight them, so I did, and they didn’t tap out in time,” Hannah’rah shrugged.
“Anyway,” Xailin began, shaking his head. “Are you both up for another round?”
“Love to, but it’s getting late, and we’ve both got a busy day tomorrow,” Daniel apologised. “This will probably be the last time we see each other for a fair while.”
“How long?” Xailin asked.
“Sorry, we can’t disclose details of our mission,” Hannah’rah apologised.
“Ah, damn. Well, bring us all something cool back from another planet, would ya?”
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What? I already posted one extra episode.
You weren’t really expecting two, were you? You’ll get it tomorrow, as per the normal schedule.

Hello burbank! We are the Burbank Library and we post weekly round-ups of upcoming events and services for children, teens, and adults at our three locations.
As always, programs marked with an asterisk (*) are unique programs that are not offered regularly (typically weekly, biweekly, or monthly) -- in other words, attend them while you can!
Please feel free to ask questions here and to let us know what other kinds of content you'd like us to post on Reddit.
Tuesday, April 4

• *Spring into Love Film Series: Mrs. Harris Goes to Paris Adults
• Verdugo Jobs Center Job Help Adults

Wednesday, April 5

• Job Connect: First Impressions Adults
• (Online & In-Person) English Naturally Adults
• One-on-One Technology Help Adults
• Family Story Time Families

Thursday, April 6

• Job & Career Development Help Adults
• (Online & In-Person) English Naturally Adults
• Creative Kids Kids

Friday, April 7

• (Online) Job & Career Development Help Adults
• Family Story Time Families

Saturday, April 8

• English Naturally Adults
• Dungeons and Dragons Teens
• Family Story Time Families

See all April events Search our catalog Get immediate access to Library eBooks and online resources with an eCard Use online databases and resources Research local history

So about a few months ago when the college semester began I was pretty confident in myself and I asked a few girls out. I got rejected by all of them because they were taken. I was bummed a bit but eventually found a girl I thought things were going well with but after some time I got the feeling she was avoiding me. It made me overthink a lot wondering what I did wrong. I wasted so much time on her.
Around that time my schoolwork stress started picking up and I got some exam results back which despite me studying so fucking hard I didn’t do well. It was a massive blow to my confidence.
It doesn’t help at the same time while I was pursuing her another girl was showing interest in me but I just didn’t see it. I still feel like a complete idiot for it and I lost contact with her cuz she stopped showing up where I usually saw her. The couple of times I could’ve lit a spark with her I just fumbled and didn’t do anything.
So yeah I hate the fact I have been making like no progress for the past month or so. I don’t really have many people I can go to in my life for dating advice but I found this one guy online who seemed reasonable and he didn’t seem like a snake oil salesman as he had concrete proof that he was actually successful with girls.
He said the red pill shit is garbage and the way to get dates or sex is to just ask a lot of girls out as well as improve your appearance. I’ve done the appearance part but asking girls out feels like such a mentally hard task now. I can talk to girls just fine and have been recently but actually asking for their number I just can’t bring myself to do. I’m so afraid of looking creepy or weird, maybe it’s because I just want something casual? Maybe it could be cuz my sex drive is through the roof these days since I have been in recovery for porn addiction? I have no idea.
It’s like these days despite this claim having no basis in reality I am repulsive to women.
How do I get my confidence back? At some point I think maybe I don’t even need confidence I’ll just be like “meh it is what it is” and do it. I don’t mind being rejected I just want to feel like I’m making progress again.

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Hey guys I'm back making draft classes. I am very disappointed in the quality of draft classes on madden share. I can never find one with correct players, some are close. But biggest peave is I haven't seen one with correct equipment. Some are close but seem very un-polished forsure.
I'm currently doing a full draft in high detail, combine numbers etc. All equipment correct(atleast close)for players correct. I'm currently working on one and 1 week in, I only have qbs/rbs/wrs complete. So not doing every player as that's too much for myself. As each player is roughly taking 15 mins a piece including research. So once I get into the undrafted players I move on to the next position. Getting my numbers from nfl.com combine results, and some game film, equipment from Google images.
I am wondering if there are any draft nerds, perfectionists like me that want to tag team the best draft class available. There's something about drafting a highly accurate class, when the equipment/ players height/weight is correct it makes the experience more immersive .Doing this myself is going to take a few weeks forsure with the limited time I have.
I can post my class on madden share, you can download and help me getting this draft class out there! It's alot of work. We can all take credit. Actually I could care less about credit, I just want a highly accurate draft class! I downloaded about 10 of them to check and none of them were really close to being accurate, especially depth wise.
Feel free to reply or PM me if interested.
Meanwhile I'll post the class.
It will be named
NAVEX_NFL2023 DRAFT CLASS VERSION 1-IN PROGRESS
If you do some work you can repost it with version 2...version 3 and so on until we are finished.
Cheers!

Interestingly, the Bible clearly says God’s New Earth (Jerusalem) will be ruled by children. Greta Thunberg represents this new generation, striving to promote and sustain life on our planet. Here, I share my notes on her most recent (February 2023) work The Climate Book, with the hope in my heart that her voice will be carried far. *[My own Christian perspective is weaved into her scientific outlook.]
To begin, Carbon Dioxide (C02) is a basic building block of life, some of which has been stored underground from plants from long ago. Over 2 million years ago, too much C02 caused a mass extinction. Afterwards, trees were virtually gone. It took millions of years for Earth's biosphere and life to recover.
People have been farming for over 10,000 years, depleting the nutrients of the land. Between 1945 and 2000, the number of people tripled. Since the 1990s, we have dumped more climate changing toxins into our environment than throughout all of human history. We consume more, due to this “great acceleration.” In the 20th century, people accelerated their use of fossils fuels.
The science is solid. The great acceleration occurred with the industrial revolution. We have filled our oceans with plastics, and are destabilizing our own ecosystem. This is like sawing off the branch we are sitting on!
Nature cycles carbon, but global warming can be exacerbated by the release of carbon from the soil due to warming. We have knocked the natural balance off, due to our use of stored fuels and our own carbon emissions. Since the industrial revolution, our economy is reliant upon fossil fuels and non-sustainable practices.
We must rebalance our planet by controlling our own behaviors and emissions. If we continue with current practices, we will warm our planet by 4 degrees by the end of this century.
What will this be like? Extreme heat waves will occur yearly, along with drought and famine. Sea ice will disappear, revealing more of the ocean.
Climate change directly causes the death of coral reefs, and if they collapse they will also take with them millions of ocean species. We may be causing the 6th extinction. Coral reefs become bleached due to warmer waters as their colorful algae is expelled, threatening over 30% of ocean species. Right now, three billion people rely upon our oceans for food. We need to farm our oceans sustainably (such as for seaweed). Fishermen are currently exploiting 90% of available fisheries. One billion people depend on fish for omega-3 fatty acids and more.
Why don’t more people care? Many do not perceive a threat because it is slow and complicated. We have exploited and distanced ourselves from Nature. Even our religions have promoted the false notion that this world is to be devalued, and we are separated from our Creator. Many feel a void, with no God within. Many try to fill this emptiness with ceaseless products. Our entire worldview and our daily habits must change.
Today 20% of California’s power use goes toward providing water. We can take better measures, like drawing from ocean water.
Factory and human waste is polluting our waters. Riots have broken out, such as in India, over access to water. Who is taking this seriously? The public? The government? It seems almost no one.
Our government could pass new laws, but they do not. People are also self-interested, and rarely act for the social good if it takes from them in any way. This age is characterized by selfishness and greed, as even the Bible warns in Revelation. Tragically and shockingly, the fossil fuel industry is receiving 11 million in subsidies each minute.
The Industrial revolution, rise of science and decrease in religious morality have all compelled these trends forward. We need a new ethic prioritizing life. Religious leaders must support life, not the Death Culture which exalts the self (no matter the consequences).
We are literally obsessed with culture wars that distract us from our common interests in protecting our planet and making future generations possible.
What stands in the way of a sustainable future for human life? Should consumers even have a choice to purchase destructive products, like plastic containers for single-uses? Should meat even be available? If we really took this seriously, what measures would we take, and what laws would our government pass?
One problem is how some lives are valued more than others, and a select few are exploiting and making life impossible for many. Those in power do not tend to question their privilege!
GLORIFICATION OF THE SELF We have convinced ourselves that we deserve our carbon-rich lifestyles. If we remain hedonistic and not prudent, the poorest and most vulnerable to climate change will suffer the most.
And, Christ will judge us based on how the least among us is treated. Do we contemplate this with each plastic bottle we toss out, or plane trip we take? Isn’t living sustainably Christian behavior, reflecting the wisdom of the Holy Spirit and our living God?
Our future grandchildren will pay and suffer for our convenience now. But, we glorify the self. We glorify the pleasure of the individual and freedom to drive our species over a cliff. Many arguments from the ‘other side’ boil down to a call for the freedom to die.
CORRUPT LEADERSHIP Our leaders are taking us over a cliff. George W. Bush pulled out of the Kyoto protocol, given it was not ratified prior to his taking power. He chose to serve corporate interests (even over human life). Bush declared that the American way of life is not negotiable (1992). Since he spoke these words over 30 years ago, our emissions have increased by 60%, creating an existential crisis.
Given such attitudes and priorities, we have a limited carbon budget to spend in the next few years if we wish to avoid the most dire consequences of global warming. We need to raise the cost of carbon, forcing consumers to pay more for products that are heavy in carbon pollution. We also need to change our diets. We must get our priorities straight.
In 2009, corrupt lobbying destroyed an act that would have helped. But the fossil fuel industry, driven by greed, spends billions on disinformation and distraction. They poison public debate with dirty money. Leaders set non-binding targets, then fail to reach the goals. Their true priorities are economic growth and profit. It seems to the public that actions are being taken, but they are not taking serious measures at all.
The richest ten percent contribute 50% of our total C02 emissions. We need to restructure our economy to be sustainable. The idea of infinite growth is not possible on our finite planet.
We are all in the same crisis, but not the same boat. The only hope is in speaking truth to power and adjusting our behaviors accordingly.
CURRENT SITUATION There is about 1 carbon molecule for every 2,000 other molecules in our atmosphere, so carbon is difficult to locate for removal. To stop putting carbon into our air is much cheaper and better than paying for carbon removal later, which would cost trillions upon trillions. Why should we allow companies to continue business as usual, passing cost and problems to future generations?
Climate change is responsible for over 2 trillion in economic costs. Economic damage from climate change will cost over 3x the amount the pandemic cost. For example, insurance rates will rise and the real estate market will suffer due to not being able to sell in coastal and impacted areas.
Worldwide, waste is increasing at an alarming rate and 20% of methane emissions are due to our waste. We need to engage in more intelligent practices. For example, we can compost (which reduces waste in landfills that leads to methane emissions). Composting will also nourish our gardens.
Methane removal, through oxidation, is needed. Half of our methane is produced from human behaviors like cattle agriculture.
C02 is forever, while methane is temporary. Methane is 20-30x more potent in warming our atmosphere than C02, but it dissipates over 40 years while C02 will remain thousands upon thousands of years. C02 is also cumulative.
Given this, we must stop our emissions of greenhouse gases immediately. If we reach zero emissions, it will drastically reduce global warming. Carbon dioxide is at its highest in 2 billion years, due to our behaviors. We are experimenting with our own lives and planet!
Toxins accumulate in sea creatures, damaging the whole ecosystem. C02 enters the blood of fish, affecting acidification. Acidity has already risen 30%, producing hazards for marine life, like for coral reefs and in decreasing calcification in the shells of sea life. Shopping bags can strangle sea animals and their stomachs are found full of microplastics.
The Amazon forest works as a giant air conditioner, cooling our planet. It absorbs C02. But temperatures in the Amazon are increasing and it is getting more dry due to the expansion of farming and deforestation.
Aerosols like smoke and other tiny particles in our air affect our global temperature. Some cool our atmosphere by reflecting the sun, even dropping temperatures by 0.5 percent. Without aerosols, our atmosphere would be hotter. But air pollution is also hazardous, coming from our cars and factories, for example.
Clouds reflect sunlight back into space, but can also insulate heat like a blanket. Reduced clouds over our oceans force the ocean to absorb the sunlight, thus contributing to global warming.
Melting ice caps no longer reflect the sun, leading even to more warming. Our glaciers are melting. The Himalayas provide drinking water to billions, yet will melt by 1/3. We have enough ice to raise our ocean levels the equivalent of a 20 story building. We have already lost the equivalent of Mt. Everest in ice sheets. This melting will lead to coastal devastation for those living near our oceans. Our oceans will rise by a meter by 2100.
Oceans absorb about 90% of the excess heat produced by global warming. While oceans absorb about ¼ of C02, warming produces less absorption. We must enhance our oceans ability to absorb C02. Even a 1.5 degree increase in temperature is a great risk to our future survival. Our weather has extremes, like the freezing waters and the heatwave that killed many in 2021.
Human made climate change has devastating consequences. For example, Hurricane Harvey cost billions and the severity was 15% greater due to human made climate change. Sadly, 20 million people were displaced by flooding in 2020.
Distressingly, we have all witnessed that even minor disruptions in our supply chain are devastating. Thus, climate change must be averted at all costs.
Our temperature has already warmed by 1%, which all reputable science agrees upon. This is already causing damage right now. Heat waves and air pollution lead to heart related and respiratory deaths, not just heat strokes. Millions die per year due to air pollution. The warming climate also triggers diseases like Maleria and will kill millions. These diseases are being seen in areas not seen before.
The increase of C02 in our atmosphere is even making our crops less nutritious. Specifically, soils lack zinc and protein. Zinc deficiency then leads to a reduced immune system. Millions more will have an iron and folate deficiency due to current C02 levels. Iron deficiency leads to premature births.
GOING FORWARD So then, what is our best path forward for survival? We have to stick to a carbon budget per year to reach our goal of only increasing the temperature by 1.5 degrees Celsius. The carbon budget, to stay within the agreements of the Paris accord, will be used up in a few years. But noone seems to be sounding any alarms. Is this because our media is controlled by the elite?
Politicians still respond to mammon ($) with no concern, really, for life. Congressman Manchin singlehandedly rewrote climate legislation in 2021, even with all aware that he has millions invested in fossil fuels, like the influential Koch brothers.
Exxon Mobil has been well aware of the consequences of their actions for decades, yet put forth false discussions into the public sphere. They purposefully stalled for time, which we do not have.
The King of Saudi Arabia has unbelievable wealth and power, but when we move to solar and wind energy power will not be so concentrated. This may lead to a more hopeful and democratic future that serves the actual interests of the people. We need to turn to our Sun. We need to now rely upon energy from heaven, not from hell. It is not that we do not have the money to change. It is that those benefiting from our current Death Economy do not have the will to change.
Many will promote carbon capture technologies, but the reality is hidden. There are only about 20 carbon capture facilities operating right now, some shown to produce more carbon than they capture. We can use fossil fuels only until around 2050, unless technology like carbon capture is seriously invested in (and not just used as a talking point). Many CEOs deflect attention from change right now, promising (like snake oil salesmen) to develop sustainable technology in the future. (Interestingly, blue hydrogen can be made from carbon capture.)
Solving our crisis calls for us putting less demand upon our energy system, such as in consuming less. We need to return to more of a natural, Earth based way of life. Do we all really need to extend our days, with artificial light, past the natural hours of sunlight? Must we eat meat? Wherever there is a roof, there is a potential for a solar panel. Wind parks can also be built in offshore locations, where they are less disruptive.
Green hydrogen is a fuel that leaves only water behind and is usually produced by methane. But it costs more to produce than it makes. Thus, green hydrogen requires an abundance of cheap energy.
Hydropower facilities use water flow to produce energy, while nuclear power splits elements for energy, and produces around 10% of the world’s energy. But, a nuclear power factory that just opened in 2022 took 16 years to open. And, nuclear power can have disastrous consequences and can be the target of terrorism.
Biomass energy creates energy by burning wood or other biological matter. But, it can take hundreds of years for forests to regrow. Thus, we need to slow down this process and aim to stop burning things on Earth for energy.
Geothermal heat takes energy from the Earth's heat, producing around 17% of greenhouse gases. But it is limited in that there are limited planetary hot spots. In air capture measures, carbon is pumped underground, like in BECS. BECS pumps carbon underground and provides electricity from the burning of plant matter, which is cost effective compared to other measures. Enhanced weathering is also a promising technique, such as exposing crushed rocks and minerals to the carbon in the air to facilitate natural processes.
Finally, some promote geoengineering, which is the manipulation of our atmosphere, such as reducing the warming effects of our sun. Some support spraying sun-blocking aerosols or coating ice to protect it. This is actually risky to our ecosystems. Solar engineering is too dangerous, given once the process is started it must continue indefinitely (and political regimes can change). If suddenly stopped, warming will occur to an even greater degree than if no measures were ever taken.
REAL SOLUTIONS Elites consume and produce more than most. Our problems are that of inequality as much as pollution. If the top 10% (financially) only produced the carbon footprint of the bottom 90% of global emitters, 1/3 of carbon would be reduced. Thus, carbon budgets will affect the filthy rich the most. The most wealthy are contributing a shockingly disproportionate amount of pollution. The average person produces 6.5 tons of emissions per year, with the wealthy producing 75 tons.
Rich countries know they are liable for their pollution. They, of course, do not want to focus discussions on responsibility. The global economy could shrink by 18% due to the climate crisis.
We need to reduce emissions, restoring soils and forests. We need to protect our soil from tilling, pesticides and depleted nutrients. We have found that enriching soil with nitrogen has polluted our water. We need new practices. How can we sustainably grow food? How can we facilitate new ideas?
PLANT-BASED DIET We know that as affluence increases, so does meat consumption. But more efficient use of water and land, such as in transitioning to plant-based diets and farms, is our only viable path forward. This would support health of our land, souls and bodies!
Plant-based foods have the lowest impact, while meats can impact our environment over 20x more. Every 50 calories that go into meat (feed) produces 1 calorie as human food. 4x the size of Brazil in land is used for grazing cattle, the greatest use of land (even above forests). And, 20% of gas emissions are due to how we use land, mainly for agriculture. Our current food production also causes 30% of greenhouse gases. We need to shift to a plant-based diet. We can feed our communities using 76% less land. One burger, which gives 10 grams of protein, uses resources like land and water that would provide many more nutritious calories if the same land was instead devoted to vegetable and fruit gardens.
Turning away from meat would not only help us feed more people, it would also help reduce diseases in our bodies and help reduce carbon pollution. Specifically, 350 million tons per year in emissions would be reduced if we shunned meat. Becoming vegetarian is the single most impactful action you can take to help.
We are eating more calories, when we need to consume less. Specifically, we need to reduce pork and beef calories by 80% in wealthy countries. Currently, 1/3 of all food produced is not consumed. We must make smarter use of our land and reduce our food consumption and waste. Humans have directly reduced biodiversity in shaping the land for our purposes, such as in agricultural practices. We farm around 30% of land now. It would take far less land to farm if we stopped using land for food for cows and other “products” for the meat industry.
Given all of this, how can it be that $500 billion in government subsidies go into agriculture that is not sustainable? We need a political and spiritual revolution. We need significant behavioral and technological changes immediately. For example, if we lowered the speed limit, we would save over 5 tons of carbon emissions annually (just in Germany). We also need cities that are efficiently constructed, and need to reduce unnecessary travel. We can use online meetings rather than physically traveling to meetings.
We can also encourage college students to prepare solutions for our problems, instead of preparing for the job market! This kind of free thought would be supported by a Universal Basic Income.
Even in 2021, 95% of transport relies upon oil (including cars, planes and ships). We need to curb the sale of SUVs, which produce great emissions. Why are they so popular? We need to encourage lighter vehicles, banning SUV advertising. We need to wake up!
Renewable energy is now the cheapest form of energy. Renewable energy makes more sense, yet those who have vested interests in fossil fuels do not want change and actively work against change. Still today, 1.446 billion vehicles run on petrol. EVs are a good step, but we really need electric public transit.
We need to outlaw all petrol engine vehicles starting 2025, and more. By 2035, there will be 2 billion private vehicles. We need free public transportation, like trains, trams, busses and ferries.
We also really need to buy less. We can reuse and repair our items and vehicles, rather than buying new things. Americans spend $5,400 per year on impulse purchases, and studies show that more ‘stuff’ does not equate with greater levels of happiness. We can share and borrow items, as a true community. This is also Christian behavior.
We can wear second-hand clothing. The clothing industry fills landfills! Electric bikes are also good alternatives to our current ways. We can buy only energy efficient appliances and can avoid over packaged foods, meat and dairy.
We need to transform our food system and plant green gardens everywhere possible. We need home garden and trees and biodiversity in cemeteries, parks and public areas as well as home backyards.
Biodiversity protects us by removing C02 from the air and purifying our waters. It helps mitigate disease and even protects our health. We need to support biodiverse land because it absorbs more C02. This is a real action we can take.
We also need to let forests grow and stop cutting young trees for wood. Before the Industrial revolution, people burned mostly wood for energy. Industrialization did relieve the deforestation occurring at the beginning of the 19th century by turning to fossil fuel energy instead of wood burning. After the development of coal burning machines, pollution killed more people than we realize. We do have to stop burning fossil fuel.
Today the ability of a forest to store carbon depends on many factors. First, we need to replace trees at the rate carbon would have been captured if wood was not harvested. If a tree is not cut, how much carbon would it capture over its lifetime?
We need to reduce wood harvesting. Specifically, we can harvest from constructed tree farms, but also allow other trees to grow old, to support biodiversity. We need no till farming, a plant based diet, biodiverse forests and more. We need drastic carbon emission cuts now.
We have already reduced the populations of birds, reptiles and insects by 2/3 since the 1970s. Sadly, 60% of all songbirds have disappeared in the last decades.
We are killing our ecosystem. Pollinators (like bees) are dying, thus leading to our deaths due to not being able to eat vegetables (which increases heart disease due to poor diet and high meat consumption).
But, are people even able to respond to new information? Are we able to act on new data? We will see.
Buying less means we do not have to earn as much. Our world will be better and we will feel better. We need to take the status away from consuming products. There are websites devoted to revealing the true carbon footprint of popular products, like: www.ethicalconsumer.com
Profits motivate corporations to distract the public from the truth. We are not told how unhealthy certain common things are, even in the long term. It is not in their interest (they mistakenly think) to be honest and change to a more sustainable economy. Of course, God sees all.
Politicians are short sighted and are not addressing the crisis at all. We need “honesty, integrity and courage” (Greta Thunberg). But, many are still driven by mammon (money) to the point of our death. Many politicians are corrupt, with our blood on their hands. They have the blood of all future children who will never breathe in God's air of life, given lobbying, on their hands. How is lobbying legal? Our government does not work for the people, but for power and mammon. The rich are served and our Death Culture continues, while we continue to consume dead flesh.
Our politicians must lead us in a new direction, no matter if it is aligned with popular public opinion. Politicians need to communicate our true situation and our media needs to direct us to a more healthy future.
“The time for little steps in the right direction is over. We are in a crisis” – Greta.
Promises to become climate neutral by 2050 puts everyone back to sleep. If they really cared, drastic changes would be made right now instead of distracting our focus, according to Greta Thunberg.
“It matters what we say, but it matters even more what we do” - Greta.
We cannot act only nationally, given we are on one planet and are all affected. For example, the pandemic could not be kept to one nation. We must address our crisis as a world, not as isolated nations.
Geopolitical tensions stand in the way of true international negotiations. Nations are driven by a will to power. We need a new base ethic of valuing life and caring about each other (across nations and groups).
We need to work together to address the planetary crisis. Instead, each nation is actually preparing for conflict, based on the finances devoted to building military forces. Our money shows our true priorities.
Greta Thunberg says we need to just simply “tell it like it is.” We need to stand on our moral ground and be open to innovative ideas and solutions. She suggests many ideas for change.
First, we must start treating this climate crisis like a crisis. We must get our priorities straight. We must also admit our economic systems have failed. We need to face reality to be able to create a better world.
The best way to absorb more carbon is to leave forests alone. “A living tree must be valued more than a dead one,” explains Greta Thunberg. Scientists recommend we protect at least 30% of nature. Currently, only 3% of the Earth’s surface is unharmed.
We must spread the facts; 5.9 trillion dollars are spent annually in subsidies for fossil fuels, which is insanity. Do not fly; avoid air travel. The tourist economy is responsible for 8% of our yearly emissions. Instead of subsidies for air travel, we need to pay subsidies to encourage train travel. We can invest in wind and solar power, and scientific advances like farm-free food grown in a laboratory.
Science can shed light on how to nourish our soil and stop depleting it. Thus, we can go forward with science and morality as our guiding forces. The ‘is’ and the ‘ought’ will be complementary.
We need to educate ourselves and become climate activists. We can institute justice through protests and civil disobedience. We need to fight for democracy in non-violent ways. We need new laws to protect us.
Be disruptive. Look for common ground, using love and not hate to shed light into the darkness. Avoid culture wars that only distract us from survival with endless debates. Very simply, we must also buy less and use less. We can also stop purchasing single-use plastics, like bottles for water.
Plastics that are disposable have been available for 20 years, and thus have accumulated in our oceans. Companies that used to offer glass bottles and also clean them have now moved to disposable products and thus have passed on costs to us.
Coca-cola actively acts against legislation that would have them offer reusable bottles again, as they did before single-use plastics. Companies blame consumers for bad habits yet shoot down laws against single-use plastics. The UK is the second highest trash producer, after the US. Most plastic is counted as recycled but is not. It litters deserts and waters, affecting our climate. Transit companies disguise the true origin of waste as it is relentlessly burned in the cover of darkness.
Countries like the UK, US, Japan and Germany export waste to places like Southeast Asia, where it is often burned at night. People now suffer respiratory illness due to these common practices. Plastic produces greenhouse gases, as it is derived from oil.
And, even today, we do not have accurate data on carbon emissions. The Washington Post found that our current path to climate solutions is not even credible nor viable, given the reported numbers are so distorted. Countries report only a fraction of their true emissions, like Sweden, who reported 50 million tons of greenhouse gases when in fact they emit closer to 150 million tons per year. So, even now, only 1/3 of emissions were even included in reports in Sweden. This is seen internationally as well. We need a proper road map, based on data and our moral ground, that we actually follow!
But “Who do you vote for when the politics needed are nowhere to be found?” poignantly asks Greta Thunberg. Even in progressive countries like Sweden, only 10% of ‘recycled’ products are actually recycled. Much is burned, causing further pollution.
So, recycling is a huge greenwashed myth. Most plastic will never be recycled. It is all made so cheaply that it is made to be disposed of. So, plastic litters landfills and our waters, especially in poorer areas. Micro plastics are now everywhere, even inside us. 8 million tons per year of plastic waste is dumped into our oceans.
We can reduce packaging, to start. We need a major system change. Greenpeace is calling for a 50% reduction in plastics in coming years, given our situation.
Specifically, we already also have 40 years of carbon built up in our atmosphere and our C02 emissions are on track to rise 16% in the coming years.
We are set to increase our global temperature, yet the media is not covering this crisis. We cannot negotiate, for we value life itself while those in power prioritize profit; “They speak to flowers in the language of US dollars” says Greta Thunberg.
We need regular press briefings on our climate crisis and many discussions on how to solve our problems. For example, we can institute a #UBI as part of the transition in our economy and as jobs related to fossil fuels diminish.
Communist China is using over 70% of our carbon budget, and still will in 2030. This, while developing countries are affected the greatest by climate issues. How can developing countries move forward in a sustainable way? Capitalism also contributes to our crisis by encouraging increasing GDPs, despite the true costs to our planet. This economic system demands growth. Yet, high income nations do not need more growth. We need a new economic system based on our ecosystem. No current systems lead to life.
We need to educate ourselves. We need both individual and systemic, market change immediately. We must restructure our economy around renewable energy, less meat consumption and less SUVs, for example, to ensure our future. In fact, 80% of energy used in 2019 was still derived from fossil fuels.
Frequent flying and eating meat are some of the most destructive activities an individual can do in terms of the climate crisis. Some have made an oath to never fly and to become vegetarian, given our situation.
We need to phase out private jets, mega yachts and other egregious displays of wealth and status. We can make these displays shameful and not glorify them. We can take public transport and move away from fossil fuel based engines. For example, in Vienna, 60% of people live in community housing.
Should we shame those who live an unsustainable lifestyle? Should we offer softer signals that change is needed, like having our family over for a vegetarian dinner?
We can encourage others to live with less of an environmental impact. As one neighbor gets solar panels, so do others. We can share plant-based recipes. We can participate in social actions and protests.
Government also (on the macro level beyond the individual) needs to lead and set examples for a new way of living, following through with laws. We need to meet the basic survival needs of all humans on our planet with current resources.
The richest 20% need to reduce their consumption to 1/10th of 2015 levels, making room for others basic needs. Christ stood up for the needy and the powerless. But are we too unloving and selfish to survive as a species? What will happen to our souls, as we turn our backs to the most vulnerable?
Psychology has been used to advertise toward people’s deepest desires to inspire their purchases. Ads create (or play upon) a deep need, promising to fill the inner void. Products promise to make us feel better and to lead to our acceptance by our social groups. But, without God, people remain empty inside while landfills overflow.
For example, 73% of textiles (clothing) produced ends up in landfills. Can we start identifying with God, and not by our outer appearance and the latest fashion?
We need to phase out excess for a few, while expanding access to basic resources to all, like healthcare and housing. This is in line with instituting a Universal Basic Income (#UBI) for all, to help people of all identities survive the upcoming transitions on earth.
Our excesses are a clue into inner poverty. Many do not have solid community ties, even if they have material wealth. We are actually happier when we are connected to others, giving and sharing. Our efforts to help others and transition from our selfish society will lead to deep joy, not poverty. We will be blessed as we use our voices and hands to carry forth God’s will.
As a start, we can choose (given our morals) to buy only 3 new pieces of clothing per year, take less trips, rid ourselves of personal vehicles and eat a plant-based diet. What else can we do?
We need the Holy Spirit to guide our souls and hands as we create a new day! We can change if we hold hope, as the eloquent theologian Jurgen Moltmann has shared. We can shift from unhealthy social norms, and these healthy changes will allow all of us to thrive.
We need relationships based on love and reciprocity instead of greed and a will to power. We need less selfishness and more sacrifice for others whom we share with because we actually care. We need to restructure our world based on love, as Christ taught.
When we take action for a sustainable society, we will find new meaning in our daily actions. Our community bonds can grow stronger as we change. And, as sociologist Emile Durkheim found, strong community bonds lead to less suicides. We have the opportunity to promote life and even joy in coming together to change our world for the better!
We do not wish to conserve the world, but create a new one. We need more community control over resources and a guaranteed income for all, regardless of group affiliation. We need energy efficient public housing and to restructure the economy to a more just system. We need to align our economy with our ecosystem as well as our morality. As the brilliant Martin Buber wrote, we need to develop I-thou relationships, based on a recognition of others and not an exploitation of them. Equity and sustainably go hand in hand; there can be no sustainably without equity. Instead of asking who owns land, we need to ask who is responsible for the land. We need a politics of love.
CONCLUSIONS: CARETAKING IS A GREEN JOB! We need to transition to a care-taking society, where all are cared for and treated with love. We need to dismantle the call to endless growth and greed.
“We need to redefine hope and progress, so that these words do not translate to destruction” – Greta.
We need to prioritize people over profits. Green jobs, like caretaking, can be recognized as we turn away from jobs based on over-consumption of unneeded products. Carework is climate work! We need to not only repair our relationship with our planet, but also with each other. We can become a global family.
Solutions involve community actions in helping each other, just as Christ called for. Also, our youth must be a global force of change. We must learn from our mistakes and challenge the status quo and those with interests in the current Death Culture.
Truth, justice and morality are on the side of creating a sustainable future, explains Greta Thunberg. In our Postmodern age, where some claim all views are valid, what is Truth? Both sides of an issue are not equally valid. Survival is not a story with two sides.
We need to end our Death Culture by following the path of love (set by Christ) and carrying out God’s will, for God is Truth. When we recognize this, we will move from the Postmodern Era to the Pre-Utopian Era, as we prepare the ground for God’s New Earth.
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