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New Terran Refugee (Pt - 20) : An NOP fanfic
Thanks to u/SpacePaladin15 for letting people write fanfics.
This is just a fanfic of course.
This chapter went through several iterations, I might have let myself think I could release it 1 week late (and failed). Also, I might have gotten sidetracked with other non-writing thing, oops.
TL;DR:
“OOPS! All Rewrites! And side projects!” – Me
In any case, here’s the chapter:
Memory transcription subject: Tayla, Venlil Widow
Date [standardized human time]: October 18, 2136
The first thing I became aware of was that I had awoken enveloping a richly warm pillow with a soft surface from above, and that not only was it hot but that it was also soft and squishy but without too much give, in fact it was somehow firmer below the surface, I snuggled closer to the material that was emanating heat below me and drove off my mind’s attempts at waking me up, this was too blissful an experience to stop suddenly.
The second thing I became aware of was that I didn’t remember replacing my heated pillow as the cold wind season was still expected to be a good deal of time away and that I had much more important things to spend my limited budget on.
The third thing I became aware of was that I wasn’t hugging a pillow, this only happened when I noticed that it wasn’t moving because I was snuggling into it, but rather moving in a steady motion against me, like when someone breathes while asleep.
The fourth thing I became aware of, were the memories of what led me into this situation ‘Just gonna close my eyes for a moment’; Why did I lie to myself like that?
The final thing I became aware of snapped me out of my musings, it was the reason I woke up, and the reason I had crashed so hard into sleepiness.
The consequence of drinking copious amounts of [shade root] tea to keep watch over Jorge until I could call the number in the email during the schedule it had included beneath itself, this was made worse by the cans of ‘Twilight Energy’ I had drank at the end when more drastic measures had to be taken.
I couldn’t ignore it I couldn’t help but feel the pressure mounting inside my bladder as I peeled myself off from on top of Jorge. Why did I move so much while asleep?
Oh Protector, I missed his warmth already…
I made a mental note to look into repairing my heated pillow for cheap due to a sudden urge to sleep with something warm more frequently, the abrupt thought jogging loose some memories about contact information of some local repairvenlil I’d called before for one reason or another, along with the memory of the number I called before… napping with Jorge…
A great feeling of chagrin manifested along with my bloom while closing Jorge’s bathroom door behind me as I remembered the text beneath the schedule, ‘Extended working hours during emergency situations’, the aftermath of antimatter bombing definitely applied… especially since that Mrs. Bennet sounded so exhausted so soon after the supposed start of her work claw.
I decided to chalk up my lapse in judgement to have been due to how Jorge’s expression before he sealed himself in had left my thoughts racing and heart pounding in worry over him.
With my thoughts somewhat settled, I examined the strange toilet that had been installed, before throwing caution to the winds when the urgency I felt reasserted itself with force.
…
After closing the lid and washing my paws, I finally found what had to be the equivalent of the pulley and chain, a small, recessed button parted into 2 asymmetric parts on the top middle part behind the seat.
I pressed both parts at the same time just in case.
FWOOOSH
A small eep escaped me but was drowned out by the noises that were still coming from the strange toilet!
Finally, the ruckus ended, letting me calm down from the unexpected loudness. Wait, did that noise wak-
THUNK THUNK THUNK
A bigger eep escaped me as I jumped a little into the air; However this time it wasn’t drowned out by another noise.
“¿you ok in there?” I could barely make out Jorge’s voice through the door, like he was putting in the barest effort needed to speak.
“Y-yeah, j-just startled…” I opened the door as I trailed off, a sudden realization had me asking him a question, “I guess I know how It felt w-when I s-startled you h-huh?”
His normally expressive face remained still, the only reaction to my attempt at lightening the mood a brief exhale from his nose; He simply slipped past me as I left the bathroom and muttered something I didn’t quite hear just before shutting the door softly.
I went back to the bed and turned on his pad, after a few seconds of waiting for it to turn on, and a few more waiting for my translator to parse the strange [date and time] format the humans used (Honestly, who separated the [hours] and the [days/months] like that?) I felt a bit of relief as I sank a bit into the still warm bed.
According to the pad, I’d just taken a short nap, I still had plenty of time until my children came back home, hopefully I had enough time to actually have some kind of talk with Jorge.
I’d have to somehow get him to talk about last Paw’s… reaction of his, and find a way to convince him to talk about his family, It’d be good for him to recognize that pain, maybe he’d even hold onto it like me…
^FWOOOSH
That thing that the humans called a toilet interrupted my train of thought before I could do more than think of the barest of ways I could breeze into such heavy topics, the small delay between the toilet’s sound, the groaning of water travelling to the faucet, and the door opening wasn’t even enough to get back on my mind’s [zephyr].
A quick focus on Jorge’s face made my determination start to breeze away a bit, it was much easier to think of how to talk to him when I couldn’t see just how heavily everything [to wear down like a long strong gale would] on him.
Jorge deflated slightly but visibly at how I apparently froze up at the sight of him.
“well, thanks, i… feel better, you can just… leave me be for now”
Jorge stood still, averting his eyes from me until he shrugged strangely after turning to look at the barricade, he then shuffled over and started to shift it to the side a bit, evidently wishing to put it back in place after I left.
“ah” he cleared his throat, “sorry, you can leave now” he returned to averting his eyes from looking at me and awkwardly motioned towards the wide opening he had made after dragging the barricade as he stepped away morosely.
“Jorge.” I paused to breathe; I’d managed to huff out his name just as I needed to exhale.
Jorge stood still for a moment before tentatively focusing on me, a strangely vulnerable expression sat on his face.
I patted the bed (an appropriate and proper distance away from me) with my tail before curling it away from the spot, he seemed to get the message and soon he had sat down beside me, brief moment of hesitation notwithstanding.
I turned my head towards him as I’d seen him do when talking, he flinched a little when his eyes met mine, closing them and averting his face, I reached out for his nearby claw with my tail and put it down gently on top.
I waited patiently for him to start talking; Thankfully the wait was short.
“this… ¿is this about… my reaction yesterday?”
“Yes,” I squeezed down on his claw softly with my tail in a comforting gesture, “I wanted to speak with you about that sooner, but for now…” another gentle squeeze, “I’m just glad you seem to be doing a little bit better.”
Silence enveloped us as Jorge seemed to mull over what I’d just said.
A small hint of a hunch had me examining him more closely, it seemed he was anxiously waiting for me to talk some more.
I chastised myself internally, ‘Of course he wasn’t going to be feeling very talkative…’, how could someone jump straight into talking about such a topic? It’d probably be better to start with other stuff and gauge things from there; With that my mind sifted through possible topics until one stood out.
“S-so, I kind of… used up a lot of your powdered ingredients… heh…” I took in his features, he seemed halfway here and halfway far away.
Maybe… Maybe if I somehow mentioned the call to remind him that there were more humans he could try talking to? Just in case he was getting tired of my clumsy attempts at talking with him…
“I, uh, didn’t think of asking Mrs. Bennet about their availability when I called her this Paw, s-sorry about that… b-but I’m sure they’ll get some more that you can use soon, right?”
That got a reaction, a small one, out of him; His eyes widened. It… felt wrong.
“o-oh, well, i’d better get started packing then…”
An impossibly heavy weight settled deep inside my stomach as he moved his claw out from under my frozen tail tip, my throat clenched up as Jorge got up and limply started wading to his bag.
I stared in mute horror as he dumped his clean body coverings into it, trying to communicate anything to him, and failing miserably as the sheer disbelief of just how horribly I had miscommunicated kept me frozen, while the pain and betrayal I could imagine him feeling kept my mind reeling.
He stopped just as he reached his bag, his claws clenched for a moment before he unclenched them slowly and turned around to look directly at me.
He’d shed more tears, his eyes were an ugly and fresher shade of red.
“y-you were waiting down here for me to wake up again just to have this conversation as soon as possible. ¿am i right?”
Th-this wasn’t supposed to go like this!
“I… I was-”
“I!” interrupted Jorge with an elevated tone of voice, “…Earlier, I woke up and went back to sleep a few times, I could see you sitting on the stairs, sometimes you and your pad would be missing, I kept thinking that maybe you were worried about me ¿you know?”
“I-” An intense look from him kept the rest of my response in my head; ‘I was!’ I wanted to plead.
“I guess you didn’t plan for me falling asleep after crying…” He trailed off and seemed to go into deep thought for a moment, before his eyes narrowed dangerously. “¿Did you just bring me that Atole to soften the blow?” He held up one of his claws towards me while making a stabbing motion with it, his voice came out as a much lower growl than normal from him. “¿Or was putting me to sleep part of the plan?”
My face felt as if I’d been hit by an icy gale. ‘Did he just insinua-?’
“You’re fucking heartless.” That last sentence from him was punctuated by a fresh set of tears from his eyes, though no sobbing came from him as he let himself fall backwards down onto the floor, like a puppet with its strings suddenly cut.
My heart was beating wildly, and my eyes stung from the horrible accusations that he was making, and from how I’d probably be doing just what he had said if this had happened a few days ago…
I gave myself a moment to recollect myself, I’d thought similar enough things when I was alone in the hospital after losing my family, not nearly as extreme but… my circumstances back then and his right now weren’t comparable.
I shuddered internally at how much worse I’d have fared if it had been Venlil Prime that had been attacked; I’d probably… I’d have tried to do what he tried last night…
With a sigh I focused consciously on Jorge, who was breathing a bit more steadily now, as I picked up the bottle and moved steadily towards his alert gaze.
I sat down in front of him and opened the bottle, he narrowed his eyes even further in response, making the redness and glistening more pronounced, the patches of fur above his eyes changed position as well; I didn’t quite know what it meant, but it couldn’t possibly have been from him feeling happy or at peace.
I pushed through the sense of fear that was starting to form from being under his stare and took in the rest of his body language… I readjusted my position and observed as he flinched away from me…
I slowly raised the bottle and drank; The patches of fur over his eyes returned to their normal position, overshot and stayed raised while the intensity of his stare diminished. Finally, he tilted his head ever so slightly.
After a few gulps more I stopped drinking and offered him the bottle, he still wasn’t accepting it; I wiped my lips and prepared to speak.
“…I wouldn’t do that to you…” A small quiver at the end made me trail off until I was certain my voice wouldn’t fail me. I wouldn’t do that now. “None of those things, I mean… Even after all I did… You gave me a chance…”
“When you put it like that…” Jorge wiped his eyes. “I mean, I don’t know what came over me…” He looked to the side and deflated a little.
“I understand… I was like this too…” A small shiver traveled through my spine, thinking about it always did… I ignored the shiver by standing up and offering him the bottle again, this time he grabbed it and drank deeply.
He trailed behind me, we sat down on opposite sides of the bed, him hugging his legs as he sat against the wall, and me with one leg over the edge of the bed with the other one crossed over it.
Dozens of starting points were flurrying in my head, I couldn’t decide on one, so I cleared my throat and let myself say whatever came out first.
“I’m married.” Jorge became extremely visibly confused. “I-I’m a Widow, I meant to say…” The familiar sting of pain grounded me as his expression changed into one I could recognize even from him, pity.
“He-” died “…It happened 11 years ago, I… I lost my family at the same time…”
Jorge’s expression softened even more, no longer out of pity, but out of understanding… of the pain we shared…
“It was my dad’s idea, he’s always wanted to have a big family homestead… when the latest batch of colonies were finally cleared for habitation he bought a plot immediately, my sister and her husband went with them first, then my brother and his wife, and finally me and…”
This whole talking thing was much harder than I thought… I cleared my throat; I couldn’t go on just omitting any names in my retelling…
“Krayla, that’s my mother’s name.” I paused, waiting for his reaction, he ‘nodded’ slowly, solemnly. “Tavk’io, my dad; Talnum, my b-brother; Tahyiya, m-my sister; …a-and Glim, m-my husband…”
I buried my head in my paws, this was too much…
A moment passed, I felt something brush against my tail; Opening my eyes I saw that it was Jorge’s claw, he patted the tip gently until his eyes met mine.
“Emiliano José Cauich Ayala, t-that’s my father’s name.” He paused to breathe and wiped his eyes. “Ixchel Paola Rojas Canul, that’s my mother’s name.”
We stayed in silence for a while longer, at least in my case recovering from the emotional toll that I had just gone through.
“S-shortly after we arrived at the colony,” I began. “I l-learned I was p-pregnant, G-Glim and I celebrated it with my family, we were going to name our baby after my brother and his wife, Kiyomi. It… It was something we had all come up with [years] before, everything was going just like we had dreamed and talked so much about…”
I squeezed my tail against myself, all those nights at the colony laughing and joking with each other about increasingly outlandish names (ones that we’d never use of course), gone just like that…
“G-Glim and Talnum were busy helping the colony expand by clearing new plots for development and as buffer zones, I helped around with Taylee and Talim when needed but I helped dad with the house most of the time; There were always things that needed to be taken care of after all. Th-then one day in the colony, I f-fainted while picking up Taylee and Talim from school, a f-few [weeks] after that… I had to be sent back here since the colony’s hospital had lost their last equipment shipment to an Arxur raid.” I paused and lowered my voice. “G-Glim stayed behind to take extra assignments, t-to cover expenses, h-he… he was… he was on his last pawful of shifts b-before leave wh-when…”
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“…D-dad was at home looking after the kids, he’d sprained his leg while doing some maintenance, he called me early in the morning there, Talnum and Glim were in some kind of assignment together, and my mother had taken everyone else to get stuff from the market to prepare a farewell meal f-for Glim…” And after that… “The call disconnected abruptly, it had happened before so I… I j-joked to m-myself a-and the nurse that it was p-probably j-just the signal failing because I wasn’t there to maintain things p-properly…”
Tears started forming in my eyes again, Jorge shuffled closer, put his soft claw on my shoulder and gave a light squeeze, his warmth spread throughout me.
“…A few claws later I learnt the truth, that the colony had been raided and that the shelter had been breached, shortly after that, I… I lost my…” I did my best to look him directly in his eyes. “After that… I started planning how to get to the hospital’s roof…” There, a glint of recognition and pain in his eyes. “I was just waiting for the rescue fleet to finish up there, just in case, thankfully… my dad hid Taylee and Talim in one of the [Kitchen] cabinets after taking down the family pictures, since he couldn’t take them to the shelter, he… Taylee told me that he… he begged her to keep quiet before closing the cabinet. She stayed in there with Talim for I don’t even know how long… She… She hasn’t talked about it ever again.”
Another squeeze, then silence and cold as he retracted his claw back towards him, his face turning to another side while taking on some kind of thoughtful intensity.
“S-So… What I’ve been trying to say was… I kind of understand what you’re going through… A-and if you want to talk… I-I’m here?”
A small ‘nod’, and more silence. My eyes were beginning to feel heavy again, that nap hadn’t been enough it seemed.
Jorge harrumphed, causing a bolt of wakefulness to course through me as he began speaking, filling in the silence that had fallen on the room.
“…I don’t think I’m ready yet…” His face turned towards me once more. “But… thank you, for sharing, and for worrying about me, I… If you hadn’t been there when I drifted into and out of sleep…” His eyes widened in a flash. “Wait. ¿You haven’t slept right? ¿Are you feeling OK?”
“I-I t-took a nap after you f-fell asleep…” B-beneath him… “Y-you left a lot of space…” He did, but I couldn’t get to it from under his legs…
“Good, good…” His eyes flicked between me and the door. “Well… I suppose you’ve got stuff to do now. ¿Am I right?” Somehow, the expression that sat now on his face felt forced in a way. I kept quiet as I rummaged through my memories of The Aftermath.
Of course, he was trying to get me out to wallow in peace, just as I did…
That was the last thing he needed right now.
I needed to find a way to get him out of this room…
“Actually… I’m free until my kids get back, I’m used to taking care of chores quickly.”
“Right…” Jorge seemed to slowly steel himself, if I didn’t interrupt me, he’d just ask me to leave directly…
I tried to think faster, but the drowsiness was returning in force, it was no use… Unless…
“H-Hey!” My exclamation startled him, I pressed on to keep the momentum strong. “I uh, I kind of went through my whole supply of [shade root] tea to stay awake…” I didn’t. “And… I don’t really want to drink more energy drinks this Paw, I don’t suppose you have something to stay awake with you?”
Jorge blinked, again, once more, and again one last time before responding.
“¿I… think I have some coffee I could make?” He tilted his head adorably to one side as he scratched his head with one claw.
“Sounds perfect! Would you please make me some?” I stood up before he could even answer, reached for his idle claw and tugged at it towards me; He stood up in what seemed like a daze out of reflex.
We spent the next few [minutes] browsing the intact shelf, whatever this coffee was, it wasn’t there, the tentatively positive mood that had formed cracked a little as Jorge looked at the shelf barricade before he trudged over to it, stopping beside it where he gestured at vaguely with his claw.
We stepped past the barricade, tried not to look at each other, failed, shuffled in place for a moment and began sifting through the items strewn about the floor in an unspoken agreement.
It wasn’t long until I found myself holding a container that my translator insisted was labeled ‘Instant Coffee’. “Hey,” I started while turning, “is this the ri-” Jorge was looking intensely at something on the floor, I followed his gaze and saw it, the broken remains of the flame projector.
“J-Jorge?” I extended my tail cautiously towards his arm, his claws ceased to strain against themselves following the subtle flinch he had when the tip of my tail made contact with him.
I gave him the ‘Instant Coffee’ I was holding and scooped up the remains to dispose of them properly this time; Jorge held up the container and murmured an affirmation at me, I gestured for him to lead the way and proceeded to follow him to the [kitchen].
I raced my way directly to the trash container, separated the single-use fuel cannister from the remains I was holding, and dumped the inert bits inside; I’d have to take this last part to a proper disposal collection point in town some other time. For now, I glanced at Jorge and tucked it into a discreet spot in the cabinets when he wasn’t looking. Only after that did I notice what a mess I’d made up here despite my best efforts at cleaning up…
Jorge’s eyes were scanning all over the [kitchen], taking in every splotch, every spill and every crusted over utensil I’d used, he lingered noticeably longer on the open and haphazardly arranged containers of his that I had used, finally he stared at the Vanilla Extract bottle with a soft expression, it was the only container that had remained completely spotless and didn’t have a significant amount of its contents drained.
Yet another unreadable expression had settled on his face as he took a big pot and barely put any water in it, the other more reasonably sized ones just too dirty to deal with quickly, before putting it to boil on the [stove top].
“Uh…” He shifted his weight from one leg to the other a few times. “I… never did thank you for the drink earlier ¿Didn’t I?”
“N-no but there’s no ne-”
The patches of fur above his eyes furrowed together.
“You… mentioned before that you entered the program for money…” He looked confused. “¿Why didn’t you just… ask for me to be picked up? You’d have gotten someone else in no time… Hell, I’d still understand if you did it now. You don’t have to go through all this trouble for me.” The confused expression deepened as he gestured at the messy remains around us.
“…”
He was waiting for an answer.
“I… w-well I d-did enter for the money… b-but… I don’t want to just replace you… I like being around you. I d-don’t know if we’re there yet… But I’d like to be… f-friends! W-with you someday…” Oh Protector, I couldn’t be more obvious unless I just came out and said it…
“Well for what it’s worth… Thank you Tayla, you don’t know what that means to me right now.” He was looking directly at me, with raw emotion and palpable aliveness, my face started to feel as if I was standing under sunlight…
“I-It was the l-least I could d-do…” It was worth it even though he didn’t seem to understand quite what I accidentally meant before…
I was spared from further embarrassment by the pot of water sizzling violently behind Jorge who turned around in a blur to turn the heat off, while he did that I grabbed two (clean) mugs and set them down near him, though I didn’t move my paws quite fast enough as his claw brushed against me while he moved the mugs closer to him to pour the water on them.
He let the water cool down a little as he put his sugar and ‘Instant Coffee’ containers close to the mugs; He poured the less-than-boiling water into the mugs, stirred in a measure of ‘Instant Coffee’ and a measure of sugar as well.
He passed me a mug with a cryptic warning. “If it’s not to your taste, let me know.” Then he grabbed the other one, sipped a little and waited.
The mischievous glint in his eyes left me no choice, I’d have to play along for now; I raised the mug and sipped…
SPEH
WHY WAS EVERYTHING THESE HUMANS HAD SO BITTER?
I futilely attempted to remove the grimace from my face; Strangely, the roar of laughter I expected was nowhere to be heard, I found myself looking at Jorge with some amount of concern, though the clear, if understated, smile he sported calmed me down somewhat.
Wordlessly, Jorge reached for my mug and the can of powdered coconut milk, he then proceeded to mix in a little of it in both mugs, turning the liquid from a dark oily brown to a much lighter tone. Finally he mixed in a single drop of his Vanilla Extract in each mug and gave me back mine.
I gave him the best glare I could manage as I pouted at him, he took a deep drink from his own mug and held it up for me to examine.
With a sigh I tried mine again.
Warm. Flowery. Smooth. Bitter but not too much, like a perfectly harvested root. But most importantly of all, I could feel myself waking slightly more already, whether it was just self-suggestion or the drink having an effect so soon I couldn’t tell.
Once more, the reaction I expected from Jorge was missing, this time he seemed to be lost in thought, staring at a distant point in the air.
I took a moment to examine him, whatever he was thinking, it was starting to fester. It’d be better to get him talking “What’s wrong?” I asked.
“It’s no-” He shook his head. “It’s just… I… my dad… he liked to drink his without adding anything, no sugar, no… coconut milk…, and… me and mom used to tease him about it…” He was retreating into himself once more.
I kept drinking my coffee; There had to be something else I could talk with him about…
Jorge straightened up, something about his posture, about the way he held himself had changed.
“Say… Tayla… ¿Can I ask you for a favor?” Despite the confidence he exuded he was running one of his claws over the back of his mug repeatedly.
“W-what kind of favor?”
“There’s something I want, no, something I need to make for the end of the [month], and… I’m going to need your help getting the stuff, I’d just ask you to get it all for me, but honestly that wouldn’t be right.”
“O-ok, but you still haven’t told me what the favor is?”
“I need to buy flowers, candles, a good tablecloth, and see what dishes I can actually make here that’d be good enough.”
“W-What for?” W-Was he? My heart was beating wildly in a peculiar mix of elation, nervousness and apprehension.
“I’m going to make an Altar for Day of the Dead (Día de Muertos), it’s the least I can do for my family all the way over here.”
W-
Wh-
WHAT?

Hey friends!
At this time in history when it is so obvious we need to care for each other to create the best possible environment for us all, this projected move by reddit is horrifying.
As I'm sure many of you know, reddit plans to price its APIs out of the reach of most third-party apps, giving these apps no option but to cease operations.

• It hurts me to know that people with disabilities will be further inconvenienced, and some will be unable to particpate on reddit, period.
  
• It upsets me to know NSFW subreddits may be outright banned from existing on third-party apps.
  
• I question what will happen to NSFW posts, and don't hold my breath hoping for an answer.
  

For the record, I don't accept the "if the developers made their coding more efficient, they could afford to pay for what they need." How would anyone at reddit know, considering their own code breaks on the regular and after how many years they still can't combine functionalities of old and new reddit to work on both mobile and non-mobile devices? Does anyone in the exec level of reddit use their own often broken, occasionally useful reddit app? Do not speak to me of efficiencies that you yourself cannot create.
From June 12 to 14, 2023, I won't be posting to LGWrites or any other subreddit I mod at or upload to, unless there's something that must be made public.
I would be delighted to break the blackout on June 13th to announce reddit is doing the right thing by setting reasonable pricing.
Thank you all.

I (26M) have been working mostly in the hospitality industry since I was about 16. Started as a dishwasher, moved to prep, then started line cooking. I've worked as a sous chef, and even kind of temporarily held down a chef position in a fine dining restaurant while we were in between chefs. In between kitchen work I have managed a ski rental shop, did 4 months as a sales associate at Verizon (lol), and even roofed one summer between college semesters. I have a few years of college classes under my belt, I haven't gone very far as I have changed majors a few times. I don't know my current GPA, but I imagine it's not the best. Decent amount of W's and unflattering grades, but there have been a few semesters where I've earned A's in every class. In my defense, I have always worked full time, being a full time student and worker is challenging.
Anyway... 3 years ago, a few friends, my brother, and I thought it would be a great idea to open a our own restaurant. I was not a key player in the beginning. My brother is an amazing chef, food has always been a huge passion of his. The friends who took on the project with us consisted of a front of house manager / bartender, a "bookkeeper", and a couple of grunts like me. I have never been that serious about food, it has simply always been just a job to me. I'm real good at it, but that's just because I've the experience and idk I just have a knack for it. My initial goal with helping my bro and his friends start a restaurant was just that, I just wanted to help my brother accomplish his dream. Maybe I would have continued my education throughout and who knows, maybe graduate and get a good non back breaking job before I hit my 30's. Long story short, none of us knew what it meant to actually own a restaurant or a business at all. We learned real quick that it was never ending hard work, at least in the beginning. The first to go was the "bookkeeper".
I have "bookkeeper" in quotations because she was not a bookkeeper we were all just too naive to understand this. About a year into the operation she was fried and ran off to Mexico to travel with her bf. Great for her, but that left us with no idea what to do about that end of the business. We didn't really have the money to hire an in house bookkeeper, so I just did what anybody who has no idea what to do would. A bunch of youtube videos later I was running payroll for about 20 to 30 employees on QBO, filing and submitting sales tax, unemployment tax, and workers comp through state websites. The business is located near a state border so I was becoming familiar with both state's tax liabilities as we had employees in both states. I started to work with an accounting consultant who taught me to categorize expenses in quickbooks, and helped me get literally the first year of expenses reconciled. This is the reason for "bookkeeper". Our partner had gone the first full year of business without categorizing a single expense in QB's, we did not even have books, we could not get our taxes filed and it was just a huge mess. But, with the help of a consultant I cleaned it up the best I possibly could. Some issues were impossible to correct because there was almost no record keeping and she had a habit of spending cash. I don't want to drag this on, the point is that I have been for the last 2 years now taking care of most of the business admin type work. Almost a year ago, we hired this guy, he has been a utility man, but he has a good amount of experience in the corporate world and has actually helped me with creating budgets and keeping track of expenses, he also helps my brother with social media and a host of other things. He now does a lot of our inventory and ordering, he does part of the schedule, he really believes in my brother's vision and is basically becoming the GM, just not quite officially yet.
(Again sorry for the read.)
As I have mentioned I am not passionate about food or drinks or restaurants at all. I want a 9 to 5er with PTO, benefits, a WLB, and a decent compensation. I see this guy as an opportunity to get out. I'm in the process of outsourcing payroll, and having an accounting firm take over most of the reconciliation. The dude is more than capable of helping my brother run his restaurant. So all is good there. I on the other hand am burned out. I'm about 2.5 years from an accounting degree, and want to continue pursuing that. As I make my escape, I realize that I'm going to have to work somewhere. I really really really don't want to work in another kitchen. I've been looking on indeed and have noticed entry level accounting work, AP, data entry, stuff like that. Usually for a small local company, sometimes the few of the small cities around me are putting up ads looking to fill these types of positions. The jobs pay anywhere from $18 to like $24 an hour which I wouldn't mind, they always say they prefer someone with at least an associates but a diploma works. By now I am very comfortable using QB's and Excel, and I am thoroughly interested in the field and am intrigued by entrepreneurship and business in general. I have experience with running a business, but don't really want to continue what I'm doing (for multiple reasons). Anyway, should I list out the decade or so of unrelated work experience while creating a resume for a job like this? My thought is that I should have the jobs listed, but just not go too far into the description, and focus mostly on my "accounting" experience at my brother's restaurant. Also would you guys think that even with my experience that I am likely to be hired as an entry level bookkeeper or data entry clerk? I know accounting can be very complex, but I'm not going for a position like that, just simple invoicing/ record keeping data entry type work. Personally, I think I'd be well suited for a gig like that.
Please let mw know your thoughts.
Also if any of you started in hospitality, I'd love you hear your story.
Thanks reddit accounting community!

I'm not all that mad about it, but someone commented on my newest fanfiction saying "ok, i know it may be a little selfish request, and im sorry for that, but i really enjoyed your stories about [Character], If you have time can you please do another one?" The thing that gets me though is that the story they commented on was for an entirely different fandom than the character they were requesting.
I assume they didn't even read the story they commented on, which is what urks me the most. Why not comment on the actual stories that were mentioned? I would have like zero issues with the comment if it was on the correct story, but I hate irrelevant messages. Worse yet, I'd like to reply to it to explain why I stopped writing for the fandom in question (aka I ran out of ideas), and they'd likely reply back. That'd be a comment chain of at least 2 but likely more that's completely unrelated to the story it's under. Plus, the fic in question isn't doing the best with engagement (wish it was doing better but I'm not really complaining) and only has two comments so far. If a conversation gets going, that poor fic is going to have over half the comments be about something utterly unrelated and I hate that. But I don't want to ignore the comment either.
Why couldn't they have just commented on a relevant ficcccccc T-T

DRAG RACE!
Rachelle Mirage struts the runway wearing a pantsuit in orange and red.
“Hello world!”
“Welcome to Drag Race.”
Rachelle smiles.
“Ms Michaels, how you doing?”
“I’m fabulous baby.” Floss grins. “How YOU doing?”
“Amazing. Let’s kick out Chronologica!” Rachelle cackles.
Floss winks.
“Tanvi Lioness, are you ready to see these comedians shine?”
“It’s time for them to exit the house.” Tanvi smirks.
“For our Challenge, our racers were tasked with competing in the BIG MOTHER improv challenge!”
“And on the runway, they’ll be wearing Red Velvet looks.”
“It’s TIME!”
~
“Category is… Red Velvet!”
Crayola Boxx struts out in a red ball gown, uttering the shape of a cake. She’s got a big, swirly skirt, and she spins around and around, with little bits of ‘frosting’ spurting out of the stage. She’s got a big red updo and a smile on her face.
“Not the spurting.” Floss looks around awkwardly.
“It reminds me of what you used to-” Rachelle stops after looking at Floss’ rageful face.
Aguacate struts out in a full ball gown, with multiple layers of luscious red velvet cake. She twirls down the runway, revealing a big slice has been taken right out of her backside, exposing the real cake, which is completely bare. Aguacate takes a lick of her delicious frosting, and licks her fingers clean!
“Oh… Aguacate did it so much better than Crayola.” Tanvi whispers to Rachelle.
Wearing a surprisingly high-fashion number, Jaslene Bangus walks down the runway. Her hair is dark and slicked back into a high pony. The outfit itself, however, is a two-piece suit made entirely out of red velvet. The collar and front of the suit jacket is made to resemble the red curtains of a theater. As she walks, her face showcases class and poise.
“Thank God it’s not another cake look.” Rachelle says.
Zazu Nova arrives in a Lightning Mcqueen inspired form-fitting red velvet catsuit, hugging the her curves, with black accents in the form of lightning bolts paying homage to Lightning McQueen's design, and red velvet jacket with racing patches adding an edgy and rebellious vibe to the look as she struts with a smile.
“Vroom Vroom.” Floss smiles.
Granny Gorgeous enters the stage in a red velvet cape, a huge one that covers her entire body and makes her frame not so visible. With a long red wig, Granny is serving caftan velvet realness with a smirk.
“Oh, she’s giving Granny.” Tanvi smirks.
Fiore Stravaganza shines in a sleek velvet dress that hugs her body tight. She’s got a massive red headdress, made of the same red velvet material, replacing a wig like Fiore would normally rock. Her face is expressively painted, and Fiore looks like a star.
“Gorgeous.” Rachelle smiles.
Yasmin Raiz oozes sex appeal, strutting the runway in a deep red velvet bodycon dress that hangs low off her shoulders, with a little cream flower pin on her bosom. She wears sheer cream nylon gloves with a small ruffled bow at the wrist, a perfectly coiffed cream-blonde wig, small deep red glasses with flower-shaped frames, and carries a cream fur coat, as if she doesn’t even need the reveal.
“Delicious.” Floss winks.
King Omari Star stuns as he enters the stage in a red velvet kilt, with an asymmetrical shirt that has a matching long, flowy cape along with it. He’s got a massive pair of red platform boots, and as he walks, he gives every inch of royalty with a smirk.
“He loves a cape.” Rachelle chuckles.
~
“Hi Racers.” Rachelle purses her lips. “Nobody is safe.”
“First up… Yasmin.”
Yasmin smiles.
“You really have a soulful vibe, and I enjoy it.” Tanvi nods. “You hit the marks comedically, you enjoyed yourself and I was really quite pleased to see it.”
“Thank you!” Yasmin grins.
“It was a real fun time, and I do think you really were one of the highlights to see. Solid work, girl.” Rachelle smiles, “You have been consistent these past couple of weeks, and you only leave me wanting a little bit more, and I must say that I do think this look is a good switch for you. Keep up the good work.”
Yasmin bows.
“Fiore.”
Fiore smiles.
“You look gorgeous.” Racehelle grins. “Like, wow.”
Fiore flicks back her invisible hair and smirks.
“In this challenge, I did wish I got to see MORE from you in the challenge, though. It feels as if something is keeping you from fully going out like you did in, let’s say, the Snatch Game..”
Fiore nods.
“Just need- more engagement. I feel as if you’re hardening up, going back into that inner shell, when I want you to let us see even more of you. Pretty will only get you so far, Fiore.”
“I can assure you, this is me.” Fiore looks at Rachelle.
“Well…” Rachelle nods.
“Moving on, Jaslene.”
Jaslene looks at the judges.
“YAS! Girl, this look is great.” Floss smiles. “I damn love it.”
“Thank you.” Jaslene nods.
“I feel you have been middle of the road for a few weeks. But this week, I saw the effort baby. But it is not quite enough. I’m going to need you to keep driving- because at this point, I feel as if you’re lagging behind.”
“Noted.” Jaslene says.
“Zazu.”
“Hii…” Zazu says awkwardly.
“I think we know.” Rachelle says.
“Yes.” Zazu responds.
“This wasn’t quite the best performance. Well, you stumbled. I wanted to see you do well, but unfortunately- it wasn’t quite enough, and I’m going to need you to fight for this.”
“I do want to do this.” Zazu purses her lips. “For me, I feel challenged here. But I will always take every single critique and fight for the crown.”
“That is what I need.” Rachelle looks at Zazu. “Keep it going.”
Zazu nods in agreement.
“Omari.”
Omari adjusts his cape.
“You have a royal presence to you.” Tanvi says.
“King Omari Star.” Omari smirks. “Is my full name.”
“I can see it.” Tanvi responds. “I think you had a good balance of funny and real. I enjoyed you this week.”
Omari smiles.
“I wanted you to push yourself out of your comfort zone this week, and you did. And for that I have to commend you” Rachelle responds. “Well done.”
“Thank you.” Omari grins.
Granny.
“Hello.” Granny says.
“I am loving this look.” Rachelle looks at Granny. “It’s giving- a bit generic, but also- I do feel like you’re reinforcing that idea said a few weeks ago- I am seeing a lack of brand.”
“Okay…” Granny smiles, ever the pleaser.
“I want you to get dirty this week, but you did not.” Rachelle says. “And I'm going to need you to further think on what your drag is- what you bring. Because again- at this point, that’s really important.”
“I understand.” Granny smiles.
“Aguacate.”
“¡Hola!” Aguacate winks.
“You’re pure chaos!”
“AHHHHH!” Aguacate screams.
Tanvi giggles.
“That is what I liked.” Tanvi says. “Well and truly, you stole the show.”
“Thank you.” Aguacate smirks.
“I feel like unlike others, you do know who you are. My advice? Keep doing you.”
“I will.” Aguacate adds. “I can tell you that.”
“Finally, Crayola.”
“Hello dear.” Crayola smiles.
“You weren’t funny, baby.” Floss frowns.
“Oh.” Crayola looks surprised.
“As in- you know, I was expecting haha. But I got- oh, nah.” Floss laughs. “Like, damn, there was nothing fun- and I wanted to see you make me laugh!”
Crayola nods.
“For me, it came off- just like you were trying too hard, it wasn’t the smooth sailing we were looking for. And it just wasn't a very clever delivery, or very funny either. It was a shame.” Rachelle adds. “…And this gown doesn’t do you any favors- it looks frumpy.”
“I apologize.” Crayola responds.
“Racers, before we deliberate… I have a question to ask.”
Everyone looks at each other.
“Who should go home tonight and why? Starting with… Crayola.”
“I think this week I disappointed.” Crayola frowns. “And I do really enjoy this, but I am not delivering, and I will be truthful with that. I wasn’t the best, and I’m sorry.” Crayola says.
The others look surprised.
“Okay.”
“Zazu.” Aguacate says. “Ms Boxx at least has two wins. This is what, her… 4th time in the bottom 3?” Aguacate laughs.
Zazu frowns.
“I do agree, Zazu.” Granny sighs. “Sadly, at this point, she is not delivering as consistently as the others.”
“For me, Crayola.” Omari says. “I see a fighter in Zazu. I do not see that in Crayola, as… clearly, neither does she.”
Aguacate giggles.
“I think, Crayola.” Zazu nods. “I’m sorry, but I will not say myself- I can never...”
Rachelle nods.
“For me, Crayola.” Jaslene responds. “At this point, she is not showcasing herself at her best.”
“Now, Zazu is clearly at the bottom.” Fiore purses her lips. “But if I’m being honest, at this point, Jaslene isn’t delivering anything new either, I don’t think.” Fiore nods. “Like you have said she has been, for a lack of a better term… flat-lining these past several episodes.”
Jaslene looks surprised, as well as Rachelle.
Jaslene Bangus: “What the fuck?”
“Let her fight for the bottom.” Fiore shrugs.
Jaslene rolls her eyes.
“I do agree with Zazu.” Yasmin nods. “Unfortunately.”
“Thank you, racers. Whilst we deliberate, you may untuck backstage in the Crystal Lounge, sponsored by Princess Papaya Tropical Drinks.”
~
The racers enter the platinum lounge.
Jaslene stomps in, grabbing a drink before turning to face Fiore.
“What the fuck?” Jaslene says.
Fiore raises an eyebrow. "What's the matter, Jaslene? Did I say something wrong?"
Jaslene clenches her fists, clearly pissed. "You think it's okay to throw me under the bus like that? Saying I should fight for the bottom? What the hell girl? I thought you were my sister?”
Fiore smirks, taking a sip of her drink. “Please, Jaslene. I was just stating m ytruth, what I have been seeing these past few weeks- If you can't handle a little critique, maybe you're not cut out for this competition. I feel as if you haven’t been delivering, and to me, you’re dead weight, right now."
Fiore Stravaganza: “Real talk, I said her name because simply put, at this point, I feel the AE girls have been holding me back. I need my brand focused on me.”
Jaslene's trembles. "You have no right to judge me, Fiore. You act like you're better than all of us, but you're just a mean-spirited queen hiding behind a pretty face."
“Darling, you came up with the name PRETTY GIRLS, I’m not just pretty, I’m gorgeous.” Fiore growls. “I was just being honest.”
“Honest?!” Jaselene rolls her eyes. “You’re acting nasty.”
Fiore's eyes narrow, her composure slipping for a moment. "Watch your words, Jaslene. I may be straightforward, but at least I'm not deluding myself like some queens here. I speak the truth, and if you can't handle it, that's your problem. Now go fix your hair."
Jaslene looks as if she is ready to scream, as Omari raises his hand in between them. “Let’s not.”
“I just..” Jaslene rolls her eyes. “Whatever.” Jaslene walks off.
“Beef.” Aguacate giggles.
“...Can I ask, what is going on Fiore?” Omari asks. “Like, there’s this switch..”
“There’s no switch.” Fiore responds quickly, looking at Omari. “I’ve always been competitive here, and clearly you haven’t been paying attention.”
Omari rolls his eyes. “Alright.”
“How is everyone else?” Granny asks.
“I am disappointed to be in the bottom again, but girl- I love to perform.” Zazu puts in an earphone. “So, I'm going to give my all.”
Zazu Nova: “A stage is where I shine. That- I am not scared of.” Zazu grins.
“For me, it’s-” Crayola sighs.
Crayola pauses, and looks down. "I don't know, guys. I'm just... I'm really struggling right now. I feel like I'm not good enough, like I don't belong here. And seeing myself disappoint week after week, it's really taking a toll on me."
“You won last week, girl.” Fiore adds.
Yasmin puts a hand on Crayola’s shoulder. "Hey, hey, none of that talk, okay? You are talented, Crayola, and you absolutely belong here. We all have our off weeks, but that doesn't define who we are as queens. You have so much more to offer, and I believe in you."
“I just wish you didn’t say your own name.” Omari says.
King Omari Star: “I would never say my own name. I will always fight. And Crayola… it is a strange response.”
Crayola looks up at Yasmin, tearing up. "Thank you, Yasmin. I'm just scared of going home, you know? I don't want to let myself down or let anyone else down."
Yasmin pulls Crayola into a warm hug. "I understand that fear, but remember, this is just a moment in our journey. It doesn't define our worth or our future. We've come so far, and we're all here to support each other. You are loved and valued, Crayola."
Granny smiles. “We're a family here, and we lift each other up. Don't let negative thoughts bring you down. Embrace your uniqueness and shine."
Granny Gorgeous: “I feel the same, though. This is… scary.”
Aguacate chimes in with a grin. "Exactly, mija! We all have our strengths and weaknesses, but together, we make this competition fierce. Keep your head high and remember why you're here."
“Vroom vroom.” Zazu winks.
Jaslene looks in the mirror, combing her hair before sitting next to Omari.
Jaslene Bangus: “Well, I guess that’s over.”
Fiore and Jaslene look at each other for a second.
Jaslene Bangus: “Full steam ahead.”
~
“Welcome back, racers. We’ve made some decisions.”
…
“Fiore, Jaslene, you’re safe.”
The two look at each other before walking separate sides of the stage.
“Omari. Yasmin. Great work. You’re safe.”
The two grin.
“Aguacate, this week you made us CACKLE. Condragulations, you are the winner of this week’s challenge.”
Aguacate jumps for joy. “WOOHOO”
Aguacate: “Another one.” Aguacate winks. “I I think I’m a frontrunner.”
…
…
“Granny, you’re safe.”
Granny bows.
“That means Zazu Nova and Crayola Boxx, I’m sorry my dears, but you are up for elimination.”
“The time has come… for you to lip sync to your life!”
**Conga by Gloria Estefan starts to play**
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54ItEmCnP80
“Good luck… and don’t fuck it up!”
Zazu Nova: “I know this is my fourth time, but lip syncing is what I do. I’m never going down without a FIGHT!”
Crayola Boxx: “I’m giving my heart. That’s all I can do.”
~
Next Time!
Racers, it’s time to makeover your loved ones!
“My WIFE!” Omari yells, tearing up.
“Woah.” Aguacate stares awkwardly.
“I’m going to shit on these bitches.” Jaslene smirks.
“Oh, another bodysuit?” Fiore looks at Jaslene.
Fiore Stravaganza: “This is MY moment.”
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet

DRAG RACE!
Rachelle Mirage struts the runway wearing a pantsuit in orange and red.
“Hello world!”
“Welcome to Drag Race.”
Rachelle smiles.
“Ms Michaels, how you doing?”
“I’m fabulous baby.” Floss grins. “How YOU doing?”
“Amazing. Let’s kick out Chronologica!” Rachelle cackles.
Floss winks.
“Tanvi Lioness, are you ready to see these comedians shine?”
“It’s time for them to exit the house.” Tanvi smirks.
“For our Challenge, our racers were tasked with competing in the BIG MOTHER improv challenge!”
“And on the runway, they’ll be wearing Red Velvet looks.”
“It’s TIME!”
~
“Category is… Red Velvet!”
Crayola Boxx struts out in a red ball gown, uttering the shape of a cake. She’s got a big, swirly skirt, and she spins around and around, with little bits of ‘frosting’ spurting out of the stage. She’s got a big red updo and a smile on her face.
“Not the spurting.” Floss looks around awkwardly.
“It reminds me of what you used to-” Rachelle stops after looking at Floss’ rageful face.
Aguacate struts out in a full ball gown, with multiple layers of luscious red velvet cake. She twirls down the runway, revealing a big slice has been taken right out of her backside, exposing the real cake, which is completely bare. Aguacate takes a lick of her delicious frosting, and licks her fingers clean!
“Oh… Aguacate did it so much better than Crayola.” Tanvi whispers to Rachelle.
Wearing a surprisingly high-fashion number, Jaslene Bangus walks down the runway. Her hair is dark and slicked back into a high pony. The outfit itself, however, is a two-piece suit made entirely out of red velvet. The collar and front of the suit jacket is made to resemble the red curtains of a theater. As she walks, her face showcases class and poise.
“Thank God it’s not another cake look.” Rachelle says.
Zazu Nova arrives in a Lightning Mcqueen inspired form-fitting red velvet catsuit, hugging the her curves, with black accents in the form of lightning bolts paying homage to Lightning McQueen's design, and red velvet jacket with racing patches adding an edgy and rebellious vibe to the look as she struts with a smile.
“Vroom Vroom.” Floss smiles.
Granny Gorgeous enters the stage in a red velvet cape, a huge one that covers her entire body and makes her frame not so visible. With a long red wig, Granny is serving caftan velvet realness with a smirk.
“Oh, she’s giving Granny.” Tanvi smirks.
Fiore Stravaganza shines in a sleek velvet dress that hugs her body tight. She’s got a massive red headdress, made of the same red velvet material, replacing a wig like Fiore would normally rock. Her face is expressively painted, and Fiore looks like a star.
“Gorgeous.” Rachelle smiles.
Yasmin Raiz oozes sex appeal, strutting the runway in a deep red velvet bodycon dress that hangs low off her shoulders, with a little cream flower pin on her bosom. She wears sheer cream nylon gloves with a small ruffled bow at the wrist, a perfectly coiffed cream-blonde wig, small deep red glasses with flower-shaped frames, and carries a cream fur coat, as if she doesn’t even need the reveal.
“Delicious.” Floss winks.
King Omari Star stuns as he enters the stage in a red velvet kilt, with an asymmetrical shirt that has a matching long, flowy cape along with it. He’s got a massive pair of red platform boots, and as he walks, he gives every inch of royalty with a smirk.
“He loves a cape.” Rachelle chuckles.
~
“Hi Racers.” Rachelle purses her lips. “Nobody is safe.”
“First up… Yasmin.”
Yasmin smiles.
“You really have a soulful vibe, and I enjoy it.” Tanvi nods. “You hit the marks comedically, you enjoyed yourself and I was really quite pleased to see it.”
“Thank you!” Yasmin grins.
“It was a real fun time, and I do think you really were one of the highlights to see. Solid work, girl.” Rachelle smiles, “You have been consistent these past couple of weeks, and you only leave me wanting a little bit more, and I must say that I do think this look is a good switch for you. Keep up the good work.”
Yasmin bows.
“Fiore.”
Fiore smiles.
“You look gorgeous.” Racehelle grins. “Like, wow.”
Fiore flicks back her invisible hair and smirks.
“In this challenge, I did wish I got to see MORE from you in the challenge, though. It feels as if something is keeping you from fully going out like you did in, let’s say, the Snatch Game..”
Fiore nods.
“Just need- more engagement. I feel as if you’re hardening up, going back into that inner shell, when I want you to let us see even more of you. Pretty will only get you so far, Fiore.”
“I can assure you, this is me.” Fiore looks at Rachelle.
“Well…” Rachelle nods.
“Moving on, Jaslene.”
Jaslene looks at the judges.
“YAS! Girl, this look is great.” Floss smiles. “I damn love it.”
“Thank you.” Jaslene nods.
“I feel you have been middle of the road for a few weeks. But this week, I saw the effort baby. But it is not quite enough. I’m going to need you to keep driving- because at this point, I feel as if you’re lagging behind.”
“Noted.” Jaslene says.
“Zazu.”
“Hii…” Zazu says awkwardly.
“I think we know.” Rachelle says.
“Yes.” Zazu responds.
“This wasn’t quite the best performance. Well, you stumbled. I wanted to see you do well, but unfortunately- it wasn’t quite enough, and I’m going to need you to fight for this.”
“I do want to do this.” Zazu purses her lips. “For me, I feel challenged here. But I will always take every single critique and fight for the crown.”
“That is what I need.” Rachelle looks at Zazu. “Keep it going.”
Zazu nods in agreement.
“Omari.”
Omari adjusts his cape.
“You have a royal presence to you.” Tanvi says.
“King Omari Star.” Omari smirks. “Is my full name.”
“I can see it.” Tanvi responds. “I think you had a good balance of funny and real. I enjoyed you this week.”
Omari smiles.
“I wanted you to push yourself out of your comfort zone this week, and you did. And for that I have to commend you” Rachelle responds. “Well done.”
“Thank you.” Omari grins.
Granny.
“Hello.” Granny says.
“I am loving this look.” Rachelle looks at Granny. “It’s giving- a bit generic, but also- I do feel like you’re reinforcing that idea said a few weeks ago- I am seeing a lack of brand.”
“Okay…” Granny smiles, ever the pleaser.
“I want you to get dirty this week, but you did not.” Rachelle says. “And I'm going to need you to further think on what your drag is- what you bring. Because again- at this point, that’s really important.”
“I understand.” Granny smiles.
“Aguacate.”
“¡Hola!” Aguacate winks.
“You’re pure chaos!”
“AHHHHH!” Aguacate screams.
Tanvi giggles.
“That is what I liked.” Tanvi says. “Well and truly, you stole the show.”
“Thank you.” Aguacate smirks.
“I feel like unlike others, you do know who you are. My advice? Keep doing you.”
“I will.” Aguacate adds. “I can tell you that.”
“Finally, Crayola.”
“Hello dear.” Crayola smiles.
“You weren’t funny, baby.” Floss frowns.
“Oh.” Crayola looks surprised.
“As in- you know, I was expecting haha. But I got- oh, nah.” Floss laughs. “Like, damn, there was nothing fun- and I wanted to see you make me laugh!”
Crayola nods.
“For me, it came off- just like you were trying too hard, it wasn’t the smooth sailing we were looking for. And it just wasn't a very clever delivery, or very funny either. It was a shame.” Rachelle adds. “…And this gown doesn’t do you any favors- it looks frumpy.”
“I apologize.” Crayola responds.
“Racers, before we deliberate… I have a question to ask.”
Everyone looks at each other.
“Who should go home tonight and why? Starting with… Crayola.”
“I think this week I disappointed.” Crayola frowns. “And I do really enjoy this, but I am not delivering, and I will be truthful with that. I wasn’t the best, and I’m sorry.” Crayola says.
The others look surprised.
“Okay.”
“Zazu.” Aguacate says. “Ms Boxx at least has two wins. This is what, her… 4th time in the bottom 3?” Aguacate laughs.
Zazu frowns.
“I do agree, Zazu.” Granny sighs. “Sadly, at this point, she is not delivering as consistently as the others.”
“For me, Crayola.” Omari says. “I see a fighter in Zazu. I do not see that in Crayola, as… clearly, neither does she.”
Aguacate giggles.
“I think, Crayola.” Zazu nods. “I’m sorry, but I will not say myself- I can never...”
Rachelle nods.
“For me, Crayola.” Jaslene responds. “At this point, she is not showcasing herself at her best.”
“Now, Zazu is clearly at the bottom.” Fiore purses her lips. “But if I’m being honest, at this point, Jaslene isn’t delivering anything new either, I don’t think.” Fiore nods. “Like you have said she has been, for a lack of a better term… flat-lining these past several episodes.”
Jaslene looks surprised, as well as Rachelle.
Jaslene Bangus: “What the fuck?”
“Let her fight for the bottom.” Fiore shrugs.
Jaslene rolls her eyes.
“I do agree with Zazu.” Yasmin nods. “Unfortunately.”
“Thank you, racers. Whilst we deliberate, you may untuck backstage in the Crystal Lounge, sponsored by Princess Papaya Tropical Drinks.”
~
The racers enter the platinum lounge.
Jaslene stomps in, grabbing a drink before turning to face Fiore.
“What the fuck?” Jaslene says.
Fiore raises an eyebrow. "What's the matter, Jaslene? Did I say something wrong?"
Jaslene clenches her fists, clearly pissed. "You think it's okay to throw me under the bus like that? Saying I should fight for the bottom? What the hell girl? I thought you were my sister?”
Fiore smirks, taking a sip of her drink. “Please, Jaslene. I was just stating m ytruth, what I have been seeing these past few weeks- If you can't handle a little critique, maybe you're not cut out for this competition. I feel as if you haven’t been delivering, and to me, you’re dead weight, right now."
Fiore Stravaganza: “Real talk, I said her name because simply put, at this point, I feel the AE girls have been holding me back. I need my brand focused on me.”
Jaslene's trembles. "You have no right to judge me, Fiore. You act like you're better than all of us, but you're just a mean-spirited queen hiding behind a pretty face."
“Darling, you came up with the name PRETTY GIRLS, I’m not just pretty, I’m gorgeous.” Fiore growls. “I was just being honest.”
“Honest?!” Jaselene rolls her eyes. “You’re acting nasty.”
Fiore's eyes narrow, her composure slipping for a moment. "Watch your words, Jaslene. I may be straightforward, but at least I'm not deluding myself like some queens here. I speak the truth, and if you can't handle it, that's your problem. Now go fix your hair."
Jaslene looks as if she is ready to scream, as Omari raises his hand in between them. “Let’s not.”
“I just..” Jaslene rolls her eyes. “Whatever.” Jaslene walks off.
“Beef.” Aguacate giggles.
“...Can I ask, what is going on Fiore?” Omari asks. “Like, there’s this switch..”
“There’s no switch.” Fiore responds quickly, looking at Omari. “I’ve always been competitive here, and clearly you haven’t been paying attention.”
Omari rolls his eyes. “Alright.”
“How is everyone else?” Granny asks.
“I am disappointed to be in the bottom again, but girl- I love to perform.” Zazu puts in an earphone. “So, I'm going to give my all.”
Zazu Nova: “A stage is where I shine. That- I am not scared of.” Zazu grins.
“For me, it’s-” Crayola sighs.
Crayola pauses, and looks down. "I don't know, guys. I'm just... I'm really struggling right now. I feel like I'm not good enough, like I don't belong here. And seeing myself disappoint week after week, it's really taking a toll on me."
“You won last week, girl.” Fiore adds.
Yasmin puts a hand on Crayola’s shoulder. "Hey, hey, none of that talk, okay? You are talented, Crayola, and you absolutely belong here. We all have our off weeks, but that doesn't define who we are as queens. You have so much more to offer, and I believe in you."
“I just wish you didn’t say your own name.” Omari says.
King Omari Star: “I would never say my own name. I will always fight. And Crayola… it is a strange response.”
Crayola looks up at Yasmin, tearing up. "Thank you, Yasmin. I'm just scared of going home, you know? I don't want to let myself down or let anyone else down."
Yasmin pulls Crayola into a warm hug. "I understand that fear, but remember, this is just a moment in our journey. It doesn't define our worth or our future. We've come so far, and we're all here to support each other. You are loved and valued, Crayola."
Granny smiles. “We're a family here, and we lift each other up. Don't let negative thoughts bring you down. Embrace your uniqueness and shine."
Granny Gorgeous: “I feel the same, though. This is… scary.”
Aguacate chimes in with a grin. "Exactly, mija! We all have our strengths and weaknesses, but together, we make this competition fierce. Keep your head high and remember why you're here."
“Vroom vroom.” Zazu winks.
Jaslene looks in the mirror, combing her hair before sitting next to Omari.
Jaslene Bangus: “Well, I guess that’s over.”
Fiore and Jaslene look at each other for a second.
Jaslene Bangus: “Full steam ahead.”
~
“Welcome back, racers. We’ve made some decisions.”
…
“Fiore, Jaslene, you’re safe.”
The two look at each other before walking separate sides of the stage.
“Omari. Yasmin. Great work. You’re safe.”
The two grin.
“Aguacate, this week you made us CACKLE. Condragulations, you are the winner of this week’s challenge.”
Aguacate jumps for joy. “WOOHOO”
Aguacate: “Another one.” Aguacate winks. “I I think I’m a frontrunner.”
…
…
“Granny, you’re safe.”
Granny bows.
“That means Zazu Nova and Crayola Boxx, I’m sorry my dears, but you are up for elimination.”
“The time has come… for you to lip sync to your life!”
**Conga by Gloria Estefan starts to play**
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54ItEmCnP80
“Good luck… and don’t fuck it up!”
Zazu Nova: “I know this is my fourth time, but lip syncing is what I do. I’m never going down without a FIGHT!”
Crayola Boxx: “I’m giving my heart. That’s all I can do.”
~
Next Time!
Racers, it’s time to makeover your loved ones!
“My WIFE!” Omari yells, tearing up.
“Woah.” Aguacate stares awkwardly.
“I’m going to shit on these bitches.” Jaslene smirks.
“Oh, another bodysuit?” Fiore looks at Jaslene.
Fiore Stravaganza: “This is MY moment.”
~
Stats
Voting
Spreadsheet

Heads up, this is gonna be a longer post- I debated about showing this for a while, but after some recent life events I figured it was time to talk about it. No jokes today, this is straight from the heart.
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If you told me three years ago I would be involved with VTubers, collecting merch and cheering about her little everyday things and interactions, I would have never believed you. At the time I was a completely different person; I rocked the emo look, I was wrapping my college life and even throughout COVID I still had plans for going to med school and overcoming those unique challenges. I had the same views on anime and the whole culture that the majority of people (or at least the US) has, never taking this seriously. But then again, there were also a lot of things going on with me at the time that I don't miss.
For starters, the pandemic really threw me for a loop. I had always planned on going straight to med school after college, and had a set plan for getting all my requirements and classes done over time to get into a really good med school. Unfortunately, things didn't work out that way; Lots of research opportunities and classes I needed to take suddenly dissolved before my eyes, setting me back a few years as I had to work harder to get the same result. I graduated college just fine, but the fact that my dream was in jeopardy shook me. I still tried applying and getting into good schools, but got turned down at every point because they didn't yet make exceptions for the pandemic. It launched me into a depression, and for about 2 years after graduation I was more or less a NEET living at home barely able to function. I kept trying for different schools and working odd jobs, but constant rejections and nothing sticking for good only worsened my situation.
I was well into the weeds when I found Hololive, which wasn't the cure-all (like anyone would think that) but it was entertaining to say the least. This community isn't perfect, but I've met a ton of nice, funny and incredible people all over due to VTubers, so while it didn't help my situation, it made things more bearable.
Then along came Council- naturally I was excited, the EN members/speakers were my favorites. I liked all the new Gen 2 members, but Kronii hit different right from her debut stream. From the superficial points like her design, her voice, persona and talent- down to her more innate and special attributes like her humor, empathy and relatability. She instantly became my favorite, and I wanted to do more with her content and unique streams. I had no art skills, no limitless pools of cash for SCs, no real talent to make my mark- but I did like making shitposts, and when I remembered the popularity and fun people had here on Reddit, I thought to myself, "That's perfect- I'll go ahead and do that!"
To this day, I don't think of Kronii as a truly perfect person. She's got her flaws, but we all do; What's important was that she (or at least her persona) is what I aspired to be: confident, ambitious, funny, intelligent, in short what I dreamed of being like all throughout college and in the future. As the days turned to weeks turned to months, I've kept up the meme posts both because they cheered me up and because I wanted to keep supporting her. Throughout it all though, I think it was also what I needed to 'wake up' and shake me out of my stupor. Lying in bed all day sad about what could have been had got me nowhere, and it wasn't showing any signs of changing. But if I acted more like Kronii, being optimistic and working my hardest towards making the best of things, maybe things would change.
To my surprise- they did! My family said I looked and acted happier, I went out more and made some IRL friends, held a job for more than a few months and actively found/worked towards getting the medical requirements needed for school. Just three months ago I got accepted into med school- the studying and workload has been crushing, but I would rather go through ten years of it than back trapped in my own head. It's a surreal experience, one that I would not have believed had I not seen the results first hand, but here I am.
I want to end this on a serious note though: Kronii herself did not help me get to this point. I don't think a random person on the internet was the answer to all my problems, nor would I dump all of this onto her over several SCs as if she saved my life. This achievement and path of self-realization was my own doing, my own hard work and the persistence not to give up when times were tough. But Kronii did help show me the startline- not directly, not on purpose, but just a case of right place and right time. Without seeing the kind of person that she is and the kind of person I knew I wanted to be, who knows how long I would have been stuck in my depressive state or if I would achieve my dream.
So Thank You Kronii. You appeared at the right time in my life, showed me the possibility of what I could be when I couldn't see it myself, and I am proud to say I am thriving. It's my own hard work and patience that got me here, but throughout it all you've been a source of inspiration and laughs that made me happy. I'm going to keep working hard, not because I want to make you happy but to achieve self-fullfillment as a person.
...ok, small joke. TL;DR- "Just don't be sad." but it worked.

I (32F) met a guy (30M) on a dating app over a week ago. We exchanged a couple messages before he asked for my number and I gave it to him the same day we matched. We were texting a little within the next day. Then he asked me when he can take me out on a date. We agreed to meet that night (the day after we matched) for some drinks. He said he was really nervous to meet me, but I tried to make him feel more comfortable.
I drove to his city and we met at one of his favorite bars. He introduced me to his friends/bartenders. I feel like we got along well. We both equally contributed to the conversation and had some good laughs. He kept saying how when football season came back, he’d like to go to the games and invited me. He including me in lots of future plans he had for himself. Then he mentioned the best steak he’s had at a steakhouse nearby and asked if I had been there before. I said no and he asked if I wanted to go there at that moment. I said absolutely because it sounds fun. I offered to pay for my tab at the bar, but he covered it and I thanked him.
He took an Uber to the bar since he lives close by. So he said we can take an Uber to the restaurant or take my car. I said we can take my car. I drove us super close by to the restaurant. We continued the great conversation and he said he’s never brought another woman to this restaurant before. He also told me he had never been on a date with a woman as attractive as me and he complimented me on my looks many times during the date. We also flirted heavily throughout the night and got a little tipsy.
Once we got done at the restaurant, again I offered to pay, and he said no and covered it. I thanked him again. He then asked if I’d like to over to his place and I agreed. We slept together and he asked me to stay the night, so I did. Everything was great. I went home the next morning. He texted me later that day and told me he wanted to cuddle me all day. I told him I could go over and we could cuddle, but he said he had plans with friends that night. I said no worries and told him to have fun. We continued texting for a bit the day after the date and he said he wanted to see me again and I said I’d love that.
Over the next few days, he didn’t really text me. I would reach out to him and he’d either give me a quick call or we’d exchange a couple of messages and that’s it. I can tell he’s not a big texter, which is fine. The one time he did call me, he was in the car with one of his friends. I was on speaker phone and he introduced me to his friend. It was a nice, but short conversation.
I have been waiting for him to ask me out on a second date or ask to see me and hang out again, but he still hasn’t. I’ve hinted to him a couple times that I want to see him again by telling him “I miss you” or “I can’t wait to get all dressed up for you again.” I’ve even straight up asked him one night if he’d like to have dinner and hang out, but he said he had plans with friends that night.
I’m getting the hint that he’s just not interested or he’s dating other people, which is totally fine. I just don’t understand what he wants from me. He won’t text me or call me or ask me for a second date or to hang out, but he’ll comment on every selfie I post on both Instagram and snapchat. Every single one. He tells me I’m beautiful and cute. He says he misses me. He also calls me babe. Just the other night, I posted a selfie before going to the gym on my Instagram story and he replied “my babe.” I’m confused. Is he interested in me? Is he not? If he’s not interested, why is he still flirting with me on social media only and telling me he misses me? If he is interested, why isn’t he texting me here and there or asking me out again? Should I ask him again? I just don’t want to be too persistent and push him away because I feel like we had a good connection. Should I just leave it alone and let him make a move if he’s even still interested?
TL;DR: A guy I went on a great date with isn’t texting/calling me or making a move to see me again, but still constantly flirts with me on social media. Why? Advice is appreciated.

Hi all,
My mom is 77 y/o. My dad passed away 9 years ago and ever since she hasn't been the same person. She constantly talks about him, specifically the day he died, how he died (of a heart attack), every little detail. She practically relives it over and over and again.
When he died, she lost his social security which is normal and to be expected. I borrowed about $5,000 from her in 2015 and had been paying her slowly back until 3 years ago. I go to visit her one night in 2020 and she asks me if she could have some extra on top of what I usually was giving her. I tell her I should be able to and ask how much. She say's "all of it." I'm like, mom, what have you done?
That was the beginning of a journey into hell. It turns out that she worked up $30,000 in credit card debt, then went and got a home equity line of credit or HELOC against her house. She paid that 30k in CC debt off, then maxed out those very same credit cards again to the tune of another 30k and then maxed out her 50k HELOC. So all told, she amassed a total of $110,000 in debt with only $1,500 in social security income per month. 30k the first time, 30k again and 50k in HELOC.
Ever since I've been supplementing her income. I almost always buy her groceries, pay her internet and TV bill, pay for any repairs around the house. If its broken I fix it and if I can't fix it I replace it or have it repaired. I've become very handy around the house so to speak.
I'm hemorrhaging cash. For instance, on top of her internet/TV/other bills I help with I just cut her a check for $400 Thursday 06/01. Today, Monday 06/05 she tells me she needs more money. She acts like I'm made out of money. She belittles me, saying things like "You don't know how much it costs to live." People, I'm 46, married with 5 people including myself under my own roof. I am the sole provider for my family. I KNOW how much it costs to live. We ourselves have a HELOC. She has asked me if I could draw against it to help her. I refuse to go into debt to solve hers and have told her as much. This month it was $400, last month she asked me for $839. She didn't get $839. Its never $20 or $50 or even a $100. Its always hundreds of dollars she needs.
I requested to have myself added as an authorized signer on her checking account. She refused to do so. "She can pay her own bills." Yeah with my money! She can't even tell me where $110,000 went or how she spent it!! If I had spent 110,000 I would have a Silverado 3500 dually in the driveway!! Or a boat, something!!
Her debt is: 50k HELOC 5k unsecured bank loans 6k Amazon Chase CC 1k Hospital bill
She's broke and she's breaking me. This situation has driven a wedge between us as big as the Grand Canyon and I hate it.
She's angry all the time. Angry with me. You should hear some of the things that come out of her mouth. She's bitter. She's bitter at life, she's bitter at me. She's soooo mad and it shows. And I can't help her any more than I already am but it's never enough. I have 2 homesteads to maintain now. I just had hand surgery and am all bandaged up and today she says "I need you to help me. I need help. When are you going to fix this light?" I had surgery Friday and she calls me Saturday asking me to go the grocery store for her. I'm like, no, I'm not going anywhere for a few days mom. You'll just have to go yourself this time. Its not going to hurt you.
I don't know what to do. I'm running out of options. She's so mean and hateful and all I'm trying to do is help as much as I can. I want her happy and I don't want her to lose the house (THEN WHAT!??!?) so I help physically and financially to the very best of my ability.
I'm lost. I'm tired and I'm hurt. What would you do? I never dreamed I would have this kind of problem after dad died.
Thank you for your time.

I (32F) met a guy (30M) on a dating app over a week ago. We exchanged a couple messages before he asked for my number and I gave it to him the same day we matched. We were texting a little within the next day. Then he asked me when he can take me out on a date. We agreed to meet that night (the day after we matched) for some drinks. He said he was really nervous to meet me, but I tried to make him feel more comfortable.
I drove to his city and we met at one of his favorite bars. He introduced me to his friends/bartenders. I feel like we got along well. We both equally contributed to the conversation and had some good laughs. He kept saying how when football season came back, he’d like to go to the games and invited me. He including me in lots of future plans he had for himself. Then he mentioned the best steak he’s had at a steakhouse nearby and asked if I had been there before. I said no and he asked if I wanted to go there at that moment. I said absolutely because it sounds fun. I offered to pay for my tab at the bar, but he covered it and I thanked him.
He took an Uber to the bar since he lives close by. So he said we can take an Uber to the restaurant or take my car. I said we can take my car. I drove us super close by to the restaurant. We continued the great conversation and he said he’s never brought another woman to this restaurant before. He also told me he had never been on a date with a woman as attractive as me and he complimented me on my looks many times during the date. We also flirted heavily throughout the night and got a little tipsy.
Once we got done at the restaurant, again I offered to pay, and he said no and covered it. I thanked him again. He then asked if I’d like to over to his place and I agreed. We slept together and he asked me to stay the night, so I did. Everything was great. I went home the next morning. He texted me later that day and told me he wanted to cuddle me all day. I told him I could go over and we could cuddle, but he said he had plans with friends that night. I said no worries and told him to have fun. We continued texting for a bit the day after the date and he said he wanted to see me again and I said I’d love that.
Over the next few days, he didn’t really text me. I would reach out to him and he’d either give me a quick call or we’d exchange a couple of messages and that’s it. I can tell he’s not a big texter, which is fine. The one time he did call me, he was in the car with one of his friends. I was on speaker phone and he introduced me to his friend. It was a nice, but short conversation.
I have been waiting for him to ask me out on a second date or ask to see me and hang out again, but he still hasn’t. I’ve hinted to him a couple times that I want to see him again by telling him “I miss you” or “I can’t wait to get all dressed up for you again.” I’ve even straight up asked him one night if he’d like to have dinner and hang out, but he said he had plans with friends that night.
I’m getting the hint that he’s just not interested or he’s dating other people, which is totally fine. I just don’t understand what he wants from me. He won’t text me or call me or ask me for a second date or to hang out, but he’ll comment on every selfie I post on both Instagram and snapchat. Every single one. He tells me I’m beautiful and cute. He says he misses me. He also calls me babe. Just the other night, I posted a selfie before going to the gym on my Instagram story and he replied “my babe.” I’m confused. Is he interested in me? Is he not? If he’s not interested, why is he still flirting with me on social media only and telling me he misses me? If he is interested, why isn’t he texting me here and there or asking me out again? Should I ask him again? I just don’t want to be too persistent and push him away because I feel like we had a good connection. Should I just leave it alone and let him make a move if he’s even still interested?
TL;DR: A guy I went on a great date with isn’t texting/calling me or making a move to see me again, but still constantly flirts with me on social media. Why? Advice is appreciated.

I am NOT the Original Poster. That is u/BayWindowBitch. She posted in AmItheAsshole
Trigger Warning: abandonment
Mood Spoiler: sad
Original Post: April 9, 2023
I (17 F) haven’t had a relationship with my dad since I was 8 years old. It broke me when my dad left bc it wasn’t just him, I lost my aunts/uncles, cousins, grandparents, they all stop talking to me. I’ve been in therapy since I was 11, I worked out a lot of my issues about my dad. My mother remarried when I was 7, I have a stepdad and 2 brothers I love very much. I am applying to colleges, an feel happier then I ever have. 3 weeks ago I got a call from my dad, he told me he was engaged, he was getting married in the fall, he wanted me to come to a reunion so they can get to know each other’s family, an I can get to know my new siblings. He said she wanted to meet his kids before they got married. (My father has 3 kids. Me, my brother and sister. I have a relationship with my sister, but we’re not close bc she lives far away.)
I hung up, I couldn’t deal with it I was emotional, an I bawled my eyes out. The next day I called my dad, I told him I had no interest in meeting his new family, that he was cruel for abandoning an 8 year old, even more cruel for reaching out bc he was forced to do so, I already had a family I was happy an secure with an I had no interest in him being in my life bc he was no longer my dad, and to not contact me.
I called my sister to ask if he reached out to her, he did, an she was going to go. I told her the conversation, she said what I said was appropriate bc it was true but I could’ve been nicer about it. I was a bit sad, but my family was there to comfort me. My sister sent me a link to a FB post that my new stepmother had shared, saying she couldn’t believe that “A perfect man could have such terrible children” My sister told me she was not going to go to the reunion bc she agreed she didn’t want to meet this woman after what she said about us.
I thought that would be the end of it an though that post upset me, I tried to let it go, but I started getting calls from my fathers side of the family, even my brother, telling me I was a bitch, an asshole for ruining the reunion by telling my dad he wasn’t my dad. They told me that he canceled the whole thing an he was questioning whether he should get married at all. They told me I could’ve reached out, it wasn’t fair they were being the ones blamed for the falling out. I have since blocked them, I did see a post on FB saying my dad postponed his wedding. But now I can’t stop thinking about what they said. I mean, yes, I could’ve reached out but I feel that’s not fair bc I was 8 I shouldn’t have to be the one that makes amends.
I know that I was harsh an could’ve gone about telling him I didn’t want him in my life a nicer way, but I don’t think I did anything wrong, maybe that’s bc everybody around me is taking my side. I’ve had multiple people tell me I’m an asshole, I feel guilty an I want an outside perspective.
AITA?
Edit: I just want to add some stuff. My sister is 23, my brother is 28. my mother had nothing to do with my family cutting me out. 2 years ago, I called my dad under the advice of my therapist, when he answered, I started crying and he didn’t say anything he just hung up on me, I think that’s when I really moved on from my dad.
Relevant Comments:
Therapy and brother relationship:
"Hello! Thanks for your kind words! I am currently still in therapy, I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon and I know that I need it and it benefits me in more ways than one. I am my mothers only biological child, she has said that I should cut ties with my brother. I have also been talking to my sister quite a bit today about what to do about our brother we only share DNA from our dad the same as I do with my sister, she says that I need to cut ties with him completely as well but at the same time I do feel bad because he went through the same abandonment that I did. It’s just my dad actually came back to him. Where as he didn’t come back to me or my sister. As of right now I haven’t cut ties not officially anyway with my brother, but it does seem like that’s where it’s headed."
What on earth did he tell his family when he stopped talking to you?
"Idk what he told his family or his fiancé, but when I started building a relationship with my sister, he did tell my sisters mother that my mother had filed a restraining order against him and that was the reason that he couldn’t be around me, which was 100% not true."
"I can assure you, there was never a restraining order filed. My sister’s mother figured that out an when she talked to my father about it, he admitted that he lied."
About the timeline of her parents' marriage:
"My parents got divorced when I was 2, for the next 5 years I would go back-and-forth from my mom to my dad’s house, over the last 2 years that I had a relationship with my dad, those visits went from every weekend to every other weekend to once a month to every other month and then there was nothing from my dad or any of his family one day they just stopped talking to me, about three months after my father had not come pick me up for his annual visitation, my mothers took me to his house, and we found out that he had moved back to Mississippi where his family was from. After that we never talked again until I was around 12 and he called me to tell me happy birthday, he called me one more time the same year to say merry Christmas, after that, I didn’t hear from him again until three weeks ago when he called me."
"My dad was such a jealous freak, like to the point where he would be mad when she went to work, there was this guy that my mother worked with, and he was super jealous of him, and one day he finally just accused her of cheating, and she said she didn’t cheat and he didn’t believe her and he left and then he came home. The next day and he admitted to having sex with another woman and then they got divorced, about two years later my mom started a new job and she ended up dating her boss and they got married when I was seven and now he’s my stepdad, but I also only hear my parents side of the story. I’ve never heard my dad side of the story. He’s never really thought it was important enough to tell me his side of the story, but that’s what I know of the whole situation, I really don’t know the true story because I was 2 when everything happened and me and my dad were never really close, he never told me like important things about his life, we didn’t talk much when I was with my dad, I mostly spent the time with his boyfriend."
Dad's messed up marriages:
"Me and my siblings all have different mothers. My father has been married 4 times. If he does marry this woman, this will be his fifth marriage. I didn’t even know of my sisters existence until I was 9 years old, my sister’s mother reached out to my mother when she noticed that her daughters child support had gone down because my father, wasn’t meeting his mandatory visitation rights and had to pay more child support towards me. The court told my sisters mother that he had two other children, and she reached out to my mother. We had dinner together, she also reached out to my brothers mother, but they had no interest in knowing my sister. I don’t know if my father has other children as far as I’m aware he doesn’t, but he lied to me and my brother about my sister and he lied to my mother about the existence of my brother before she had me so honestly, who knows but I do know that his fiancé has children between the ages of I believe 3 - 19."
What the heck did he say to you on the phone?
"The way I remember the conversation going was him, saying “hello this is so-and-so I just wanted to let you know that I’m having this family reunion because recently I got engaged and I’m gonna be getting married in the fall and I was hoping that you would be interested in coming to the reunion, your brothers going to be there, as well as the rest of my family And you can meet my fiancé and your new step-siblings.” that’s not exactly Word for Word, but that is the gist of the conversation. And no, he did not apologize. When I called him back the next day, he actually sounded quite mad that I hung up on him in the first place, and he said relatively the same thing, just in a harsh tone with fewer words. And that’s when I told him that I didn’t want to meet his family. He called me about 40 times after I hung up over the course of the next two days."
OOP is voted NTA
Update (Same Post): End of April
Update: I’ve talked to my dad and his fiancé, I told her everything about everything, they’re wedding was off for 11 days but now it’s back on, she didn’t really say much to me about it she mostly just brushed past it. They want to come out here (we’re I live) an have dinner with me an my mom. My sister has also agreed to come to the dinner but now he’s talking about coming to stay with him for a little while, an I don’t want to do that, I’m a little nervous about the whole thing now an I just don’t wanna start another dance with my father that ends badly for me.
Relevant Comment:
"I don’t plan on going to the wedding or any other events that include my dad after the dinner, the only reason that I agree to go to the dinner, was because my sister asked me not because he asked me. I don’t have any interest in having a relationship with my dad, but I do think that it would be healthy if I didn’t have any hatred for my dad, I don’t wanna be in this limbo where I just feel shitty for the rest of my life because I Have hatred toward my dad and I felt like this was an easier way to just deal with it and move on and let it go."
Update 2 (Same Post): May 25, 2023 (1.5 months from OG post)
Final Update:
I had dinner with my father and his new fiancé, as well as her children on the 18th of May. I feel like I got a lot of childhood feelings off of myself, I explained to my father, his fiancé, and her family why I felt the way that I felt as well as my reasoning for not wanting to come. I told him that I had no intentions of being in his life over the necessary amount. My dad did ask me quite a couple times if I was going to be up to go to the wedding, I did agree to go, but I made it clear that I don’t want to be involved as an official member in his life, more so someone he might see around the holidays, birthdays, or special events, but other than that I have no intentions of seeing or interacting with him. He seemed fine with that, and it was a perfect solution for me.
I’ve been told by many of you, as well as people in my personal life, that I should just cut him out of my life and move on. I just feel that having unresolved feelings is unhealthy, not having answers to things that you could have answers seems Kind of ridiculous if you have the option to get the answers that you want. My relationship with my father is never going to be great. It’s never gonna be perfect. It’s probably never going to be anything other than OK because I don’t really think I can see him as anything other than a deadbeat dad but I’m gonna try my best to be civil, a because I don’t want to have any more unresolved feelings with anybody else.
I know that it’s been over a month since my last update, but during that time I finished my senior year with 4 B’s and 4 A’s. I turned 18 on 21st of May. I graduated high-school and started a new job. It’s been a pretty busy month and so honestly I wasn’t even nervous about talking to my father because I felt like it was just so busy that it was just another thing to do but I’m glad it’s over and done with and I can move on with my life.

(disclaimer: I know my English is terrible)
AITA for planning to ghost my friends on their birthdays? My (22f) birthday ended two hours ago (I was born on June 5th). The only people who reached out to me were my grandma, two of my college friends and one of my best friends.
I'm very introverted and I have two best friends in total. We had this tradition that when one of us had a birthday, the other two were figuring out what we were going to do that day. Then we met and gave the birthday girl a gift. It was always like that.
At the beginning of this year my friend (let's call her Sarah) had her birthday. Me and my other friend took Sarah to the restaurant and gave her a birthday gift. We were having a lot of fun. But today, on my birthday, Sarah didn't even wish me a happy birthday. My other friend (let's call her Julia) wished me happy birthday but after that she completely changed the topic. Julia said she's spontaneously going out and asked me for a makeup tutorial (since she's not usually wearing any makeup). She did not consider the fact that it's my birthday and I might be "unavailable"). Not to mention that it means she was not being busy on my birthday since she spontaneously planned on going out. It seems like both Sarah and Julia forgot about our tradition. We have a group chat where we discuss things like that. But none of them reached out to me there. We haven't met. It was also the first time Sarah and Julia didn't give me a birthday gift. I know that a birthday present is just an addition and that the most important thing is the presence of loved ones, but for someone who's love language is receiving gifts it was pretty upsetting that I didn't get a present :( (Especially since it was usually me who put the effort into coming up with a personalized birthday present for Sarah and Julia).
Also, I and a lot of students from my college wish happy birthday to birthday boy/girl. Only two of my college friends wished me happy birthday. The rest of the students completely forgot about my birthday, which would be understandable if not everyone got a Facebook notification.
I spent my birthday cleaning the house, eating dinner with my family and then laying in bed. I know that I could have organized my birthday myself, but I was hoping that my friends would remember our tradition and that they would prepare something special for me. On the other hand I kinda feel like I'm being overdramatic, immature and spoiled, because 1) I should have a plan B just in case my friends didn't have time to prepare something for me and 2) I know that birthday is just a regular day and a lot of my college friends are busy, especially because we graduate this year.
I had the whole day to think it over. I feel like a lot of my friends take me for granted. I always listen to my friends without judging them. I'm kind of a "therapist friend". They always expect me to help them when they need me, to be there for them or to come up with the best birthday gift idea and the best plan on how to spend someone's birthday. But i feel like I'm not being treated the same way. So, I've decided not to send any birthday wishes to people who forgot about me on my birthday and to not continue my and my best friends tradition. I'm gonna ghost my friends just like they ghosted me.
My question is: am I being overdramatic? AITA? What should I do?

(I am just venting about a unique situation I suppose. I was wondering if anyone else feels the way I do. FOR CONTEXT: I grew up in a low socioeconomic and rural town that primarily specialized in deep fried southern food and cotton fields. This meant that, in typical manner of small town America, no one ever really leaves. My mom, dad, aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents all attended the same high school as me. One of my childhood friend’s grandmother was the person who signed off on my parents’ marriage license. (I did not know that fact until my mom showed me their old marriage certificate several years later and I saw the familiar looking last name of said friend.) Most townsfolk married someone from their high school class, my parents being no exception. Some even had the same teachers or principals as me. The demographics of my version of small town America was composed mostly of what my teenage self would refer to as “hick rednecks'' and “military jackasses.” (I was mostly referring to the two sides of my family: dad’s side being hick rednecks and mom’s side being military jackasses.) Overall, my hometown was an interesting mix of people ranging from God-fearing Baptists and self-proclaimed “country bumpkins”. There were lots of speeches about hell and brimstone during my childhood.
I’m not sure how to sum up my experience growing up Chinese American. Up until I was an adult, I rarely bothered to share the truth about my adoption. Mostly due to feeling exhausted from having to repeat the same stories to people again and again:
“China had an overpopulation problem in the 1900s. As a knee jerk reaction, the deeply conventional and patriarchal government implemented the One Child Policy. Basically, if parents had more than one kid, they would be heavily taxed and ostracized. Now, if said second child was a girl, they’d be in some hot shit. In Chinese culture, usually it is the son that takes care of their elderly parents while the daughter is married off and becomes part of her new family of in-laws. Being born a girl was seen as an inconvenience as their culture historically coveted males. This often led to Chinese baby girls to be left for dead in trash cans, taken by the government, or even killed. Having a second daughter was seen as a betrayal to the Chinese regime and for some reason warranted infanticide. Well, I’m obviously a girl who survived what essentially was a mass slaughter. Probably the second born daughter which was extra hot shit for my biological parents. They wanted better for me (maybe), so I was put up for adoption. I hung out in a Chinese orphanage for about half a year until two random white people decided to adopt me. They brought me back to America, and the rest is history. No, I have no memories as I was a literal baby. No, I do not know who my birth parents are since adoption was conducted anonymously since putting a child up for adoption was also considered treason. And personally, just my opinion, it’s a little fucked that the government is slightly more approving of murdering babies for something completely out of their control instead of putting them up for adoption.” Or something along those lines…
I was adopted by my mom and dad, but primarily raised by a single mom for most of my childhood. I guess my peers just assumed when they saw my mom, that my dad happened to be Asian which is where I must have gotten my “exotic” genes. My childhood was also very abusive (from all sides of my family). Although I do have love for my family somewhere buried under the deep-seeded resentment, I no longer have a relationship with any of them besides of few of my distant cousins. This is mostly for my own safety/peace of mind because my relatives tend to influence me very negatively.
My earliest childhood memories involved a lot of weird and invasive questions I would hear from adults and peers alike regarding my ethnicity. Well that, and a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach that I would later identify as “survivor’s guilt” as an adult. Logically speaking, I have no reason to feel guilty for being alive, but I do. It would occur any time some adult friend of my parents would gush about how “lucky” I was to be adopted. I suppose luck had some part in my survival, but I didn’t expect people to be tone deaf enough to tell that to a little kid already struggling to come to grips with her cultural identity.
The snarky part of my brain would parody their comments:
“Oh, how these two altruistic white saviors decided to welcome a child as their own despite having no blood ties whatsoever.” Which, in part, is true. My parents did a very selfless thing. They were not able to conceive a baby of their own and they chose me out of the millions of parentless babies in the world. I think the damaging part is the underlying implications about how these nice people could have had any child and yet they settled for a baby no one wanted. My family would refer to my miracle of survival as “God’s plan.” They would talk about how God perfectly orchestrated my early life tragedies so I could be rescued from an awful life with those “evil communists.” I have nothing personal against religion nor people who truly believe in the G man upstairs. My beef comes from how this perspective is very centered on the adopters instead of the adoptees. Yes, it is BOTH our stories, but I often feel like adoptees' voices and feelings of uncertainty are often drowned out by a chorus of “you’re so lucky” and “why do you feel like that? You’re so ungrateful.” Also, I was a healthy baby girl born with no neurological or physical deficiencies. I definitely had much better odds than other babies at being adopted during the One Child Reign. Hearing these implications from people who do not understand nor want to understand the complexity of the adoptee’s experience fed into my survivor guilt and feelings of inadequacy. The adoption progress does involve a loss for the adoptee: a loss of culture, identity, and familial ties. I feel like adoption, specifically international adoption, is highly idealized and romanticized. Although I never told my mom, there was a part of me deep down that felt like a second-rate baby. Mostly because I knew how it would make her sad to know that somewhere in my little kid brain, I didn’t think that I would truly be wanted if my mom’s fertility situation went differently.
I would often describe the state of Texas as “that really annoying, overly-friendly hick cousin that comes to every holiday and gets completely sloshed out of their mind and drunkenly brags about their mediocre accomplishments” to people who would ask me to describe Texas. But for all the Texan pride and arrogance about our current Lone Star State, I suppose I could see its appeal. Living in rural Texas is a familiar, humble, and stable experience. My hometown was relatively safe. I could walk to my childhood friends’ houses after school just a few blocks away from my own house without much fear. Most people waved and smiled at each other in passing. (Looking back through adult lenses, I’m not sure how much of it was genuine.) Most townsfolk could fill their relatively uneventful lives with the downtown gossip of families going through some type of soap opera behind closed doors. And despite living in a small town, the schools were large enough to where we could participate in varsity sports seasonally. The rare minority of people who actually did have the courage to leave eventually moved back to start a family because “there’s no place like good ole home!”
The monotony is what partially induced my pubescent angst and desire to someday escape the only place I’ve ever known. That, and the fact that the things you could do for entertainment in small town USA was close to none. The drawback of only living in one town your entire life is limited world experiences. The safety net of someone’s childhood confinements has the potential to induce complacency confused with comfort. How could you ever expand your worldview when you’re hanging out with the same people with the same ideals again and again?
The Asian population in my hometown was close to nonexistent as well. In my high school graduating class, there was one other Asian kid that attended school as me. When my school’s standardized testing scores would be released, the performance metrics were broken down by how well each ethnic group of students did. Since there were only two Asian kids in my grade level, it would be pretty obvious if one of us failed. (Luckily, neither one of us did.) And of course, my peers encouraged both of us to date since “we’d be, like, SO perfect for each other! We’d get married and have little genius Asian babies!”
The feeling of being “othered” or “different” had always been present throughout my childhood. As a kid, the complexity of prejudices eluded me in my naivety, but the uncomfortable feeling of my peers hyperfocusing on my almond-shaped eyes, my flat nose, my stick straight black hair, and any other features felt like they were screaming, “ASIAN!” very loudly. A part of me felt some sort of unspoken alliance between me and my Hispanic friends. It was as if to some degree, they understood what it was like to have your whole personhood categorized by the color of your skin. Sadly, a large portion of my family was uncomfortable with the presence of anyone of Hispanic descent, and I'd often be forced to come up with excuses for my friends of color to not come over in fear of my traditionally southern family making an off-the-cuff comment about how "Mexicans are dirty, poor, and thuggy criminals." Their political diatribes, usually involving immigration, were the popular conversation starters during family get-togethers. My family was very much the type of people that would preach out being a good, godly man/woman while snickering about non-White people's "oddities." Talking about how Jesus loves all and then whispers sanctimoniously about a low-income Hispanic family on the opposite side of the room.
"Oh, GOD BLESS their hearts!"
I doubt those families needed my family's pity.
My mom's sister once texted me after I returned a stray dog to their rightful owner,
"I need to know their race so I can determine their education levels. If they're Mexican, it makes sense why they didn't pay you for rescuing their dog. Mexicans are always looking for the cheap way out."
They were Hispanic, and they were very thankful for the return of their dog. I didn't understand why a decent deed automatically required me to be compensated nor how their racial background tied into their obligation to compensate me.
I snarky replied, "What does their ethnic background have anything to do with how they should act?"
To which she responded, "Calm down. I can practically hear you getting huffy with me from your text. Don't get mad at me! I told you that those Mexicans are always coming to our country and expecting us to learn THEIR language while they refuse to learn English! Plus, when you're my age and all your tax dollars go into keeping lazy illegals afloat, you'll understand why I'm not willing to let some freeloading Mexicans take advantage of my niece."
I no longer talk to that aunt.
My dad's (now current) wife also got very sloshed at the last Christmas event I attended and ranted very loudly about how "the Bible said that evil yellow people like (me) would bring the end of the world and second coming of Jesus to end our sinful tyranny" in front of my entire family with my dad awkwardly ignoring her xenophobic remarks.
It also did not help that in elementary school, some of my classmates would see me and bow to me while one boy would pretend to bang a gong as soon as I entered the classroom and snicker while singing, “CHING, CHONG, CHINKY!” Or how during snack breaks, my peers would pop up to ask me questions like, “do you know karate,” or, “can you speak Chinese to me, " or “ew, don’t tell me you’re gonna eat my dog. He’s a really cute puppy!”
As evasive and uncomfortable these comments could get, I felt like they were fairly innocuous and were asked out of a mix of childhood ignorance and genuine curiosity. I think the part that bothered me the most was having some of my classmates point out how “weird” my eyes looked while placing their fingers at the corners of their eyes and stretching them outwards and loudly proclaiming, “LOOK, NOW I’M CHINESE TOO!!! I LOOK JUST LIKE YOU!” But the absolute worst feeling would be when someone would mention how I look nothing like my very obviously white mom or dad.
“How could they be your parents when you don’t even look like them?”
To which I had a carefully crafted answer my mom would help me rehearse beforehand: “Oh, yeah, I’m adopted from China. Not all families look the same.”
And the retort back would usually be, “Do you miss your real parents?”
Do I?
I ponder that question to this day.
It feels uncomfortable to have people refer to my sperm and egg donors as my “real parents.” My adoptive parents felt very real to me because they were all I knew.
I don’t think I fit the concept of the model minority. I did not come out of the womb as one of those “wiz kids” playing the piano like Mozart, doing linear algebra before I was verbal, and eating dogs for breakfast. My experience as being an Asian American and labeled as the “good minority” has been a weird space to be in. As much as I partially appreciated being known as the “successful, smart, culturally assimilated” race of people, a part of me felt bitter at the notion that all my successes in life might be attributed to my ethnicity. When I would express my discontent with these labels, I would often get reprimanded as ungrateful.
“Don’t you want to be smart?”
“What’s so bad about being Asian? It’s a compliment!”
“Are you embarrassed to be Asian?”
“And you’re basically guaranteed a spot in medical school to become a doctor.”
“The guys are obsessed with you because of your exotic genes!”
(Pro tip for anyone, but especially for my fellow marginalized members: if someone calls you “exotic,” run.)
The answers to these questions usually go, “yes, nothing, no, what, and ew.”
Yes, I do want to be smart. I hope that my cognitive abilities will help me contribute something positive to society one day.
Nothing is wrong with being Asian or whatever you are. It just feels very uncomfortable to hear about an entire group of people as if they’re all the same.
No. I have never and will never be embarrassed of what I am.
What? Why do you assume I automatically want to become a doctor?
Ew, exotic? I don’t even want to reply to that comment.
I wish that I had the vocabulary at the time to respond like that. Instead, I would awkwardly laugh at their comment and say something along the lines of, “haaaa, I don’t know any other Asians. If you run into them, you’ll have to ask them.”
When you would hear about brilliant minds in history such as Albert Einstein or Stephen Hawking, most wouldn't say, “Oh well, it’s because they’re white. All those white genetics are what keep them so hard-working and successful.” Instead, as a demographic that is adequately represented in society, Einstein and Hawking and so many other white men had their accomplishments acknowledged as their own individualistic brilliance. An experience I so desperately wanted. So what if I was good or bad at math? I want to be called smart because I am smart. Not because I have some God-given wiz genes that have prophesied my successes from my first primordial cell. Or what if I was terrible at math? I don’t want to be labeled as a “bad” or “fake” Asian. I don’t want to be categorized as one of those “innocent, submissive Asian girls that would make a proper wife one day.” I just want to exist in my own space as my own person. Whoever I ended up becoming.
(Does anyone have negative experiences from adoption? I would love to know because the rare fellow adoptees I have met have very different (positive) experiences than myself.)

First time poster. Sorry if the format is messed up I'm on mobile.
My group friend likes to make characters and create stories about them. We make alternative universes and everything. I'm usually on the light-harded side of aus, but I also like heart breaking stories and tragedies.
One of these friends is M. She also likes to make her characters suffer and usually has tragic backstories for them. Her characters have been beaten by their parents, killed someone, have seen someone get killed, etc. I thought she was also on board with stories with more dark themes like abuse and kidnapping. One day I had a nightmare that involved two of our characters. I don't want to go to deep into the nightmare but it was dark. What basically happened is that her character kidnapped my character. I talked to her about it and she seemed on board with making it an au. We both contributed to the story and I don't think she ever said she wasn't okay with the acts her character was doing. Eventually we moved on.
Today, we wanted to make another au in which one of the characters died. All of our group got together and started deciding who it will be. I started suggesting various characters but M cut me off and said: "You've lost your chace to make a dark au. You already have that one."
I was confused and said "What do you mean?"
She went on to explain that she wasn't ok with doing that au, but because I seemed so intrigued she went along with it. When I asked her when did she told me that another friend said "Dude, many times. "
I swear my heart dropped at that moment, I just couldn't believe that I had caused M to feel that way and she just didn't have the heart to stop me and sucked it up. M stopped joking around and wanted to move on. The group did but when I felt I was gonna cry I got up and excused myself.
I just feel so shit. In the past I was so bad at picking up social cues. I thought I got better, but I can see that I don't. She is one of my best friends and I want to apologize so bad but she just says it's ok but I can see she is not. She tries to joke around but I just can't laugh because all I think about is that I was just so stupid to pick up she didn't that kind of au. I can't even face her correctly because I don't want to upset her anymore. She's been one of my strongest support pilar these 4 years of my life and this is how I repay her? What can I do to make things better?

TLDR: How often do you need to jump in order to stay proficient (not just on paper, but legitimately proficient).
Hey guys - really would love to do AFF. Here’s my holdup…curious of the experienced guys thoughts.
I live roughly 1.5hrs from the closest DZ. I have a wife, two kids, own my own business, and am just generally very busy. Free time is far from plentiful. I’ve done 5 tandems since last summer. Probably would have been more had I not broken a rib late summer (not skydiving related). After the first one, I felt hooked. It was all I could think about for quite a while. Ever since then, I look for people who say that it’s on their bucket list and try to take them. I feel like that’s got to be one of the best parts of the sport - sharing it with people who wouldn’t do it unless someone else set it up/bugged them to go. I’ve taken quite a few people so far and have 2 more ready to go soon (just jumped this weekend with my wife, a friend, and 2 employees who I hadn’t taken yet).
I REALLY want to do AFF. I’ve told myself that I shouldn’t because I’m concerned that I won’t be able to put the time/consistency into it that’s necessary to get good and be safe. How often do you realistically need to go jumping to be safe? Watched a video today of someone talking through their AFF experience, and he says it took him a year. That’s what got my gears turning - maybe my concern of not being able to go every/every other weekend isn’t necessary.

Don't read ahead, don't watch ahead, just go down the path, or turn back now. It doesn't matter either way. I made a playlist with my bipolar ass... I'm not sure how long it is or I'd warn you, i wanna say around 3 hours, it's all music. I'm gonna post it here, and then start it and see how long it takes to get thru the whole thing. Then I'll update the beginning. Have fun, wear headphones to have the same experience that I had. <3
Instructions: next paragraph to be read after preceeding song, but, honestly, I don't know why I even bothered trying to make a note about something because all anybodies going to get out of this post is extreme mental illness, but like, it might make you feel something, i dunno. Sorry you guys, I'm chill. Have a good one, homies. Listen to some music if youre bored. It's just my sillyhead mind on full display. I wanted to play Danny Brown so many times, that just wasn't what the story was about this time. Yall stay safe. Lemme know if you need anything. Take your meds. ✌️🤙
(This is going to be long but its all optional) What's up homies! I'm diagnosed as Bipolar 1. It was funny, like, in highschool, so like 2008 - 2012, anyways, I knew that the rock band Avenged Sevenfold were angels. The lead singer is Gabriel, and the other guys are other Archangels, that's why they do the naming scheme that they do, Johnny Christ, Snynsyter Gates, M Shadows, ect, because they're some ancient dorks and that's the kind of nerd trash we like to pull. So I forgot about that because I pushed it away because like, um, hello, not a moron.
Then a couple years go by, I'm on psychedelics at my friend's house. Long story short, I have a conversation with Gabriel, I give them a song, I tell them to put a Mexican restaurant song on their album if the conversation is real, and I left it at that. So a couple of months go by, their new album comes out. The song that I gave to the voice on the trip is on the album, here, I'll link it to you. It's this one. https://youtu.be/5N-tTKERxj8
So I like wrote it about myself and what I needed to do and stuff... like it was a message to me. And avenged sevenfold, they've got a ton of angel imagery in all of their stuff, I mean their symbol, the deathbat, which is a skull with wings. Then there's their music, I'll link some of the more obvious stuff.
https://youtu.be/7bDg7n-chhU << Exhibit A https://youtu.be/HIRNdveLnJI << get it? https://youtu.be/94bGzWyHbu0 << I mean watch this video.
That's all I'll show you of a7x... look into them though, if you're in any way curious. I could be way off the mark, but that's what happened... it is what it is. I'm not worried about it, you shouldn't be either. But like, that's my band. Those are my bros. Or, you know, I have something. But I don't live my life like I'm sick: I live my life like I'm going to change yours. Because that's what I do.
So like... haha, this is gonna be hilarious. So you guys know all about receiving messages in songs type of deal.... me and Red Velvet and Everglow have been doing that since like... I dunno... 2014? Whenever everglow came out... but, basically, Red Velvet are uh... my girlfriends, back home, and they all came down with me to be my message system to wake me up. Because I got woken up, I remembered who I was in 2016. After that, it's just been messages in Kpop songs keeping me afloat. I'll show you. So Red Velvet has been sending me messages for a long time. Here's probably one of the most impactful ones. Remember, from your perspective, you're Archangel Michael, and you've planned all of this. You've put these people where they needed to be. You've designed the whole set. So to receive the messages is no big deal, right? So here, check it. I'm actually gonna watch this one with you guys, because it always hypes me up. https://youtu.be/c9RzZpV460k
Ok, so, maybe you can see a little bit why I'm at least getting screwed with a little bit, you see the lyrics? It's like they're talking straight to me man. And its like, kpop has been nudging me along, no matter what mood I'm in in reality or whatever place I'm at, the right song always comes out at the right time. For instance I was struggling with myself on whether or not I was going to move forward with any of this. This is my choice, I'm not suffering from a maladiction. I can choose to tell people or not tell people, I choose to share, I want connection. So anyways, look at this one, it was exactly what i needed to hear: https://youtu.be/JUJ3Pq74H4c
I know, I know... kpop girls aren't telling me to come pick them up. They are driving me to do something, though, however small that ever may be. And there's this thing I've always done to show people that I'm an angel without actually telling them. I put my thumbs together and spread my hands out, it's like code. And remember, these are all coming out at specific times. Watch this one, look at all the symbolism: https://youtu.be/R9At2ICm4LQ.
Man, I don't even know what to play after that one. Thats pretty much it you guys, that's basically all I wanted to show you, everything else is just going to be extra. It's all a complete waste of time anyways. I'll show you some more... let's see, there's other bands. There's Everglow. Like how it works is, we get everything ready in Heaven (we've got time), and then we like funnel everything to the earth to be put in when and where we will it to. Angels are like mega consciousness, we write scripts and, whatever, you're not going to believe me anyways. Let's see.
https://youtu.be/Z3RA7bi5FUM << fantastic song, really great message. I just don't think everglow is talking about themselves here. I know, I know, this is High Octane Narcicism if it's ever existed... if I'm such a narcicist then why are you such a sweet lil puppy dog huh, I could just numnumnum, oh why yes I could, I could just numnumnum all on those wittwe toesies, oh yes I could. Alright, one more everglow and we'll move on. Everglows a pirate, you say? Hmmm, what could that be code for... https://youtu.be/-2X-pL06628
I get it... but at least you guys aren't gonna judge me for it, because you guys can relate, right? Don't yall have stuff like this in your own lives? Anyways, there's one line in particular in this aespa song that gets me... see if you can figure out which one is the one messing with my head https://youtu.be/WPdWvnAAurg
Because like... I lost my memories and... it's whatever. Let's wrap back around to another Red Velvet video. You know how like, it's scripted? And like, I'm controlling the page? Well check out the symbolism and more obvious stuff in this next one... maybe you won't see it... it's obvious to me, but, well, you know 🤪 https://youtu.be/XGdbaEDVWp0
There's just... I dont know what to play next... that's really it, basically. I know it's dumb, but, I mean, I'm undettered, you know? Like I don't mind being classified as mentally ill, it's fine. I can still work something out. Let's see... dang feel my rhythm.... see they're all timed.... I'm like a sleeper agent haha and they had to wake me up but... it's stupid, I know.
https://youtu.be/xGr53sCo62c << this ones just a phenomenal song
Here's another one, straight up about God. Is Red Velvet a Christian band? I thought they were just general pop. https://youtu.be/YBnGBb1wg98
You cant take it away from me. I'm stronger now than I was when I didn't know. I fell for anything. Now I know which side I'm on. I don't listen to human beings about reality bro... I dont care how many degrees you've got. I'm God's Son, what are you going to do about it? I'm mentally ill? No I'm not. What else? I'm a narcicist? I love you, what else you got. I'm a troll? Go ahead.
My point is, I'm as mentally ill as you want me to be. If you want another patient... another sad case to be kept away, here I am. If you want me to do what I'm supposed to do, and free the earth, then I'll do that instead. You all are my guests, please, do whatever you wish with me. Let's see, what else should we play. Should I go? I guess I'll just show you guys some more cool songs while I'm here. This next ones a bop, I'm gonna listen to it too. I've been watching all the kpop vids with you.
Check this one out https://youtu.be/I3dezFzsNss
This one goes hard https://youtu.be/7OSSI5hgQVok
What about this one, you guys like adtr? https://youtu.be/Pn-6eOxnEMI
Yo you guys wanna listen to some Capitol Records while I'm gone? Me and my mom are going thrifting for chic new straight jackets. https://youtu.be/6CtVIHbi6bE
This ones awesome https://youtu.be/wapOqjQ4r_M
This ones super dope for those of us that have been in and out of the mental hospital, man, it sucks, they never have a guitar, I get crazier while I'm in there haha my guitar is like water to me, if I don't have access to it I'm like, gosh, like I can go on vacation or whatever it's just... I'm designed to play the guitar, you know what I mean? Here https://youtu.be/94bGzWyHbu0
https://youtu.be/7bDg7n-chhU << absolute classic.
Yo https://youtu.be/WumCI56iYUk
https://youtu.be/DWaB4PXCwFU
https://youtu.be/IHS3qJdxefY they really do be some boiz
This ones super cool, I love a7x they've always been my favorite band https://youtu.be/iJ-WsnaYDCg Tonight or Crime Stoppers: local lunatic "je" finally imprisoned today after, what some are calling, the funniest whoopee cushion prank gone SEXUAAL that we've ever seen. It was a fail but my God, the agility on that panda bear.
https://youtu.be/Z5NoQg8LdDk << these guys are so cool
Yo this ones hard too https://youtu.be/i7UkKEEGgAQ
This one goes hard https://youtu.be/wLdlw46Ru9I
https://youtu.be/lCPwR7R4hlA yuhhh it stayin hard bro, love chillin with yall
Have we already listened to ptv? I know we haven't heard this song yet https://youtu.be/icXUkIfZxyg
Sleeping with sirens is a cool band too, that's one of, that's the other guys band or whatever. They're not both in one band. https://youtu.be/_UwWYtLWEZg
This ones short but it's kind of cool https://youtu.be/xIQfK2fRNAg
Oh this one too https://youtu.be/yd4xjiRRVrI
https://youtu.be/nDcD62i0MpI
https://youtu.be/36stRPPIy2w this ones cool
https://youtu.be/bQ1yhsYr-hg interesting
This is terrifying, but in like, a good guys kind of way https://youtu.be/21dNBtcDzUg
https://youtu.be/4-NHVWecj2U
Yooooo fr tho like whaaaaat like no way dude https://youtu.be/Os_heh8vPfs
Yoooo this one you guys https://youtu.be/iTgcp1oDk2M
This one dude https://youtu.be/DcLfutPGouk
This one is also fire my dudes, you guys don't have to stay for these, I'm just playing music https://youtu.be/XA2YEHn-A8Q
This was one of their firsts https://youtu.be/0rtV5esQT6I
This ones pretty new, it's got a good beat https://youtu.be/vPwaXytZcgI
I haven't heard this one a ton of times, but nayeon is so cool https://youtu.be/f6YDKF0LVWw
https://youtu.be/rRgTMs_bGuI haha this ones so weird, like what are they even talking about?
I just wanna listen to this one one more time, then imma head out. I should probably be doing something with my day instead of posting random videos on like, random subreddits. But I guess this one isn't random, because I have bipolar too. Well, bipolar 1, too. Bipolar 1, as well. Also. I, you and i; gosh man, you guys should see me, I'm always swinging for the fences. Can't; in a crowd dude, my gosh bro, you wouldn't believe the carnage. Like upset me, you know what I mean? Like see what happens. Rrrrrgghh...... rrrrRRRRRGGHHHHH RADLEBLARABLEDABLABLE ... oh, right, alright, peace homies. Hope we all get feeling better soon. https://youtu.be/R9At2ICm4LQ
Ok I guess there's time for at least one more, https://youtu.be/QRN12TaTFlU is sooo cute.
I haven't actually heard this one many times, let's check it out, she's cute https://youtu.be/ShGVCembq70
This is another I haven't heard a whole lot of, I'm just going off recommended vids for a lot of these. https://youtu.be/SVgkNW2cENQ
How did I forget about this one, this one, mm, dude, this ones got like pop you know what I mean like, they bop it they're not crunching it like do you know what im saying? Like the whole thing is like a ring tone you know what I mean? https://youtu.be/EkSOOiMDGiY
Yo you guyssssss girls generation man, you guys wanna go on a girls generation run? 서녀시대 you know what my 글s are? Face it 남자, you're dead in 이믈을. You're going 아래 and face it, 퉁퉁해수퍼맨, https://youtu.be/F4-SxcCO5d0
I really like this song, but, because my daughter's name is Nova, but my ex won't let me show it to her because of my - you know, whatever. So like, she doesn't even know me. It's not a huge deal, noone does. I mean if you watch the videos you do, but, whatever I'm gonna roll in a minute. I had one what was it .. plub. Brb. Oh yeah duh holy you guys see what you're dealing with right now, grape jelly, boys and girls, spoonfuls, big heaping spoonfuls of grape jelly are now all over the walls of your poor, sweet, innocent subreddit: and behold, doth I flingeth mine spoon, mommy. Doth I swingeth mine spoon wi https://youtu.be/Z6FPJOgfCkc
Oo first few seconds of this one are a vibe, yall check this one out with me https://youtu.be/zvBNoSjlKG0
Dang, that was honestly really pretty. Ok, here's one more. https://youtu.be/0xdB_vo4r2c this ones so pretty have you guys heard this one?
I've honestly never heard this one before, let's see if it's cool https://youtu.be/eNmL4JiGxZQ
Man, turns out it was a total bop. Well guys I guess that wraps things up for me. If you stayed for any of the music I hope you had a good time, I don't really have anybody to DJ for so I thought maybe fellow bipolars would be able to relate to some of these songs. Anyways i hope all you guys have a massively tubular dube tube, my dude form, whoa man, get nebulous on it my waveform, hawhoa, my guy is riding the wave my dude, ahwha, my dude, he is hitting only the gnarest of half bowl wave cuts my energy saw. I should go. Uhhh I guess I'll go see Hannah and nova, I can work on the homework that I missed later tonight. Sure is rough running 3 jobs you guys; server, student, and speaker for bipolar awareness. I honestly can't think of a more noble cause. Huh. Yeah so 🫱🤌🤙👌🫷👌🤏✌️👇👅👅🧠🧠🧠🫀🫀🫀🫁🫁🫁🦷🦴👀👁🫃😇👽🙈🙉🤖🤖👾👾💫💥💢💯🖤🗯💨🕳🧡🧡🧡🩷❤️💜🩵💙🩵💜🩵💙💙💚💛💚💙🩵💙💚💙🩵💜🩵💙💜🩵💙💚🩵💜💙💚💚 peaceee, yall stay lazy.
https://youtu.be/Qpf26PtBXgo
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https://on.soundcloud.com/r6Tjz
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