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Saw this post and decided it would be a good idea to ask for similar advice, but with the race order reversed!
I'm training for my first 70.3 this year. Since I decided that I like to punish myself, I also signed up for a marathon about 1.5 months later. I'm 11 weeks into a 24-week 70.3 plan (so 13 weeks until 70.3, 19 weeks until 26.2) and, while it's been tough, I've been able to handle the training load.
The 70.3 is my "A" race. I've done sprint tri's (and plan to do an Olympic a month ahead of the 70.3), but never a 70.3. I've also never run a marathon, but have done several halfs. My longest run ever has been about 15.5 miles and I definitely plan to ramp that up a bit more as my training progresses (I'm running around 8-10 miles for my long runs currently).
Goals for both are just to finish and be healthy. I'll probably try for a good time on the 70.3 but plan to mainly Z2 the marathon. My rationale for picking u the 26.2 was that I would already be in pretty good shape for the 70.3, so I figured I would just tack on a few more miles to my runs as my training progressed. After the 70.3 is complete, then spend 3 more weeks by adding a couple more runs without significantly increasing training load/injury risk and then tapering down fo the final 3 weeks.
I'd be curious to hear how others have approached this, if my rationale for just baking in some extra miles into my runs until the 70.3 should cover it, etc. Are there any plans that I can glom off of that resemble what I am trying to do?
Thanks :)

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For private accounts only, the user is free to change the password. In this case, changing the password does not void your warranty. The user is free to utilize all the streams allowed to run simultaneously and share the account with friends/family at their discretion. These guarantee 99.99% uptime. I doubt that you will need a replacement but I provide a warranty nonetheless :) For shared accounts, the user can only use the service on one device (one stream) and they are not allowed to change any login details. This will enable the account to last even longer past the warranty period. Warranty is as specified above. In case of issues with the account, please PM me with the current details of the account for a replacement. Kindly allow for at most a day for the replacement. This may also apply to regular deliveries. I am not online 24/7 but I try to be online for as long as possible. Kindly be patient as you wait for your ordereplacement. I accept PayPal and BTC (10% discount-may not apply to all items). These prices are in USD and do not include the PayPal transfer fees. The buyer bears the fees. In case you have issues with the payment process, PM me. Sales are final. No refunds or charge-backs will be entertained. However, I retain the right to refuse to transact with anyone and the right to refund proportionately at any point during service. It's the buyer's sole responsibility to find out if the service they are interested in works in their country with/without a VPN and with their specific streaming device before purchasing. Kindly PM me before any purchase to confirm availability and payment instructions. For quicker service, please include the warranty plan you want and your payment method in your first message. The warranty on private accounts does not cover the buyer's personal password hygiene issues or any adverse changes made on the account settings other than changes to the login credentials. It is generally assumed that the password is changed immediately after receipt of the account. The warranty plan starts at the time of purchase and runs uninterrupted unless otherwise stated. It is assumed that the account is used continuously by the buyer after purchase. Limited stock available. Prices and terms may vary over time so kindly refer to my latest thread. All buyers are assumed to have read and agreed to these terms before purchase. 

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Ever since, I think, Merlyn I've noticed a dramatic slowdown in client response time. Now, granted, I'm playing on a pretty low-power Mac laptop so I don't really expect blazing speed. Here's what I've experienced, though. When I first start the client, seemingly any action or seeing anything new in the area results in a large lag where the client pauses for sometimes several seconds. The next time I either do the same thing or see the same thing there is no lag whereby the client will eventually run smoothly. What I often do when I log in and I'm in Caerleon is to just take my character and stand in the middle of town and let it work through the lag for a few minutes as it sees a variety of mounts and gear and sees effects going off from duels and the like and then the game runs just fine. It seems like there's an effects cache or that resources aren't actually loaded until they are needed. While this can be a good thing in many applications, it's causing massive lag until this (apparent) cache is fully populated. Is there a way to pre-populate this cache or turn the caching off (assuming I'm right and it does exist) on startup? Unchecking the setting that says "delete cache" in the client doesnt help ... pls

I have fallen in love in LITG when S2 was out. At this point community here was awesome, but after that it became toxic af. Like I can agree that S3 sucked, while S3 boat party (which was really hated on when it came out) was quite decent. S4 was decent in the same level as boat party, S5 was the worst thing that ever happened in dating sim games history. While S4 was out there was A LOT of haters that the game is bad while now opinion changed that the season was in fact decent. I had another account on reddit then (i was doxxed so i had to create new one) and at this time I praised the game and had A LOT of dislikes. So i switched to CU! community bc LITG one is ALWAYS complaining no matter what.
Proof: now not only S2 is praised but S4 is titled as decent BY MOST which wasnt a thing when it came out. WHILE S6 is as always as every new season since S3 is bad mouthed. I agree it’s not the greatest writing but tbh so far it’s equal to S2.
My reasons: - We have as much starting LIs as in S2 - We don’t have to play nice and MC is still praised - We’re not pushovers
While in S2 MC was mostly too nice and naive (we couldnt stand up for ourselves or say no bc we would be seen as assholes) and S4 had very little amount of LIs to choose from the very start (let’s be honest James/Bruno/Najuma routes were only decent ones, OliveAngie were way too late).
Yes Grace is a lil jealous but its still behaving better than Lottie or Hope. Yes some LIs dialogue/behaviour is the same for every route but lets be honest it happened in every season so far.
Lets give this season a fair chance before it ends. I have a feeling it has potential to be even better than S2 but if we keep hating on every season even before plot unfolds we wont ever get another afterparty seasons or even new season at all.

Hey folks,
Infrequent reddit poster here. I have an interesting case of a cross threaded spark plug that seems to have gotten crossed on when it was being removed. The pressure washer in question uses a 140cc (3Hp) Ducar engine. Anyhow we were visiting the in-laws over Memorial Day weekend and I offered to help him my father-in-law get his pressure washer started after it had been sitting in storage. I usually don’t have issues getting my own small engine equipment up and running, even if they have sat for several years. Figured this would be no different and a good chance to win some brownie points with the in-laws. Engine wouldn’t start with fresh gas so I decided to pull and clean the plug. First few revolutions on the way out the plug turns fine, then it starts to bind. I thought it was just being fussy, maybe an out of spec thread, but then it got stuck.
I don’t know if I caused the cross thread, or if maybe it was done at the factory when the spark plug was installed? At first glance the plug looks like it points straight ahead from the front of the engine, but its actually at a ~3-5° angle. This makes me wonder if I held my socket wrench at the wrong angle and caused it to cross? Is that even possible? Is it just a cheap Chinese engine? The plug is a Torch F6TC. I was able to get it out, but I messed up about 3-4 threads in the hole. I have a back-tap which I am going to use to try and clean up the hole and then hope I don’t owe my father-in-law a new machine.
Has anyone ever seen a cross thread on the way out? Is this something I could have done? I feel pretty guilty over this and don’t want my father in law thinking I’m and idiot -even if I really am.

I bought one for testing for my youtube channel, and the more time I spend with the the angrer I get, I couldn't even finish the gamimg benchmarks I run because it feels like im testing a 2070, I have 1 or 2 more content pieces on it then its going right back....I don't think I have ever tested a worse gpu, for the price point its almost insutling...im not an amd or nvidia fan boy, so no bias when I say this might be the worst gpu I have ever used....

Do u go from being so resolute to beating off thoughts and fantasies about you. Why is my head such a mess. When will it just be back to normal. Anticipating running into you this weekend has my mind in a battle. Do I want to. Am I strong enough. Should I cancel my plans. Should I just go about what I had planned and not give you a second thought. If it happens it happens. I went to the gym this morning. Later than normal. Knowing you had your kid last night. About half way through my routine I felt a little panic coming onwhat if i misjudged. What if you did show up. Would i be able to face you. I know I probably came off rude last night. I have a huge weight on my shoulders and I am already emotional. I hate thinking I possibly hurt your feelings. But you hurt mine and you don't give it a second thought.. you don't really care how you come off. As long as your covering your own ass that's all that ever matters. Here it is. The resilience. I am strong enough to face you. Just don't come to close

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1. For private accounts only, the user is free to change the password. In this case, changing the password does not void your warranty. The user is free to utilize all the streams allowed to run simultaneously and share the account with friends/family at their discretion. These guarantee 99.99% uptime. I doubt that you will need a replacement but I provide a warranty nonetheless :)
2. For shared accounts, the user can only use the service on one device (one stream) and they are not allowed to change any login details. This will enable the account to last even longer past the warranty period.
3. Warranty is as specified above. In case of issues with the account, please PM me with the current details of the account for a replacement. Kindly allow for at most a day for the replacement. This may also apply to regular deliveries. I am not online 24/7 but I try to be online for as long as possible. Kindly be patient as you wait for your ordereplacement.
4. I accept PayPal and BTC (10% discount-may not apply to all items). These prices are in USD and do not include the PayPal transfer fees. The buyer bears the fees. In case you have issues with the payment process, PM me.
5. Sales are final. No refunds or charge-backs will be entertained. However, I retain the right to refuse to transact with anyone and the right to refund proportionately at any point during service. It's the buyer's sole responsibility to find out if the service they are interested in works in their country with/without a VPN and with their specific streaming device before purchasing.
6. Kindly PM me before any purchase to confirm availability and payment instructions. For quicker service, please include the warranty plan you want and your payment method in your first message.
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TLDR: what is another stable, decent paying, future-proof, creative field I could consider?
I'm really struggling trying to figure out if I want to stay in this field or pursue something else entirely. For pretty much my whole life I've just wanted to do something creative. As a kid it was drawing, legos, drums, then guitar, photography, cinematography, then video editing and acting. I fell in love with filmmaking through my major coursework in college around 2011. I began investing in equipment and started freelancing with whatever work I could find. I've lived in Atlanta since 2014 to pursue the TV/film industry. I worked as a production assistant for a year and a half, joined the union for cinematographers to start working my way up. I joined as an entry level position but could not get work despite doing everything the union reps recommended to network, but after a year and a half of paying monthly dues and only working 2 days, I left to keep doing freelance work. Around that same time I decided to try my hand at acting, and was very lucky to get picked up by an agency and start auditioning. I've had some success booking co-staguest star roles on network shows, but haven't booked anything since 2020. I also kept running into conflicts with auditions/callbacks coming up on days I had shoots scheduled. Almost 2 years ago I was offered a pretty good salary with a consulting firm to edit corporate videos. Those offers are pretty hard to come by. I was 32 and tired of living with roommates paycheck to paycheck and wanted to try stability for a change. At first it felt really good for my mental health. I was able to buy a condo which is something I had started to question would ever be in the cards for me, and finally felt okay about turning my brain off from work at 5PM instead of always questioning what I should be doing to make a living.
But now I'm just painfully bored. I work in a typical post-covid office where most of my team is remote. Editing makes you pretty isolated in your work for the most part which would be fine if I actually cared about my projects instead of editing corporate union-busting videos (oh the irony). The only 2 people I do see at my office are much older and more conservative, and days I work from home I don't really talk to anybody so work culture is definitely missing for me. I have been looking for other editing jobs for about 6 months now, but often roles like this are low pay or just delegated to interns.
As for acting, I've really gotten fed up with how that business works. Recording auditions yourself for casting directors is the norm now, and it's required to have someone else in the room read the other lines with you. I usually audition 1-2 times a week, so it's too frequent of a favor to ask of a friend, so I use a paid service to have a scene partner virtually on-demand but the cost of that adds up. I probably spent $1200 last year just auditioning, on top of the multiple online profiles you have to pay for monthly to be submitted for auditions.
This field just feels like a shit show no matter how I try to spin it. If I try to go back to camera work, it's no work-life balance, with 14 hour days being the norm. You won't spot many wedding bands amongst crew members on a film set. Nothing else piqued my interest until I had to pick a major in college and started exploring this field. And I never felt like a regular desk job was for me.
Not to mention the conversations around AI and creatives are really concerning now since I was already fighting for decent pay rates as a freelance videographephotographer.
All I've wanted to do is make things, and I feel like can't figure out how to actually make a life doing that. Basically what I'm asking is...what is another stable, decent paying, future-proof, creative field someone like me could consider?

I thought it might be interesting to look at all the dragonflame events in Dance. I theorize George has provided several detailed examples of dragonflame to help readers understand what is--and what is not--the result of a dragon unleashing fire on a target. By applying this collected knowledge to The Dragontamer chapter, I believe we can throw water on the widely held theory that Quentyn's burns are the result of being bathed in dragonflame.
The first witnessed dragonflame event is in Daenerys II, ADWD. Daenerys goes to the pit to look in on Viserion and Rheghal.

When Rhaegal roared, a gout of yellow flame turned darkness into day for half a heartbeat. The fire licked along the walls, and Dany felt the heat upon her face, like the blast from an oven.

And later...

Viserion's claws scrabbled against the stones, and the huge chains rattled as he tried to make his way to her again. When he could not, he gave a roar, twisted his head back as far as he was able, and spat golden flame at the wall behind him. How soon till his fire burns hot enough to crack stone and melt iron?

So early on we are told dragonflame can be accompanied by a roar and a wash of heat. Dany describes the heat as blast from "an oven".
We see the dragon's again when Daenerys takes Quentyn to the pit.

Rhaegal roared in answer, and fire filled the pit, a spear of red and yellow. Viserion replied, his own flames gold and orange. When he flapped his wings, a cloud of grey ash filled the air. Broken chains clanked and clattered about his legs. Quentyn Martell jumped back a foot. Daenerys VIII, ADWD.

Rhaegal's flame is consistent with the last time. We see a roar and we see the yellow color of the fire.
Drogon shows up in Daenerys IX and provides several examples.

Above them all the dragon turned, dark against the sun. His scales were black, his eyes and horns and spinal plates blood red. Ever the largest of her three, in the wild Drogon had grown larger still. His wings stretched twenty feet from tip to tip, black as jet. He flapped them once as he swept back above the sands, and the sound was like a clap of thunder. The boar raised his head, snorting … and flame engulfed him, black fire shot with red. Dany felt the wash of heat thirty feet away. [...]
His spear remained in Drogon's back, wobbling as the dragon beat his wings. Smoke rose from the wound. As the other spears closed in, the dragon spat fire, bathing two men in black flame. [...]
Drogon roared. The sound filled the pit. A furnace wind engulfed her. The dragon's long scaled neck stretched toward her. When his mouth opened, she could see bits of broken bone and charred flesh between his black teeth. His eyes were molten. I am looking into hell, but I dare not look away. She had never been so certain of anything. If I run from him, he will burn me and devour me. In Westeros the septons spoke of seven hells and seven heavens, but the Seven Kingdoms and their gods were far away. If she died here, Dany wondered, would the horse god of the Dothraki part the grass and claim her for his starry khalasar, so she might ride the nightlands beside her sun-and-stars? Or would the angry gods of Ghis send their harpies to seize her soul and drag her down to torment? Drogon roared full in her face, his breath hot enough to blister skin. Off to her right Dany heard Barristan Selmy shouting, "Me! Try me. Over here. Me!"
With a hisssssss, he spat black fire down at her. Dany darted underneath the flames, swinging the whip and shouting, "No, no, no. Get DOWN!" His answering roar was full of fear and fury, full of pain. His wings beat once, twice …

As with Rheagal, Dany sees a consistent black coloring in Drogon's dragonflame. Drogon does not roar.
Quentyn sees several examples.

Rhaegal took it in the air. His head snapped round, and from between his jaws a lance of flame erupted, a swirling storm of orange-and-yellow fire shot through with veins of green. The sheep was burning before it began to fall. Before the smoking carcass could strike the bricks, the dragon's teeth closed round it. A nimbus of flames still flickered about the body. The air stank of burning wool and brimstone. Dragonstink. [...] The Dragontamer, ADWD.
Viserion launched himself from the ceiling, pale leather wings unfolding, spreading wide. The broken chain dangling from his neck swung wildly. His flame lit the pit, pale gold shot through with red and orange, and the stale air exploded in a cloud of hot ash and sulfur as the white wings beat and beat again. [...] Id.

Dany's POV included many auditory clues such as roaring and hissing. Quentyn's POV notices olfactory clues with the smell of brimstone and sulfur. Quentyn also notices hot ash.

The crossbowman was fumbling for another quarrel as the dragon's teeth closed around his neck. The man wore the mask of a Brazen Beast, the fearsome likeness of a tiger. As he dropped his weapon to try and pry apart Viserion's jaws, flame gouted from the tiger's mouth. The man's eyes burst with soft popping sounds, and the brass around them began to run. The dragon tore off a hunk of flesh, most of the sellsword's neck, then gulped it down as the burning corpse collapsed to the floor. Id.

The crossbowman gets a direct hit of dragonflame at point blank range. Instead of a roar or smell, we are instead shown the impact of the heat. A bronze mask runs and eye's burst from the fire.
And we come to this event in the final Daenerys POV.

Soon one horse began to lag behind the others. The dragon descended on him, roaring, and all at once the poor beast was aflame, yet somehow he kept on running, screaming with every step, until Drogon landed on him and broke his back. Dany clutched the dragon's neck with all her strength to keep from sliding off.
The carcass was too heavy for him to bear back to his lair, so Drogon consumed his kill there, tearing at the charred flesh as the grasses burned around them, the air thick with drifting smoke and the smell of burnt horsehair. Daenerys X, ADWD.

While not fire events, it is important to recognize heat escapes the mouth of a dragon even when it does not unleash dragonflame.

Then the dragon opened its mouth, and light and heat washed over them. Behind a fence of sharp black teeth he glimpsed the furnace glow, the shimmer of a sleeping fire a hundred times brighter than his torch. The Dragontamer.

Dany has a similar experience.

Drogon roared. The sound filled the pit. A furnace wind engulfed her. The dragon's long scaled neck stretched toward her. When his mouth opened, she could see bits of broken bone and charred flesh between his black teeth. His eyes were molten. I am looking into hell, but I dare not look away. She had never been so certain of anything. If I run from him, he will burn me and devour me. Daenerys IX, ADWD.

By looking at what the author tells us, we should expect a dragonflame event to include one or more of the following:

• A roar
• Dragonflame escaping a dragon
• Target is near instantly engulfed in flame
• Bronze will show signs of melting
• Eyes will pop and run
• A wash of intense heat described as a "furnace" or "oven" felt by a witness who is not hit by dragonflame (A witness can also feel this intense heat when a dragon opens its mouth but does not unleash dragonflame)
• Hot ashes
• Odor of brimstone or sulfur

Now we take this information, apply it to the end of the Dragontamer chapter, and test Barristan's theory of Quentyn being hit by dragonflame. Based on what Barristan knows, his conclusion is understandable. He enters a room, sees three people, recognizes two of them as the Dornish knights who travel with Quentyn. He can't tell who the other body is because it is too badly burned. He assumes the body is Quentyn and makes guesses about what preceded his arrival.
We readers do not have to make the same assumption Barristan did because we have much more (and better) information at our disposal. We see the end of The Dragontamer chapter and we see each of the dragonflame events. So we need only compare what we see happen to Q against what we know to expect with a dragonflame event.

Quentyn turned and threw his left arm across his face to shield his eyes from the furnace wind. Rhaegal, he reminded himself, the green one is Rhaegal.
When he raised his whip, he saw that the lash was burning. His hand as well. All of him, all of him was burning.

Quentyn is not burning when he turns. He is not burning when his arm is raised to eyes. He is not burning when he see the green scales. So he was not engulfed in flames at this point. So if he was hit by dragonflame, it was not while his back was turned.
He raises his whip and then notices the lash burning, his hand burn and all of him. So, between seeing Rhaegal and raising the whip, he began to burn. If that burn is due to a dragon, then we should have noted one or more of the events we are told accompanies a dragonflame event in that short passage. Did we?
​

Dragonflame events	Quentyn burning after recognizing Rhaegal
A roar	No
Dragonflame escaping	No
Near instant engulfment	No
Melting or running bronze or brass	No
Eyes pop and run	No because he "saw" the items burning
A wash of intense heat	Yes
Ashes and cinders	No
Sulfur or Brimstone	No

The only element present here is the furnace wind. And as we know, furnace wind alone means either you witnessed dragonflame but you were not hit by it, or the dragon just opened its mouth near you without unleashing dragonflame. The absence of Quentyn seeing dragonflame coming at him (he is looking right at the green scales), and the absence of Q being instantly engulfed in flames, suggests Rhaegal did not unleash on Quentyn. Quentyn sees no ash or cinders. He smells no sulfur or brimstone. Rhaegal is simply breathing near Quentyn when the lash of his whip begins to burn. Rhaegal did not unleash dragonflame on Q.
There likely was a dragonflame event involving Rhaegal, but it did not occur after Quentyn turns to see Rhaegal. It happens while Quentyn's back is turned. Let's now look at the text immediately before Q turns.

And then a hot wind buffeted him and he heard the sound of leathern wings and the air was full of ash and cinders and a monstrous roar went echoing off the scorched and blackened bricks and he could hear his friends shouting wildly. Gerris was calling out his name, over and over, and the big man was bellowing, "Behind you, behind you, behind you!"

Now let's apply the dragonflame test.
​

Dragonflame events	Before Quentyn turns
A roar	Yes
Dragonflame escaping	Not seen by the POV
Near instant engulfment	Not seen by the POV
Melting or running bronze or brass	Not seen by the POV
Eyes pop and run	Not seen by the POV
A wash of intense heat	Yes
Ash and cinders	Yes
Sulfur or Brimstone	Not noted by the POV

We have three elements known to be present with a dragonflame event: roar, a wash of hot air, ash and cinders.
Now because a roar and heat are present, we need to eliminate a non dragonflame event because we are twice told a roar and a wash of heat can be present when a dragon simply opens its mouth. However, the presence of ashes and ciders in the air strongly suggests a recent fire. The pit is already full of ashes but the cinders tell us something was burning very recently. Cinders are never noted to be present during heat only events. Hence, the text supports Rhaegal unleashed fire while Quentyn wasn't looking at Rhaegal.
As Quentyn wasn't looking, neither he--nor the readers--could see what/who may have been hit by the dragonflame so he also can't tell we readers what happened to the possible target. But if there was another target, then something or someone else in the room was set ablaze prior to Q burning. And that someone else could be who Barristan assumed is Quentyn. Barristan does not know a second person was burned and so he concludes this is Q because he has little else to go on.
Given George has associated none of the established dragonflame rules to Quentyn's burning, readers should be very hesitant to claim a direct hit of dragonflame is responsible for the burning. An alternative theory for the burning is spontaneous combustion which George does reference elsewhere in the story.

"Oh, yes, most certainly . . . but carefully, my lord, ever so carefully. As it ages, the substance grows ever more, hmmmm, fickle, let us say. Any flame will set it afire. Any spark. Too much heat and jars will blaze up of their own accord. It is not wise to let them sit in sunlight, even for a short time. Once the fire begins within, the heat causes the substance to expand violently, and the jars shortly fly to pieces. Tyrion V, ACOK.

And while I think it both unlikely and unwise for Q to carry wildfire on him, there are other substances in the story capable of spontaneous combustion. Oil for example is referenced several times in the story as an accelerant. And we are told several times whips are maintained with oil/grease. The elements of spontaneous combustion (a low ignition point substance, exposure to heat, dry enclosed conditions) are all present in the pit and they far better align with Q's burning than the dragonflame theory. An oil fire would spread starting from the source of the ignition to the adjacent areas (whip, hand, all). Alternatively, dragonflame engulfs a target immediately and entirely (sheep, boar, Barsena, the two men in the pit).
Applying the text as it is presented to us by the author strongly suggest Quentyn was not hit by dragonflame. This scientific model makes sense to me because I believe I am reading a science fiction story. Therefore, I look for a scientific explanation for why a supposed dragonflame events bears none of the established hallmarks of a dragonflame event. Others community members believe they are reading a fantasy story. Therefore, inconsistencies or unexplained events are easily attributed to magic. It could be either or both. At any rate, diversity of thought it a wonderful thing.
I think Quentyn is an important character who will have significant plot importance in the books to (hopefully) come. Perhaps my admiration and hope for this character has clouded my objectivity, which is why I continue to post my thoughts on the subject here for feedback from the knowledgeable, passionate, and unfailingly civil members of the community.
But what say ye, fine redditors? Did George set up all the dragonflame events in ADWD to reward careful and suspicious readers, or is the shocking lack of detail surrounding how Quentyn came to be burning just artistry, magic, and a weariness of hand-holding? If I've missed or misrepresented a relevant dragonflame event in Dance, please let me know. As always, polite disagreement and constructive criticism is welcome.
TL;DR: Quentyn was not hit by dragonflame. His burning bears none of the established hallmarks for a dragonflame event in ADWD.

This post is probably really disjointed and I apologize for that. Please let me know how I can clarify to make it easier to understand (and thank you for trying to understand regardless).
I haven’t had a “real job” in over 2 years. A few months after leaving my last job my therapist at the time suggested that I should look into the possibility that I am on the autism spectrum in addition to the ADHD I was already being medicated for. It’s taken a while to adjust to it and since then I’ve been absolutely terrified of interacting with just about anyone, because it really hammered home that my gut feeling that people were judging me and didn’t want me around was probably true. That fear seems to amplify my social struggles – it’s hard not to tell myself that every single problem I’ve ever had with colleagues, employers, even strangers has been my fault. Even if it wasn’t, I was usually the person who had to pay the price somehow. The world is a scary place and it’s overwhelming to even leave my house sometimes. I live in a rural area and if I’m outside and so much as hear a vehicle coming down the road I run and hide so I don’t offend someone by existing in my own yard.
I have a graduate degree but I don’t think many people would guess that. I don’t have much of a desire to use my education and I don’t have the money to pursue education in another field. I didn’t really choose my educational field with money in mind, I guess it just interested me at the time. My husband makes decent money, but with inflation and unexpected vet bills and everything things have been tight financially for a while. He’s been hinting to me that I might need to start looking for a job at some point soon, and I am so lost. My resumé is all over the place – manual labour, academic positions, etc. – and prior to taking time off from employment I tended to find myself in environments where there was a really clique-y atmosphere and I inevitably would be singled out and targeted. So not only does my job history not really make sense, I have no one to vouch for me.
And that’s not to mention that I’m overwhelmed just existing at home! We have several special needs pets that I tend to, so it kind of feels like I’m running an animal shelter. I don’t think my husband understands how much time it takes to “recover” from simply leaving the house. So full-time work is not likely to be something I can do well at for long.
I originally started typing this looking for advice and now I don’t know what kind of advice I’m even looking for. I know I’m not the only one who is or has been in this situation, but it really feels hopeless. Looking through the available jobs that don’t train, don’t pay much, and require damn near all of an applicant’s waking hours is discouraging. And that’s not even to speak of the bullshit that is job interviews!

Hello fellas. As the title says, it think i might still be psychotic. I had a schizophrenic/psychotic episode for about a year or so (started when i was 12, ended when i was 14). I was on some very strong medications which did cause me a lot of other problems but stopped my hallucinations pretty much completely. I got off those meds a few months ago, in October of last year i think, and i'd say my life has been better since, but im only now realizing that i may have some residual symptoms. No one told me anything about that nor about the side effects of the meds i was on, so it could be both of those, but apart from my cognitive abilities dropping ever so slighlty i've realized i still have some hallucinations. They're mild, of course. It's still mostly me seeing something quickly rush past me, or feeling like i just saw a word on the page that wasn't there, or someone calling my name every now and then. They're never clear or big either, the most id hallucinate is seeing a sillhuette of a cat run past me. All of those would give me a scare for a moment but after a second id realize that they're not real. I wasn't aware that these could be an issue due to my previous condition being much worse and no one else telling me anything(not even my therapist) but i recently learned about Residual Schizophrenia and it does sound a lot like my symptoms, like the disorganized thoughts, speech issues, etc. I also have awful memory problems and some problems with derealazation which im not sure if they're related or not to this. For example, id sometimes feel as if could just no-clip thru other people or as if everything is just flashing before my eyes and i can't latch onto a moment.
I'm scared of bringing this up with my experience with my old meds and therapist was rather traumatizing to say the least, but i would love to hear other peoples advice.
Thank you.

I was scheduled for a hysterectomy on the 14th. At 22yo. Because my cramps are the most pain I have ever experienced. I have been hit by a pickup truck, thrown, and run over again and it didn’t hurt as bad as my cramps. I presented as a stroke code because my pain was so severe my blood pressure was sustained 210/180 (I have photos). I have been found unconscious in the bathtub because the running water heat is the only thing that makes a dent in them. I have hallucinated and then passed out for hours from pain. I have been given every pain med known to man in hospitals and I have home prescriptions for tramadol, oxy, gabapentin, and flexeril. I have resorted to crushing them and snorting them with alcohol to knock myself out. I’ve had to be intubated because of how I cope with the pain to even bring it from a 10/10 to a 9/10.
And my insurance made a mistake. My surgeon isn’t covered. They don’t know who is. I can’t afford it out of pocket. I can’t live like this. I haven’t even had my period this month and I’ve had cramps for 8 days. Endometriosis is going to kill me. The other day I was wailing and screaming in pain to the extent that the police showed up at my home. Please someone help me. Advice. Support. Recommendations? I can’t do this anymore. I’m desperate.

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So for a month straight, I read nothing but Iain M. Banks. I've now finished (in the following order):

• The Player of Games
• Use of Weapons
• Consider Phlebas
• The State of the Art
• Excession

I'm still undecided how I feel about the Culture series. I don't think I love it (not yet, at least), but it's certainly a strong like and admiration, which is also growing in time. Banks' writing style is not 100 percent my cup of tea, and I'm not enjoying the reading process as much as I might. But then I finish, and I can't stop thinking about it, running it over and over in my mind. This, for me, is a sure sign of a good book.
One of the things I like most about Banks is the way he experiments with different story structures and narrative techniques. None of the books I've read was similar to any of the others. I tend to get series fatigue when I read more than 2-3 books by the same author at a time, but these were different enough to mitigate it. I also really appreciate an author who manages to surprise me, who subverts my expectations and fucks with my mind a bit. Boy, does the Culture have this in spades.
I went by recommendation to skip Consider Phlebas and start the series with The Player of Games, but it was the wrong choice for me. Player was probably my least favorite of the books I've read so far. A lot of it has to do with Gurgeh, who I just didn't find a captivating character. I don't need my characters to be likeable (does Banks even do those?), but I certainly want them to be interesting. For the first part of the book, the main Gurgeh's character trait was bored. The book only picked up when he finally got to Azad and started playing. I felt the ending was the strongest part of the book; but then, Banks is generally really good at mind-blowing endings.
Use of Weapons might have been my favorite. I didn't think so after my first read, but I caved in to the urge to reread it a week later, and it hit a lot harder the second time. It's crazy that the book with a massive twist in the end benefits so much from a reread. Knowing who "Zalakwe" is and what he's done, his entire journey becomes very different; it's also really satisfying to notice the little hints scattered here and there that went over my head the first time.
Contrary to the popular opinion, I quite enjoyed Consider Phlebas. It was much more action packed than the kind of things I usually read, and I found that refreshing, especially after the heavy hitter that was Use of Weapons. Yeah, the middle of the book was a bit pointless, and I really wish I skipped the whole Eaters chapter instead of only the grossest bits. But everything after finally getting to Schar's World was perfection. The gradual build-up of tension in the train sequence was so masterfully done, I was squirming in my seat. And Horza, so sure of his righteousness and the importance of his mission, but proven to be so inconsequential in the end. I felt quite sorry for him, even though he was a massive asshole.
The State of the Art was an enjoyable little "what-if" thought experiment, but I found the short stories, with the exception of Descendant and the darkly funny Odd Attachment, rather lackluster and forgettable.
Excession... I only finished it a couple days earlier and I still can't wrap my mind around it. People say Use of Weapons is hard to follow? It was a walk in the park compared to this. For the life of me, I couldn't keep all the ships straight in my head. I started taking notes about 150 pages in (haven't felt the need for that since my first read of the Silmarillion), and I was still lost as to who's conspiring with whom. It really warrants a reread, maybe even several, to put everything into place.
This book was equal amounts great and frustrating. It had as many characters and plotlines as several installments of The Expanse crammed into one novel, some of them episodic and not going anywhere, others given more space than they deserve. By the end I was so done with every single egotistical, whiny, overdramatic human being in the book and their petty dramas (with the possible exception of the poor hermit guy, who just wanted to be left alone), I wished the ships would just jettison them all into space. The Minds, however, were everything I've ever wanted. Brilliant, witty, scheming, and eventually fucking up despite their massively superior intelects. The part where Sleeper Service shakes off its tail, with the other ship left absolutely befuddled, was probably my favorite moment in all 5 books, and I still get the chills remembering "Let's talk, shall we?"
Despite some of my gripes, this has been a very fulfilling month. I'll now take a much deserved break and catch up on the rest of my TBR, but I'll happily return to The Culture sometime later in the year, when I'm again in the mood for something mind-bending and thought-provoking.

Just found this sub the other day, wish I’d found it sooner to be honest. I sent the “badgebot” a message and got a counter. To be honest, I’m not exactly sure which day in September was my last. I think it was the week after Labor Day, but I’m not sure so I picked 9/15. Feeling a little proud I’ve made it this far. I was in a bad place, drinking liquor daily and large amounts of it. My body didn’t even really recognize beer as alcohol anymore, I’m sure it did, but it certainly wouldn’t scratch the itch.
I like this group’s IWNDWYT. I won’t drink today, that’s for sure. Probably not tomorrow, but never know I guess.
In the past 265 days I’ve had all sorts of experiences, I’ve lost a job at a time I was expecting a promotion, I’ve gone to ball games, I’ve played with my kids, I got a new job which is the best I’ve ever had, I went on a vacation, I celebrated a birthday, had Christmas and new years, and done much needed soul searching and relationship building and rebuilding.
Just want to say I never want to go back to the place I was when I quit. I knew it would be a rough couple days. My last scotch was later in the night after that morning I decided to quit. I drank it in a pool of sweat, with shaky hands and a body that felt like it had electric pulses going through it, my heart was racing and it was clear I either needed to drink it or go to the ER for medical attention.
I hold that shameful memory pretty close to me. I’m a husband, father, hard worker, educated and in order to kick booze I had to have one in the middle of the night not to go to the hospital and continue the fight.
The first month I thought about whiskey everyday. By the third month, I had nearly convinced myself (as I had once before) that after a period of time I could drink again like a normal person. At day 265 I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that if I have one more drink a year will pass and if I stop I’ll be sweating in a bed with mini bottles on the nightstand trying not to go to the hospital. At least the last time I still had a wife and children under the same roof.
She never threatened, but I could tell that if there was another 72 hour dry out required, I wouldn’t have smiling kids and a wife that respected what I was doing to greet me when I came out of the room for a cup of coffee.
The comments I’ve seen here are inspiring and supportive and grateful to have found you.

Have you ever had a run-in with the law, either as a suspect or witness?