Crown clipart

Posted here on request
Fine, I'll write up the story. But you're also gonna have to read a bunch of backstory. I kind of chaptered it so skip to the coin part or the SMA part if you just want that. Most of it is about my first couple months at fort bliss and my time with the afgani refugees.
I just got back from the hospital and am procrastinating summoning the energy to go to the gym and lift things. So instead I'll exercise my memory and tell the story of why I started cutting up wood and making PFC coins and why I'm still doing it today.
I arrived at my first duty station of Fort Bliss in 2021 in July. A few days after I showed up I was put directly on ammo guard duty at Mcgregor, 24 hours on 24 hours off. I was supposed to be there for a week but the unit that was to relieve us never showed up. So I was there for two weeks. Finally got off that detail with far too many pictures of tarantulas that tried to start beef like I wasn't gonna lose instantly.
3 days at the company I went to the range for a week. Got back. A week passed and I finally did my first Monday runday after a month at my unit, 5 miles racing my PSG to obtain the title of fastest in the company. I won, but couldnt walk right for days, he was fine. He won. Then Friday the situation with Afghanistan happened. We were supposed to go to korea in a few months. The refugees were coming to el paso. My first conversation with my first sergeant was me demanding to be put on the detail, I didn't know anything about it. I said I do not care if I am filling sandbags I want to be there before they even arrive. I honestly do not remember why I was so passionate about it. But it didn't matter, my unit was assigned the job. Exclusively. I had started dating someone and it was going well, then we started our shifts. 12 hours on, 12 hours off. With a 45 minute bus ride there every day. Most went to set up the covid testing site, I was put on the covid quarantine site.
The first few days were just preparing for them to arrive, we were excited and scared. I'm from south Carolina and never met anyone who didn't speak English or Spanish. I was excited. I refused any days off for the first two weeks. My budding relationship died about three days in lol. Such is life.
OPERATION ALLIES WELCOME: Before the afganis even landed I wanted to be able to provide things I didn't believe the army would (for some reason I lacked trust) and started calling businesses all over el paso. I'd determine something I wanted, then call up businesses and ask if they had any extra. I got yoga mats for prayer rugs the first day from yoga studios. The second day I went after diapers, clothes, and toys. I collected about 300 diapers, 21 mats, and a mishmash of baby clothes before being ordered to stop by my commander. I waited until the unit had their own system for taking in donations and turned them all in.
Only one person ever tested positive for my entire time on that part. A wild man we named Bashir because he would only accept the food we brought him if he had three milks, 4 teas, 3 jellies. He didn't know any English so he would put horns on his head and say "Bashir Bashir Bashir" when we didn't bring him enough. We googled it and it actually meant goat but close enough. I have stories about this man that are amazing but I'm not about to tell them, cuz he does not represent the guests to me even if it was the first person we'd met.
Because there was nothing for us to do, we got assigned the job of carpentry. We came onto the site to PILES of planks and tools. Absolutely genius idea honestly. Took 3 days before they turned quarantine into builder bobs covid show. We built little work tables and spent 12 hours of night shift making so many things. Laundry lines, soccer goals, benches, privacy dividers for the tents, you name it. Actually I just did, that's pretty much it. I still have a huge scacallous on my palm from 4 million spliters going into that one spot I was digging out with a knife for months. I loved it, I was miserable, I stank, I hurted, but I just refused to take any breaks because I have no clue why honestly. Ego? It was the literal first time in my life I'd experienced genuine hard labor and hard work. I was addicted.
After a week the brass started getting helicoptered in to get tours by the huddles of officers telling them about all the great work they'd done and leading away from the things that they didn't want them to see. We were the first thing they passed on the way into the site. I learned to guess the number of stars by the number of helicopters landing at once. This major who would show up a couple hours before day shift, would always try and get us to work extra hard when the wigs of big would walk by. I remember him asking me to move the entire working site around the one building we hid from the sun behind, because he wanted them to see us. Rather than do that I dragged an already completed laundry line stand right into the open, grabbed a notebook and a tape measure and pretended to take measurements from it while wearing my eyepro and gloves we never wore. Like the fuckin tape measure was going to thwip back and measure the inside of both my eye sockets. Just for the 40 seconds this general was parading by, literally never looking at us as I watched this major run into the swarm and point at me.
Every day we got the same speech from the high rank officers from our unit who we would watch drive up for the duration of the star parade hours, then come up to us and say "you guys have been doing a kickass job, really knocking it out of the park" then hop back in the 4×4 and drive back home for the day.
Then we got moved from our little wood safe haven as the Combat engineers stole it from us. And were put into the security points (SPs) with the population of guests. Thus began the most infuriating and amazing time of my life.
The kids, the fucking kids. The absolute agony of the day and the memories I hold the closest to my heart. If you had an energy drink they'd come up take a sip and put it back where they found it. I'm still convinced I caught dysentery from one of them, and had to mop up shit I sprayed across my room when i woke up in an absolute panic sprint to the bathroom. Also when I found out I had gained a roommate. Great meeting. Couldn't leave bed for days. Spent the first day at the camp laying on the ground in the sun and sand too dizzy to even move going in and out of consciousness. Having officers and ncos come up about to yell at me before being told "woah woah woah he's fucked up" and me trying to get up til they saw my face and all said "Jesus fuck lay back down." Also a kid stole my sunglasses from my pocket while I was asleep. The kids made me determine two things, I do not want a son. And I absolutely want a daughter some day. I tear up talking about one kid who I absolutely loved. Omar, who was the hustliest of hustlers. He would sit in the defac line that was always a mile long, get almost to the front and walk back 20 spots and ask for 2 dollars for his spot. Then he'd do it again and again and come up and show me his money. I loved this kid. I bought him a PC and got his name sewn on it and awarded him the hat and a coin (which I'll get to in a sec). He wore that shit every single day. We taught him to march, commands, gave him ranks to wear but he only ever wanted to be a PFC like me and his other soldier brothers. He was with me there every single day til he left. He hugged me and cried so long i fell asleep three times.
The Nametape
The inside because I knew he'd get chased by soldiers thinking he stole someones.
We got moved to the store front, where the donations would be given out to guests who waited in the longest line on this planet. This was the crowning jewel of the camp so all the brass would come. Endlessly. and thus the battalion commander and the ambitious officers were always there during the day. Daily "you're doing a kickass job out here, really knocking out of the park guys"
LINES: holy heck the lines. Lines there were the absolute enemy of the guests and the soldiers. Cutting was just normal for them and the greatest sin on this planet to leaders. I was called so many names by officers and ranks because I wouldn't yell at them. Then I just started to do it, I learned how to flip the ol DS switch and became the problem solver for our team. They'd just point and I'd get them out.
I did not like this, so I did the natural thing: I sought out an English teacher. I found him literally the next day I decided to. It was absolutely wild. He came to the store when it was closed and we talked while I told him it was closed. I learned he was a English professor with his own school in Kabul. I offered to get him little things he needed, like a jacket from walmart, a phone charger, just small stuff. And also prepare him for American culture. I had two friends in the camp, including him that were similar ages to me, and they mostly wanted to know how to date, and how to specifically date white women. In exchange he reversed his lesson plan and gave me an hour long lesson every day in farsi. I had a notebook of notes and the alphabet and practiced constantly. I become the translator. Point at them in the line and I'd step in and actually figure out what the problem was. I didn't get conversational but I could ALLMOST read. It felt like my brain was melting. They always laughed at my accent.
WHY THE COINS: I decided I absolutely despised officers. I'd literally only seen them in the most high visibility locations at the camp. We seemed to be the A-team apparently, always moved right when the next big thing opened. We would work and freeze almost to death or sweat to death and heard about our asskicking and parks constantly. But we were told we aren't getting any award for the 6 months we spent there, without any breaks. A day off every week, or every couple days, every 2 days. It changed weekly. I had sunburnt eyeballs several times. The amount of suicides was never mentioned, not a single one was given a wake. I had several NCOS begin divorce proceedings because of the hours they put in because they had to. Every month told we were gonna be replaced gonna be replaced gonna be replaced by another unit. Never happened. Our unit refused to pass it on because they wanted the promotion and full praise. When I arrived, reception was the closest thing I had experienced to fort blisses unit til 2022. CSM Williams came up and said "people first" and I legitimately believed him. On the camp they did not do a single thing for the mental health of the soldiers during the time. So many awful stories I won't say here.
We did a lot of good, I loved being there. Putting in the long hours and basically living there. My barrack room really felt like a middle man to the bus and the bus again because I never remembered ever actually being in it.
FINALLY GODDAMN THE COIN PART, YOU JUST WANTED TO GUSH ABOUT THE CAMP.
I hated officers and their goofy cheer up chants, and I wanted to do literally anything. So I decided to make coins. The brass in my unit would just walk around to the parts they knew the big boys were going to see, so I wanted to originally get river rocks and engrave them beautifully and give them to them. Just too big to put into their pants pocket so only their cargo pocket. Where as they walked they'd give them belt rash on the other side and scrape their legs as it moved in their pocket.
Obviously I chose wood instead cuz rocks expensive. I designed the PFC coin by sending my brother shitty doodles and Clipart and asking him to put it together in Gimp.
Other side The doodle
Called up a woodshop in town and asked him for advice. That man is now a really great friend of mine, have helped each other on all kinds of wierd tasks. I bought a plank of wood that he recommended, soft maple. Cut it at the new wood shop on camp, and got it engraved the next day. I made 15 of these things.
One side Another side
They are heavy, wide, and I sanded the sides with a rock to give them a mild edge. You can't fit them in your pocket, only the cargo and only sideways. While they walk around they are gonna get home with a red rash on their thigh. I know, because I fuckin had one every day cuz I kept one in the holster at all time. Karma irony whatever
Me and my friends thought they'd get angry and understand the instant insult of a PFC giving them a coin. I gave it to a W03 at first and he loved it. Same speech every time.
"Youre doing a kickass job out here, really knocking it out of the park, and I want to bestow upon you the highest honor I can...the Coveted PFC Coin "
Mildly offended, I gave it to another officer, a captain
"Youre doing a kickass job out here, really knocking it out of the park, and I want to bestow upon you the highest honor I can...the Coveted PFC Coin"
He loved it too.
So then I just went hog wild. Daring myself to give it to higher and higher ranks. At our SPs around the store we had radios given to us literally judt to tell each other and the officers inside the tent when someone with a rank came onto the site so we could all shape up. So I just used that same system. When I heard the call, I'd quickly run around and grab privates and get a herde. Figure out where they were and where they were going and cut them off.
LTCs and colonels turning corners and finding themselves in the middle of a semicircle of privates. I'd step out and say that beautiful speech. Offer my hand never break eye contact and slap that big hunk of wood into theirs.
I gave them to CSMs, birds, offered it to a 2 star who said no with disgust, gave it to a British General. Big ranks didn't scare me, they were exciting. And I terrified my leaders because they couldn't say anything about it because they all loved it. None of them knowing it was my personal, planned out, middle finger. My friends on the SPs fucking loved the coin prank. The best part was that I never changed the speech. And I always did it. I didn't care if the man walking the Colonel was a Colonel I gave one to yesterday. That was my favorite situation
British General. I got told he was leaving the site and literally sprinted like a quarter mile into the desert after him and yelled HEY!
MY BATTALION COMMANDER
I awarded one to my battalion commander, had to ask my CSM who took a look at it and laughed.
"What is OEW?"
"Uh CSM, that's our operation right?"
"Nope it's OAW, Operation Allies welcome, anyways I'll get the commander" and disappeared into his office. I shatted my pants. I immediately started thinking about sharpie-ing it which wouldn't work. Then I thought "change the acronym"
I got the first two words and my buddy came up with the last one like an angel
Seconds later I awarded it to him in front of a crowd of everyone CSM gathered and the BC smugly said "I'll make sure to cherish my oEEw coin" so I said "um actually sir, that stands for Operation Enlisted Woodshop" "YOU PLANNED THAT?" "Of course sir it's my coin."
Fast forward changing the coins to represent the new name of the operation. Handing them out like candy, making more in my spare time.
SMA GRINSTON
The SMA was coming. And on my day off. I immediately started getting teased "gonna give him one too Bud?"
Yup
Came in on my day off, got a copy of his schedule for the day....somehow. Decided on a tent he would definitely be at and I'd definitely be able to get to him. He was having dinner and a conversation with soldiers from each battalion of my brigade. I wasn't picked ofc. But that day there was 60mph winds and a dust storm. The shoddy doors of the wedding tents we used didn't latch so when the wind came they were always getting thrown around. For this dinner they had a guy sat there holding the door shut and the sand outside the entire day.
I went up to him and told him that he was relived and needed in the store tent and took his spot. Of course he absolutely never came back. Perfection. I sat there holding that door all day through the wind and sand. I actually cut my cornea on a piece of sand and spent the day with one eye shut. Wouldn't leave my door. Shift changed and a guy came to relieve me, I just said nah I got it go away.
CSMs started wandering around the area scouting out the tent making sure everyone was good for his arrival. By this point all of them knew me and knew exactly why I was on that door. I got so many "sooo pfc, what are you planning." I had my brigade CSM directly and immediately warn me "do not fucking do it." I stayed on my door, sad. I got relieved and pulled into another tent to meet my battalion ops CSM. He gave me a coin and said "good luck, you got this."
All the damn support I needed. Went right back out and took my door. When he came by and went into the tent, it wasn't my time. I held the door shut literally with every muscle i had. While time trying to fight with my notebook and practice reading farsi off the sign to pass the time. Pages got ripped such is life. Random major started talking to me about my notes and took a picture of what i thought was my notebook for later. Nah he took the most gremlin photo of me possible with me hunched over holding the notebook out and the door shut and put it on the 2nd BDE page. He was a PAO.
FINALLY the dinner ended. SMA gave a coin to everyone in the tent and came out and went straight to me surrounded in a pool of CSMs and said
"they told me I had to give a coin to the door guy too"
And slapped a coin into my hand. I kept the grip and said
"That's crazy SGM because I have something for you too, and slapped one into his other hand.
"What the fuck is this?"
"That's the Coveted PFC coin SGM"
"I will Covet this"
And disappeared into his herde and left.
I saw my BDE CSM staring at me and I fucking immediately full tilt sprinted to my car and left. Avoided him like the plague the rest of OAW.
THATS IT. That's the whole story. All that buildup backstory and especially a full day's work on my day off, having a fucked up eye for 2 days. All for a 4 second prank. It's a dumb story. It's why I left all that OAW on there. That was a fun moment. But it's so attached to the amazing and life changing time that mission was for me. I really felt like I had become someone different and given tools to become someone different.
After that I didnt care about the coins cuz like, where else was there to go. The prank was done. I won.
Then I started doing the bone marrow drive, and the story for that is my first post. I started making SPC coins, and at first they were just to be given to the captains of the companies at each battalion I spoke to. That was too expensive and they had become something a bit more special to me. They reminded me of that prank, and still do. But now I give them to officers and ncos who genuinely care and do things that make my job running these drives easier. Going against the impression I had before when I first got into the real army.
The coins
Bone marrow coin doodle
The current coins, along with the typo
Other side

Fine, I'll write up the story. But you're also gonna have to read a bunch of backstory. I kind of chaptered it so skip to the coin part or the SMA part if you just want that. Most of it is about my first couple months at fort bliss and my time with the afgani refugees.
I just got back from the hospital and am procrastinating summoning the energy to go to the gym and lift things. So instead I'll exercise my memory and tell the story of why I started cutting up wood and making PFC coins and why I'm still doing it today.
I arrived at my first duty station of Fort Bliss in 2021 in July. A few days after I showed up I was put directly on ammo guard duty at Mcgregor, 24 hours on 24 hours off. I was supposed to be there for a week but the unit that was to relieve us never showed up. So I was there for two weeks. Finally got off that detail with far too many pictures of tarantulas that tried to start beef like I wasn't gonna lose instantly.
3 days at the company I went to the range for a week. Got back. A week passed and I finally did my first Monday runday after a month at my unit, 5 miles racing my PSG to obtain the title of fastest in the company. I won, but couldnt walk right for days, he was fine. He won. Then Friday the situation with Afghanistan happened. We were supposed to go to korea in a few months. The refugees were coming to el paso. My first conversation with my first sergeant was me demanding to be put on the detail, I didn't know anything about it. I said I do not care if I am filling sandbags I want to be there before they even arrive. I honestly do not remember why I was so passionate about it. But it didn't matter, my unit was assigned the job. Exclusively. I had started dating someone and it was going well, then we started our shifts. 12 hours on, 12 hours off. With a 45 minute bus ride there every day. Most went to set up the covid testing site, I was put on the covid quarantine site.
The first few days were just preparing for them to arrive, we were excited and scared. I'm from south Carolina and never met anyone who didn't speak English or Spanish. I was excited. I refused any days off for the first two weeks. My budding relationship died about three days in lol. Such is life.
OPERATION ALLIES WELCOME: Before the afganis even landed I wanted to be able to provide things I didn't believe the army would (for some reason I lacked trust) and started calling businesses all over el paso. I'd determine something I wanted, then call up businesses and ask if they had any extra. I got yoga mats for prayer rugs the first day from yoga studios. The second day I went after diapers, clothes, and toys. I collected about 300 diapers, 21 mats, and a mishmash of baby clothes before being ordered to stop by my commander. I waited until the unit had their own system for taking in donations and turned them all in.
Only one person ever tested positive for my entire time on that part. A wild man we named Bashir because he would only accept the food we brought him if he had three milks, 4 teas, 3 jellies. He didn't know any English so he would put horns on his head and say "Bashir Bashir Bashir" when we didn't bring him enough. We googled it and it actually meant goat but close enough. I have stories about this man that are amazing but I'm not about to tell them, cuz he does not represent the guests to me even if it was the first person we'd met.
Because there was nothing for us to do, we got assigned the job of carpentry. We came onto the site to PILES of planks and tools. Absolutely genius idea honestly. Took 3 days before they turned quarantine into builder bobs covid show. We built little work tables and spent 12 hours of night shift making so many things. Laundry lines, soccer goals, benches, privacy dividers for the tents, you name it. Actually I just did, that's pretty much it. I still have a huge scacallous on my palm from 4 million spliters going into that one spot I was digging out with a knife for months. I loved it, I was miserable, I stank, I hurted, but I just refused to take any breaks because I have no clue why honestly. Ego? It was the literal first time in my life I'd experienced genuine hard labor and hard work. I was addicted.
After a week the brass started getting helicoptered in to get tours by the huddles of officers telling them about all the great work they'd done and leading away from the things that they didn't want them to see. We were the first thing they passed on the way into the site. I learned to guess the number of stars by the number of helicopters landing at once. This major who would show up a couple hours before day shift, would always try and get us to work extra hard when the wigs of big would walk by. I remember him asking me to move the entire working site around the one building we hid from the sun behind, because he wanted them to see us. Rather than do that I dragged an already completed laundry line stand right into the open, grabbed a notebook and a tape measure and pretended to take measurements from it while wearing my eyepro and gloves we never wore. Like the fuckin tape measure was going to thwip back and measure the inside of both my eye sockets. Just for the 40 seconds this general was parading by, literally never looking at us as I watched this major run into the swarm and point at me.
Every day we got the same speech from the high rank officers from our unit who we would watch drive up for the duration of the star parade hours, then come up to us and say "you guys have been doing a kickass job, really knocking it out of the park" then hop back in the 4×4 and drive back home for the day.
Then we got moved from our little wood safe haven as the Combat engineers stole it from us. And were put into the security points (SPs) with the population of guests. Thus began the most infuriating and amazing time of my life.
The kids, the fucking kids. The absolute agony of the day and the memories I hold the closest to my heart. If you had an energy drink they'd come up take a sip and put it back where they found it. I'm still convinced I caught dysentery from one of them, and had to mop up shit I sprayed across my room when i woke up in an absolute panic sprint to the bathroom. Also when I found out I had gained a roommate. Great meeting. Couldn't leave bed for days. Spent the first day at the camp laying on the ground in the sun and sand too dizzy to even move going in and out of consciousness. Having officers and ncos come up about to yell at me before being told "woah woah woah he's fucked up" and me trying to get up til they saw my face and all said "Jesus fuck lay back down." Also a kid stole my sunglasses from my pocket while I was asleep. The kids made me determine two things, I do not want a son. And I absolutely want a daughter some day. I tear up talking about one kid who I absolutely loved. Omar, who was the hustliest of hustlers. He would sit in the defac line that was always a mile long, get almost to the front and walk back 20 spots and ask for 2 dollars for his spot. Then he'd do it again and again and come up and show me his money. I loved this kid. I bought him a PC and got his name sewn on it and awarded him the hat and a coin (which I'll get to in a sec). He wore that shit every single day. We taught him to march, commands, gave him ranks to wear but he only ever wanted to be a PFC like me and his other soldier brothers. He was with me there every single day til he left. He hugged me and cried so long i fell asleep three times.
The Nametape
The inside because I knew he'd get chased by soldiers thinking he stole someones.
We got moved to the store front, where the donations would be given out to guests who waited in the longest line on this planet. This was the crowning jewel of the camp so all the brass would come. Endlessly. and thus the battalion commander and the ambitious officers were always there during the day. Daily "you're doing a kickass job out here, really knocking out of the park guys"
LINES: holy heck the lines. Lines there were the absolute enemy of the guests and the soldiers. Cutting was just normal for them and the greatest sin on this planet to leaders. I was called so many names by officers and ranks because I wouldn't yell at them. Then I just started to do it, I learned how to flip the ol DS switch and became the problem solver for our team. They'd just point and I'd get them out.
I did not like this, so I did the natural thing: I sought out an English teacher. I found him literally the next day I decided to. It was absolutely wild. He came to the store when it was closed and we talked while I told him it was closed. I learned he was a English professor with his own school in Kabul. I offered to get him little things he needed, like a jacket from walmart, a phone charger, just small stuff. And also prepare him for American culture. I had two friends in the camp, including him that were similar ages to me, and they mostly wanted to know how to date, and how to specifically date white women. In exchange he reversed his lesson plan and gave me an hour long lesson every day in farsi. I had a notebook of notes and the alphabet and practiced constantly. I become the translator. Point at them in the line and I'd step in and actually figure out what the problem was. I didn't get conversational but I could ALLMOST read. It felt like my brain was melting. They always laughed at my accent.
WHY THE COINS: I decided I absolutely despised officers. I'd literally only seen them in the most high visibility locations at the camp. We seemed to be the A-team apparently, always moved right when the next big thing opened. We would work and freeze almost to death or sweat to death and heard about our asskicking and parks constantly. But we were told we aren't getting any award for the 6 months we spent there, without any breaks. A day off every week, or every couple days, every 2 days. It changed weekly. I had sunburnt eyeballs several times. The amount of suicides was never mentioned, not a single one was given a wake. I had several NCOS begin divorce proceedings because of the hours they put in because they had to. Every month told we were gonna be replaced gonna be replaced gonna be replaced by another unit. Never happened. Our unit refused to pass it on because they wanted the promotion and full praise. When I arrived, reception was the closest thing I had experienced to fort blisses unit til 2022. CSM Williams came up and said "people first" and I legitimately believed him. On the camp they did not do a single thing for the mental health of the soldiers during the time. So many awful stories I won't say here.
We did a lot of good, I loved being there. Putting in the long hours and basically living there. My barrack room really felt like a middle man to the bus and the bus again because I never remembered ever actually being in it.
FINALLY GODDAMN THE COIN PART, YOU JUST WANTED TO GUSH ABOUT THE CAMP.
I hated officers and their goofy cheer up chants, and I wanted to do literally anything. So I decided to make coins. The brass in my unit would just walk around to the parts they knew the big boys were going to see, so I wanted to originally get river rocks and engrave them beautifully and give them to them. Just too big to put into their pants pocket so only their cargo pocket. Where as they walked they'd give them belt rash on the other side and scrape their legs as it moved in their pocket.
Obviously I chose wood instead cuz rocks expensive. I designed the PFC coin by sending my brother shitty doodles and Clipart and asking him to put it together in Gimp.
Other side The doodle
Called up a woodshop in town and asked him for advice. That man is now a really great friend of mine, have helped each other on all kinds of wierd tasks. I bought a plank of wood that he recommended, soft maple. Cut it at the new wood shop on camp, and got it engraved the next day. I made 15 of these things.
One side Another side
They are heavy, wide, and I sanded the sides with a rock to give them a mild edge. You can't fit them in your pocket, only the cargo and only sideways. While they walk around they are gonna get home with a red rash on their thigh. I know, because I fuckin had one every day cuz I kept one in the holster at all time. Karma irony whatever
Me and my friends thought they'd get angry and understand the instant insult of a PFC giving them a coin. I gave it to a W03 at first and he loved it. Same speech every time.
"Youre doing a kickass job out here, really knocking it out of the park, and I want to bestow upon you the highest honor I can...the Coveted PFC Coin "
Mildly offended, I gave it to another officer, a captain
"Youre doing a kickass job out here, really knocking it out of the park, and I want to bestow upon you the highest honor I can...the Coveted PFC Coin"
He loved it too.
So then I just went hog wild. Daring myself to give it to higher and higher ranks. At our SPs around the store we had radios given to us literally judt to tell each other and the officers inside the tent when someone with a rank came onto the site so we could all shape up. So I just used that same system. When I heard the call, I'd quickly run around and grab privates and get a herde. Figure out where they were and where they were going and cut them off.
LTCs and colonels turning corners and finding themselves in the middle of a semicircle of privates. I'd step out and say that beautiful speech. Offer my hand never break eye contact and slap that big hunk of wood into theirs.
I gave them to CSMs, birds, offered it to a 2 star who said no with disgust, gave it to a British General. Big ranks didn't scare me, they were exciting. And I terrified my leaders because they couldn't say anything about it because they all loved it. None of them knowing it was my personal, planned out, middle finger. My friends on the SPs fucking loved the coin prank. The best part was that I never changed the speech. And I always did it. I didn't care if the man walking the Colonel was a Colonel I gave one to yesterday. That was my favorite situation
British General. I got told he was leaving the site and literally sprinted like a quarter mile into the desert after him and yelled HEY!
MY BATTALION COMMANDER
I awarded one to my battalion commander, had to ask my CSM who took a look at it and laughed.
"What is OEW?"
"Uh CSM, that's our operation right?"
"Nope it's OAW, Operation Allies welcome, anyways I'll get the commander" and disappeared into his office. I shatted my pants. I immediately started thinking about sharpie-ing it which wouldn't work. Then I thought "change the acronym"
I got the first two words and my buddy came up with the last one like an angel
Seconds later I awarded it to him in front of a crowd of everyone CSM gathered and the BC smugly said "I'll make sure to cherish my oEEw coin" so I said "um actually sir, that stands for Operation Enlisted Woodshop" "YOU PLANNED THAT?" "Of course sir it's my coin."
Fast forward changing the coins to represent the new name of the operation. Handing them out like candy, making more in my spare time.
SMA GRINSTON
The SMA was coming. And on my day off. I immediately started getting teased "gonna give him one too Bud?"
Yup
Came in on my day off, got a copy of his schedule for the day....somehow. Decided on a tent he would definitely be at and I'd definitely be able to get to him. He was having dinner and a conversation with soldiers from each battalion of my brigade. I wasn't picked ofc. But that day there was 60mph winds and a dust storm. The shoddy doors of the wedding tents we used didn't latch so when the wind came they were always getting thrown around. For this dinner they had a guy sat there holding the door shut and the sand outside the entire day.
I went up to him and told him that he was relived and needed in the store tent and took his spot. Of course he absolutely never came back. Perfection. I sat there holding that door all day through the wind and sand. I actually cut my cornea on a piece of sand and spent the day with one eye shut. Wouldn't leave my door. Shift changed and a guy came to relieve me, I just said nah I got it go away.
CSMs started wandering around the area scouting out the tent making sure everyone was good for his arrival. By this point all of them knew me and knew exactly why I was on that door. I got so many "sooo pfc, what are you planning." I had my brigade CSM directly and immediately warn me "do not fucking do it." I stayed on my door, sad. I got relieved and pulled into another tent to meet my battalion ops CSM. He gave me a coin and said "good luck, you got this."
All the damn support I needed. Went right back out and took my door. When he came by and went into the tent, it wasn't my time. I held the door shut literally with every muscle i had. While time trying to fight with my notebook and practice reading farsi off the sign to pass the time. Pages got ripped such is life. Random major started talking to me about my notes and took a picture of what i thought was my notebook for later. Nah he took the most gremlin photo of me possible with me hunched over holding the notebook out and the door shut and put it on the 2nd BDE page. He was a PAO.
FINALLY the dinner ended. SMA gave a coin to everyone in the tent and came out and went straight to me surrounded in a pool of CSMs and said
"they told me I had to give a coin to the door guy too"
And slapped a coin into my hand. I kept the grip and said
"That's crazy SGM because I have something for you too, and slapped one into his other hand.
"What the fuck is this?"
"That's the Coveted PFC coin SGM"
"I will Covet this"
And disappeared into his herde and left.
I saw my BDE CSM staring at me and I fucking immediately full tilt sprinted to my car and left. Avoided him like the plague the rest of OAW.
THATS IT. That's the whole story. All that buildup backstory and especially a full day's work on my day off, having a fucked up eye for 2 days. All for a 4 second prank. It's a dumb story. It's why I left all that OAW on there. That was a fun moment. But it's so attached to the amazing and life changing time that mission was for me. I really felt like I had become someone different and given tools to become someone different.
After that I didnt care about the coins cuz like, where else was there to go. The prank was done. I won.
Then I started doing the bone marrow drive, and the story for that is my first post. I started making SPC coins, and at first they were just to be given to the captains of the companies at each battalion I spoke to. That was too expensive and they had become something a bit more special to me. They reminded me of that prank, and still do. But now I give them to officers and ncos who genuinely care and do things that make my job running these drives easier. Going against the impression I had before when I first got into the real army.
The coins
Bone marrow coin doodle
The current coins, along with the typo
Other side

Part 2 of games I kept. Which games are your favorites?
Games I sold: https://www.reddit.com/boardgames/comments/rddcmy/games_i_sold_and_why_i_sold_them_what_games_have/
Games I kept 50-26: https://www.reddit.com/boardgames/comments/rger5x/top_50_games_and_why_i_kept_them_part_1_which/
25) Alchemists WHY DID I BUY IT: Heavy deduction game.
PLAYS: 10+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: The deduction is unique and allows interaction through bluffing and is satisfying to get right.
The theme is delightful, with fun thematic explanations for mechanisms in the rulebook.
CRITICISM: I've had people who just do not understand how the deduction works.
The worker placement is not the draw of the game, and yet, some parts feel needlessly intricate.
I don't like apps.
24) Concordia WHY DID I BUY IT: Shut Up and Sit Down's infectious enthusiasm.
PLAYS: 20+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: By keeping the rules straightforward, it makes it accessible even to non-gamers. There's constant interaction with players having to pay more to build in other players' areas and being able to leech off other players' resource gathering actions.
Gaining more cards and occupying more areas gives a growing feeling of accomplishment. While at the beginning of the game you may struggle to generate a single resource, by the end you're drowning in them!
CRITICISM: It's a by-the-numbers Euro game, just done well.
23) Glorantha: The Gods War WHY DID I BUY IT: It's so weird. I love that one faction marries off their units to other factions. I love that one of the gods starts in hell and you have to negotiate to get him out. I love that there's a gender ambiguous archer with an arm for a head. It's also from one of my favorite designers.
PLAYS: 2
WHY DID I KEEP IT: Same reason as Gaia Project, it's similar enough to another game I love that it's almost like buying an expansion. The increased focus on negotiation puts and interesting spin on things and I like that the asymmetric powers are more involved.
Plus, there's some nice gender inclusivity, a rarity for these sort of games. There's monstrous women like The Mistress, Kyger Litor and The Mother of Monsters, a scarred woman in Sedenya, and even a genderfluid character with Androgeus.
Some won't like the breasts on display in some of the expansion content. I find it comes across quite naturally. It evokes a sense of uncanny valley with the attacking Maidstone Archer, as they're distinctly non-human, and a sense of power with the Earth Queen, standing naturally with a snake looped around her shoulders, ready to strike.
My girlfriend liked the designs, but didn't like that the Earth Queen is forced into political marriages, though she imagines her operating as the true ruler behind the scenes. She's a cool independent snake lady who deserves to frolic with her snakey friends all day long.
CRITICISM: The quirks to the system, the Chaos Rift and the Great Compromise, are interesting thematically, but are they interesting mechanically? Time will tell.
It took ages to arrive, even as far as Petersen Games Kickstarters go. The second Kickstarter is looking to be even worse delay-wise.
22) Giga-Robo! WHY DID I BUY IT: Anime! I researched the game and found it had been in development for years before the Kickstarter, indicating the creator had done their due diligence and wasn't just pushing out a half-baked idea.
PLAYS: 5+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: It approaches customization in a style I like. It doesn't bog you down with options from across multiple expansion sets; pilots and robots have a decent range of cards to select from, you select the ones that will best facilitate your strategy, or you can use the starter builds the game recommends. Despite the small-ish roster, the customization gives variety in the way your robot and pilot combination will play.
The table presentation evokes the feel of Junk Art or Santorini. Having physical buildings for the robots to hop on or destroy captures the eye and evokes a sense of physicality that other miniature board games lack, usually being limited to tiles.
It brings out my inner geek the same way Millennium Blades did, but this time round, I like the game behind the theme too.
CRITICISM: It was one of the longest Kickstarter waits I've ever had, due to the creator having issues getting all the art assets done and then difficulties in actually getting it shipped.
I'd usually say I mustn't run away, but the rulebook is distinctly not good, and I will run away from it to the BoardGameGeek forums any day.
21) Chicago Express WHY DID I BUY IT: I heard good things.
PLAYS: 10+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: It is good things. It has such a simple core game system with the action dials (not to mention a level of tactility that other games can lack), with a level of depth unexpected from its ease of play, thanks entirely to the stock market system. It's an odd feeling to develop your routes without fully owning any one thing. Every player inevitably ends up snared in each others' affairs, a complicated web of symbiotically ebbing out advantages wherever you can get them.
CRITICISM: It's simple to understand what you can do, yet every time I play I have to refresh myself on the rules.
20) Trickerion WHY DID I BUY IT: I always wanted to pull a bunny out of a hat, but stage magician animals often don't have the best lives, so I seeked to simulate it via board gaming instead.
PLAYS: 3
WHY DID I KEEP IT: It melds a bunch of different mechanisms I like: Paying salaries à la Food Chain Magnate, a delay between selecting your worker placement spot and executing the action à la Dominant Species, keeping your resources after building à la Mottainai and then the wonderfully symbiotic puzzle of performing tricks.
All nested within a theme that makes sense, alongside elicting a sense of child-like wonder, and that few other board games have used.
CRITICISM: I can't stop making fancy hand motions when I play this game, send help.
19) Santorini WHY DID I BUY IT: I like abstracts, I like player powers, I like games with good table presence.
PLAYS: 30+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: It's cute, it's quick and while it's not the deepest abstract, it makes up for it with the variety in the god powers. It also has fantastic table presence.
CRITICISM: Some powers, namely the instant-win ones, are frustrating to deal with.
Fitting everything in the box can be a challenge.
The white buildings of Santorini have an unfortunate past. The white was initially to reflect heat and then later fight a cholera epidemic (because the dictator at the time believed it would help), but in 1967, the white and blue paint jobs were enforced by military decree, to make the houses better resemble the Greek flag. Though thankfully, that decree has long passed and now the houses are kept that way by choice—to bring in tourists. (1)
1: https://greecetravelideas.com/greece-white-houses/
18) Puzzle Strike WHY DID I BUY IT: I wanted a deckbuilder with more punch.
PLAYS: 50+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: I'm still not sure I'm playing well after fifty plays. Mark of a good game! Usually in a fixed market deckbuilder, you'll figure out what combination of cards to go for at the start of the game. That's not untrue here, but starting with three character chips already pointing you towards a certain strategy adds a quirk you also have to take into consideration. In addition, the interactivity often means you'll have to make tactical decisions on what chips to pick up in order to guard yourself.
CRITICISM: The chips are unique, but cards are easier to handle and store.
Anime-inspired art, yes, definitely, absolutely!!! Chibi art, not my thing.
The chip design is a direct rip-off of a fan-made chip-based Dominion. The original designer is here: https://boardgamegeek.com/image/395648/dominion
17) Junk Art WHY DID I BUY IT: Amazon discount! I'd also been hankering to pick up a stacking game, and this looked good. Given the issues some people have had with wood warping, I'm glad I have the plastic version.
PLAYS: 50+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: Whenever it hits the table, it usually ends up being played for a few hours. The variety in game possibilities and keeps it fresh, and it's fun challenging yourself to make crazy structures with awkward pieces. I've had people take photos of their towers whilst playing, and I've had people comment on how interesting it looks.
It's also simple enough to play with anyone, and surprisingly forgiving; my mother has shaky hands, but is still able to play.
CRITICISM: The sphere sucks. Its sole job is to be a useless ball of mediocrity. In any of the games where you choose from three cards, the sphere sits there, unchosen, like an unwanted turd on your front lawn.
I also had a group that would try to make other players mess up by distracting them, which is an interesting metagame in its own right, but also annoying and everyone would end up with their towers knocked over.
Full game felt overcomplicated. We usually just play select games individually, or even just make up our own rules. (Making big towers with multiple bases is fun.)
16) BattleCON WHY DID I BUY IT: Another case of buying, selling, then re-buying. Initially, I was a huge fan of the Westernized anime art style and the gargantuan amount of content. For the repurchase, I'd gained a better understanding of the game through grinding games online.
PLAYS: 50+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: The bluffing here is unrivaled. It's almost euphoric when you land a counter to your opponent's counter of the move they expected you to use. At the same time, it's crushing when you put all your resources into one hit and it fails. BattleCON pulls no punches in letting you feel the highs of your successes and the lows of your failures, a rarity amongst board games, which often avoid mechanisms that would lead to players feeling negative.
In a way, it condenses the combo-driven gameplay engine building games covet into their simplest. Rather than creating complicated Rube Goldberg machines, you choose two cards that compliment each other the best. But going for the best combo all the time will make you predictable, so sometimes you'll change up the combo to try and counter your opponent's move. Learning to play isn't just how to use your character, but how your opponent uses theirs. It's reminiscent of the card puzzle in Gloomhaven, albeit competitive, and emulating a fighting game instead of a dungeon crawler.
I've played the Shekhtur vs Eligor match-up a lot. It still hasn't got stale to me. There's currently 96 characters (with another on the way). That's 4560 unique match-ups in a game that remains fresh, interesting and with more to discovery after many plays using the same characters. The more you play, the more similarities will crop up between characters, unique gimmicks or no, there's only s, so it's unlikely you'd need to experience every permutation to see all this game has to offer. But it's certainly enough to remain interesting for a long while.
CRITICISM: BattleCON is a hard game to get good at. Early games will feel random, and unless you're willing to commit to playing with the same matchup multiple times, it will continue feeling random for a while. It's also extremely player driven. You can go in with a good idea of how to play your character and get hosed because your opponent outpredicted you. That's not a type of game that everyone will like.
The V4 Kickstarter was a bit of a mess. While L99 has addressed the game-breaking issues with a printed errata set, there's still a load of smaller issues that require custom printing to fix (ranging from forgivable terminology inconsistencies to less-forgivable reference card errors and missing icons). It's also got some of the worst card quality I've encountered, with a lot of the cards having scuffs coming out of the box; I usually use clear sleeves for games, but I'd heavily recommend opaque sleeves here.
The older versions had life dials, the newer version has tokens. Life dials are much better.
15) Mottainai WHY DID I BUY IT: The song "Mottai Nightland" from Kyary Pamyu Pamyu.
PLAYS: 100+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: I've had games of this that have lasted two minutes. I've had games that have lasted thirty. Games can change radically based on your starting hand and each players' decisions.
Being able to use every card as an action, a resource or a special effect to build makes every hand an intricate puzzle in deciding what to do. And when you do figure out what you want, it's often explosive. The things some of the special cards can do, or the amount of things you can do when you've built up enough helpers, leads to a bombastic game that gives a memorable experience in a small amount of time.
CRITICISM: It is an intricate game to learn. Not necessarily complicated, but it's tricky to internalize how all the different cards interact. Don't be deceived by the small real estate and cute artwork.
After playing it a lot, I felt it could use an expansion. Sadly said expansion is hard to get outside of America.
14) YINSH WHY DID I BUY IT: I enjoyed TZAAR and YINSH was better rated.
PLAYS: 30+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: Reminiscent of Othello, but entirely it's own beast. The freedom of movement in your rings enables high player agency and it's satisfyingly tactile to flip pieces over on the board. Losing a ring when you score is a cool catchup mechanism, giving a clear sense of even skill when both players get down to one ring.
CRITICISM: The corners seem like a strong place to start.
13) Kingdom Death: Monster WHY DID I BUY IT: I'm a crazy person.
PLAYS: 10+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: I'm still a crazy person.
In the lead up to the second Kickstarter, I heard about this and thought it was dumb. I appreciated the anime aesthetic, clearly inspired by Junji Ito, but there are precious few co-ops I enjoy and the amount of randomness was a sure-fire turn off. Not to mention the price, which was an escalation above some of my already far-too-pricy games.
But I like to give things a shot. Wanting to play physically, I tirelessly print-and-played enough of the game to play up to The Butcher. I set the game up with a gaming buddy, readied our settlement and got to playing.
Oh, we chopped off the lion's bits. Heh. Oh, Splinter died terribly. How sad. Oh, this is fun. Dang.
Rather than putting you in the role of a single character like many other campaign games do, KD:M is more of a civilization game. The characters you play are ones of many. And yet, you give your characters names, they develop skills, you grow attached. Then they die.
Less momentary are the items and weapons you choose to craft from your Hunt's winnings, an extensive metagame with a variety of things to build based upon what you choose to Hunt. It's a classic, and addictive, gameplay loop that keeps you addicted to the game until you face a big bad you just can't beat and reach that fatal game over.
Then go back to trying all over again.
Rather than using narrative snippets to tell a story, Kingdom Death: Monster does it organically, through the results of your fights and through descriptions of things in the world. It has a show-don't-tell narrative, and as someone who doesn't want to read a story when they're supposed to be playing a game, I appreciate its thematic approach. While most compare it to Dark Souls, it reminds me personally of Pokémon. The actual story is barebones, with attachment through the brand coming through the ability to customize the experience and the snippets of world-building that give you a sense of your environment, but leave just as many questions as answers. It is especially fitting for a horror game, as without that fear of the unknown, horror often loses its punch.
While it's subtle in its world-building, Kingdom Death: Monster is often not subtle with its monster designs. The core game is kept relatively tame, but expansions really like throwing phalluses on things. It's not tasteful. It's often more silly than scary. And yet, I can't help but like that silliness.
CRITICISM: What I dislike is the amount of sexualization. Characters are often depicted scantily-clad, if not outright naked, in evocative poses designed to catch the eyes of the lustful, and there's a large amount of egregious non-gameplay pin-up figures associated with the brand. It's at least not terribly prevalent in the actual gameplay content, and I can appreciate the diversity in the Honeycomb Weaver pin-up and male pin-ups.
Despite my enthusiasm through the initial plays and general level of hype for the game as a whole, I have yet to get my physical copy to the table. And as each day passes, I wonder if I still want to. It's a long game, a very long game, that asks players to play time and time again, to learn the ins and outs of the system and experience all it has to offer. And I wonder if I'm still the person that wants to commit the time to learn that system.
Probably. I just need to get my butt in gear and finish building those danged models.
12) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: City Fall/Change is Constant WHY DID I BUY IT: I heard about this and thought it was an RPG. Huzzah! Money saved. Then I learnt it was a 4v1 and my money died.
PLAYS: 20+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: I've had good fun going through the different scenarios with a friend. It feels like a video game in a way, clearing a level and then moving onto the next one. Much like Rise of Moloch, the different scenarios and characters offer a lot of replay value, though it's better here, since I have a preexisting attachment to the franchise.
I could go on about the dice sharing mechanic, the asymmetry between players, the variation in character abilities... it's a skirmish game that keeps things fresh with different scenarios. It doesn't have oodles of depth and sometimes you can get hosed by luck (though there's a decent amount of mitigation), but there's enough thought in planning out what you want to do and making tactical decisions in response to your opponent's moves and what the dice/cards give you.
While TMNT isn't one of my major favorite franchises, I did like it a lot as a child (especially the movies), so it holds a lot of nostalgia for me. I also read the IDW comics when the first Kickstarter hit and consider it my favorite rendition of the franchise, so that's a plus. The main friend I play with has no attachment to the franchise but still loves (and bought) the game. This is the game most IP-driven games wishes they could be.
CRITICISM: They made a 2nd edition not too soon after the 1st edition, and then IDW Games was dissolved before they could do any more expansions.
The player sheets are an obnoxious size.
Games tend to run on the long side.
As with most 4v1 games, it's really a 1v1 skirmish game, 2v1 at most, otherwise there's a lot of downtime for the players involved.
11) Food Chain Magnate WHY DID I BUY IT: Ever since I got into board gaming, I heard of Splotter Spellen on the fringes. Known for their underproduced, yet surprisingly satisfying games, I decided this would be the one I dipped my toes into.
PLAYS: 3
WHY DID I KEEP IT: While my plays have been few, I was smitten from first play. There's a wide range of cards to build your fast food empire, but with ongoing costs to maintain it, there's a direct element of competition in trying to get people to come to your fast food chain, and the theme as a whole is cute. The simple aesthetics making use of fair use clipart appeals to the minimalist in me.
The rules are surprisingly simple considering the depth of the gameplay. It's a classic case of blending player interaction with spatial elements and siphoning off some of the "rules" onto cards.
My pre-order got postponed for limited stock, and I ended up getting a later printing with some fixed errata. Lesson, always wait to see if there's errors in the first printing of games.
CRITICISM: It's long, and while the rules are surprisingly simple, determining where families will go to eat can be annoying.
It's expensive without having gorgeous art or blinged-out components to back it up.
10) The Others WHY DID I BUY IT: The Kickstarter hit shortly after my tastes started shifting from Heavy Euros to more thematic games. I liked the theme, Eric Lang was an accomplished designer (even if I had mixed feelings about Chaos in the Old World) and the corruption track seemed like an interesting design. What could go wrong?
PLAYS: 10+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: Nothing! Nothing could go wrong. Unless you mean my heroes wiping out against an indomitable threat.
Unlike the other 4v1 games I own, this one feels the most like its designed to be endlessly replayable. The scenarios, while fewer in number, present players with more options for play, and being able to use any combination of heroes and villains makes the experience more customizable. This results in a single scenario being played many times, as opposed to the campaign-like style of play Rise of Moloch or TMNT engenders.
The corruption track is a tactile puzzle of giving you a better chance of victory in a short term, but condemning your character to a quicker death in the long term. There's a similar push and pull with keeping characters together to boost your attack power versus spreading them out to perform more actions.
CRITICISM: The aesthetic design is uninspired. Some of the character designs are so generic to the point it's easy to mix characters up (talking about you, core box snipers). In addition, baring one's cleavage clearly bestows superpowers in the world of The Others, as only three of the female characters are covered up—instead showing off their midriff or righteous boob armor.
My girlfriend likes the more monstrous women designs such as the Gluttony Controller and Rose from the core game, saying it promotes a good message of there being beauty in everything. She finds the 'boobs and guns' women a bit boring, though appreciates that they promote a message of being able to wear what you want, even if it's revealing.
While I haven't got bored of the narrative yet, I have had a lot of games end with an equipment-laden hero tying with the big bad, leading heroes to a victory. It's climatic, but feels like the game could be scripted. Also villains turtling up isn't unbeatable, but it's annoying.
Like many other 4v1 games, this plays better as a 1v1 or 2v1 to minimize player downtime.
9) Dominant Species WHY DID I BUY IT: For some reason, the ostrich on the box always looked liked a dinosaur to me, so I thought it was a game about prehistoric times. And everyone knows dinosaurs are cool. Though it was also a highly rated conflict-driven low luck strategy game, so that was the core reason.
PLAYS: 3
WHY DID I KEEP IT: You can starve your opponents, hunt and make them KA-BOOM! I like ka-boom.
The delayed Worker Placement mechanism meets area control burns my brain like no other game. Sure, Lisboa is complicated. YINSH has seemingly endless permutations of play. BattleCON has a steep barrier to entry. But this, having to plan out in advance what you want to do in reaction to things your opponents could do while your opponents are doing the same thing to you... I've literally started playing this and had to stop because another player had a headache.
It's so delicious!
CRITICISM: And yet, the brain burning, length of play and optimal player count of 4+ keep it away from my table. I can only hope one day, I can give it, and Chad Jensen (may he rest in peace), the respect they deserve.
Keeping track of domination is an exercise... though the rulebook explicitly says that dominance has to be noticed, so I guess it adds another layer to the game. No! Don't pay attention to the game, look, it's Trickerion!
8) Race for the Galaxy WHY DID I BUY IT: One of my earlier purchases, a little card game that promises the fulfillment of a larger game? How can this be?
PLAYS: 100+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: It's a little card game that's as fulfilling as a larger game. Most directly, it's based upon Puerto Rico, a once popular game that's lost some traction in recent years, though I'd also say it offers the same sort of engine building Terraforming Mars does at a quarter of the playtime.
Predicting your opponent's actions and trying to benefit most off them, while also trying not to let your opponent benefit off you opens up an interesting bluffing game. The variety of cards and the random card draws means your strategies will vary game to game. Having to discard cards to play cards introduces a tense puzzle of sometimes discarding cards you want to keep or having to take inefficient actions to draw more.
I've played online a few times and gotten absolutely trounced, showing I have more to learn.
CRITICISM: The icons... are few in number and not hard to understand at all. It even comes with multiple player aids. You'll learn them after a play or two and they make the game quicker than if it used text for everything. However, in combination with sterile colors that evoke little sense of excitement, they make the cards feel oddly thematic. Alien. Other. Which is cool and all, but not conducive to getting people to play.
It's better with an expansion or two to balance out the military strategy in the core game.
7) Argent: The Consortium WHY DID I BUY IT: I heard it pitched as "Dumbledore is retiring and you're trying to become the new Hogwarts headmaster by winning the favor of the school board".
PLAYS: 10+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: It's combative. It's strategic. It's fantastical. It has both depth of play and breadth of content in spades.
I don't know if I'll ever play all it has to offer, and that's just delightful. Do you want to gather spells, supporters, items? Horde gold, mana or peek at the voters? It's not a woven tapestry of interconnected actions like a Lacerda game, but by pairing a lot of options with a lot of interaction, it can be tricky determining what the optimal play may be. Especially when the next game may have an entirely different setup.
While most other games are content to have you tally up points, Argent rewards you for having the most of various different resources. Most money? That's a vote. Most green supporters? That's a vote. While most other scoring rounds in games are an anticlimatic mathematical affair, Argent's shifting of the standard formula keeps things exciting right until the end.
CRITICISM: It's a table hog. The spell cards are an awkward size, with only slightly bigger 80x120mm sleeves fitting them.
I had the first edition with its too too tiny box. Currently most of the game cards are in the expansion box, because everything just won't fit.
6) Rising Sun WHY DID I BUY IT: I saw the Yurei (1) model and instantly loved it. Japanese folklore is a rich subject that's taken my interest ever since watching Ninja Sentai Kakuranger (2) as a young child.
PLAYS: 10+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: The alliance-driven role selection mechanism took my fancy from the moment I saw it in the rulebooks. It's a well-established mechanism, but usually attached to resource management games à la Puerto Rico rather than combat-driven games (outside of the behemoth that is Twilight Imperium), and combining it with alliances was an added extra quirk.
The asymmetric powers and engine building are distinct and make every game feel different. They're simple enough that it doesn't become some convoluted Rube Goldberg monstrosity that distracts from the other elements of the game, but still fun in differentiating the experience for each player.
But the crowning achievement is the combat system. It's simple, effective, but so unique. It's always a bunch of fun budgeting for fights, groaning as you realise you have nowhere near enough money to win all the areas you want, whooping as you pay just the right amount to prevent your demise.
On top of that, the board is beautiful, the monsters have the right amount of cool and creepy, and there's plenty of different cards to keep you coming back for more. TATAKAE! (3)
CRITICISM: The setup of this game is a chore. The pack away is so much worse. I have labels on the miniature insert to note where everything goes. And if you have bling from the Kickstarter, good luck fitting it into the core box. Despite how annoyingly big it is, it's already packed tight.
It also tends to run long. If you keep a tight leash on peoples' analysis paralysis (during the battles mainly), it can hit the two-hour mark, but I often found it went over.
Resetting some of your resources between each Season feels counter-intuitive. Necessary for game balance, but counter-intuitive nonetheless. It also feels odd to have an odd number of players given someone will be left out of an alliance each round, but it works fine in practice.
The player screens and cheap and they've done the Kitsune (4) an injustice. It's also disappointing there's so many Oni (5) and Dragons, considering how many options for cool monsters Japanese lore by itself has.
1: Yurei are Japanese ghosts
2: Sentai shows started being adapted for Western audiences with Power Rangers in 1991. Kakuranger was adapted into the third season of Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers, but the Japanese folklore elements were removed.
3: Japanese for FIGHT!
4: A Kitsune are depicted as fox-like tricksters that like pranking people, but tend to be loyal. They are said to shapeshift and produce fire. The most well-known example in Western media is the Pokémon Ninetales. (https://wattention.com/mythical-creature-kitsune)
5: Oni are Japanese demons
5) Innovation WHY DID I BUY IT: I enjoyed Mottainai and wanted more of that goodness. Though Eclipse had let me down, so my hopes were not high.
PLAYS: 50+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: Hopes rejuvenated! Players are kept in constant competition, trying to have the most of any given technology type to not have their special effects leeched... and to leech their opponents actions in turn. It also prevents them from being attacked, and boy howdy, do you not want to be attacked.
There are multiple ways to win, by claiming achievements through generating points or special objectives, by having the most points when the last deck is empty and somebody tries to draw, or through crazy card effects that crop up in the late game that allow you to instantly win if you meet certain conditions.
The game rewards multiple plays. As you start to remember certain cards, you gain a keener understanding of what you should be aiming for and what your opponent may be aiming for. If you don't have a card, chances are your opponent does.
It's a back-and-forth game of racing your opponent to victory, and throwing a rock at them if they get ahead. Fun: It's mandatory! You must have it, or else. (1)
For a brief period of time, I actually ran some local tournaments for the game, before it ceded its popularity for a game further down the list.
CRITICISM: It's a 2 player game acting like it doesn't become far worse with 3 or 4.
Mathematics is dumb.
The first person POV on the cards is weird and harder to understand than the usual second person POV.
(1) From the Innovation rulebook
4) Power Grid WHY DID I BUY IT: It came highly-rated. I certainly didn't buy it for the boxart.
PLAYS: 50+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: It sat unplayed for a long time until I got it to the table. Wow, what a game. While phase-based gameplay as opposed to an action-based mechanism tends to make games feel a bit dated, it works great here, with each phase being an entirely different competition with the other players.
The most clever part of the game for me is the split market. Only the top row of power plants are available for auction, allowing players to plan their bids accordingly and reducing the amount of luck when a new Power Plant comes out (since it's often not available for purchase immediately). Plus, at the end of the round, the most expensive Power Plant goes to the bottom of the deck, giving players an indication of what's coming up later in the game.
I feel like I understand Power Grid. I get what I need to do to win and won't be discovering any new levels of depth. And yet, pushing my opponents to spend too much on power plants, overbuying a resource to make it cost more for my opponents, and mathing out the most optimal routes on the map... it has an evergreen quality to it that always keeps me coming back for more.
Also it has plenty of expansions to keep things fresh!
CRITICISM: The box art is dull and actively turns people off playing. Do you wanna play action heroes fighting a demonic threat or factory man with a clipboard?
It's a bit on the long side and the middle can sometimes drag with no good power plants to buy, though the new Recharged rules may fix that.
Refilling the market is a tough job, but somebody has to do it.
3) Terra Mystica WHY DID I BUY IT: I picked up a bunch of gateway games initially, but decided to get this one too. I thought it'd be a challenge to learn.
PLAYS: 20+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: I got bored with the gateway games real quickly and dying to play something bigger. It took me a while to learn the rules, not from any particular issue with the rulebook, but because I wasn't yet used to learning behemoths like this. And yet I've had a game where I explained the rules to a beginner in a couple of minutes, how times change!
Terra Mystica in a lot of ways should be a type of game I hate. There's no direct interaction, there are points everywhere and the theme isn't especially well meshed to the gameplay. And yet, it works for me.
There's several points of interaction in the game: Leeching power from opponent's builds, blocking your opponent on the board, using spells, racing on the cult track, and choice of keys. While I'm not sending my players' buildings to the depths of tartarus whilst laughing on their smoking remains, there's enough interaction to keep up a constant sense of competition.
While you are rewarded some points for doing certain things, the main goals of the game are to occupy the most spots on the board and ascend up the cult tracks. Having those goals gives it a sense of focus that point salad games à la Stefan Feld lack.
I understand the criticisms of the game being mechanisms first, theme second... the theme works for me. It's a weird fantasy magic world where species cast spells with their bowls of power. The Fakirs fly on magic carpets, the Mermaids swim on lakes. It's far from the most appropriately themed game in my collection, and the theme doesn't aid teaching it, but it doesn't feel mismatched.
There's a lot of things to manage, a lot of variety in player powers and enough depth to the game that I learn new things every time I play. It was one of my first games and still stands out as one of my favorites.
CRITICISM: Choosing bad starting spots can severely impact what you're able to do throughout the game, very beginner unfriendly.
The creators released a starting point adjustment for the different factions, with stronger factions starting with less points and weaker ones starting with more. It's not as good as retooling the factions to make the balance closer, but it's a good enough patch to make games tighter.
The lack of an official 2 player map is frustrating.
2) Cthulhu Wars WHY DID I BUY IT: I bought the core game on discount, wanting a simple war game with cool miniatures. Little did I know...
PLAYS: 80+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: First play good. Second play better. The ones following solidified this game as a favorite. The player powers are distinctive and bombastic, leading each faction to have wholly different styles of play. The action system is simple and allows flexibility in what players choose do do. Then, there's spellbooks.
When you meet certain requirements, you unlock special abilities, unique for every faction. It provides a smooth narrative arc for the game and gives you an indication on how you're supposed to play your faction.
My favorite factions are Black Goat and Opener of the Way, the more complicated factions in the game. Black Goat seem like they'd be good at turtling up, but doing so usually wastes a bunch of power and stops you from reaching your spellbook requirements. Opener of the Way's Yog-Sothoth allows you to spawn minions anywhere with a gate, making it feel like he has full control over the board.
I have no attachment to the Cthulhu Mythos outside of this game (and it's the only Cthulhu-related game I own), so while people may appreciate it more if they have an attachment to it, it's hardly a necessity. The player boards even have short stories on the reverse side for those who want a taster!
Also worth mentioning for anyone interested in the game, but doesn't want to spend a ton, 2 different sets of Duel gives you everything you need to play 3 player (the 2 player map in Cthulhu Wars is the same as the 3 player map). The 4+ player maps just add more areas, so you could indicate these with string, or pick up one of the expansion maps (the oversized Earth map is just a bigger version of the core game map, while the Primeval map only makes some small changes).
CRITICISM: After 40 plays or so, the core game by itself was starting to lose its luster, so additional factions are eventually needed to keep things fresh.
I'm not too fond of Yellow Sign or Tcho-Tcho. Their interaction is mostly passive and as a result, are the easiest to play. Tcho-Tcho is especially egregious, forcing other players to gang up and beat on them early so they don't win by round 4.
The dice for combat and random draw elder signs works and rarely does the game feel like it comes down to luck. It's still my least favorite part of the game.
And NUMBER ONE! Exceed: Fighting System WHY DID I BUY IT: After Argent, Level 99 was on my radar, and this looked to fix the things I didn't (initially) like about BattleCON. The Exceed: Seventh Cross Kickstarter was up and there was a print and play to try out...
PLAYS: 2000+
WHY DID I KEEP IT: For a while, Level 99 would send free cards periodically to players who logged the requisite amount of plays. This lit a fire under my local game group that wanted the free stuff. Combined with its accessibility, short game length, low buy-in cost and playing online with friends and Level 99 Discord denizens alike, I quickly racked up a ton of plays.
Exceed marries the bluffing and arena movement of BattleCON with the multi-use cards and action mechanism of a Chudyk game. For years I was looking for a game that would evoke a similar feeling to me as TCG, downplaying the deckbuilding and emphasizing skill level, and this game delivers.
Fighters come with pre-built decks balanced to play on par with every other fighter, each with their own unique playstyle, but centralized through basic cards every fighter has. It's easy to learn, but has depth to its gameplay, especially through cards like Focus or Block, which reward knowledge of the cards.
My favorite characters are pretty much any of them. I have a preference towards Season 2 (Seventh Cross), because it has my favorite aesthetic and their transformation gimmick give permanent effects that stay in play for the rest of the game, giving a sense of development and escalation, something lacking from the other seasons.
CRITICISM: When you get to a high level of play, keeping track of used cards is essential.
The TaxiMeta, a specific group of people playing the game, has developed a grind playstyle I do not care for, but may be representative of optimal play.
Zsolt, Renea and The Beheaded are fun to play, frustrating to play against.
Season 2 (Seventh Cross) onwards dramatically improves things, from balance to quality-of-life improvements via tuckboxes and reference cards.

I can't fucking take it. I see an image of a random pig or crown posted and then I see it, I fucking see it. "Oh that looks kinda like Technoblade" it started as: That's funny, that's a cool funny thing. But I kept going, I'd see a farm with a pig in it, I'd see a crown clipart on my school homework, my last notification on my phone was that i got 7 upvotes, I'd notice that it's been more than a week since the last Technoblade video. And every time I'd burst into an insane, breath deprived laugh staring at the image as the image of Technoblade ran through my head. I'm scared to look at the time any youtube video was released. It's torment, psychological torture, I am being conditioned to laugh maniacly any time I see a pig or a potato. I can't fucking live like this... I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't! And don't get me fucking started on the words! I'll never hear the phrase "i like potatoes" again without thinking of Technoblade. I could watch a man fucking kill an entire orphanage and all I would be able to say is "Technoblade in real life?????? " and laugh like a fucking insane person. And the word "Orphan" is ruined. I can't live anymore. Technoblade has destroyed my fucking life. I want to eject myself from this plane of existence.

FCK WHT Y THNK & FCK WHT Y HRD
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Soundtrack: J'OUVERT - BROCKHAMPTON
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It's dark. Tree branches high-five one another as they flow in the wind, their chartreuse leaves glinting like emeralds in the night. An empyrean like an abyss hangs over the desolate suburban streets, and the sound of cicadas buzzes around the road. We see more shots of the cul de sac; a stray cat leaps from a roof, close-ups of the modern architecture, and a single light coming from a window. Once zoomed in, Atlas Rogue is visible, a set of headphones hanging around his neck, getting what looks like a pair of Vans on. He adorns a black, yellow, and red 'Dream Bleeder' hoodie (now 20% off at FBE.com/shop) and some ripped jeans, a dark Pringles hat keeping his messy short newly dyed purple hair from showing. He leaves the house and walks up to the camera, smashing it to pieces with his elbow, but only after saying one line:
I'm the Aussie Night Terror, bitch.
The feed cuts to black.
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Fast-forward a few days and we see a shot of an alleyway. We hear a crack as a man is sent spine-first into a brick wall and another attacker's jaw is smashed by a vicious knee, squishing his skull between the hard wall and the knee. A third begs for mercy, and the camera zooms in to get a good look at his face: bushy beard, short, greasy brown hair, and hazel eyes. But standing over him is a much taller figure, and he lifts the pleading man up, getting him up on his shoulders in a Burning Hammer position before spiralling him down into a DDT onto the concrete pavement. The camera quickly shuffles away from its hiding spot and back into the street, not wanting to be seen by the purple-haired character making his way back into the open. Atlas Rogue checked his pockets, before realising his stolen wallet must've still been in the grasp of the first attacker. He strides back into the alleyway, and the lack of visible confrontation is compensated with the screams of a grown-man coming after audible punches and kicks from Rogue. Atlas re-appeared from the alley, sliding his retrieved wallet into his pocket before looking around and making eye contact with the camera. Infuriated, he ran over with fire in his eyes and the cameraman stumbles backwards, accidentally dropping the camera on the floor. We hear grunts and shouts of agony before a distinct Dead Rose Shot is heard, the same pattern of the Spinning Elbow and following Lariat being made out. With the move, the man falls to the ground, the top half of his body visible in the camera shot, the back of his skull now a crimson waterfall. Rogue picked up the camera, grinning in the light of the streetlamp above him, smashing down the camera once again onto the floor. The feed cuts to black.
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The rattling of steel and the chants of fight echoing throughout the abandoned underground car park accompany Atlas Rogue to the metal cage, no referee in sight. Rogue stares down at the cold hard concrete floor which he stands on, the barbaric men around him yelling insults. His opponent stands across from him: the undefeated Njal, a 300-pound 6'5'' Scandinavian man with a beard the size of a small dog, going by the moniker 'the Viking'. Atlas wasn't new to the sport of illegal cage fighting; he had a record of 5-1 since his debut in December of 2019, only losing to Hyousuke Takashima, a young Japanese fighter beaten to death after he was thought to be cheating somehow. But now Rogue had to take on the massive 'Viking', and with the crowd heavily against Atlas, he would have to prove himself worthy. As soon as the cage door was shut, Njal charged at Rogue, but Atlas quickly rolled out of the way, jumping on his back and locking in a Rear Naked Choke. He was soon squashed against the cage wall, an outline of the diamond-shaped mesh imprinted on his back. He had to release the hold to reposition himself, but as he tried to manoeuvre around his opponent, he was met with a headbutt, followed up by a vicious Irish Whip into the metal. A massive bare foot connected with the cheek of Atlas followed up by more kicks and fists. Njal went for another Irish Whip, but Rogue rebounded from the whip and luckily landed a jumping knee right to his nose, sending Njal staggering, and this would be the first opening of the bout, but Njal swatted away Rogue with a single kick to the gut, winding the Australian. Atlas didn't want to give Njal any time to rest, so parried a few forearms and twisted the wrist of the Viking, elbowing the joint to weaken any shots before locking in a Kimura, only to be slammed down hard on the concrete. Atlas had gotten used to the hard flooring after every match, but his body was built for wrestling canvas, so the pain was immense despite his experience in the cage. He cinched the Kimura in deeper, and he was lifted up again by Njal, so before he let himself be sent back down onto the floor, he released the hold and kneed the ribs of Njal a couple of times, kicked at the calves of his opponent, and landed two consecutive punches to the inured nose, busting him open! Blood poured from his face but Rogue didn't stop, going for a Spear into the cage wall, only to be met with a knee of the Viking's own, and Njal grabbed the skull of Atlas, headbutting it repeatedly, followed up by a wicked Lariat. Njal had to take the time to check to his nose, and as Rogue lays on the floor he knew that he had a chance, and so as Njal returned to Atlas, Rogue managed to lock in a Triangle Hold! He quickly grasped the fingers of Njal, snapping them one by one, but he knew that he couldn't make the Viking tap, so he got back to his feet and delivered a few Curb Stomps to him onto the ground, before nailing Njal with a Gunsmoke Knee to the back of the neck as he kneeled! The crowd was erupting, not wanting to see their king dethroned, but Atlas knew that victory was in his sights, and he ascended the cage, sitting atop the corner, and he waited for his opponent to get on his hands and feet. He jumped off the top, hitting a Dream Bleeder stomp, connecting with the spine of Njal, and the Viking crumbled, unconscious, and defeated. The horde outside was silent at first, before breaking into cheers and serenading Atlas. Rogue hushed them all, merely saying "You all just witnessed regicide. I am your King now." He left the cage soaked in blood, disappearing down a dark lane once outside of the facility, not wanting to be seen by police or angry attendants who put their money on Njal. The feed cuts to black.
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A dimly lit room is the setting of the latest shot, and all that can be seen is an old television sitting on a worn antique chair. The TV shows static, however, the screen sometimes flickers to different scenes. One time, we see a picture of Travis Crowley, only a sharp grin over his mouth and a gun to his head has been drawn.
The next is simply the word 'UNKNOWN' in black writing going over the static.
The third change sees Atlas Rogue in Devil face-paint from his match with Desmond Caid at Rush Hour 2019, lying in the ring, defeated.
We then see a replay from the Carnage Tour when Inferno betrayed British Ambition, and Ape rushing down to stop him with security. Again, we see the same 'UNKNOWN' visual, but it's quickly changed back to the static.
Joba can be seen on the screen next, shouting "FUCK WHAT YOU THINK AND FUCK WHAT YOU HEARD" in a heat-detecting camera, the same shot from J'OUVERT's music video.
The static goes for much longer after that, but the next scene is a collection of videos where Atlas Rogue and Nate Matthews have interacted, starting with the Summerfest Rally, then The Celestial Unknown's attack on him and Ape in the main event, then Lifeline vs CU ending in a draw, then Firestorm XXV when Two Man Mosh Pit and Celestial Unknown battled in a Triple Threat, then on the Firestorm's leading up to Final Stand where they both attacked each other, including Nate using brass rings to knock out Rogue post-match, followed by the first night of the Carnage Tour where their respective teams once again fought in a Triple Threat, then their eventual tie at New Beginning II, before the Fatal 4-Way Ladder Match at Unbreakable II.
'UNKOWN' shows back up on the screen, but is replaced by a picture of Ape holding the World Title, the same grin over his mouth and the same drawn on gun to his head.
The first-ever episode of HTPOFE rapidly shows up, but that's discharged by a picture of The Unholy Empire's logo, the faction consisting of Oni, Damien Blade, and Sevens, yet never debuted.
The single 'UNKNOWN' returns for the penultimate shot, but the final thing we see on the TV screen is the static that started it, and the TV is turned off by someone out of frame. An axe smashes the screen to pieces. Atlas Rogue reveals himself, a crown of thorns atop his skull, and he moves the TV off of the couch, sitting down and pointing a finger gun to his head. His hand covers his mouth, and on the back of his hand is the same drawn on grin. Rogue just sits there, not saying anything and not moving, until he winks at the camera, fire starting to light itself below the camera out of shot. The smoke covers the view of Atlas, and we hear a loud BANG as the camera starts melting. The feed cuts to black.
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dreambleederdreambleederdreambleederdreambleederdreambleederdreambleeder

Cross-posted from psychonaut cause why the hell not. Here is the story of the most powerful psychedelic and spiritual experience of my life, which was almost a year ago.
I was attending the Phish concert on 12/29 at Madison Square Garden with my best friend (shout out to any fellow phans in here, you will know this show was top notch). So naturally decided to dose LSD for the show, since Phish and acid go together like salt and pepper. I am fairly experienced with acid, having done it around 15-20 times, usually in lower doses but with a couple of heavier trips here and there. Always loved it and had blissful and eye-opening experiences for the most part. The hit I took this time was only around 150ug, so nothing too crazy. But little did I know that combined with the incredibly psychedelic atmosphere and my state of mind, I was in for my most mind-blowing experience with the substance yet.
So anyway, we get to MSG a bit later than we hoped, we take our tabs on the street and head inside to our seats. The show started earlier than we were expecting, and neither of us were yet tripping at the time. Regardless, the show starts off fantastic with some dark and crunchy tunes, and I'm absolutely loving it. We were seated right to the side of the stage, about 30 feet from the band, and the view was incredible.
Then about three or four songs in, I start to really feel it. For those that don't know, the floor at Madison Square Garden literally bounces. The reason is because it is located several stories above Penn Station, was designed so that the structure of the arena would have some give and take due to the vibrations from the trains underneath. So the floor is shaking and bouncing under me, like we're on a ship. I'm starting to trip, and the band is absolutely killing it. I started to get the peculiar feeling, as I often do at Phish shows, that all of the songs in the setlist were divinely placed. Every song flowed together like a story. This show was predestined, and there was no other way things were going to go down.
Halfway through the first set, my friend asks me if I want to smoke a joint. I tell him I'd rather wait a bit. I usually like to wait until after I've peaked to smoke while tripping, especially since I hadn't been smoking much lately. Towards the end of the set, they start playing one of my favorite songs, and I tell my friend to light it up. We smoke and during the climax of the last song things start to get really fucky. The music sounds absolutely out of the world, and the lights are going crazy. Words that kept coming to mind were "space" and "aliens". I start to get a really strange feeling that was both familiar and unfamiliar. I lost my usual sense of mind and self-awareness. My body felt numb and incredibly stoned. All that I could experience was the incredibly stimulating environment around me. I felt as though I was in a dream. I was simultaneously freaking out and extremely calm. I later understood that this was a beginning phase of ego death.
And then comes the set break, where things got really interesting. Once the stimulation of the lights and music died down, I was given a wonderful chance to explore this psychedelic headspace that I had found myself in. Let me first give some context to explain what happened next. A few years ago, I had gotten interested in chanting Hare Krishna after exploring different meditation techniques. I discovered that chanting this mantra was an incredibly powerful tool for entering a trance and exploring the mind (for any who are interested, try listening to this loop of chanting by the founder of the movement. It is very relaxing and meditative). I also understood that those who follow the Hare Krishna worship God in the form of Krishna. I was always spiritual and highly inquisitive about the nature of reality, but wouldn't consider myself religious and never saw myself subscribing to an organized religion. But strangely enough, the more I chanted Hare Krishna, the more I came to identify with the God Krishna as he was depicted in the art. This was and still is very mysterious for me. I started to wonder if there really was a God behind this universe, and whether the image of this Hindu deity might actually constitute a meaningful representation of whatever that was. (I know some of you here are very anti-religion, but please don't do that on my thread because I really don't give a fuck).
Anyway, back to me sitting in my chair at set break. I closed my eyes and began to meditate, and very quickly entered that beautiful lucid realm of LSD-infused meditation, which I'm sure many of you are familiar with. I started breathing slowly and deeply, and it felt amazing. And then I started chanting Hare Krishna while on acid for the first time in my life. Holy fucking shit. I never went so deeply into a trance my entire life. The chanting that was coming from lungs and my vocal chord and my mouth became automatic. It felt addicting and incredibly hypnotizing. I could feel it deep in my throat, and what felt like my heart. I was struck by the mind blowing realization that the mantra was already there inside me, and that I had merely tapped into it. I was conscious that while I was chanting, I was tapping my leg like crazy and that there was a powerful energy running through me (my friend sitting next to me was lost in thought and didn't even notice what I was doing lol). I felt amazing and entered a highly spiritual headspace.
While I was chanting, I asked myself a question: "Is there really a God? And if there is a God, whatever that is... can it be in the form of a personality that I can understand... like a friend?" As soon as I asked myself that, I was overcome with a surging feeling of bliss and peace that I had never experienced before and haven't experienced since. I felt what I can only describe as a "presence" or a "personality" with me. I recognized that presence as my own self, yet deeper and higher. This presence had a quality which I can only describe as perfectly serene. At the same time, I had a vision in my mind's eye (my eyes were closed) of the Flower of Life. For those that don't know, it looks like this. I meditated on this image and it felt incredibly beautiful and peaceful, and I felt myself going into an even deeper state of trance. Then the really mind blowing part: the image of the Flower of Life suddenly morphed into the Thousand-Petaled Lotus, which looks somewhat like this. It is similar in essence to the flower of life, but with infinite parts spiraling towards an infinite center. This was the climax of the trip and it was utterly mind blowing. This vision lasted probably five seconds, and then I opened my eyes because it was too overwhelming. I looked at my friend chilling next to me unaware, and I had a strong urge to tell him "I think I just met God". But I thought that would be too weird and corny, so I told him that I thought of something funny and would tell him later. (I did tell him later, and we laughed about it).
Anyway the second set starts, and I come down a bit. The music was incredible as expected, and I keep seeing the Flower of Life in my mind's eye. I felt as though the music I was hearing was a manifestation of whatever energy I had just tapped into, and by extension a manifestation of my higher self. This feeling lasted well into the night, even when we left the concert and went back to our air bnb. I was seeing and feeling the image of the Flower of Life in my mind's eye for the remainder of the trip, and it brought my a powerful feeling of peace and serenity. I later realized that the image of the Thousand Petaled Lotus is associated with the Crown Chakra, which blew my mind to pieces once again. Bear in mind, I was mildly interested in sacred geometry before this experience, but I had never really resonated with it or understood what it was all about.
Anyway, here I am a year later still on my spiritual journey, and holding this experience in my heart as one of my most powerful. I am still chanting Hare Krishna and reading books about Krishna consciousness. I am still somewhat skeptical of organized religion as a whole, but I nonetheless believed based on my experience chanting the mantra that these guys were really onto something. I look forward to tripping at my next Phish show, coming up in about a month, and of course chanting during set break to see what I can see :)
Thanks to anyone who read this.