So phresh litter

I 22F am separated from 25M. I met, let’s call him John, early 2021. We were in school together, but rarely spoke. A week after school ended, we started hanging out and soon started dating. Things seemed great, he was kind and loving, had a good job and treated me well. We moved in together in September of 2021. Things were still going well, until suddenly he decided we were getting married. We had talked about marriage before, but never seriously. He had a ring and put it on my finger without even asking if i would marry him. May of 2022, i was walking down the aisle in a white dress too a man i believed to be good and kind. Fast forward to 2023, and I’m living in a house with a man who will not pick up after himself and expects me to act like a mother cleaning up after him. I couldn’t keep up, as I was working a full time job and looking after the 6 pets we had on my own, and our house was littered with trash and it was like living in a dump. I felt like I was living with a toddler. I tried many times to get him to give me a hand around the house and he works pout and come up with excuses every time. I got sick of it and told him i would leave him if things didn’t change. Around this time he started helping out more! I felt the weight of the world lift off of me for the first time in a while. We started hanging out with friends more and going to the bar etc. one night, we had a few friends over, and sociables turned into a threesome with a very handsome man (37M), which John initiated (he’s Bi). Almost immediately after this, John went back to not lifting a finger around the house and kicking and screaming if I asked for help. I felt like I was going insane as my house quickly went back to being a dumpster. I even told my husband that the houses condition was making me sick. I stopped eating and lost a lot of weight and was constantly missing work due to being sick from anxiety and stress. I tried to find solutions, even saying we could hire a house cleaner to help us once a week. He and I both had good jobs and it would have been more than easy to afford. He agreed to this compromise, but would then spend his entire pay cheques on comics and figurines, posters, etc. when my pay cheque came, the entirety would go to bills and groceries because I had no other option. I felt like he was making it impossible to fix the problem. I became emotionally detached and knew I needed to leave him, but needed to save enough money to be able to get an apartment and leave safely. At this time, I felt numb. I went through every day hating my life. I would come home from work and sit in my driveway for an hour dreading going inside. One day, I got a message from the man we had a threesome with, we can call him Dan, and we started a friendly chat that lasted a couple of months. As much as I tried to tell myself I wasn’t, I was falling in love with this man. One day, I was so overcome with these emotions, that I found myself driving over to his place. We talked for a while and ended up having sex. This happened 3 more times over the next 2 months. I was still saving money and still planning on leaving my husband, but didn’t tell Dan as I was still telling myself I wasn’t in love with him. Then, February of 2023 shit hit the fan when Johns sister texted me, saying she knew I had cheated. I knew I had to tell John before he heard it from someone else. When I told him he and I both cried and he left and never came back. This is what I needed. I know I hurt him, but the truth coming out forced me to have the courage to leave the relationship. I needed out for my own mental health. I went to see Dan a couple of weeks later, and we started seeing each other more frequently. He asked me to be his girlfriend, and I feel like my soul was meant to Bebe with Dan. I have been dating him for 4 months now, and have a great relationship with his preteen daughter. I feel happier and healthier than i have ever felt before, and know Dan treats me the way i deserve to be treated. I have even had multiple friends tell me that they have never seen me as happy and healthy as i am now. So AITAH for cheating on my husband and dating the man i cheated with?

So we have 3 Cats, all adults, my wife wants to purchase a Automatic self-cleaning Cat Litter Box, its 600$ but on sale for 400$. Has anyone used these with multiple cats? Does it work well, and it is worth the $$?

I have an almost 7-month-old long hair mini doxie named Opal.
Keep this in mind as I'm telling you what's going on: Her potty & bowel movements have always been regular and her mood and behavior have not changed since I brought her home, if anything she's just gotten more mature, playful, outgoing, and loving.
Ever since I got her at 9 weeks, she's always been super picky about food and has never been excited to receive meals, just treats. She doesn't even really show interest in water, it's only when she really needs it. The breeder started her on the Purina puppy kibble food program before I picked her up and I continued on with it up until now. As I said, she's never been excited about eating, so I've even tried changing up the mix. I've tried adding little pieces of carrots (her fav treats are carrots and blueberries), bone broth, mixing the Purina puppy wet food with dry, and now currently I've been feeding straight-up Purina puppy wet food and it's still not getting her to eat. At one point I even tried changing the producer of the food and nothing. When I do try all these changes, she may be interested for maybe a day or sometimes just the first meal but after that, she doesn't want to touch it. As far as wet food goes, I split cans and put the remaining in the fridge so at first I thought she doesn't like cold food. I'd let it sit there for just 10 min or so just to get that initial cold out of the food all the while trying to build up her anticipation and excitement to eat and that didn't solve it. Then I started getting the smaller cans which would allow her to eat more freshly opened food and she doesn't even want it at room temp right out of the can.
Since day 1, she's gone to work with me and we're situated in my own little office, so I've made sure that her feeding area is safe, quiet, and completely her zone. Same at home. Our Mon-Thur routine starts with me waking up at 5 am, taking her to the bathroom, and then she falls back asleep while I shower and get ready for the day. We get to work a little after 6 and then she lays back down in her bed until about 730 or 8. Sometimes she likes to stay up when we get to work and play so then I'll feed her around 7ish because her last meal was at 6 pm, but I try aiming to feed her at 8 am every day.
It wasn't until about 6 or 7 weeks ago that she really just stopped eating on our routine and only started eating when she was starving. A few days go by and she skips breakfast at 8 am in this new phase. At 930 am she started throwing up yellow foamy bile, she did that about 4 times and then dry heaved another 3 or 4 times. But after that is over, she's back to her normal and playful self. I called the vet as soon as they opened at 10 am. They asked me to come in at the end of the day since she was showing no other signs, symptoms, or behavioral changes. I brought her in and the vet did his exam and wanted me to bring her back the next day because he wanted to run some blood work and do xrays of her intestinal tract to make sure it wasn't a blockage.
I drop her off the next day and long story short he tells me blood work came back perfect but he finds what he thinks is a blockage where the small and large intestine meet. He asks me the basic questions "Has she eaten anything or gotten into anything that she wasn't supposed to?", "What kind of toys does she have? Did anything come off the toys?". Opal is by my side 23/7. The hour that she's not with me is when she's sleeping in the morning and I'm doing my routine or other misc. That being said I watch her like a freakin hawk, I see everything that she gets into (which isn't much), and I monitor her playing with toys or certain treats. I'm very confident in saying that. The vet sends me home with some Laxatone to give to Opal 3 times a day for the next couple of days and told me to monitor her poops. AGAIN her poops have always stayed regular, even if she didn't eat, she would still poop 2 times a day.
Over the next couple of days, I gave her the Laxatone and nothing much changed for her other than softer poops. So we go in for another check-up and he wants to do another round of X-rays to see what's going on in there. Later on in the day he calls and says what he thinks is a blockage is still in the same spot, so they gave her some Barium Sulfate so they could trace that going through her with more X-ray$. The next morning Opal passed the Barium Sulfate along with regular stool because again, there's been no problem in the poop dept. I take her to the vet again the next day and he takes more X-ray$$$ and tells me that whatever he thought was a blockage has now moved into her colon so that's good news. So we go about our daily routine and I'm waiting for whatever the "blockage" is to come out. During the 2 routine poops that day, it was regular poop and what looked like a small tangled hairball but nothing to make me go holy cow, that was the blockage.
This whole ordeal with the vet lasted about a week and after when kept wanting to do more X-ray$$$$ I just told the front desk lady that I'm going to take Opal to get a 2nd opinion so please forward me her medical records and all the xrays that the doctor took. I called the 2nd vet and requested an appt. and they say they would need the medical records and they would contact Opal's original vet for them. The original vet took a week to get Opal's file together and produce the X-rays for the 2nd vet.
During that time, I discovered that if Opal eats breakfast then she doesn't throw up, but if she doesn't eat breakfast, she throws up around 9:30 am every single time and it's always yellow and foamy. Correct me if I'm wrong but when we humans go a long time without eating, some of us will feel nauseous, right? I'm thinking that the same thing is happening for Opal, but she is such a picky eater that she'll literally wait to eat until the nauseous feeling overpowers her to the point of actually vomiting. Now she doesn't even want to touch her bowl, she just tries scooting the area around it with her nose but never touches the bowl. As a last resort, I tried feeding her with a spoon right out of her bowl, bringing her closer and closer with every bite until she was eating over her bowl or at least picking at enough to put something in her stomach.
Trust me, it's the last habit I want to create with her but I don't want to have to deal with the vomit later and/or her not feeling good. Regardless if she eats or not, she stays the same Opal, just throws up if she doesn't eat breakfast. Strange thing is that Opal is the only one out of her litter and family lineage to be experiencing these symptoms. In the past month, she's thrown up 1 morning and that's because we slept in really late and she woke up hungry as hell I guess.
Has anyone else experienced anything similar?

I know, that’s one hell of a title, but that is legit what is happening.
Tl;Dr: Niece moved in with us last year; kicked out of grandparents. Turns out she is a mental nightmare of a human. The agreed upon moveout date is finally here but she isn’t ready. She recently started bringing a guy over; we believe she is intentionally trying to get knocked up in hopes he will take care of her. No way this guy has the finances to take care of a family.
Last year in a July, my girlfriend approached me about her niece staying with us for a couple months so that she can get on her feet. I didn’t ask any questions, figured things would be fine, I wanted to be supportive because GF always wants so desperately to help her family.
Well she moved in and this girl is a fucking terrorist. It would be impossible to go over every stride we have encountered, but here is a detailed list of stand outs: - Demands money left and right from aunt. Food, unnecessaries for the room, an insane amount of sweets, SO MUCH WEED, etc. - Took 6 months to get a job. Got one at month 4 but quit after first paycheck. Legit smoked weed and sucked dick in her room for Months on end. - We got a kitten soon before she moved in. Long story short she would steal it and put it in her room anytime she had the chance. Just started calling it her cat one day. We ended up giving it to her cuz she needs some form of healthy attachment. She refuses to do any chores revolving around the cat. Sometimes she will feed it, but she will bitch that I asked. - Massive temper tantrums. Criticism, fear of judgement, any advice that clashed with her worldview, getting take out without her, going to take out she didn’t want, going to grocery store without her, etc; all would result in scream cries. - In the entire time she’s been here I can count the amount of chores she has done in my hands. We had to stop asking because dealing with the attitude and crying wasn’t worth the shit job at the chores she would do. - Selfish af. Still to this day send massive lists for the grocery store just littered with expensive bullshit. (I started going grocery shopping on my own, because when GF and Niece went, the bill would be closer to 800 instead of 300) - She destroyed that bedroom, after she is gone we are gonna have to go through days of cleaning to get rid of the smell. Piles and piles of moldy fur covered dishes, She hauls them out late at night and blasts them with water; imagine waking up to the smell of hot mold and somehow a shit ton of dishes in your clean sink. She probably vacuumed twice in there, never has washed her sheets, got a dead gecko with a heat lamp i it’s corpse, mountains of garbage and half eaten food.
There are so many toxic and vile things she does and says. She has no idea how cruel, demanding, and selfish she can be.
That being said, she can be kind of she wants to. But she is also a fucking idiot with her money. Because she doesn’t have any bills or rent, this dumbass thinks she’s rich. Shes been trying to hide it from us, but she basically been giving her money away. Shes been helping her friend by financially supporting the friends kid. Buys takeout everyday for herself and friends, her vaping, her dabbing…. So much bullshit she buys for her friends.
Just to note, we have approached her about all of the things above and it results in a total meltdown. Im not this bitches father dude. In fact, she should be treating me like a saint, being willing to put up and pay for her ass so that she doesn’t end up homeless. I get fucking nothing but disrespect out of this ordeal and she couldnt give a shit.
Throughout the passed couple months she has been trying her best to drop subtle hints/allude to the fact/coax words out of our mouth; she wants to stay past the agreed date near the end of this month.
FUCK THAT.
We haven’t budged an inch; she found out she was going to be homeless if she didn’t do something.
Cue this random dirtbag.
This poor dummy looks around my age. He is always dirty looking, haven’t heard him speak much but the way he talks makes him sound uneducated as fuck. Niece is ecstatic with him because he is the first dude she has brought over who owns his own car and has a job.
The reason I call this guy a dirtbag is because from what I can see, he is just trying to get laid with some pussy that is way to young for him. I know Niece is a legal adult but idc dude, fuck someone your own age; thats creepy.
Anyway,
The other night im in the livingroom and I over hear Niece on the phone in her room. I couldn’t hear everything, but something todo about niece and pregnancy.
I didn’t look into it.
Flash forward talking with Gf. She tells me that Niece isn’t on BC, and that dirtbag has been coming over every night to fill the tank.
We think she is trying to get pregnant, so that she can force her way into dirtbags home.
Gf gave the classic objections when Niece told her these things but really guys… we don’t give a shit.
She is gone in almost two weeks, and I could give a fuck if she ends up pregnant and homeless… the way she has treated me, a person who welcomed a total stranger into their home, fed them, housed them…. Dude I’ll probably chuckle when I see the misspelled words on her sheet of cardboard.
I am predicting a drastic fall out. Im guessing a fake pregnancy, that results in dirtbag turning tail and running. Her plans of baby trapping will have failed and she will fall into misery. She will beg to stay and it’s not going to fucking happen.
Idk what advice I am looking for really. There is SO MUCH MORE to the story but idk the point in going over all of it.
I guess I dont love the idea of kicking her out to homelessness, but im at my end dude. She has caused so many problems for Gf’s and I’s relationship that it’s a miracle we haven’t started going after each other the way Niece comes at us.
Do I try to parent this Niece? Is it worth it, to suffer through her berating me and scream crying when I tell her how disgusting intentionally babytrapping some one is? Do I tell her that her requirements for baby daddy material are abysmal?
Or do I do nothing and live in peace?

I live in a duplex and we’re not allowed to do any yard work, so we can’t plant in the ground, we can’t even mow our own yard.
2 years ago, my boyfriend and I built our own raised garden bed and it has worked great every year. This year, however, is the first time I’ve noticed cats getting in it and using it as a litter box. I come out to water and there are huge holes dug and of course cat poop.
What are some things I can try that are humane, won’t kill my plants, and could deter them from getting up in it?

I am in my mid 30's with three children. I planned to be Child Free my whole life, but abuse happens. For the last five years, I have had zero energy. My period has gotten worse and worse, to the point where I had slept away the last few months. I couldnt even text friends and family, the dishes piled up in the sink, the litter box reeked, etc. Always sick, chronic illnesses, a haze of exhaustion clouding my head. This surgery was a terrifying concept for me because it was my first ever surgery and I have chronic anxiety and depression and I was terrified of being put to sleep.
Anyway, I am now two weeks post surgery. Laparoscopic hysterectomy with four incisions, each an inch long into the abdomen. I never needed the pain medicine, just took Ibuprofen a few times. The gas going up to the shoulders hurt the worst, which is a good thing! It's only been two weeks and I am so happy that tears are constantly trying to spill over. I am ALIVE for the first time in YEARS. I can BREATHE. I can THINK. The chronic stomach pain and anxiety is gone! Which is interesting because my mother, grandmother, aunts, and cousins who all had a hysterectomy had severe anxiety afterwords. I'm only two weeks post surgery and my house is clean, cleaner that it has been in my entire life. I don't need naps at all, let alone to sleep all day. I can sit outside and just enjoy the breeze. When my third (autistic) child has a tantrum I respond with a clear head and don't have to retreat in tears to let someone else help her (I am autistic as well, and I am a person too, dear friends).
If you need this surgery and are having second thoughts, I just wanted to let you know that it will be okay. I know most people want children and I had three, (even though I very much did not want children) but this was the best decision I have ever made in my entire life. If I could go back and do it as a teenager, I would. Your health, your life, THAT is what is important. My periods took every ounce of life I had. I am so thankful that I could have the surgery in my 30's and I have so much more time to LIVE. I'm so sorry for the people who are having it rough. My entire life was rough, and I am so blessed to have this go so well. I just wanted to let you know that things really can go right, too.

I'll be going out of town briefly for about 24 - 30 hours, my usual pet sitter who comes to my home has cancelled on me and I'm struggling to find another that I trust in time. I've made arrangements to drop my dogs off with my brother, but his own dog isn't cat friendly so the kitties can't go.
They each have their own rooms with a litter box, food, water, beds, hiding places and toys. If I leave down plenty of dry food (they're not greedy), water and an extra litter box each will they be okay being left on their own while I'm gone? One is still a kitten, I'm unsure if she'd be best off alone or with the older cat, they adore each other and are always together but sometimes he plays too rough and makes her squeak & I have to tell him to let her go.
Thanks.

Hi, I’m a single mom (33 F) with a 5 month old baby girl and two cats. Both cats are female, 2 and 3 years old (Tortie and black DSH).
I am moving across the country from MD to FL at the end of August to live with my parents so that I can raise my child with support (not my ideal scenario but I am grateful for the help). I am planing on shipping most of my items, but I will be flying with both cats (in the cabin) and my daughter.
Here’s the complicated piece of it: I will be moving into a 4 bedroom, 2.5 bath (one story) home on a corner lot. The house is spacious enough but I don’t know how I will situate their litter box, and I also am not sure how to give them access to the kitchen without risking giving them access to the backyard. I also have no idea how to feed them in the kitchen because the dogs eat their food in bowls on the floor, they’ll eat the cat food if I put it down there and I don’t want any fights.
None of our bathrooms are big enough or suitable for a litter box. I plan to get a Litter Robot that I will try to put in the corner of the living room for them. We do not really use the living room because the current furniture is scratched up by the dogs and the TV is smaller than the one in their tiled “den” attached to the kitchen. The kitchen is a no go for the litter box, no space and my parents would be too grossed out by that.
The dining room area is attached to the kitchen, but we have French doors that open out to the back patio space (not enclosed, covered or screened in) and the rest of the back yard.
The backyard is not safe for them to be out there at anytime; there is a 6 foot wood privacy fence, but wildlife (possums, raccoons, coyotes, hawks and other neighborhood cats) is a real concern. For that reason, there also isn’t a doggy door for the two small dogs, they are let out and back in through the one French door that opens (the other doesn’t). I would love to put a high safety gate in place so they could see out but not GET out, but that won’t work since I would have to get several extension pieces; the doors are inline with the wall and the walls are over 6ft apart.
I am already going to bite the bullet and get a safety gate for the den connected to the kitchen, we’ll be in there a lot and while we can’t have the cats in there at all (brand new furniture my parents don’t want scratches and also more French double doors that open out to the driveway/street) I want them to be able to see in.
My parents already got some kind of folding door for the living room to cut them off from the kitchen, my room, the den, and backyard, but I don’t think that solution is going to work by itself. The cats will scratch the hell out of that door bc they are not used to being separated from me. I could put their food and water fountain in the cat tree but I would still feel bad about them having 0 access to that part of the house. They also like to sleep with me in bed, so I want them to be able to.
Obviously all animals are going to need slow, supervised introductions with barriers between them until everyone can figure out how to get along well. My cats are used to small dogs so I’m not too worried, but they do get annoyed by play with dogs when they’ve had enough and don’t feel like being chased (they will happily initiate chases with each other and small dogs when they’re in the mood).
I could keep both cats in my room for a few days, but that doesn’t seem fair, and there’s no room for a litter box or a tree where they could hang out. I will definitely have cat wall shelves installed for them, but it might not be right away. My daughter will also be sleeping with me in my room until we clean out what will be her nursery, so it’s cramped as it is.
Does anyone have some ideas? Experience with moving into a multi-gen household with other pets and multiple entrances? We’ll need to baby proof anyways so it seems that most of these adjustments I’ll need to make for the cats will also work for the baby. I’ll be paying for whatever gates or things we need since I’ll be saving money living there.
Advice appreciated!
TLDR: moving into my parents 1 story 4 bed/2.5 bath house and I need to separate them off from having access to the den and dining room French doors. They need freedom to roam but I don’t know how the hell I should set them up to be comfortable and safe.

Just a disclaimer, I am a 15 year old female with dark hair and bright eyes which is what most people would consider "The Supermodel Look". I am also quote tall (over 5'8 I'm just not sure lol). Now before I begin this story, I just want to say that I believe that kindness takes you far and I don't like being rude at all, I would never fight a girl over a guy. Even if I'm in a bad mood I always try to be nice and seem like an approachable person even when it may be tough to do so. I just try to be a nice person and I think everyone should aswell. Anyways there are a few stories in this so buckle up.
Yesterday, I was out shopping with my Father like a FatheDaughter day out. I decided to wear shorts and a white tank top as we are currently at the time of this story in June. Now, the shorts I was wearing were not short. Quite strange to hear from a girl my age as some of us could go out shopping in a tiny bikini and say its suitable lol. But they really weren't, they were about 2 inches above my knee and the tank top went all the way down to the waistband of the shorts. If you have an image in your head you would understand its not in anyway sexually revealing, plus I'm 15 and I can't really show off my body, and I don't want to. So, we were walking through the mall and a man and his wife were walking by, (I know it was his wife because they were holding hands and they both had rings on) and we were walking towards eachother for a good 8 seconds and the whole time the man was just staring at me. I of course stared back because this has happened over 7000 times in the past so now I feel like doing it back. We held eye contact for a bit before he got embarrassed and looked ahead and so did I. But then I looked back at him and there he was staring at my chest whilst his wife was there. I scoffed loudly while looking him up and down making sure he heard and saw me. He quickly looked ahead. This infuriated me as my heart went out to his wife. I know if I had a husband and he was not only looking at other girls chest, but a minors chest?? I would be absolutely furious with him. Absolutely disgusting. I kept walking alongside my father and I just shook my head. He asked me what was wrong and I didn't even want to begin because I was so used to it by then.
Story 2.
So about a week prior to the previous story a friend and I were walking outside beside a big road. We were both wearing denim shorts and jackets. I was wearing a crop top but she was wearing a T-Shirt. Suddenly a car comes speeding up the road. It just so happened to be clear with nobody else out walking and not too many cars on the road. Again, it was a man in the car by himself. He quickly comes to a halt and stops his car on the curb. He does a full 90 degree turn and just stares at us while checking us out. The man was over the age of 45 and I genuinely felt sick to my stomach. I gave him the middle finger and he sped away. Me and my friend were laughing about it awkwardly but I think we both knew how uncomfortable we were. Again, Absolutely disgusting.
Story 3.
The same friend and I were in the city center just walking around, shopping etc. We were stopped at a crosswalk waiting for the signal to turn green. Infront of us were two rough looking men. And when I say that, they were dirty, missing teeth, dirty finger nails, but they were wearing 'designer' so I think you know what I'm trying to say and it's not 'homeless'. One of them turns around of just starts staring at us. Particularly my friend. He nudged the other guy and he begins staring at me. Not even trying to hide it, just straight up, full body turned staring at us and they were both doing a nasty looking smile at us while staring at everything but our faces. They both look at eachother and both nod in approval. These men were like mid 30s atleast. Once again, DISGUSTING.
Story 4.
This time I was walking past a bar with my mom. This was only about 3 weeks ago and it was pretty hot so there were tables and chairs outside for people to sit on. So, as I was walking past there were a group of men, mid 40s. They were all talking until my mother and I walked past. One of the men completely stops talking to watch us walk past which obviously instigated the other men to turn around. Just. Staring. The. Whole. Time. D.I.S.G.U.S.T.I.N.G. Oh and yes they were staring at my butt the whole time.
Story 5.
I was in the airport with my parents as we were going to visit family on the other side of the US. I live in California and they live in Florida. So we were sitting down waiting to board the plane. There was a man. Probably late 30s with his family. He had 3 young children with him. One in a stroller and the two were probably 7 or 8 sitting next to us. I wasn't using my phone, I was just sitting there because I didn't want to use the battery on my phone or any other device so I was just glancing around. So the Father had the phone very close to his face. And sort of aimed towards me because he clearly didn't want his wife or kids to see what he was looking at. He was on Instagram, and you know when you go to search something on Instagram a bunch of pics come up beneath it that are based from your search. Well yeah, there were a bunch of girls in bikinis. They definitely weren't minors thank god but it was a bunch of Instagram models filled with filters and surgeries. I wanted to take the phone and throw it across the airport. This man is sitting beside his wife and family of young children and is sitting there, staring at these unrealistic images of half naked women. Please control yourself. It made me sick.
I could go on for hours, days, weeks and even years with stories of men being absolute perverts or just being so careless of their families because they want to look at half naked women online but I don't wanna waste anyone's time.
Now, i just want to say I'm not one of those girls who take part in the 'kill all men' horse crap and im certainly not a girl who hates men for no reason. I am friends with some boys who are genuine sweethearts and I hold out for them to go far in life and have loving families etc. But the way men act nowadays has a huge influence on young boys to act just as perverted and creepy as they are and it will create a chain of absolute pedophiles throughout the coming decades. It has to stop. Some parents have to be aware of how their children speak about others, particularly women because if you've ever heard how they speak about their wives or girlfriends you will genuinely never want to go near a man again.
And another thing, if some men want to know why some women have such high standards its because they have went through the creepiness and perverted behavior by men they don't even know as a young girl so many times, they naturally think all men are like that. So maybe if certain boys and men change how they speak, act and present themselves the standards will lower. But until that changes, more and more women and girls will continue to rise their standards.
Now, I will not sit behind a screen and absolutely slander men because its not all men and don't even lie, we both know its not all men. But it is enough men for women and girls to be afraid of going near them. And from my point of view, my friends are constantly chasing boys and not to sound like a pick me, but I don't. I genuinely don't bother chasing boys because most of them act the same. The way they speak about girls etc. I personally have high standards because of what kind of behaviour I've seen from so many men at a young age.
I think it's important to spread awareness about this. And please nobody say 'it's just what men do'. No. I firmly refuse to believe its just what they do and if there were a set of words to describe what they do they would be "Utterly Desperate". If you feel the need to stare at other girls while you have a girlfriend?? Its ungrateful and desperate. Ungrateful because you don't realise what you have, and forgive me for saying this, but some boys have a set standard for what they look for in girls during their teenage years and they usually are skinny, 4'11, size D chest, no waist, no belly fat, no stretch marks and a huge butt so 9 times out of 10 that's what their girlfriend will be. So yeah, they don't appreciate their girlfriend enough and it's desperate because what makes you feel like staring at other girls?? To see if she's pretty? Most likely. Are you that desperate to see other pretty girls. It also works the same if he looks at girls on Instagram etc. If he's looking at these unrealistic Instagram models, it's desperate.
I also don't understand how some girls let their boyfriends watch porn. It really dosent compute in my head. It's not realistic. It litterally sets unrealistic standards for how you should look, act etc during the devils tango. I hope one day people realise how bad it is for you. Realise that's not what the female body looks like, nothing in it is realistic, and the actors are so dramatic. Some of them are litterally screaming?. Once again not realistic. Society needs to change how they view women. Its disgusting.
Also for the boys reading this, feel free to comment about your experiences with strange women in public. I think people forget this happens to boys too.
I ask you to not attack me. I just want people to listen to me and become aware of these situations. Stay safe out there and have a lovely day.

In England. Hi there, I’m at a bit of a loss as to what to do. I’m autistic and I hate confrontation. The mere thought of it makes me want to shrivel up and hide but I’m in a situation where it’s unavoidable.
I’m going to try and explain this situation as well as I can but I’m really angry and upset so I apologise if anything is unclear. Apologies, this post is going to be quite long.
Basically, I live in a houseshare with two other people. Our tenancy ends on 19th July. One of my housemates moved out today because she decided to go travelling for at least 3 months, meaning she won’t be here for the end of the tenancy. She has had this planned for at least 6 months.
I began to worry a few weeks ago when I noticed that she hadn’t started organising or packing for her move at all. Baring in mind, she has 2 full rooms in this house with loads of stuff that belongs to her. She didn’t start packing until 1 week ago and even then, she only did 2 half days worth and has spent the rest of the time working, getting drunk and going to festivals.
Today she moved out and she has left A LOT of stuff. Like, big pieces of furniture like tables and armchairs etc. She also left everything absolutely filthy. Like, actual dirt everywhere including used cat litter from HER cats. Just describing it doesn’t justify just how awful it is!!
We asked her via messenger what she planned on doing regarding the rest of her stuff and cleaning and she got angry with us and said “I’m not even out of the country yet, you need to pipe down”. No apology for leaving it the way she has. My other housemate and I both have chronic anxiety and we worry about not getting our deposits back for the house and now she has made it 10x harder for us.
Talking to friends and family, I think we need to give her the ultimatum of “sort this out or we’ll throw your stuff away” but I am so so scared of her reaction.
Others have suggested giving her a time period and if she doesn’t send anyone to remove her stuff, we will throw it away. Is this legal? Also, should we let the landlord know about this? She’s on the tenancy.
I don’t know what to do. I’m so angry and upset 😞

I’m having this issue very recently where my cat keeps pooping outside of the litter box. Pooping only, she still pees in it.
It has only happened very recently, she’s never done this before. My partner and I took a 2 1/2 day trip this past weekend. We didn’t get a petsitter for the cats since it was so short. We left them with lights on and tons of food and water… when we came back we saw she’d gone twice in one room (but there was also some in her box too though so she did still use it at some point while we were gone). I figured this was because of distress of us being gone and no sitter, and maybe because her box went unscooped for 2 nights. (i scoop it every night otherwise).
But now we’re back home, she doesn’t seem traumatized in any way….but she’s gone on the carpet again. She had full access to her litter box, but chose to poop on the carpet. I really really dont want this to become a thing.
I’m going to do a deep clean of her box tonight in case maybe she’s finding it smelly or something. Like I said I scoop everyday but it’s been ~3 weeks since a full clean. So I’ll try that.
But I’m wondering what sorts of tactics I can take in addition to that to encourage her to use her litter box?

My cat (male, almost 2) had the surgery yesterday, I picked him up today with some medication and a cone
The incision on his belly doesn't seem to have stitches, is the cone necessary?
I'm asking because he's been hurting himself while trying to jump and bumping into things, he can't even drink water or eat. I've limited him to my room for now with his litter box and several beds and everything he needs. But I'm scared when I'm away he'll jump from the bed or my desk and hurt himself in process. The cone is making it so hard for him to walk normally
I saw some pics of people reversing the cone, instead of it going from neck to head, it goes from neck to chest, do you think that's a better solution?
Should I limit him to a smaller place when I'm away like a bathroom only? The bathroom is SO tiny and I am away from home from 8 am till 5 am
Please I'm desperate for help, I took three days off and I go back to work on Friday, I don't want to leave him knowing he might accidentally hurt himself

she’s the sweetest most baby cat i’ve ever interacted with! in her adoption info it did say she likes to “talk”, but it’s so much! all the time, meowing and then we go see what she wants and its nothing!!! I’m worried it’s something more :( food bowl is always full, water too and litter is consistently cleaned out.

I managed to get everybody triggered in this subreddit but i want more, i am the biggest menace, i am toxic ASF so y'all Better ban me otherwise i Will keep defending finasteride and dutasteride and you guys are going to become even more triggered and jealous, i can feel your envy and i LOVE THIS SHIT! some of y'all (not everyone) are a bunch of Hypocondriacs and conspiracy theorists Who spread fear on finasteride and dutasteride because you don't want everybody else to use It! You envy us. WE WILL KEEP OUR HAIR FOREVER BEVAUSE WE ARE NOT SCARED OF 5AR INHIBITORS and you Will be slapheads 🤣🤣.
WHY YOU PEOPLE ARE MORE TOXIC THAN ME: Most of the times ED problems are psycosomatic and not physiological. SO YOU ARE HURTING PEOPLE BY SPREADING FEAR, thanks to you a lot of people are going to avoid finasteride and loose theyr hair or even take the drug and experience the nocebo effect. you have no proof to Say that the 1% incidence or 2% incidence Is fake, litterally you cant prove it untill you do a randomized controlled study in a double blind manner. How can you Say It Is fake? Just because you see a bunch of people talking SHIT about the drug online It does not prove anything, people Who have side effects are much more likely to create a post complaining about theyr experience while people Who have no sides are less likely to report It. And if Who TAKES the drug in not blinded and has Red your posts and comments in wich you spread fear we don't know how much of them are victim of the nocebo effect.
What the science says:
I don't even wanna argue from a scientific standpoint because the scientific literature Is very clear: finasteride and dutasteride are both extremely safe and effective with a low incidicence of side effects. The studies Were peer reviewed, double blided randomized and controlled, (to eliminate the risk of manipulation and Bias) and only a part of it was conducted by Merk, the others are conducted by A lot of different unbiased research teams from all over the world, and yet you don't believe them. (Y'all are conspiracy theorists, y'all are retards)
Studies on the nocebo effect (regarding specifically finasteride) demonstrated thet people Who Were informed about the sides before taking finasteride are 400% more likely to report side effects compared to people Who Just take the pill and don't worry about it
Studies demonstrated that when the patients and the researchers are blinded the incidence of side effects Is very similar: 1.3% of people Who take a placebo (control group) reported Sexual side effects while 1.8% of people Who take the actual drug (experimental group) reported Sexual side effects
You are so toxic that some people on this sub didnt even believe that i had zero side effects from using finasteride for 2 years straight and then switched to dutasteride. A looser challeged me to send him a hard cock picture with my username and the dutasteride box and i accepted the challenge (his idea). Now he banned me and he Is cryng in the bathroom. How can you think that this drugs have a 100% incidence of side effects? You are retarded.

Prologue
As the end of autumn approached, the chill of morning and evening began to cut through like a hunting knife. Through the tanker's windshield, the driver could see a woman wearing a knitted scarf and a blanket on her shoulders. She had sat down in the middle of the road and was howling long and heart-wrenching like a lament. Passers-by looked at her with horror, surprise, or contempt. When a lady in a fur coat approached her to inquire, the unfortunate woman began to roll on the ground, thrashing about like a rolling log heading down the valley, and screaming with even greater force and deeper sorrow, so loud that it could be heard all the way to the shire, after which she stopped in a sob, crying quietly like the water of a lowland spring. She was Uncle Jim's eldest daughter.
Part I
Mr. and Mrs. Axelton were two retirees with charitable souls. They had the sign of charity burning on the soles of their dusty, second-hand shoes, laced up with shoelaces they got from the thrift store. They brought a bag of beans for the dog, bananas for the children, bread, bologna, and mustard for the homeless - lost souls from the outskirts of the city. They entered the basement of an abandoned building through labyrinthine paths surrounded by plywood and wrought iron fences. The building was marked with a red dot.
Around an improvised brick stove, illegally connected to the neighbourhood’s electricity network, sat Uncle Jim, Melissa, the children, and Baxter, opening cans of food received from a philanthropic organization. Baxter was a small mongrel with blue-blooded hunting dog lineage, who always hovered around Jim and helped him beg. Mrs. Axelton felt more compassion for the dog than for the family without a penny.
Jim spent his days in front of the Metropolitan Cathedral with Googie Gums, Mr. Blondey, Fane Fairfax, and Tane Cuthbert. They lived as best they could. On the drier days, they humbly lined up behind the priests, praying for them to give them something from the charity box. In the evenings, they opened a cheap two-litter bottle of beer, played backgammon, talked about the fate of the country, football, and the apocalypse.
One spring afternoon, a benevolent gentleman took Jim aside, treated him royally, and offered him an impossible-to-refuse deal. He handed him two thousand five hundred lei in cash, for which all he had to do was sign some blank documents. At that time, it was a good sum of money. Jim thought that luck had fallen upon him like a huge wheel of cheese, so he immediately accepted, without hesitation. With the money, he bought new clothes for Melissa, notebooks for the children, food, and drink in abundance.
At the beginning of the summer, a conflict erupted with Mr. Axelton over such an absurd issue that it would make customers of the "Tancredi Kingsley Jr." brewery doubt the honesty of the storyteller. Mrs. Axelton, a sensitive and volunteer person, was involved in a campaign to save stray dogs who, without the dedication of people like her, would have ended up in miserable shelters on the outskirts of the city. Those who were up for adoption were taken off the streets, washed, vaccinated, and sent to their new owners.
Jane, a neighbour from the ghetto, had told Jim one evening while gossiping on the roadside that significant profits could be made from selling animals. Therefore, seeing the strange pensioner walking through the neighbourhood week after week taking care of stray dogs, the idea arose in his mind that these actions could only have mercantile and hidden purposes, from which he was unfairly excluded from sharing the profits.
Despite Axelton's explanation, treating him to a sausage roll and a coffee from the vending machine, Jim remained unchanged in his opinions, considering his neighbour guilty of greed. When he saw him coming out of the building or on his way to the grocery store, he shouted at him from the other side of the street to demand an explanation and followed him grumpily like an unhappy landlord who had not been paid rent for a long time. He had become a real nuisance on the head of our unfortunate citizen, who now found himself forced to make unimaginable detours from the exit of the building to the bus station just to avoid the annoying neighbour with whom he did not want to continue the confrontation.
Part II
Fortunately, an unexpected twist of fate spared Mr. Axelton from a steep climb up the confrontation ladder when Jim was unexpectedly summoned to the station by a local police officer. It turns out he had signed a mortgage without any collateral which he had no chance of repaying in this lifetime. He was charged with fraud and sent to the White Gate prison for five years. No one visited him. When he was released, after two and a half years of serving, he limped and had only a few teeth left in his mouth. It was as if he had aged ten years.
Meanwhile, Melissa had coupled up with Fane and had a child with him. They moved together to the Hopeless Heights, a neighbourhood built specifically for needy people, and Jim's children were sent to an orphanage. Baxter was taken in by a kind-hearted nobleman who loved animals and owned a seafood restaurant, entrusting him to a mute maid who walked him around the blocks three times a day. Sometimes, on summer days, dressed in a bathrobe and a pair of flip-flops, Sir. Hatchet Jenkins would come out with two other small dogs as big as cats who walked swaying like wind-up toys. He walked the streets like a traveling circus performer, but if anyone dared to mock him, he became so furious that he turned into a steam boiler, blowing heat through his nostrils and obscenities at his enemy, threatening to punch them, showing them the cane he would strike his heels with.
Uncle Jim first moved in front of St. Nicholas Church, where Father Murphy O'Malley served. He was a small man, always carrying a leather briefcase like a spy movie security agent, had a carefully groomed moustache, a gold watch and ring, and patent leather shoes. Everyone said he had the gift. He came to church in a luxury car. When he opened the door, he was greeted by a multitude of beggars, some of whom had come from neighbouring quarters, trying to kiss his hand and ask for coins. Jim didn't last long there, the competition was too high.
Lately, he had been experiencing more frequent headaches. He walked with a cane down the narrow street, swaying in the wind like a turnip pulled from the ground. I didn't think he would last much longer, but Uncle Jim had a survival instinct that most mortals lack. He stopped first at Mr. Axelton's, with whom he had made amends in the meantime, and asked for a pair of boots for the snowy weather and a packet of aspirin for his headache. He found an old fur hat with ears that had been thrown away and drank a cup of mulled wine, given as charity for the souls of the dead. Then, he found shelter in a cave under the ruins of an abandoned manor.
In the morning, he emerged from the ground like a contemporary Lazarus and sat next to the all-night convenience store near the Agriculture Department. On his way out, the kindest customers would always leave him something: a roll, a coin with the king's face on it, half a salami stick, a pair of socks, a cube of melted cheese, or a bottle of curdled milk. He had a yellow plastic bag in which he loaded all of his products. In the evening, when he returned to his lair, it was always full of wonders.
Epilogue
When spring arrived, Jim began to bloom like snowdrops. His teeth grew anew, made of copper, his hair turned green like grass, his eyes started to distinguish details with the precision of an eagle, his skin became as smooth as that of young boys, his arms became steel, his forehead raised, his thoughts became clear, and his vision became as clear as that of great wise men. It was rumoured that he was making so much money that he could move to a hotel. The last time I saw him was on a foggy April morning. He got into a taxi and disappeared into the smoke of history.