Gay sprial stories

TL;DR- husband is a cheater (emotional affairs/ inappropriate behaviors). Gave him a chance, found more cringe messages this time with a man. I’m feeling unsure of what to do and kind of stuck, but don’t want to/afraid to move on.
On Easter Sunday, I (31f) found out my husband (31m) had been cheating for months. Having emotional affairs with women in random states (via Facebook dating), he would make plans to go visit them. The biggest one was that he was having a big time emotional affair with HIS MASSAGE THERAPIST who lives in our small town. They both denied anything physical and I don’t believe either one of them because they both have lied to me as far as their stories not adding up. I can’t prove anything was sexual but I did make him get an STD test (negative ftr). He was extremely apologetic, deleted and blocked everyone, swore he wanted to make it work and fix us. We even had couples counseling scheduled before I found all this out because he told me a few weeks before he wanted to make us work (lots of general marriage problems), yet the night before I found it out, he called the massage chick right after talking to me. I “caved” and while I definitely haven’t forgiven or forgotten, I did try to move forward. However, moving forward I believe had made him think he got away with it. I can tell in his behaviors towards me that he dgaf, but he says he’s just trying to move on 🙄 Well fast forward to yesterday morning around 4am I couldn’t sleep, so I went to login to Facebook, but his Facebook was now on my app and it was totally logged in. (Quick side story, I think our internet is hacked, he’s never logged into fb on my phone and the night before only my one fb profile was there.) So obviously, I looked at his messages because I can’t trust him anymore (I really don’t care if anyone has a problem with me doing that). He didn’t have any messages with other women, but idk what drew me to it, I decided to check his messages with his old guy friend who I have sworn is creepy obsessed with him. Their messages are cringe. Back in April 22nd, the guy asked my husband if he’s “ever jerked off to anything he’s sent him.” My husband said “yeah! Plenty of times!” Then the guy said “when are you gonna return the favor?” My husband didnt reply, then a little later in the messages my husband is talking about his sexuality, saying he knows he’s not gay because he tried having a boyfriend when he was younger and it wasn’t for him. But that he feels he connects emotionally with men and women. Anyways, I talked to him about their convo which he flat out denied jerking off to pics of the guy. I don’t believe that either. He’s a notorious liar. I said though even if you didn’t, it’s still super inappropriate. He should have made it abundantly clear that he’s married and not interested (this guy has known we were married. But my husband has been leading almost everyone to believe we’re divorced so idk what the guy thinks.) My mom thinks I should message the guy and tell him that’s my husband and basically to fuck off. I don’t really know what to do. I think I’m a bit codependent and trauma bonded in a sense (we’re not physically abusive). I know everyone is gonna tell me to leave him, but this is my second marriage and I’m so fucking tired of starting over and having so many hopes. Even as much as I can’t stand the sight of him right now, he’s still the only person I want to hang out with, be the first person to tell anything to, etc. so I’m just at a loss and not sure what to do. Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading!

Query:
Dear […],
[Personalization]
Late at night on August 17th, 1989, three terrible things happened in the small town of Garrison. An infant was stolen from its crib, never to be seen again, a forest fire sparked just a mile down the road, and the first in a series of grisly murders rocked the town. All had one thing in common: they were perpetrated by what those in the town call the Shadow Man.
Or so the story goes.
Amateur podcaster Finn Mitchell has been obsessed with this bit of folklore since his best friend Omari Mason shared it with him. Now, they’re both out in the secluded town of Garrison, surrounded by the forests and hills of West Virginia on the hunt to find out if it’s true. As they dig into the Shadow Man encounters, they struggle to get anyone to even talk to them, let alone offer insight into the tragic events. Undeterred, they continue even as anonymous phone calls, not-so-veiled threats, and a fresh murder all pull their attention in different directions. It seems the legend wasn’t such a deeply buried memory after all, and figuring out the truth behind it will be the only thing that can save the town from further torment.
Strange Trails is a 99,000 word standalone speculative mystery with series potential. Like a mix between the story of A Good Girl’s Guide to Murder series and the atmosphere and social tones of Lovecraft Country, it covers real world issues people in small town America might face today. This is part of an #OwnVoices submission, with Omari Mason being a gay man, as am I. Strange Trails is based on an audio drama I wrote that currently has over 100,000 listens and charted in the Top 15 Fiction Podcasts on Spotify. I’ve included […] for your consideration. Thank you for your time.
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300 words:
Finn Mitchell took a deep breath and leaned forward into his microphone, speaking in a low voice. "Late at night on August 17th, 1989, three terrible things happened in the small town of Garrison. An infant was stolen from its crib, never to be seen again, a forest fire sparked just a mile down the road, and the first in a series of grisly murders rocked the town. All had one thing in common: they were perpetrated by what those in the town call the Shadow Man." He let that linger for a moment before continuing. "Lost among the forests and hills of West Virginia, Garrison hides away a dark history almost no one outside of the town has heard. Until now.
"Welcome to Strange Trails. I'm your host, Finn Mitchell, and over the next few episodes I'm going to bring you along on my investigation into just who the Shadow Man is and what is going on in Garrison." Finn pulled away from the microphone on his desk, stopping the recording. That was take three; the first time he’d made it through the introduction of his podcast without choking on spit.
A few months back he’d had an idea which had quickly expanded in his mind, consuming him until he had to do something about it. This small town, he was convinced, was finally what he’d been searching for.
"How was that?" he asked, looking over his shoulder. He removed his glasses, massaging his right eye with the side of his hand.
One of the two motel beds creaked as his friend Omari Mason turned on his side to face Finn. “Sounded the same as the other two times to me," he said absently, using his phone camera to adjust a rogue coil of hair back into place.

Ik its not the place for these kind of questions but if anyone can suggest a tv show/movie that would be great What i like: -Gay love story stuff like CMBYN/firebird/Maurice (sad ones especially) -supernatural/magic stuff : marvel/ the witcher /the 100/TVD … - I dont mind animated but i dont like anime
So if you know something in one of those styles plz help a bro out

The Eighth Sense is the best BL to date. I‘ve just finished it and I need to rant or I explode.
Let‘s begin with the title - the eighth sense is pain. All characters experience some kind of turmoil/chaos/hurt in their lives. In addition, this show is also about belonging and finding out where your place in the world is.
Theme:
For Jin Hyun it is adjusting to life away from home in an environment where he doesn‘t seem to fit in - he is confronted with the fact that parst of his self don‘t seem to fit in: his clothes, his dialect. And his sexuality. He knew that he doesn‘t like girls hence the blocking towards Ae Ri in the beginning but he is not sure if being gay would be accepted. Meeting Jae Won, who doesn‘t seem to care how JH is perceived but cares about about him as a person, is the trigger for JH to learn that you should go for what you want and that there is strength in opening up to the people around you.
Jae Won‘s pain seems the most obvious. Depression and survivors guilt is a heavy load, so he tries to max out his good day only to become a shell of himself on the bad days. He gets pressure from all sides, his friends, his ex-girlfriend and his father to fit into this golden-boy image. He‘s also trying to find his place in the world away from what others want from him. His pain stems from the fact that he belives that he hurts other people by being himself.
Yoon Won seems cheerful on the outside but like everyone she tries to find her place in the world while for others she is an anchor point as a club president and friend. Her talking about graduation and how everything seems to fall appart really resonated with me.
Eun Ji is depicted in the beginning as the villain but more and more we see that the she really loves JW and tries everything to keep him. Is it morally wrong? Yes, and also cheating sucks, but her developement is that she learns to let go of the idea of happiness she has and let JW go because he was miserable with her.
Tae Hyung is the most unlikeable character, he is selfish, jealous, not empathetic and a really bad friend. Only in the last episode he seems to realize that his actions have consequences and that being yourself is no excuse for being cruel. In the end he has lost his best friend and crush.
Because I really liked Joon Pyo I want to add his perspective. He is really excited about the life in the city with his best friend but JH is pushing him away because JP is not the epitome of fitting in the chique city life. Yet he continues to be the best friend ever!
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Cinematrography:
I‘m in awe - it feels so real. The cuts are perfect and are creating an atmosphere highlighting the duality of tender moments vs. harsh reality. They also have scenes which don’t seem to give much to the story, like the selfies at the beach, but these moments are so realistic and important for the audience to connect with the characters. In addition the use of close-ups creates more intimacy and anticipation.
The lighting is also very personal. You immediately see if it‘s JW or JH emotion being depicted. Sometimes the lighting and the atmosphere switch mid-scene. These subtle changes show the complexity of their relationship. Think of the beach-trip where everything is gloomy but once they got together everything went bright and blurry - also a nod to the scene where JW mixed his medication with alcohol and everything went dreamy.
The music was generally good, a few misses for me but more important are the scenes with no music. Where it is all just breathing and slowly interwining hands. My heart.
Queerness:
The stolen glances, insecure talks - this is how it is to be queer. Not knowing if the other person is too. I also loved that there was no big coming-out or talk about how to label themselves. It is just about two humans falling in love. If you take away the fact that they are gay, the show would also work.
And no targeted homophobia, only the internalised one. It is very exhausting if there is always blatant homophobia in shows, in real-life it is more subtle than that.
Also the show doesn‘t reproduce the heteronormative „the top is the dominant strong man and the bottom is weak and frail“. Both characters have their strengths and their weaknesses. JW helping JH to fit in, helping him to get more confident. And JH is the one demanding open conversations and supports JW in his dark times and in the end JW accepts the support.
I could write so much more but the whole drama with its realistic relationship dynamics and cinematography has just blown me away. It is not a coming of age but more a coming of life, because the themes in this show resonate with a variety of situations.
Maybe it‘s such a good series because it is not pimarily a BL but just a show about love and hurt.

Hi, so i'm currently with a guy who's recently like to avoid talking to me or i thought he'd be.
For context, he used to work and i know he's busy and all. I'm trying to follow his schedule etc just for talking. We've met occasionally but recently since he was unemployed. He has been avoiding me. I was thought that he might have sometimes to talk with me more, since we're new couple (about 3months) and i kinda wanted to know him better. So, sometimes i spammed him just because he's online or posting somewhere and not replying to me. He told me that he doesnt like it.
Before this, i already told him about my fears and his fears too. He was afraid of getting left while he still had feeling and mine's is basically just getting ghosted. Because thats what happened on my last. relationship. At the same time, i was afraid he wasnt moving on.I tried to pull myself one time bcs i feel overwhelmed by waiting for his text and other stuff. He texted me and i was replying with "I was doing that on purpose" with an explanation. and he's mad at me first. then i gave him a complete explaination. He 'seemed' to received it well. Then i talked to him more. as always, im the first one to text and yeah just a single text that receives.
As the time grows, he barely text me. One time, i found out he was going somewhere else bcs it was posted on gay groups and his hornet account and it's triggering me. I was trying to hold it in but i can't help but asked then spamming him again till he replies. I was asking him to meet me but he always said that "he don't have money" yet he comes to his friend coffeeshop. Maybe he's working there as a singer too? I dont know. He told me he sings once. So yeah, thats what i held on through. I wanted to come by and see him. He always said that he's somewhere else or going somewhere else. He doesn't text me back for like a whole day and text me only a good morning/good night thing. sometimes it just a one time text. Whenever i wanted to talked to him, he always in the middle of something. I mean, come on. I had to do something too but at least give me some news or anything.
Probably, it's just my expectation that HE could be different just because he would understood the feeling of getting hurts. Turns me into a toxic person or maybe i'm the one that toxic from the start. I tried to be positive so hard that i had dreamt he replied me and wakes me up fills with joy. only to find out it wasn't real haha.
Oh well, thanks for reading my story. It's all over the place i know since my english is limited but it's good to rant somewhere and stopped myself from crying anymore
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Tl;dr : I texted someone and didnt receive the answers that i expect. Yes, i'm toxic.

We have been together for 2.5 years and lived together for almost 2. We are almos 1 year legal partners.
Due to work and recently moved to a month we country, we have both gained some weight, but since we work out it’s mostly noticeable just on our bellies. I have noticed a decreased interest on our sex life for a while and although I have raised it several times, I eventually let it go, but his reasoning is that he is uncomfortable with his appearance and feeling ugly naked.
A couple of weeks ago I entered his office and saw a work chat with a gay colleague of his that works miles away across the ocean, however I saw some hearts. I brought it up but he said that there is nothing there.
I am against checking your significant other phones as I know it is an invasion of privacy, and he knows that I found out my long time ex boyfriend cheated on me and I found out through his social media and although he confessed, I later continued checking his phone and social media (very toxic).
Back to my current partner story, I couldn’t help it and I checked his phone and saw some messages with this colleague, that although were not sexual or super flirty from my partners end, the colleague said things like “you are hot”, “good morning handsome”, “I hope you had a beautiful weekend, you deserved it”, etc. My partner did compliment him a couple of times though.
Fast forward to last night, he was on a tram building with his regional colleagues, which is fine, but he arrived home quite late for his style for being a weekday event. We share locations so I saw he arrived, so I pretended to be sleeping already to surprise him. To my surprise, it took him around 15min to enter the house and when I saw the location, he was a block away from the house. I waiter a bit longer but I wasn’t feeling ok, I knew something was happening. I went out and confronted him and he was on the phone with his colleague in the middle of the night laughing and when he saw me he said “hey my husband just came to pick me up! Have a good night”, laughed and hung up.
I told him that cheating is not only sexual, there is also emotional cheating and that I didn’t feel good and even less when he knows I have been cheated before. He apologized but I asked to continue the conversation this morning.
Today she showed me his phone and let me check his conversations with his colleague, and asked me not to leave him. I asked to also show me the conversation on social media (that I already saw but he doesn’t know) and he said that he deleted it last night because he felt ashamed, and that I am right, that he unintentionally might have been talking to this guy without thinking of my feelings.
I explained how I felt and now k don’t know what to do.
I still love him like crazy, I think he makes me better and I make him better as well, I asked him to think about what he wants and tell me because I am not sure if I will be able to forgive and/or forget.
Am I overreacting? Technically he didn’t cheat, maybe it was just a platonic fling with a colleague but still.. what should I do?
Extra information: we have discussed several times we are not interested in opening the relationship, and that we both rather break up than cheat and or open it.
P.s i know probably this will only be covered (if ever) on a later episode, so I would like to ask for this community support

My family is upper middle class, and we live very comfortably. We aren't millionaires or anything, but we have a pretty big house with 2 stories and a pool. I have my own room and bathroom as well as my own car. My parents are in a happy marriage, they aren't too strict (i mean I've had my frustrations with them but that's normal I think) they are there for me and I have a good relationship with both of them and with my brother. I don't have to deal with much family drama. I'm also white, cis, straight, and nuerotypical.
None of my friends have all of these privileges. One friend struggles to have good relationships with her parents and doesn't have an escape because she doesn't have a room. Another friend's parents don't support her as she tries to excel academically, so she had to get a job to pay her own school fees. Other friends are gay or trans and have difficulty coming out to their families and have to deal with family drama all the time. Some of them have religious families that have induced religious trauma on them as well (my family is not religious at all). Some others have divorced parents and have to move back and forth all the time.
I'm always a little embarrassed of my cushioned life when I first meet people. I feel like I often get close to them until they feel comfortable coming to me for advice or to vent about the issues I listed above. I support them in the ways I know how and they tell me I make them feel better. But once they find out what my house looks like, I feel like there becomes this distance. Recently I've fallen out of touch with several of my close friends and I fear this is the reason.
I go back and forth between two reactions to this. The first is that I dramaticize the problems I do have because I want to be supported the way I try to support others. This works in the short term but I always feel incredibly guilty for it afterwards because I can't validate my own problems and I feel as though I'm making them up for attention. Also I feel like it widens the distance between me and my friends when they realize I actually have nothing to complain about. I realize this is immature and selfish and when I stopped doing this I reacted by working as much as possible and not allowing myself to have fun. For a year I was either at school, at work, doing homework or asleep. I didn't even let myself have a lunch break - I worked through that too, in the school kitchen handing lunches out to others. That was how I met my friend who was there trying to pay her own school fees, whom I have so much respect for. I felt guilty back then too, because I didn't really need the job or the money, and I thought maybe I should've given the opportunity to someone who needed it more.
In the end I just forgot how to socialize. A few of my classmates invited me to parties and things and I felt so awkward. Socializing and having fun felt so foreign, I didn't know how to relate to my friends or participate in games. Now school is out and I have so much time to myself, even though I still have a job. I just feel so hollow, empty and guilty

I know these books make many uncomfortable and are seen as homophobic. I respect that and apologize for any discomfort. I'm queer myself, and I've read my fair share of romance novels since I was in my teens, but this topic is the type of taboo that fascinates me, especially when it is used to explore tropes you don't get as often. I think it interests me partly because I see myself as mostly gay but sometimes am drawn to women, and there are few outlets for this in fiction beyond drunken sex, let's-make-a-baby, lots of "now you're a real man" homophobia, or some kind of religious awakening.
I'm interested in this from the perspective of a gay man who realizes he's bi and does not just do so in the context of one woman and one woman only, instead being drawn to several women, or curiosity about women in general, even if his main catalyst is one woman. That doesn't have to mean he is all over the place, it can still be one woman, just not the "you and only you" aspect. I'm not a big fan of the "hunky couple whose lives were incomplete without a woman, they're already bi so it's already all go and we don't have to build a relationship beyond banging," trope (I'm aware there are some great books with slow love stories between bi men and women), and also not a big fan of stories where a gay man immediately falls for a woman and is automatically her best lover ever.
I know how narrow that window is. Who's Your Daddy? by Lauren Gallagher is the only one I can think of off the top of my head - where the book starts with a bi guy and his gay boyfriend, the gay boyfriend previously mentioning some curiosity about women, and they have a threesome with a friend of theirs, ultimately leading to a lot of good drama.
Any stories where there is a couple who both start out as gay and then by the end realize they're bi would also interest me, although again I know that's exceedingly rare.

It's been a while since I wanted to comment on this, but I only managed to find the right words now to write this post. Let me start by saying that I generally don't like to get into this kind of subject because I think it's a very boring thing to talk about, but I've seen a lot of people here in this sub who are finding it really difficult to perceive the pretty clear ideological bias that the writers put into the episodes of the series. That's what the so-called "wokeness" is, for those who don't know. If I wasn't very clear, search for a video on YouTube that explains it better, I'm not going to explain this here because it's a topic with many layers and strands, and I already have a lot to talk about here. And honestly, that's a term I don't even like to use, but after watching the whole show, it's impossible for me to deny that HBO's The Last of Us is an absurdly woke Tv Show. So much so that even the director of the show himself gave a statement a while ago that already makes this very clear. For those of you who still think "nah, what they did was just to delve deeper into the plot, it wasn't ideological", the director himself said that he organized the show in a really specific way to deceive you.
Besides that, we really need to talk about EP 8, which pretty much laid bare the doctrinaire bias behind this series. For me, by the time they made a clear and explicit communism apology in EP 6, there was no room for much debate about it. But EP 8 went beyond that, it managed to surpass it. And the funny thing is, a lot of people started saying "Oh, for those who said that Joel was nerfed on the show, what will you say now, huh? Gotcha" as if it was a great argument after the interrogation scene in EP 8. I mean, that scene alone does not change that. The Show Joel still was absolutely nerfed compared to Game Joel. But we'll get to that.
For you to be aware of how impossible it is to criticize this show (which, by the way, has now become the favorite show of many sjws on twitter), I know that many people in this sub did not deal well with the criticism on the show either, but of course it does not even compare to the tantrum that stans throw when someone says anything minimally negative about the show (you know, the same thing the other sub does when someone over there doesn't agree with their opinions). Anyway, for you to be aware, I saw a page on Instagram that tends to have more favorable opinions of these "woke works", posting a text criticizing the show because they didn't think it was as great as everyone said it was. And this page was simply lynched. They even made a post afterwards to recant and at the same time protect themselves from the hate they were getting. So even the ones who are from the same political side can't say a word about TLOU's show. Maybe I'll even make another post later explaining this a little bit more.
But what I really want to talk about now is EP 8, that made one of the most disgusting and absurd changes I've ever seen in an adaptation before, and also this: https://www.thegamer.com/the-last-of-us-director-tricked-people-gay-romance-same-love-episode-three/#:~:text=The%20Last%20of%20Us'%20third,something%20to%20shy%20away%20from.
This is for you who are still saying "oh, but it's not woke because it's not forced". Well, here is the director himself saying that he "tricked" you to promote an LGBTQ story. Here's exactly what he said:
"Sometimes you have to sort of trick the rest of the world into watching these things before they're like, 'Oh, my God, it was two guys. I just realized'" Hoar said in an interview with Inverse. "I think then they might understand that it's all real. It's just the same love."
Here it is. He admitted that he purposely misled the rest of the world to force people to watch a gay romance, referring to EP 3. With that sentence, their objective becomes very clear. It is clear that they did this for ideological purposes. And when a decision is taken with the intention of tricking the audience to sell an ideological narrative and force it (yes, this is forcing, if the director needs to trick you into watching something without you even noticing it at a first view, what else is he doing, if not forcing it on you?), I think that it's pretty clear now for the people who were still trying to be generous and say that the show wasn't woke that yes, it was. And you might think his intentions are beautiful, because "oh, he was just trying to make people who normally wouldn't stop to watch a gay romance to watch it and think that it's okay for two guys to be in love", but is this really the right way to do this kind of political activism? By tricking people into consuming a content that voluntarily they probably wouldn't want to consume? Anyway, about this, the most important part is their confession that their goal was to trick the audience by making the first two episodes about survival and zombies and then make the third episode fully focused on the gay romance to promote their political ideals, in other words, to brainwash you. And there are people falling for it. Really, I even saw people in this sub who'd rather believe that communism could work than admit that The Last of Us's show is being woke by selling ideological messages. People saying "Oh, but in that context, communism would work pretty well" and you're going to tell me that the show isn't succeeding in its indoctrination? If you analyze the model of society described in EP 6, it is quite easy to see that no, it could not work. Maria said that the town was a commune where everything belonged to everyone and everyone took turns at work. That means, you can use everything they have in the city, but you also need to work and take turns, one day you work in the stable, another day you work in the sewer, the next you work on the electrical grid, etc. Fine, it looks very efficient, right? Now imagine if the old lady who works in weaving and in the manufacture of citizens' clothes was put to work on the electricity network? Then the other day, she works making the rounds and patrols. And then the butchery guy starts working on the weaving. Then you round up a bunch of reckless teenagers and put them on patrol (we know well how that ended in Part 2). Then you take the carpenter and put him to work in the kitchen. Can you see why it doesn't make sense? "Oh but you don't necessarily need to have specializations" Well, then we can really talk about communism, since some people need to understand why it doesn't work. If you leave everyone free to do whatever they want, that means, what they feel most able to do, you're going to have a poor allocation of resources. There was even some kind of poll I saw once that asked "What would you want to be in the communist paradise?" and 80% said they would be an artist and the other 20% ranged from being an athlete to anything other than manual labor, nobody wanted to be a street sweeper, but society needs one, not just one btw, a lot. Nobody thought about being an electrician, nobody thought about being a plumber. So it doesn't work for you to let everyone do what they want. That means you'll need what? A very loving little dictator who will designate everyone's work. So if you want to work as a musician, well, that's cool and all, but we need someone to clean the sewers and there is no one else to do this, so... since we don't need your music that much, you can go to the sewers. And see how interesting, in the next EP, Riley (who said the word "fascists" 3 or 4 times throughout the episode) explained that she decided to become a firefly because she didn't like the assignment the "fascists" gave her. She would have to work precisely on the sewers, she didn't want that and decided that joining a terrorist faction was a better option. Oh, so it seems that this kind of model doesn't work either. And if everything belongs to everyone anyway, how many people do you think that wouldn't start loitering, doing a sloppy job, how many wouldn't settle for this stewardship? So, even in a small community, the problems of communism remain. And some people really don't think there is an ideological purpose behind the fact that the only "good" and prosperous civilization in the story is a communist civilization led by a black woman.
For those who keep justifying the fact that Joel was nerfed using the argument that it's because it's "mOrE rEaLiStIc", I find a 53-year-old man in shape kicking ass of a bunch of fungus zombies, much more believable and "realistic" than a communist civilization succeeding, especially in a scenario where resources are scarce. People can't keep the dishes clean in a fraternity room with four people. It's very naive to think that a community of this type is possible, where there's no one who just lives like a leech that sucks from others (and when they can, they get in the way). Imagine yourself in a place where resources are scarce, with you working like a convict while watching a lazy kid sitting on his ass the whole day and being able to use everything you also have the right to use without doing shit because he is always there propped up in the corner pretending to be doing something. And there are many other problems besides that that would not even fit here, but this also brings me back to something else that Drucky didn't consider in his marvelous writing; in a world like TLOU, traditional gender roles would be reinforced. Women would be being protected at all costs and busy taking care of the children while men would be doing the rounds, patrols, security, etc. This is what would make sense, because if we are going to a post-apocalyptic world, where we will have less resources and a broken government, we would be regressing as a society, not progressing. That is, traditional values would become more important, precisely because they were important in times of scarcity, to make society work. Two scrawny teenage girls patrolling alone in an uncharted territory like we saw in Part 2? Give me a break. But anyway, I wanted to bring this point because the game was forced in a few moments, but the show was forced in many more moments. If it was supposed to be realistic, I'm sorry, but it's not. It's not realistic that a feminine leadership like that would be so strong in that context, nor it's realistic the fact that a communist town worked like that. And especially, if you think that Joel needs to be nerfed for the sake of "realism", then it's unrealistic that Ellie can do anything. Because seriously, if you think that a dude in his late 40s doing a lot of physical exertion is unrealistic, how can you think a short, skinny fourteen-year-old girl killing several gun-toting thugs is realistic? Another thing, Ellie learned to be a badass from Joel, she saw him being a badass the whole time in the game and he taught her some lessons on survival. In the show this did not happen. We had few scenes with a badass Joel on the show, there was very little and next to nothing for her to absorb from him. So in the show it's much more forced.
With that, I think we can finally get to EP 8. As I said in the beginning, here we got the most disgusting change to this point. The writers simply decided to take the most hated character from TLOU universe (aside from Abbitch, of course), the character who is probably the shittiest person from the whole story, the character who is basically Dolores Umbridge from TLOU (Harry Potter fans will understand what I'm talking about), the character who is a cannibal, a pedo, a rapist, basically all the most abject things you can have in a human being... they took this guy and turned him into a preacher. Look, I'm sorry if I'm gonna sound harsh right now, but if by EP 8 you still weren't convinced that this series is indeed indoctrinating and wants to brainwash the public, you are stupid. Sorry, but you just are. And if you want a good enough proof that it's just plain stupidity to keep denying that, do an exercise; open up Twitter and search for "christians the last of us" or "christians tlou", seriously, just do this and take a look at the comments and tweets. The most common thing there is people distilling hatred against Christians and people celebrating the fact that the good faction of the story is a communist civilization that worked. Even the stans from twitter understood what this show is about, they got the message, they understood that it was made especially for them. Fuck, if even the most idiotic people alive (sjws from twitter) understood what the show is trying to do and you didn't, you are dumb. I'm saying this to open your eyes, really. Do you actually wanna be dumber than a twitter sjw? Why do you think they were so happy the writers turned the game's most hateful villain and his whole community into Christians? And yet, even taking all of this into context (official statement from the director, communist propaganda, demonization of Christian people), I know that there is someone who will try to justify "oh, but they showed that in the end he didn't even was a real believer, they showed him saying he didn't actually believed it" Exactly! That is part of their critique. What was their intention there? Besides representing Christians as a bunch of sheep who don't even know what is really going on around them, they are guided by a monster who doesn't even believe in what he preaches. And then it comes the argument "oh, but bad Christians do exist, these kind of things happen in real life too" Yeah, and so I have to say once more: Are there bad people out there who are Christians? Yes, there are. But there are also many good people out there who are Christians. And there are many Christian societies that have prospered more than all others. The world's major civilizations were built on Christianity. But here, in HBO's The Last of Us, the best civilization was built on Marx while the worst was made on a Christian basis? In fact, there were also two things that I saw people say and that I had not realized, but that is no longer more than an assumption, which would be the fact that Bill had the Gadsden flag, so they showed him as a libertarian and that would supposedly be a good thing, but a lot of people said that it was actually a critique saying that at the end of the day, a libertarian is nothing more than a very closeted guy who just wants some D. As I said, that's just a presumption, but honestly, I think that was more likely their intention than praising libertarianism. And the other thing is that the show only develops LGBT romance. We got two whole episodes just focused on LGBT romance and no development on any straight couple. And here's the thing, so far we only had LGBT kisses on the show (a gay kiss and a lesbian kiss), the only straight kiss was that frightful kiss from EP 2 between Tess and a runner. And that was such an uncomfortable and unnecessary scene that I also do not doubt that there was also a message behind it, like, the only straight kiss from the whole show is something grotesque and bizarre. Would there be some meaning behind it? Well, I don't know, I can't say for sure as it's not as clear as the rest was. But the show was already as woke as it could get and these changes have no purpose, NONE, there just isn't a good enough justification for any of the changes the show has made. Turning the game's cannibals into a Christian sect added NOTHING, absolutely nothing to the story, it doesn't give David or his community a greater development, it's just pure mockery, it's gratuitous, it is simply their desire to attack Christianity, which is without a doubt, one of woke's main concerns. And the attacks on Christianity in recent years have been more and more successful, so much that I'm pretty sure there are many people on this sub who also don't like Christians, who also have a lot of prejudice against them. And that's a prejudice that nobody seems to have much trouble voicing, nobody feels bad talking shit about Christians, after all, they deserve it, don't they? Look, you may have known a lot of Christians who were dicks to you, but I'm sure you know a lot of Christians who are nice. Sometimes, you don't even know that a person you like so much is a Christian, but they are. It is very likely that in your family you have Christians who are good people, whether your grandparents, uncles, aunts or even your parents. Speaking for myself, I know a lot of wonderful people who are Christians and lots of the most correct and kind people I have ever met are Christians. So, that makes me think it's bizarre to have this normalization of hatred against Christians that is done all over the media.
I was obviously expecting season 2 of the show to be more "woke" and shit given what we already have in Part 2, but this first season was way worse than I expected. And I say "worse" in the ideological sense, because I do recognize quality in the show from a technical standpoint. The photography and cinematography are surprisingly good and the moments of tension are well done, although I do have a few other issues with it that I plan to address in another post, such as the fact that it had almost no infected in the show at all. And precisely because of this whole ideological propaganda in a way that a lot of people can't perceive it, I say that this show is actually dangerous, because it's quite easy to identify "wokeness'' in shows like She-Hulk and Velma, because it's not only explicit, but also poorly made. So if you think something poorly written is bad and pure ideology, it's a bit simpler to understand and not so problematic to joke about it as everyone else has also noticed it. But when a Tv Show is extremely well produced and conveys all of those messages in a way that no one will notice it, then it starts to be a real issue. I mean, you can like the show all you want, but at least recognize what these people are trying to shove down your throat.
Anyway, that's just my opinion and I wanted to share it with you guys.

My family is upper middle class, and we live very comfortably. We aren't millionaires or anything, but we have a pretty big house with 2 stories and a pool. I have my own room and bathroom as well as my own car. My parents are in a happy marriage, they aren't too strict (i mean I've had my frustrations with them but that's normal I think) they are there for me and I have a good relationship with both of them and with my brother. I don't have to deal with much family drama. I'm also white, cis, straight, and nuerotypical.
None of my friends have all of these privileges. One friend struggles to have good relationships with her parents and doesn't have an escape because she doesn't have a room. Another friend's parents don't support her as she tries to excel academically, so she had to get a job to pay her own school fees. Other friends are gay or trans and have difficulty coming out to their families and have to deal with family drama all the time. Some of them have religious families that have induced religious trauma on them as well (my family is not religious at all). Some others have divorced parents and have to move back and forth all the time.
I'm always a little embarrassed of my cushioned life when I first meet people. I feel like I often get close to them until they feel comfortable coming to me for advice or to vent about the issues I listed above. I support them in the ways I know how and they tell me I make them feel better. But once they find out what my house looks like, I feel like there becomes this distance. Recently I've fallen out of touch with several of my close friends and I fear this is the reason.
I go back and forth between two reactions to this. The first is that I dramaticize the problems I do have because I want to be supported the way I try to support others. This works in the short term but I always feel incredibly guilty for it afterwards because I can't validate my own problems and I feel as though I'm making them up for attention. Also I feel like it widens the distance between me and my friends when they realize I actually have nothing to complain about. I realize this is immature and selfish and when I stopped doing this I reacted by working as much as possible and not allowing myself to have fun. For a year I was either at school, at work, doing homework or asleep. I didn't even let myself have a lunch break - I worked through that too, in the school kitchen handing lunches out to others. That was how I met my friend who was there trying to pay her own school fees, whom I have so much respect for. I felt guilty back then too, because I didn't really need the job or the money, and I thought maybe I should've given the opportunity to someone who needed it more.
In the end I just forgot how to socialize. A few of my classmates invited me to parties and things and I felt so awkward. Socializing and having fun felt so foreign, I didn't know how to relate to my friends or participate in games. Now school is out and I have so much time to myself, even though I still have a job. I just feel so hollow, empty and guilty

First of all, I (24M) really appreciate having a community like this. I'm glad to know I'm not alone in feeling uncertain about my sexuality or finding both men and women attractive. The mental back and forth sucks sometimes, but I'm glad I'm not the only one who goes through that.
After this post, I think I'm going to take a break from this subreddit. I've realized I come here or to other queer subreddits to retell my story and being assured in this sexuality or another. I sometimes even go over my story mentally for evidence that I'm this sexuality or another. I'm going back to counseling soon, and I plan to talk about this.
Before I take that break, I had this realization that I wanted to share. I've been going to church since I was 11 years old. My denomination, like many others, teaches that being anything other than heterosexual is sinful. I fully believed that until I was 16, when I first liked another boy. That made me start wondering if that belief was BS and it's totally fine that I love men. What kept me from exploring my sexuality was that fear of sinning against God. I was also afraid of people I cared about turning their backs on me. That fear is still with me six years later.
Personally, I'm okay with being bisexual, gay, straight, asexual, etc. It doesn't change anything about who I am as a person. However, I worry about how other people would react if I had a boyfriend I was deeply in love with. Would they sit me down for another series of Bible studies to get through to me? Would they turn their noses at me when they saw me? If I were to marry another man, would they crumple up my invitations? I already had a bad dream last fall that I had to essentially catfish my congregation to come to my wedding (they were no thrilled when they realized my partner was a man).
I think that's why I've experienced so much confusion. When I first started being interested in men, I tried to think about girls to "correct" myself. I didn't want others to be disappointed that I had an interest in men, so I kept those thoughts to myself. Sometimes I would confess my "unclean" thoughts and pray with others that God would deliver me from temptation. At the same time, I wondered why this has to be a problem in the first place. How would two men loving each other hurt anyone?
Sometimes I wonder if people knew I was queer, they would think twice about how they view queer people. If I'm someone they care about and they saw me with another man I really loved, maybe they'd support me. However, I have reason to suspect that's not how things wod go. As soon as I opened up about being attracted to men, my friend and my campus minister sat me down for some Bible studies about rejecting my urges. It has made me wonder if their love for me is conditional on me being a good little church boy. At the very least, my immediate family will love whoever I love, male or female. Some people can't say the same.
The good thing is I don't have to have this all sorted right now. I'm still figuring out who I am, what my identity is. I'm okay with not having my first partner until I'm in my late 20s or early 30s. By then I hope to have a better understanding of myself.

Hey again ya’ll! Sorry that I post so much, it’s just everytime I do post, I end up finding new people no matter my consistency. So hi! I’m 18, a gay male, looking for someone under 30 :) I write horror stories, I draw fictional characters (from shows or games), and I can play the electric piano. <3

Hey again ya’ll! Sorry that I post so much, it’s just everytime I do post, I end up finding new people no matter my consistency. So hi! I’m 18, a gay male, looking for someone under 30 :) I write horror stories, I draw fictional characters (from shows or games), and I can play the electric piano. <3

Hey again ya’ll! Sorry that I post so much, it’s just everytime I do post, I end up finding new people no matter my consistency. So hi! I’m 18, a gay male, looking for someone under 30 :) I write horror stories, I draw fictional characters (from shows or games), and I can play the electric piano. <3

Hey again ya’ll! Sorry that I post so much, it’s just everytime I do post, I end up finding new people no matter my consistency. So hi! I’m 18, a gay male, looking for someone under 30 :) I write horror stories, I draw fictional characters (from shows or games), and I can play the electric piano. <3

Hey again ya’ll! Sorry that I post so much, it’s just everytime I do post, I end up finding new people no matter my consistency. So hi! I’m 18, a gay male, looking for someone under 30 :) I write horror stories, I draw fictional characters (from shows or games), and I can play the electric piano. <3