Why does my vuse not hit

I am looking to buy a decent 125cc vehicle that does occasional touring apart from City riding. Basically an all rounder kind of a vehicle.
Honda SP125:
It a good bike which has Honda's proven reliability, very good mileage if riding single but I have watched some of the owner's review and they all say this motorcycle wobbles a lot on open roads and it also gives very bad mileage if there's pillion involved on ride. This motorcycle also has plastic parts ("Honda" Badging) on its Engine instead of traditional metal part near the foot rest.
TVS Raider:
Motorcycle looks over the top funky which really isn't my preference tbh but I have heard its one of the best in 125cc segments. It provides less mileage though. Refinement is meh. Also had a bad experience with previous TVS ownership. The quality aspect of the parts used is not that great IMHO based on previous ownership.
This are the only two 125cc motorcycles I have inquired at the showroom at the moment.
Suzuki Access 125:
Haven't tried a scooter extensively. I had used friend's Honda Activa just once for a short distance. Reviewers say its best in 125cc segment and provides good mileage (Not sure about the mileage with Pillion). It has very less weight but some professional reviewer say it maintains its stability on the open road (Is it correct?). Smaller wheels. Smaller 5L Tank. Is Engine reliable like the Honda ones that requires very less maintenance. Do people do occasional long rides on a scooter? Is it okay health wise?
I'm 30+ guy with a lean physique and don't have any back pain problem as of yet.
My Budget is max 1.10L as I'm buying it with my own salary and Intending to keep it for long time. Need maximum help I can get to make an informed decision this time. Thanks

So I got assigned a sort of coach that helps me with my day to day activities after I had a burnout. The thing is, she is not specifically trained on autism.
I already told the people picked the coach I preferred a specific autism coach, but the qaiting lists where really long, so I opted for the general coach in the meantime, maybe I would be pleasantly suprised.
On the first meeting with my coach, I immediately told her I maybe wanted to switch later to an autism coach, but that I was still thankful she could help me.
So fastforward a few weeks, we have been working together and talking, and I notice I'm missing some knowledge related to autism from her, which is understandable since she doesn't have the specialisation.
So I told her I would like to switch and am taking action to do so. But now she keeps asking me if I think she isn't qualified enough and doesn't have enough knowledge on autism. She also told me her colleague has done a course on autism, so maybe I could switch to her colleague, but doing a course is very different from being a actual autism coach. After she told me she thinks autism coaches might not have done a course on autism??
I don't really understand why she keeps asking me these things and questioning herself. From my perspective, I was very clear in what I wanted and didn't make it personal. Is there some better way I could have handled this? Does anybody have a similar experience?

Are vaginas disliked in real life as much as people online say that they are?
I am reclusive and on Reddit I learned that people in general believe that men commonly sexualise and fetishize women who have penises, whereas women and gay men don't commonly sexualise and fetishize men who have vaginas
I learned that people in general believe that oral sex is much more performed on men than performed on women. And that this has nothing to do with men being selfish, since gay men are also male and are not known at all to have issues giving oral to men
I learned that people in general believe that vaginas are seen as gross, taboo and have stigma. Also periods too. And that gay men are more openly disgusted by and insulting towards vaginas than lesbians are towards penises. Also that lesbians commonly watch gay porn and are more open to transgender women who have penises
I learned that people in general believe men are more attracted to a performance or costume of femininity than they are to actual women. So overweight women, non feminine women and women who don't shave are more of a turn off than feminized men who look like women
I learned that vaginas are not appreciated as much as large penises, boobs and butts are. And that men are obsessed with anal and eating ass
That sex is seen to be all about the penis, so lesbian sex has it's validity questioned whereas anal (like between gay men) doesn't, so vaginas are less valued. Also that bisexual people often prefer penises
I learned that femdom is mostly about penis imitation in the form of strap ons and pegging
When I asked my parents, sister and psychologist about these things they said the vast majority of men have no interest in transgender women pre op nor post op, that oral sex is pretty much 50/50 between women and men, that vaginas and periods are not seen as gross/taboo, that men are not more attracted to femininity than they are to women and that vaginas are appreciated as much as the others, etc. Basically they said nothing that I read online and wrote above is true for the vast majority of people
So, why does everyone online say vaginas are pretty much disliked and unappreciated, in general? These beliefs come up often and are part of f eminist discourse
Also people on Reddit often ask why I care so much & how it effects me. Why do they ask that? Of course I care what I am surrounded by in society, everytime I leave the house. Humans are social creatures. Are most women fine with having to find the needle in the haystack? And not put off by this? I always wanted to ask how the feminist women who believe these things (like that vaginas are seen as gross in society) still feel sexual and still want sex with men, since most of them can often be sex positive too.

What is the G4 project? What does it entail? Is it still apart of my IA grades, or not?
Yes, I’ve messaged my coordinator.
H a l p.
Thanks!

Not sure if this is the right subreddit so redirect me if it's not, but I'm trying to find a reason for me overreacting to certain situations.
I don't overreact to things in general, I'm not very emotional person and that is why I really dislike this aspect of my personality as it interferes with my ability to do things.
When I was younger I'd get a very strong physical reaction (shaking, sweating, nausea) to my teachers shouting at me when I wasn't able to do something. As well as when I was doing my driver's license and messed up and the instructor would shout at me then I'd get the same reaction.
I don't think it's about the experience of being yelled at because I can endure that just fine but more about being reprimanded for a lack of skill or capability. Everyone messes up at times but their reaction is not as strong as mine and I would like to hear your opinions on why I have this problem.

I discussed the things that I read online and on Reddit about sexism, with my parents, sister and psychologist
Everybody online says (in so many words) basically that women like men more than men like women and in a more well rounded way
My parents, sister (who identifies as a feminist) and psychologist answered some of my questions and they told me:
That most people don't think that women like men more than men like women & in a more well rounded way. They said most people don't think that if you took sex away, men would instead prefer other men in all other ways (because they don't think men are superior to women.) They said boomer men and male comedians who make jokes about hating their wives also have as many equivalents of wives making jokes about hating their husbands
That most people think that sexism is more common towards women but not sooo much more common and that sexism is not about hating women, it's about men having had the physical power in the past to exert strength to gain control. Also that sexism towards men is not just a thing as backlash of sexism towards women
And that traditional roles for women, women in history and women in Muslim countries are not believed by most people as meaning women are inferiolesser, and are instead seen as different but equal. So men worked and women had just as important a role in raising a family. And just like women weren't seen as capable to do men's roles, men weren't seen as capable to do women's roles even if they didn't enjoy work and wanted to spend more time with their children. And most people don't think traditional roles mean women were there to serve men or defined by relationships to men, since men were expected to marry and work to support them
They also said most people don't think that violence against women is a hatred of women. And that it's instead about testosterone (men being more violent) power, control and women being easier targets
They also said most people don't think that men objectify women while women don't objectify men nor that women respect men more (and treat them better) than men do towards women
They said most people don't think that women/girls hate each other, compete, get jealous, be catty and b itchy, form cliques, become mean girls, have internalised misogny and want to be "cool girls" while men have deeper friendships, bonds, bromances and camaraderie
And they said that most people think that boy's clubs in work places like the police also have girl's club equivalents and that men are not held to lower standards/praised for the bare minimum in typically female jobs, roles and hobbies (gay male makeup artists, drag queens, fathers spending time with their kids), while women have to prove themselves and are held to higher standards in typically male jobs, roles and hobbies. And that women don't support and praise gay men more than they (and straight men) do lesbians
What do you think? If the people in my life are wrong, and if the internet is right that most women accept that women like men more than men like women, in a more well rounded way and always have...then I want nothing to do with men or women: working with them in a job setting, surrounded by couples in public, being friends with them nor having relationships with them. Because it's pathetic, desperate and unrequited love. It put me off men completely, I lost all attraction and I dunno why it doesn't for the women who believe and accept these things and think that they have to find the needles in the haystack.

This is rant regarding the really annoying behaviour of beggars. This happened to me two times, where in a beggar hit my car window really hard enough to get a scratch on it, and when I ignored her, she did it again with full force! Just today the same thing happened but with a different beggar. Like what the hell is this nonsense! They’re attitude is I’m entitled to your money. Where do I complain about this? I’m not trying to sound elitist or anything, but it’s seriously unnerving to have someone whack your car window so hard to damage it. Has anyone else faced this?

Are older women really as unappreciated as people online say that they are?
(I'm reclusive)
My parents, sister and psychologist all told me that most people don't believe that men in general prefer younger women (when it comes to physical beauty and sex)
And that most people don't believe that physical beauty is mostly about how much younger you are nor how much younger you look
Yet online and on Reddit, etc the majority seem to think that these opinions of the people in my life...are wrong. Why would the online world's views be different to real life views on this topic?
And why would women (as they age) still be attracted to men and accept it if they thought men prefer younger women, etc? That's like unrequited one sided love or something and kind of pathetic
Also people on Reddit often ask why I care so much & how it effects me. Why do they ask that? Of course I care what I am surrounded by in society, everytime I leave the house. Humans are social creatures. Do most women just accept that they have to find the needle in the haystack? And are not put off by this? I need to know because I will want nothing to do with men and women if most accept & believe this and if most women then stay attracted to men despite this.

Has anyone else had this? I'm playing on an Xbox one S and it could just be my Xbox but this has happened twice now and I'd like to know if it's just me or not. Literally can't get that sweet sweet round 100 because of this.
This time i caught it happening and it triggered immediately after I fired the apothicon servant. Can my Xbox not handle it???
I've tried just waiting it out in hopes it would fix itself but it never does, and it can't be a frame issue because the points on the bottom left corner are still normal when I shoot zombies.
(No this isn't your device lagging in the slightest this is actual footage.)
End my suffering

My world, Arcadia, has one of the biggest religions - abbainism. They believe the monotheistic god-creator, Abba Ina, is the core of the planet, is underground, which is why plants come from the ground, why dead people are consumed by the ground, why riches are found underground etc. All comes from Abba Ina and returns to Abba Ina. (Why did they know and accept the planet being round for this long, I don't know). Thus, by this logic, equivalent of Heaven should be underground, and similarly being in Hell would be being far from Abba Ina, up there, in the void of space.
With this religious context, I can get to the second thing - the three kyrioi (singular - kyrios) of Law, Truth and Justice, that are basically the messiahs of abbainism. First kyrios, Afraz, is the founder of the main church, but who I wanna focus on here is kyrios of Truth, Gotfryd, and the supposed miracle he performed that granted him the worldwide consideration of being a kyrios.
Gotfryd von Schilling was the royal guard captain in Arcadia's equivalent of middle ages, in the year 1160 of Coronation Era, answering directly to Cydonia's king, Sebastian I. Gotfryd was tasked with investigating a series of peculiar murders of the nobility in the capital city, Apolonia. Circumstances made him the prime suspect and eventually king Sebastian sentenced him to being burned on a stake. During the execution however, as it is said by the holy texts, Gotfryd allegadely turned into a black pegasus and fleed the stake. It was later considered to be a proof of his innocence, and the miracle along with a few other circumstances made the Church officially consider him the second kyrios, the kyrios of Truth.
But now I'm thinking - alleged murderer turns into a black magical creature (devillish?) amidst hellish fire and flies into the sky (away from Abba Ina) during his execution. Why would people consider it a proof of holiness? This story is important, since it influenced Cydonia's symbols, since then the flag and emblem show a black pegasus surrounded by flames. So why would medieval people consider it a good thing? Does anyone have an idea? Or should I change it? Can't say I'm not emotionally bound with the idea.
It's not as important, but maybe I should specify, Gotfryd was really innocent. But the whole shtick about the miracle is not historically confirmed, at least not as actual godly interference, since abbainism isn't and never will be confirmed as the true religion of Arcadia.

My yard is small only 1/4 acre so I was looking into one of those old rear engine riding mowers. IF I can find one for sale, it's usually not working or for parts and costs around $200-300. On the rare occasion I do find one in "ready to mow" condition, people are asking ridiculous prices like close to $1K or more, especially if it's a Snapper brand.
I can find used lawn tractors for a few hundred all day long, why are the rear engine ones so expensive?

Hi, I'm a guy.
If you're a gal, and you're looking for a guy, then that's a great start, keep reading.
A little about me; I have hobbies, lots of hobbies.
I have a pretty extensive workshop where I dabble in everything from blacksmithing to bookbinding.
I have a thing for interesting historical objects and clothing. I make most of my own props and outfits for the work that I do at various festivals around the country.
I love hiking, kayaking, cycling, reading, martial arts, music, good food, and deep conversations about the mysteries of the universe. I'm far from being a health nut, but definitely trying to take better care of myself these days. I have a slowly growing tattoo collection as well.
I'm an entertainer by trade. I perform at Renaissance fairs, music festivals, and on the fringes of society. I'm known for eating fire, juggling crystal balls like David Bowie, and twisting balloon animals, but primarily I am an illusionist. A conjurer, prestidigitator. A Magician.
Yes, that's my real job, and it rocks.
I'm also teaching myself to shoot and edit video because I've always wanted to make movies. I have a few small projects out there, and just started a podcast as well, but there's still a long way to go.
What I'm looking for in a partner:
I'm a long-term relationship kinda guy. Not into hookups. Maybe that's strange, but it's just how I am. I've been single for a few years, and I'm ready to find something serious and meaningful.
I have lots to give and I'm searching for someone else who does as well.
I can appreciate different types of women, but my ideal match would be Caucasian, medium to fit build, 25-38 years old, with no children (I don't have any) but might want them someday with the right person.
She should be self-motivated and ambitious, but not too busy to spend time together. Sorry gamers, life is too short so spend it in front of a screen.
I'm not into hard partying, anymore, for the most part. Social drinking and 420 are still cool, but I've outgrown my wild phase so I'm hoping you can jive with that.
If you are kind, adventurous, loyal, unvaccinated, and at least semi-traditional then you should definitely consider getting to know an awesome person like me.
My goals for the next 3-5 years include learning more about natural/herbal medicines and horticulture. I have a green thumb and I would like to find a place to settle down and start a homestead with a special lady and grow most of our food and medicine in the garden.
I have a few business projects in the works that will supplement my sometimes-seasonal income from performing, and my hopes are that I can do much of my work from home in the future. I travel quite a bit, and I love it, but it gets old sometimes when you HAVE TO do it.
So, I guess that's a start anyway. If you want to know more, you'll just have to reach out and start the conversation.
Maybe attach a pic as well, so at least I know you're an actual human and not an assassin android from the future. I learned my lesson there.
My name is Jesse. Have a great day!

Hello! I'm happy to officially announce Dispatch, a new experience for your TV. To start, here are some screenshots, a demo video, as well as a website to sign up for the beta. Later down, you'll find some more info about the app and my plans for it. Feel free to ask any other questions in the comments!
Screenshots
Demo video note: screen recording introduces a certain amount of stutter that is not present in the actual app
Sign up for the beta!
-----------------------------------
What is it? Dispatch is a new launcher for Android TV devices (with more devices coming) that will integrate directly with your existing media services, such as Plex. Dispatch aims to provide a unique, immersive, and media focused experience on the largest screens in your home. Also note: the app will function completely fine as a standalone app. Using it as a launcher is optional.
Will there be ads? Dispatch will launch with a 7 or 14 day trial or something like that. After which, users will have the option to pay for either a monthly or a lifetime subscription. Users who have an active subscription will never ever ever see an ad in this app. I don't even have any concrete plans for a completely free version, however, if a free version does land in the future, I imagine it will be ad-supported (though I'm open to suggestions. In fact, I have some novel ideas I might try out first before going down that route)
How much will it cost? I haven't decided yet. Feel free to dm me or leave a comment indicating what price you think would be appropriate.
What platforms will it support? To start, Dispatch will be available on Android TV devices only. In the future, I plan to release versions for Fire TV, tvOS, Samsung Tizen, Windows, Linux, and macOS. The project was architected from the start to be on as many platforms as possible. That being said, I will be focusing on the Android TV experience for now.
What services will it support? Plex first, with Jellyfin, Emby and other cool stuff planned for the future.
Can it play media directly? Not for now. The first versions of Dispatch will simply launch the appropriate app at the appropriate location within said app. Adding my own media player is a top priority, however, it will take some time to get it right.
When can I try it? I'm hoping a first beta release can be ready in the next 3–5 weeks. If you want to help test the app out and provide feedback, sign up here!
Stay tuned! I'm very excited about this project, and I hope some of you will be too!

Hey, I haven't used Bumble in awhile, but think I may have gotten catfished by a match if someone can help me out...
My match and I had been talking for the last three days, and she was very responsive and engaged in messaging. At the moment, she claims to be traveling and we said we'd either do a video call or meet when she returned, and she would send pictures from her travels along the way. Pictures all looked real -- mostly selfies of her at the beach wearing a hat and nothing too suspicious. Last night, she inexplicably exited the conversation and when we had last spoke the night earlier, she said she looked forward to talking soon.
But then it hit me: If someone is traveling, then they would need to be using travel mode to show up in the location they typically live in to match with me locally, so doesn't it display that on their profile in blue text with a luggage icon? Her profile's radius stayed within the same city and radius despite her travels, and it did not say travel mode. According to Bumble, it says "Your location will show as being in the center of the city you've chosen (at this time you will not be able to select an exact location) and an indicator will display so other users know you're using Travel." Out of curiosity, I Googled her first name, the job title listed in her Bumble profile, and the location of her Bumble location, and I was surprised that it very easily brought me her professional profile on LinkedIn and various professional contact sites since she works in the healthcare industry. Still, if she was using travel mode to keep her local matches in tact while away, then her profile would have stated that she was in Florida yesterday and today and then a travel mode distance of the city within our state she otherwise lives, and it did not. There's no work around on Bumble to cover that up that I know of.
I'm wondering if the person was catfishing, but nothing from the conversation felt particularly "off" at the same time. Is there a way to display a location you are not actually in without using travel mode?

I (23F) do not want to attend my sister's (24F) wedding happening next year with her fiancé (27M).
For privacy reasons, I'll refer to my sister as Bella and her fiancé as Jacob (intentional twilight reference because they should not be together). There are many elements to this story but I will summarise it to my best ability.
Backstory: All my life, there was domestic and religious violence including emotional manipulation and physical harassment from both my parents, which forced me to run away from home for a second time 4 years ago. In the past few years, I've been working on becoming financially independent, continuing my degree, addressing my mental health issues (which my parents deny existed), and maintaining a distance between my parents and I.
Last year, Bella was freshly out of a breakup and met Jacob, who quickly became her 'religious mentor' and 'helped her' through her breakup. BTW I am agnostic after having religion shoved down my throat but don't care about other people's religious beliefs. Initially, I had good thoughts about Jacob because he wanted to strengthen her beliefs, but when I found out that Bella started a relationship with him after he told her that her name came to him in prayer, I immediately told her to run.
Here are dot points of almost every red flag:
- He 'scolded' Bella when she spent a Sunday in the ER instead of at church
- He forced Bella to tell my parents about the relationship after one month knowing that my parents will expect a marriage
- He convinced my parents that marrying a man this religious would give Bella a 'blessing'
- He wants 11 kids but isn't financially stable
- Bella is currently in the 6th year of her 3-year degree due to stress and anxiety, and he is a drop-out because he 'doesn't like studying'
- He is forcing the marriage even though she expressed multiple times that she does not want to marry so early
- To add a cherry on top, he gave me a religious scripture for my birthday saying that I should 'reconsider'
My last straw was when he invited my parents to the engagement party, which he promised would only consist of his siblings and mine. Bella's requirement was that I was there, and mine was that my parents weren't. He believed he could reunite our family that night.
I feel like I've lost all the privacy I had built for myself. My parents have seen my car's make/model/registration, they know where I work (he told them) and probably know where I live since he has dropped me home before. I do not trust this man after a very clear boundary was crossed and I have now blocked him and told him 'very kindly' to stay away from me. I responded with aggression which has now ruined my relationship with him (not complaining). I keep in contact with my sister because she was unaware that my parents would be coming, and she ignores the fact that I hate Jacob (I know deep down she probably does too).

Hello! If you’re a female and would like chat , please message me anytime. It’s just the beginning of my weekend for me and I’m already feeling lonely. Mostly because my dog does not know how to hold a conversation. Sorry guys but I’ve just always gotten along better with ladies.
Just message me and we can talk about anything.

Sorry if this post is all over the place; it's my first time posting on reddit. I thought I might describe the whole relationship we had and what went down, in case it changed the etiquette. I'll put the beginning of the current situation and the actual issue in bold if someone wants to skip the massive backstory.
So, the thing is, I (now 24F) became really close friends with a girl (now 23F) from my grup at university 3 years ago. We were both good students, liked similar things, watched some of the same movies and shows, loved cats etc., so we quickly bonded. We became nearly inseparable, we studied together, shared all our notes, hung out after classes, I met her gf and spent time with them, and when they unfortunately broke up, I did everything I could to support my friend (and I was really really worried about her mental health, I got like 3 hours of sleep that first night between physically staying with her and then texting, I started inviting her to my family outings etc.), eventually (near the end of the friendship last year) I was even invited to spend a week at her house with her family and while I was there, I was also invited to her older sister's wedding that was happening about a month later (a lot of people started saying they wouldn't attend so the thought was that if I came, then at least some of the money wouldn't go to waste, I suppose).
While things started off great, they changed over time. Like I mentioned, she got that gf and I didn't have the time for dating and wasn't even particularly interested in the guys around me to begin with. She also got cats and then fostered kittens. So her life got busier while mine didn't, and I understood that. The workload of sharing notes started shifting to where I was doing increasingly more. But I was doing it mainly for myself anyway, so I saw no harm in sharing what I had.
But I'm not going to lie, it started getting more and more irritating. Sometimes we'd agree to split the questions between the two of us 50/50 and the day before the test she'd text me saying she wouldn't be able to do her part because she had had a migraine (I got that) and then she took her cats for a long walk, and also her new gf showed up at her place too (that I didn't get). By the time I finished the whole thing, she was asleep and read what I had prepared in the morning. Whatever.
Things started getting bad a year and a half ago, around the time of her sister's wedding. I live in the city where we study but she only rents a flat for the two semesters and goes home halfway across the country for any longer breaks. She was looking for a new place and I went to see one of the flats for her but ultimately, it fell through. Later, she found a place and decided to take it without sending me there to look at it - but she did ask me to get the keys from the owner. It happened the day before I was leaving for that wedding so I could take the keys with me. I agreed no problem but then she changed her mind, calling the whole thing off - only to change it again after a few hours. I told her it's okay but to please let me know earlier if we're ever in a similar situation again (I still had to pack, also it was quite some distance for me to travel so I lost about an hour on public transport, and ofc I had to buy myself tickets - but I didn't mention any of that). Which apparently was a wrong thing to say 'cause she got mad and started ignoring my text messages, including the ones where I asked what time I was supposed to meet the owner (I didn't have the lady's number). When she finally responded, she said she didn't know. Always one to placate others, I started politely asking her to please find out because I didn't want the owner to wait for me, blah blah blah. Eventually, we figured it out, I handled it and went back to preparing.
The wedding was a disaster in itself. It involved her absurdly creepy cousin who clearly had never spoken to a girl and after just 1 day was convinced we were in love and would be together. I understand she found my following her irritating but I didn't really know anyone else and I was freaked out by the cousin - and her egging him on didn't help xd One of the instances was when he kept openly staring at me (y'know how when you look at somebody and they look your way, you look away? well, he didn't) and I decided to kind of show him I wasn't there specifically as his plus one, so I asked my friend's plus one (he's gay and we had met a few times before) to go dance with me, and he was happy to go with me - but my friend said that no, he was there with her and I could go dance with the cousin. And when I finally snapped and glared at her and said firmly but quietly (so no one else could hear) to stop (she was laughing about how he and I should get a photo together for the wedding photobook), she got mad at me. Well, fine, it was just a few hours, I could sit at the table and endure the creepy staring, it's not like he'd try anything with everyone watching. My friend's plus one had a cold or something so I decided to leave with him. Apparently, she was upset that we left so early. The next day, she wasn't speaking to me until we had to leave for the afterparty and did some shopping together etc. But during the party she kept to her sister and her bff and I didn't want to cause any more trouble between us so I stayed on my own - until the cousin showed up. Now, I'm the type of person who freezes when in a sudden, stressful situations, and that's exactly what happened. He tried holding my hands, again stared at me, didn't realise my constant fiddling with my phone was an indication that I didn't want to spend time with him, and generally made this whole day miserable for me. I was so stressed out I couldn't even eat anything. In the evening, hours later, my friend realised what was happening and decided to drive me to her house early. Ofc he tagged along but she made sure to take him back with her. He kept texting me, saying he was going to go to the train station the next morning to see me off and that he would soon come to my city to visit me, and he could stay at my place while he was there. The next day, my friend's mom drove me to the station (my friend woke up too late to go), and once I was on the train, I blocked him. I also texted with my friend and found out that she, as well as her other cousins who sat at our table at the wedding, had approached the dude to tell him to stop but he ignored them. They eventually got his parents involved and that was why he wasn't at the train station. It made me feel much better about the whole thing, since she didn't abandon me like I thought she had. And again, I understand I was kinda a nuisance - a shy stranger at a family gathering.
After that, things were good for a while. But then, the classes started again and it was becoming stressful and taxing again. We have extracurricular classes we have to attend, and our group needed to prepare a short "article" on a topic we chose. I wrote the whole thing but asked the others to please read through it and let me know if they were okay with what I managed so I could send it to the teacher (they did). I also reached out to my friend and asked her specifically to let me know when she had a moment to read it because I valued her opinion a little bit more, since she would tell me if she didn't like something and the others wouldn't (it wasn't even 2 pages long), and she told me she would. Well, she never did, she started sending me memes and talking about the tests she re-took instead. So at the end of the day (the deadline), I asked her how her test went but because I was quite fed up, I didn't stop myself from adding, "thanks btw. next time, let me know you don't feel like doing something we agreed on so I won't have to wait unnecessarily". Should I have just ignored it and went on with my life? Yeah, sure. But I was angry and I don't think what I said was all that bad. Well, to her it was.
I had already noticed she didn't like any sort of critique of herself, even if it was something like us disagreeing on how to perform an experiment (the difference between us was that I had read the instruction). I suppose we both instinctively assume a bit more of a leadership role and sometimes we clashed because of that. She would get very defensive, and I suppose I did too. But in this particular instance, she clearly misunderstood me and an actual argument ensued. What I wanted to say was that I didn't like what our dynamic was, how I was doing so much and was held to those previous standards while she changed her mind whenever she felt like it, was much less reliable and I had to accommodate her almost all the time. But she seemed to think I was looking for gratitude for some reason? That's not what I care about at all; whenever I had some notes or excel sheets or whatever before the rest of the group, I always shared it on our group chat, and never expected thanks or anything. When I discuss a question that may be on a test with somebody, once I find the correct answer, I send it to them, even if it's days later, simply because they wanted to know at one point. I don't care about gratitude and in fact, it makes me uncomfortable. I want to have a good relationship with everyone and if my openness with sharing means that in the future when I need some help, I can go ask one of those people and they will willingly help me, that's an added bonus. Idk why my friend would ever think that but once I realised there was that misunderstanding, I tried to explain what I meant before trying to placate her.
She, however, was really mad, and said a bunch of really hurtful stuff. That, in turn, made me remind her of how she had treated me at the wedding (apparently I was still salty about her initially egging her cousin off), and that prompted her to say that she never wanted me at that wedding in the first place and that I inject myself wherever I can. Now, I never told this to anyone other than my very best friend, but I think I might be somewhere on the autism spectrum and I really don't know how to read between the lines. It's not clear to me what's appropriate and what isn't. So when her mother came up with the idea of me coming to the wedding, my friend's sister gave me an invitation and my friend encouraged me to go, I simply thought it would be okay for me to do so. Now I know to keep to myself and to turn down any offers unless they come from my closest friends and family. But once I got those texts, I got really hurt and was desperately trying to just end the argument, let her be mad at me for a while and we could go back to normal again.
Well, she was apparently done. She ended the friendship and blocked me. Honestly, while it made me realise just how lonely I am, it also did me some good, I think. I focused on myself, my own studying, and haven't had to retake a single test up to this day. She, on the other hand, had to retake almost all of them. Idk if it was just her being used to me doing so much for her or if something else came up in her life, and frankly, I don't care anymore. I wasn't going to go out of my way to antagonise her or anything, we just ignored each other. Eventually, we had to work together on some project and that led to us sometimes talking to each other during a chat with other people from our group. We say hi when we see each other. But nothing beyond that. She unblocked me (idk if she needed to do that in order for us to be able to create a group chat with a third girl for the project, or if she just randomly decided to undo it, don't care) but we don't text or talk when it's just the two of us. I realised that even if she wanted to make amends, I wouldn't want to be friends with her anyway. I got burned and I learned my lesson. Sometimes I feel like I was being used, sometimes - like I overreacted and was too self-centered. At one point, she saw me crocheting something for a colleague (I picked up crocheting fairly recently, she didn't know about it) and asked if I would make something for her (a specific project that she'd pay me for). I was a bit hesitant and mentioned it to my best friend and she told me not to ever do it. She said my ex-friend treated me the way she did but wanted to still gain from me. So I decided not to do it after all. If she wants it, she can learn or find somebody else.
Now. After some time, when I was still blocked by her, I realised she had two of my books, and I had one of hers. I have been struggling with what to do since then. They're my books and I want them back. I have read one of them and the other one suddenly disappeared from all bookstores here so I couldn't get it if I tried. I'm upset over the fact but at this point I'd rather buy them again than have to reach out to her. But on the other hand, I have that one book of hers - and it's supposedly her favourite.
Now, we're probably going to see each other for the last time for an exam on Tuesday. The next time would be at our graduation in March of 2024. So here's my question: do I bring her book on Tuesday without saying anything? Do I hand it to her and tell her to keep my books or give them away to a library? Or do I keep her book as a hostage in case she ever wants it back?

I recently reached a chapter in volume 64 of the manga and a great question that was asked had me reread an earlier one within the same volume. In doing this, one fact became abundantly clear that I will speak on later.
Introduction:
Undoubtedly, an event that unfolded in Qin's camping around the time of this series put a major blemish on its relationship with other countries they wanted to amicably wrap up affairs with, thanks to the newly assigned Kanki. Almost anyone on the periphery of these events would look at him as the worst person in current history. I as a reader was almost inclined to agree until I remembered a few key statements when we got to know better how he processed affairs. Note that I claim to not pardon his actions on here or other cases, but that is not for me to judge.
Points:
First, he is among the most emotional soldiers on the field, very likely shouldering his past life to influence how he uses his liberties as a general. Someone once disclosed just how angry he actually remains while fighting. While that does not fully justify his actions, I have respect for how thorough he is about conducting war for however limited his understanding may or may not be for its cause. To paraphrase something I think Ghandi pointed out, if you decide to kill a man then you must also commit to killing his son and so on, like when the coalition army rolled into Qin's property. War crimes aside, can we say that certain Zhao commanders around the time of these chapters would not have done the same?
Second, while he comes off as crude and may fail to know how to respect others how they generally want to be treated, Kanki actually has a good eye for people. Even earlier before his emotions were laid bare by one of his former men, the man himself scoffed at how terrible the ambitions of his own state were before unification ever came into play. It is not a surprise that one would begrudgingly serve their state yet not respect its figures. Riboku feels like a loose example of this because he serves his home but not whims endangering her (Zhao). I believe there are other examples I can speak to, like when the Hi Shin unit was sent ahead as a key move in capturing one of five hills in a forest, but I do not think I can use that and other examples to drive my point home about how well he gets to know people.
Third, even he has limits . Back to the Hi Shin hijinks above, he was much less than displeased with the results of their unit's performance, causing the loss of more men than what was expected, I suppose. Another example comes from his criticism of unification, recognizing the ambition as worse than his own actions, which I believe is saying something. To good credit, I suspect that the current king may have failed to relay how he was to realize his ambition fully so that his intentions are not mistaken, even for what he owns up to. But I feel as if I am reaching here. I would still argue that, as the former bandit some of his peers and rivals keep branding him, Kanki has limits. Beheading generals takes skill for working with and against people and consideration for how many lives would be spared, like his best feat during the war against the coalition army.
So, as I woke from a much needed rest and began to read into the seven hundredth chapter, something dawned on me that may keep me from finishing that chapter for today.
The question...
After Kanki brought other key figures in on the news of one of his most trusted men being another key future, chapters before he poses the question "How many?" to seemingly no one in particular for a member of the torturous but effective Saki clan to reply. Unsatisfied, he repeats the question, but distinctly to his trusted strategist, Maron, "How many?"
Look...
Of all the anger he held in his heart, can I tell you that, as one who claims to not be a Kanki apologist how heavily I felt the ramifications of that question he had to repeat? I need a bit more time to process this. And, I just may be reaching but, going from having almost an entire army surrender with so few troops to ending then all may not have been the original plan. He took the loss of his comrade HARD and responded in kind. For such a man who shows so little of what he thinks to even his trusted few, that message was as clear as day for me. This war was no light affair. Not even all victors can process the cost of victory. And I believe it was with these events that...
KANKI! HAS! SNAPPED!